Three Elephant Power, and Other Stories
“Them things,” said Alfred the chauffeur, tapping the speed indicator with his fingers, “them things are all right for the police. But, Lord, you can fix 'em up if you want to. Did you ever hear about Henery, that used to drive for old John Bull—about Henery and the elephant?”
Alfred was chauffeur to a friend of mine who owned a very powerful car. Alfred was part of that car. Weirdly intelligent, of poor physique, he might have been any age from fifteen to eighty. His education had been somewhat hurried, but there was no doubt as to his mechanical ability. He took to a car like a young duck to water. He talked motor, thought motor, and would have accepted—I won't say with enthusiasm, for Alfred's motto was 'Nil admirari'—but without hesitation, an offer to drive in the greatest race in the world. He could drive really well, too; as for belief in himself, after six months' apprenticeship in a garage he was prepared to vivisect a six-cylinder engine with the confidence of a diplomaed bachelor of engineering.
Barring a tendency to flash driving, and a delight in persecuting slow cars by driving just in front of them and letting them come up and enjoy his dust, and then shooting away again, he was a respectable member of society. When his boss was in the car he cloaked the natural ferocity of his instincts; but this day, with only myself on board, and a clear run of a hundred and twenty miles up to the station before him, he let her loose, confident that if any trouble occurred I would be held morally responsible.
As we flew past a somnolent bush pub, Alfred, whistling softly, leant forward and turned on a little more oil.
“You never heard about Henery and the elephant?” he said. “It was dead funny. Henery was a bushwacker, but clean mad on motorin'. He was wood and water joey at some squatter's place until he seen a motor-car go past one day, the first that ever they had in the districk.
“'That's my game,' says Henery; 'no more wood and water joey for me.'
A. B. Paterson
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[Australian Poet, Reporter—1864-1941.]
1917 Edition
THREE ELEPHANT POWER
THE ORACLE
THE CAST-IRON CANVASSER
THE MERINO SHEEP
THE BULLOCK
WHITE-WHEN-HE'S-WANTED
THE DOWNFALL OF MULLIGAN'S
THE AMATEUR GARDENER
THIRSTY ISLAND
DAN FITZGERALD EXPLAINS
THE CAT
SITTING IN JUDGMENT
THE DOG
THE DOG—AS A SPORTSMAN
CONCERNING A STEEPLECHASE RIDER
VICTOR SECOND
CONCERNING A DOG-FIGHT
HIS MASTERPIECE
DONE FOR THE DOUBLE
Chapter I.—WANTED, A PONY
Chapter II.—BLINKY BILL'S SACRIFICE
Chapter III.—EXIT ALGY
Chapter IV.—RUNNING THE RULE
Chapter V.—THE TRICKS OF THE TURF