The Admirable Lady Biddy Fane / Her Surprising Curious Adventures In Strange Parts & Happy Deliverance From Pirates, Battle, Captivity, & Other Terrors; Together With Divers Romantic & Moving Accidents As Set Forth By Benet Pengilly (Her Companion In Misfortune & Joy), & Now First Done Into Print
As 'tis the present mode to embellish a history with a portrait of the writer, it will not be amiss if I here at the outset give you some hints by which you may see, as in a frontispiece, the image of that Benet Pengilly who is about to tell you many marvelous things.
What kind of man I am you may better judge when you come to the last page of this history; my business now is to present my image as I was; to which end I would have you picture a man close upon thirty years of age, clad in a jerkin and breeches of leather, six foot and some odd inches in height, gaunt and lean as a famished wolf, fierce visaged, with an unkempt beard of hair, and a shock ragged as a bush, and both as black as any ink; a deep-sunk, bloodshot eye, and a swarthy skin, all besmirched with broken egg, filth and blood. This pretty portraiture you shall frame in the town pillory, which stood over against the church of St. Mary, in the city of Truro, with this very true description writ under the headpiece:
Benet Pengilly, A Sturdy Rogue.
And now to begin my story, I must tell you that I had stood in this pillory from sunrise, a sport for all the cowards in the town. I say cowards, for surely those who have courage are never cruel to the helpless, and these—the strongest of whom would have fled before me had I been free—had baited me as curs bait a tethered bull, without any kind of mercy, jeering at me, and making me a mark for any beastliness that came to hand, ay, and sharp stones to boot, as the blood from my lips and cheek testified.
There were never less than a couple of score of this rabble about me, hallooing and whooping; for as fast as one left me to go about his business, another took his place. But amongst the constantly changing crowd was one who, seated upon the stone bench where the town porters are wont to rest their loads awhile, never took his eyes off me, nor budged from his place from the time he came hither, which was about ten o'clock, till now, when the sun was past the meridian. He watched me as a surgeon marks the bearing of his subject under the knife; nay, rather 'twas as a fiend might watch the torment of the damned, for a hellish smile crept over his face as some insult more cruel than the rest provoked me to a state of desperation.
Frank Barrett
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THE ADMIRABLE LADY BIDDY FANE:
CONTENTS.
THE ADMIRABLE LADY BIDDY FANE.
I AM TAKEN OUT OF THE PILLORY AND NARROWLY ESCAPE GOING TO THE WHIPPING-POST.
I AM TAKEN AGAIN BY JACK GEDDES AND OTHERS, AND RESCUED BY RODRIGUES.
I COME TO THE CANARIES IN BETTER PLIGHT THAN I STARTED.
TO MY MORTAL PERIL I OVERHEAR A SORDID SCHEME OF RODRIGUES AND NED PARSONS.
I AM NEARLY UNDONE BY MY SHADOW.—NED PARSONS AND RODRIGUES, THEIR ARGUMENT, WITH THE COMPACT THAT FOLLOWED.
THE PERPLEXITY OF BEING NEITHER THOROUGH-FACED ROGUE, ARRANT FOOL, NOR HONEST MAN.
WE ARE OVERCOME, AND WITH BARBAROUS TREATMENT SET ASHORE AND LEFT THERE.
WE FIND OURSELVES ON A DESERT ISLAND, AND LITTLE COMFORT BESIDES.
I QUIT THE ISLAND AND MY FRIEND.
I AM EXCELLENTLY SERVED BY MY FAMOUS INVENTION, AND COME TO ENGLAND NOT MUCH THE WORSE FOR IT.
LADY BIDDY GIVES ME A WORD OF COMFORT.
THE CROSSED HEART.
WE ARE DOGGED BY A BLACK SHIP, TO THE GREAT DISCOMFORT OF OUR COMPANIES.
WE FALL INTO SORE DISASTERS OF RAGING TEMPEST AND BLOODY BATTLE.
THE BATTLE ENDED TO OUR COMPLETE DISCOMFITURE.
I AM SHOT OUT OF ONE SHIP AND CRAWL INTO ANOTHER, WITH WHAT ADVANTAGE MAY YET BE SEEN.
GREATLY PUT TO IT TO KNOW WHAT TO DO, I DO NOTHING.
I MAKE MYSELF KNOWN TO LADY BIDDY, WITH DIVERS OTHER MATTERS.
I MAKE A VOW TO SLAY MY LADY BIDDY, IF NEEDS BE.
I RECKON TO HAVE MADE ONE ENEMY THE LESS, BUT DO FIND MYSELF MISTAKEN GRIEVOUSLY.
HOW RODRIGUES GOT AT THE TRUTH, AND A LIE INTO THE BARGAIN.
LADY BIDDY SORELY PUT TO IT WHETHER TO TELL THE TRUTH OR HOLD HER TONGUE.
LADY BIDDY IS SET ASHORE, BUT LITTLE MERCY THEREIN.
HOW I GOT AWAY FROM THE VILE PIRATE AND SETTLED TONGA HIS BUSINESS.
OF OUR FURTHER ESCAPES, AND A STRATAGEM BY WHICH OUR ENEMIES WERE PUT TO GREAT DISCOMFORT.
I FIND MY LADY BIDDY, AND WE DESPOIL OUR ENEMIES; WITH OTHER FACETIOUS MATTER.
I FIND MYSELF IN THE PARADISE OF FOOLS.
WE THINK THE WORST OF OUR TROUBLES ARE OVER; BUT THEY ARE NOT.
WE ARE ENCOMPASSED WITH BLACKAMOORS, TO OUR GREAT PERIL.
WE ARE LIKE TO BE CRUSHED UNDER A HUGE ROCK.
IN WHICH PROVIDENCE, NOT TO BE ALWAYS SCOURGING OF US, PROVIDES US WITH GOOD ENTERTAINMENT.
A SPEEDY END IS BROUGHT TO OUR CIVIL ENTERTAINMENT.
WE SET OUT FOR THE INTERIOR, AND I FALL INTO MY JEALOUS HUMOR ONCE MORE.
AN EXPLANATION OF THAT CRY I HEARD IN THE NIGHT, WITH OTHER PERTINENT MATTER.
I AM OVERCOME AND CLAPPED UP IN ONE OF THOSE STRONG TOWERS.
HOW I WAS LED ON BY PASSION TO CUT A MAN'S THROAT.
I FIND AN EXCELLENT FRIEND IN PLACE OF A CRUEL ENEMY.
A DISCOURSE WITH MY NEW-FOUND FRIEND MATTHEW PENNYFARDEN.
WE ARE PURSUED BY DOGS AND PORTUGALS.
WE LAY OUR HEADS TOGETHER CONCERNING WHAT IS BEST TO BE DONE.
IN WHICH MATTHEW PLAYS THE BEGGAR AND I THE FOOL.
WE GO FROM VALETTA TO SEEK MY LADY BIDDY ELSEWHERE.
HOW WE CAME TO THAT PLACE WHICH I CALL THE VALLEY OF DEATH.
WE GO DOWN INTO THAT VALLEY OF DEATH.
A GREAT CHANGE IN OUR FORTUNE, WHEREBY I HEAR THE MOST JOYFUL, PLEASING NEWS HEART COULD DESIRE.
MY LADY BIDDY AND I MEET AGAIN, TO OUR JOYFUL CONTENTMENT.
WE TAKE COUNSEL OF THE INGAS AS TO OUR FUTURE, ETC.
MATTHEW AND I CONTINUE THE DISCUSSION, BUT WITH SMALL PROFIT.
MATTHEW LAYS OUT A SCHEME FOR STAYING FIVE YEARS IN THE WILDERNESS.
MY CONSCIENCE GETS THE BETTER OF DESIRE, AND A BIRD BRINGS GREAT JOY TO MY DEAR LADY.
WE PART COMPANY WITH OUR RIGHT GOOD FRIEND PENNYFARDEN, TO OUR COMMON SORROW.
WE GO DOWN THE META, MY DEAR LADY AND I—THE PLEASANTEST JAUNT HEART OF MAN COULD DESIRE.
I AM PUT TO GREAT CONCERN ON ACCOUNT OF A PORTUGAL, WHICH PRESENTLY TAKES THE PRETTIEST TURN IMAGINABLE.
THE RAINY SEASON SETS IN WITH A VENGEANCE, AND WE ARE PUT TO SORRY SHIFT TO KEEP FROM DROWNING.
WE FIND A HAVEN OF REST IN A WONDROUS LAKE; BUT ARE NIGH BEING SUCKED INTO A WHIRLPOOL.
THE RAINY SEASON COMES TO AN END, BUT BY MY DELAY WE ARE BALKED OF RETURNING INTO THE BARAQUAN.
WE TRY ANOTHER MEANS OF ESCAPE, WHEREBY WE ARE AS NEARLY UNDONE AS MAY BE.
I FALL INTO A DISMAL SICKNESS, AND RECOVER THEREOF.
I AM PUT TO GREAT TORMENT BY MY PASSION.
WE ENTER INTO A CAVERN, THE LIKE OF WHICH NO MAN HAS EVER YET TOLD OF.
HOW (AMONG OTHER MATTERS), IN SEEKING TO KILL A SNAPPING BOAR, WE FALL UPON AN OLD FRIEND.
WE COME AT LENGTH TO THE MOUTH OF THE ORONOQUE, BUT WITH DISMAL FOREBODINGS.
TOUCHING THOSE INCIDENTS THAT HAD HAPPENED TO SIR BARTLEMY AS HE LAY AT THE MOUTH OF THE ORONOQUE.
LADY BIDDY BREAKS HER TROTH, AND WE HEAR FALMOUTH BELLS AGAIN.
THE END.