The Adventures of Don Lavington: Nolens Volens

“Mind your head! Crikey! That was near, ’nother inch, and you’d ha’ crushed him like an eggshell.”
“Well, you told me to lower down.”
“No, I didn’t, stupid.”
“Yes, you did.”
“No, I didn’t. You’re half tipsy, or half asleep, or—”
“There, there, hold your tongue, Jem. I’m not hurt, and Mike thought you said lower away. That’s enough.”
“No, it arn’t enough, Mas’ Don. Your uncle said I was to soop’rintend, and a nice row there’d ha’ been when he come back if you hadn’t had any head left.”
“Wouldn’t have mattered much, Jem. Nobody would have cared.”
“Nobody would ha’ cared? Come, I like that. What would your mother ha’ said to me when I carried you home, and told her your head had been scrunched off by a sugar-cask?”
“You’re right, Mas’ Don. Nobody wouldn’t ha’ cared. You aren’t wanted here. Why don’t you strike for liberty, my lad, and go and make your fortun’ in furren parts?”
“Same as you have, Mike Bannock? Now just you look ye here. If ever I hears you trying to make Master Don unsettled again, and setting him agen his work, I tells Mr Chris’mas, and no begging won’t get you back on again. Fortun’ indeed! Why, you ragged, penny-hunting, lazy, drunken rub-shoulder, you ought to be ashamed of yourself!”