Peck's Sunshine / Being a Collection of Articles Written for Peck's Sun, / Milwaukee, Wis. - 1882
Gentlemen of the Jury: I stand before you charged with an attempt to “remove” the people of America by the publication of a new book, and I enter a plea of “Not Guilty.” While admitting that the case looks strong against me, there are extenuating circumstances, which, if you will weigh them carefully, will go far towards acquitting me of this dreadful charge. The facts are that I am not responsible, I was sane enough up to the day that I decided to publish this book and have been since; but on that particular day I was taken possession of by an unseen power—a Chicago publisher-who filled my alleged mind with the belief that the country demanded the sacrifice, and that there would be money in it. If the thing is a failure, I want it understood that I was instigated by the Chicago man; but if it is a success, then, of course, it was an inspiration of my own.
The book contains nothing but good nature, pleasantly told yarns, jokes on my friends; and, through it all, there is not intended to be a line or a word that can cause pain or sorrow-nothing but happiness.
Laughter is the best medicine known to the world for the cure of many diseases that mankind is subject to, and it has been prescribed with success by some of our best practitioners. It opens up the pores, and restores the circulation of the blood, and the despondent patient that smiles, is in a fair way to recovery. While this book is not recommended as an infallible cure for consumption, if I can throw the patient into the blues by the pictures, I can knock the blues out by vaccinating with the reading matter.
To those who are inclined to look upon the bright side of life, this book is most respectfully dedicated by the author.
GEO. W. PECK. Milwaukee, Wis.,
March, 1882.
A St. Louis doctor factory recently turned out a dozen female doctors. As long as the female doctors were confined to one or two in the whole country, and these were experimental, the Sun held its peace, and did not complain; but now that the colleges are engaged in producing female doctors as a business, we must protest, and in so doing will give a few reasons why female doctors will not prove a paying branch of industry.
George W. Peck
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PECK'S SUNSHINE
Contents
“NOT GUILTY.”
PECK'S SUNSHINE.
FEMALE DOCTORS WILL NEVER DO.
CROSSMAN'S GOAT.
A MEAN TRICK.
A FEMALE KNIGHT OF PYTHIAS.
THE TELESCOPE FISH-POLE CANE.
AN ARM THAT IS NOT RELIABLE.
BOUNCED FROM CHURCH FOR DANCING.
POLICE SEARCHING WOMEN.
ABOUT HELL.
UNSCREWING THE TOP OF A FRUIT JAR.
BUTTERMILK BIBBERS.
AN ÆSTHETIC FEMALE CLUB BUSTED.
FOOLING WITH THE BIBLE.
COLORED CONCERT TROUPES.
COULDN'T GET AWAY FROM HIM.
DOGS AND HUMAN BEINGS.
ARTHUR WILL KEEP A COW.
SHALL THERE BE HUGGING IN THE PARKS?
THE BOB-TAILED BADGER.
CANNIBALS AND CORK LEGS.
THE MINISTERIAL PUGILISTS.
MUSIC ON THE WATERS.
WOMAN-DOZING A DEMOCRAT.
A LIVELY TRAIN LOAD.
HOW SHARPER THAN A HOUND'S TOOTH.
A SEWING MACHINE GIVEN TO THE BOSS GIRL.
DON'T APPRECIATE KINDNESS.
RELIGION AND FISH.
A DOCTOR OF LAWS.
THE DIFFERENCE IN HORSES.
ADDICTED TO LIMBURG CHEESE.
TERRIBLE TIME ON THE CARS.
CHANGED SATCHELS.
THE NAUGHTY BUT NICE CHURCH CHOIR.
SENSE IN LITTLE BUGS.
SUMMER RESORTING.
THE GOSPEL CAR.
INCIDENTS AT THE NEWHALL HOUSE FIRE.
THE WAY WOMEN BOSS A PILLOW.
THE DEADLY PAPER BAG
THE VIRGINIA DUEL.
THE DIFFERENCE.
SPURIOUS TRIPE.
A CASE OF PARALYSIS.
MALE AND FEMALE MASHING.
THE USES OF THE PAPER BAG.
THE NEW COAL STOVE.
A COLD, CHEERLESS RIDE.
SOME TALK ABOUT MONOPOLIES.
A BALD-HEADED MAN MOST CRAZY.
ACCIDENTS AND INCIDENTS AT THEATRES.
ALL ABOUT A SANDWICH.
GOODWILL AND COMPASSION.
THE FEMALE BURGLAR.
THE GIRL THAT WAS HUGGED TO DEATH.
OUR CHRISTIAN NEIGHBORS HAVE GONE.
THE SUDDEN FIRE-WORKS AT RACINE.
YOUNG FOOLS WHO MARRY.
LARGE MOUTHS ARE FASHIONABLE.
LOOKING FOR A MOOLEY COW.
THE HARMFUL HAMMOCK.
BOYS AND CIRCUSES.
A TRYING SITUATION.
THE KIND OF A DOCTOR TO HAVE.
THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY ABE TALKING ABOUT.
A KANSAS CYCLONE.
HOW JEFF DAVIS WAS CAPTURED.
THOSE BOLD, BAD DRUMMERS.
ANGELS OR EAGLES.
AN ACCIDENT ALL ABOUND.
PRIZE FIGHTING AND MORMONISM.
MISDEAL IN A SLEEPING CAR.
PARALYSIS IN A THEATRE
THE QUEEREST NAME.
CHURCH KENO.
THE ADVENT PREACHER AND THE BALLOON.
THE CAUSE OF RHEUMATISM.
HOW A GROCERY MAN WAS MAIMED.
CAMP MEETING IN THE DARK OF THE MOON.
ANOTHER VIEW OF THE CASK
THE PIOUS DEACON AND THE WORLDLY COW.
THE QUESTION OF CATS.
THE KNIGHT AND THE BRIDAL CHAMBER.
THE HOUSE GIRL RACE.
THE TROUBLE MR. STOREY HAS.
TRAGEDY ON THE STAGE.
THE MISTAKE ABOUT IT.
THE MAN FROM DUBUQUE.
THE GIDDY GIRLS QUARREL.
DON'T LEAVE YOUR GUM AROUND.
THE WAY TO NAME CHILDREN.
ABOUT RAILROAD CONDUCTORS.
A HOT BOX AT A PICNIC.
BROKE UP A PRAYER MEETING.
SHOOTING ON SUNDAY, WITH THE MOUTH.
A WASHINGTON SURPRISE PARTY.
THE DIFFERENCE IN CLOTHES.
A TEMPERANCE LECTURE THAT HURT.
BRAVERY OF MRS. GARFIELD
ILLUSTRATING THE ASSASSINATION.
THE INFIDEL AND HIS SILVER MINE.
THE GREAT MONOPOLIES.
ANOTHER DEAD FAILURE.
OUR BLUE-COATED DOG POISONERS.
AND HE ROSE UP AND SPAKE.
GOT IN THE WRONG PEW.
PALACE CATTLE CARS.
DUCK OR NO DINNER.
THE GUINEA PIG.
FAILURE OF A SOLID INSTITUTION.
