The Black Fawn

THE LAND IS BRIGHT THE LOST WAGON BIG RED REBEL SIEGE FOREST PATROL BUCKSKIN BRIGADE CHIP, THE DAM BUILDER FIRE HUNTER IRISH RED KALAK OF THE ICE A NOSE FOR TROUBLE SNOW DOG TRAILING TROUBLE WILD TREK THE EXPLORATIONS OF PERE MARQUETTE THE SPELL OF THE WHITE STURGEON OUTLAW RED THE COMING OF THE MORMONS CRACKER BARREL TROUBLE SHOOTER LION HOUND TRADING JEFF AND HIS DOG DESERT DOG HAUNT FOX THE OKLAHOMA LAND RUN DOUBLE CHALLENGE SWAMP CAT WILDLIFE CAMERAMAN WOLF BROTHER RESCUE DOG OF THE HIGH PASS
Evening shadows lowered like a cool, dark wing folding gently over the day, but the coming of night brought no change in the refrain that over and over again kept running through Bud Sloan's brain.
I must not let them know I'm afraid. I must remember my manners. I must not let them know I'm afraid! I must remember my manners! I must not . . .
He clenched his teeth as though somehow that would clamp down on the unwanted words and shove them back into the dark recesses where they belonged. But they were in his brain, not his mouth, and clenching his teeth only seemed to make the refrain ring all the more loudly. He opened his mouth and said before he could stop himself,
I must not . . .
You must not what? Gram Bennett asked.
She sat at the side of the little table in the kitchen and not at the great one in the dining room as when all the Bennetts' eleven children were home. Then Gramps sat at the head of the table and Gram at the foot. But the little table was big enough now that there were only three of them for most meals.
Nothing. Bud choked. I—I was just thinking out loud.
You needn't be afraid to speak up, Allan. If there's something you must not do, you have only to say so.
Gram spoke very gently, but Bud squirmed. He did not wriggle on his chair for he had learned to hide as well as he could what he really felt. To show your feelings was to show your weakness, and there was always somebody ready to pounce on a weakness. He should have known better than to talk out loud.