Christmas Comes but Once a Year / Showing What Mr. Brown Did, Thought, and Intended to Do, During That Festive Season.

Unless otherwise noted, spelling and punctuation have been left unchanged. The spelling “pue” is used consistently. The variation between “De Camp” and “de Camp” is as in the original.
“December 21st, Friday” and other dates agree with the year 1850.

John Brown, Esq.— Citizen of London and Suburban Snob.
John Brown, Jun., Esq.— “Fast Gent;” Son and Heir to the above “Brick!”—I believe you, my boys, rather!
Master Thomas Brown.— Apple of his Mother’s eye—“her Tommy-wommy”—“her dear boy”—“her jewel of a pet.”
Captain Bonaventure de Camp.— Officer, late of the Hon. E. I. Co’s. Service, but now at the service of any one.
Latimer de Camp.— Master of (He) Arts; Elder Son of the above, of Nobodynose College, Oxford.
Wellesley de Camp.— Cadet of Sandboys Military College.
Soavo Spohf.— Composer; Organist at St. Stiff’s the Martyr; Mr. Brown’s ex-friend.
John (Brown).— Footman to John Brown, Esq.; late Private in the 44th foot.
Tobias Strap.— Grocer in Greens, Landlord to Mr. Spohf, and Supernumerary help to any body.