How Doth the Simple Spelling Bee

AUTHOR OF THE VIRGINIAN, LADY BALTIMORE, ETC., ETC.
WITH ILLUSTRATIONS BY F. R. GRUGER
New York
All rights reserved

Hup, hup, hup!

How doth the Simple Spelling-bee Impruv each shining ower.
Of course, I know not how it may be with you; but with me the mail brings daily a multitude of communications that I have not sought, and do not want; nor do I refer to bills alone; and so, when there came one day a printed card saying:—
Why Heifer?
I tossed it into my waste-paper basket, and remembered it no more. Some days had passed, during which I had worked onward at the index of my forthcoming volume, when my memory was jogged by the arrival of a new absurdity:—
Why not Heffer?