Comic Arithmetic

TRANSCRIBER'S NOTE:
The cover image was created by the transcriber and is placed in the public domain.
A FIGURANTE.
Go the whole figure. —Sam Slick.
LONDON: RICHARD BENTLEY, NEW BURLINGTON STREET. 1844.
LONDON: R. CLAY, PRINTER, BREAD STREET HILL.
LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS.
Good wine needs no bush, and, therefore, little by way of preface is necessary to this Work. He who is ignorant of arithmetic, says Archimedes, is but half a man. Therefore, for the sake of manhood , which drapers'-boys and lawyers'-clerks attempt by means of mustachoes and penny-cigars, read this Work,—for if the dead abstractions of this science will make a man , what must the living realities do?—Nothing less than a Phœnix D'Orsay, which is at least 1 man ¾ and ⅝.
Read this book, then, my friends, young and old. It teaches practical philosophy in every chapter; wisdom in every page; and common sense in every line. Get this manual at the fingers' ends of your mind, and your physical and mental powers will be so expanded that you will be able to catch a comet by the tail; take the moon by the horns; knock down the great wall of China, à la Cribb ; or measure the spectre of the Brocken for a pair of breeches, and thus cut a pretty Figure.
Arithmetic is the art or science of computing by numbers. It is national, political, military, and commercial. It is of the highest importance to the community; because it pre-eminently teaches us to take care of Number I. Our ministers succeed according to their knowledge of the science of numbers. Witness the skilful management of majorities of the lower house.
He who understands the true art of Addition , Subtraction , Multiplication , and Division , as here laid down, will not be considered a mere cipher in the world; but will, in all probability, make a considerable figure : and in the figurative words of Horace, be Dives agris dives positis in fœnore nummis.
Let us, therefore, under the guidance and protection of that god of honest men, the light-heeled and light-fingered Mercury, be diligent so to add to our store by subtracting from the stores of others, that we may add to our importance. Let us so multiply our resources, by encouraging division among our contemporaries, that we may see their reduction in the perfection of our own practice .