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Anecdotes of the Great War

FOREWORD

ANECDOTES OF THE GREAT WAR

BLANKETY-BLANK

HAS A MONOPOLY

MERE TYPOGRAPHICAL ERROR

FIGHT OR I QUIT YOU

WOULDN’T BACK OUT

UNDER CANVAS

PUNCTURED

HE WANTED POTATOES

ABSENT-MINDED BEGGAR

AND THE TOOTUNS, TOO

WAR BRIDE RETORTS

TO A CIGARETTE—IN THE TRENCHES

SOME BOSS

WHAT MUFFS ARE FOR

GOING THE LIMIT

TOMMY ATKINS EXPLAINS WHY “IT’S A LONG WAY TO TIPPERARY”

PLENTY TO CHOOSE FROM

WINNING A BET

COCKNEY GERMAN

IT PAYS TO ADVERTISE

INFORMATION WANTED

THE AMUSING MONOCLE

SURROUNDED!

TEXT FOR A BIG “STORY”

NOT AS IT SEEMED

THERE WERE HOPES

FAMILIAR SOUNDS

IMPORTANT MESSAGES

THE JEW AND THE CROSS

RETREAT IN ORDER

SUFFICIENTLY EQUIPPED

“NEXT OF KIN”

HIS BROTHER’S TASK

THE SERGEANTS’ MESS

BOUND TO KEEP OUT OF IT

CLEVER MACKAY

EXCUSE FOR POOR SHOOTING

CORRECT; GO TO THE HEAD

SELF-INTEREST PARAMOUNT

WHY THEY WOULDN’T SHOOT

SHOOK ALL OVER

THE ONLY HINDRANCE

IRISH VS. GERMAN

WISE PRECAUTION

A BLOODLESS BATTLE

AT A PARIS HOTEL

THE LAST RESORT

CRUEL SPITE

AN UNLOVED OFFICIAL

EXTREMITY; MEANING FEET?

AS EVER

AN OLD JOKE WORKED OVER

REASONABLE PREJUDICE

WAR’S UNKNOWN HEROES

THE RETORT JUVENILE

JUST TWO SHOTS APIECE

MISSED THE USUAL SIGNAL

RIVERS IN THE WAR, NOW FAMOUS IN THE WORLD’S HISTORY

A BITING RETORT

WE SUGGEST THIS TO ALL OF ’EM

CAUSE FOR HOME-SICKNESS

REGULAR SEA DOG

PROFESSIONAL TREATMENT

WAR NEWS IN THE PANTRY

DRAWING THE LINE

NO UNION HOURS

MISSED SOMETHING

HIS MEANING IS PLAIN

SOONER OR LATER

INTERRUPTED REPAST

AN EXCELLENT BRIGADE

WHY THEY THREW HIM IN AGAIN

NOTHING TO FUSS ABOUT

FOES AS FRIENDS

STRICTLY OBEDIENT

NOT LIKELY

SOMETHING REPOSEFUL

ENOUGH IS TOO MUCH

TELLING HIM ALL ABOUT IT

THE ENGLISH LIKE THIS KIND

GAVE IT AWAY

A “SHIRT-SLEEVE GENERAL”

GRIN AND BEAR IT

CHANCE FOR A FREE RIDE

KING ALBERT—CHAUFFEUR

TIRED AND CROSS

TURKISH NAVAL EFFICIENCY

ROUGH ON TOMMY

NOT EXACTLY COMPLIMENTARY

THE QUEEN, LIEUTENANT

FINE WORK

NO CAUSE FOR FEAR

GIVE AND TAKE

FUN ON THE FIRING-LINE

DOING HIS BIT

WELCOME PRISONERS

HE KNEW THE ANSWER

A JOKE IN THE TRENCHES

HE KNEW WHERE IT WAS

SUPERIOR MARKSMANSHIP

NOT A THIRST IN THE LOT

HIS SKIRTS CLEAR

SHEEP AND GOATS

JOGGING HIS MEMORY

WILLING TO COMPROMISE

A WOMAN’S WORRY

NOT SUPPLIES ENOUGH FOR TWO

LOVE-LETTER TO A RED CROSS NURSE

HOW HEROES ARE MADE

ANNOUNCED HIS ARRIVAL

STEPPED ON IT

FULLY QUALIFIED

A FINE SIGHT FOR THE HUNGRY

SERVIAN WOMEN

SECOND THOUGHT BEST

PUNISHED FOR HIS NAME

THEIR OWN PRIVATE WARFARE

A BIT OF RUSSIAN WIT

ARMORED CANADIAN SOLDIERS

TRYING HARD TO GET BY

ONLY ONE ROCK

SOUNDS LIKE A TOWN

THE BISHOP’S PRISONER

NECESSARY PRECAUTION

STOPPING THE DONKEY

ONE ON SCOTTY

DEFYING THE KAISER

TEMPERATURE 120°

BUT PERHAPS HE CAN DIG TRENCHES

LATEST SCOUTING STORY

CHINESE SYMPATHY

GIVING HIM A SEND-OFF

SHE KNEW BY EXPERIENCE

WHERE WAR IS NOT HELL

FEROCITY EXPLAINED

COULDN’T BE SCOTCH

HARDLY HIS FAULT

THE GERMANS ABASHED

LOCATING PROGRESS

PERMANENTLY POSTPONED

UNINTENTIONAL LIMITATION

NOTHING NEW TO HIM

ENGLISH HUMOR

NOT A CARUSO

IN WAR TIME

GAVE THE SNAP AWAY

WITHOUT PRECEDENT

AN AGREEABLE MISTAKE

INCONSIDERATE BEGGAR

WHAT THE PILOT KNEW

IT WORKED ALL RIGHT

GERMAN GIRLS CAN KNIT

BLOCKHEAD, EH?

HIS SOLE REASON

IGNORANCE IS BLISS

STROKE OF LUCK

SPECIMEN WANTED

A LONE EXCEPTION

CLEVER EXPEDIENT

WHICH WOULD YOU PATRONIZE?

SARCASTIC OLD VET.

BROTHERLY REPARTEE

MADE IN GERMANY

WOLSELEY’S WAY

IGNORED HIMSELF

ANOTHER ANXIETY

ONE QUALIFICATION

WASTED SYMPATHY

KNEW HIM OF OLD

THIS ORIGINATED IN NEW YORK

TWO POINTS OF VIEW

SOME KIND OF A MARSHAL

NOR ON THE SOCKS

LESS WAR NEWS WANTED

TWENTY STRAIGHT

RUSSIAN EXPECTATIONS

FINDING AN EXCUSE

ONLY A MATTER OF TIME

SOUNDS LOGICAL

UNWILLING MARTYR

THE TAR AND THE TARTAR

DON’T SAY “ROVER”

SCARS OF BATTLE

SUITED TO HIS POSITION

KAISER WILHELM II

AS SEEN IN FRANCE

ANYTHING TO QUALIFY

TAKING THE JOY OUT OF LIFE

ON HIS WAY

MORTIFIED THE FRENCHMAN

CHECKS FOR TWO

SYMPATHETIC SOUL

A QUESTION OF DIET

A GENTLE HINT

A MATTER OF PUNCTUATION

AND THERE ARE OTHERS

SOME BONEHEAD

PROUD OF IT

DIPLOMACY

AN OVER-DOSE

NOBODY CONCERNED

HARD LUCK

HOW HE TOOK HIS

WILLING TO OBLIGE

CAUSE FOR PREJUDICE

SELF-BETRAYED

BRITISH HUMOR

A MIXED BLESSING

OR A BASEBALL UMPIRE

NOT TO EXCEED HIS LIMIT

OUT OF HARM’S WAY

SHOWING HIM HOW

NO EXCEPTION

IN HIS OWN LANGUAGE

SCARED HIM TO THINK OF IT

WHAT HAPPENED TO REIMS

REBUKE THAT DIDN’T WORK

SOMETHING TO THINK OF

A FAVORABLE BALANCE

DISREGARDING THE LIMIT

NO ABBREVIATIONS WANTED

HIS SACRIFICE

UNSATISFACTORY OFFICER

PERPETUAL MOTION

MURDERING HIM

SLACKER GETS BACK

NEW CAUSE FOR WAR

NO ROSE WITHOUT ITS THORN

A GOOD COME-BACK, BILL

ON THE SAFE SIDE

COULDN’T BE DONE

ON THE FIRING LINE

A MATTER OF TRADE

NOT LIKELY

IMPORTANT POSTSCRIPT

OR A SCRAP OF PAPER

NOT TO BE OUTDONE

NEVER FAZED HIM

STAY-AT-HOME TOILET

WHY BE NEUTRAL?

BATHING IN TEARS

WHERE HE COULDN’T GO

PEACE SUGGESTION

HEADING HIM OFF

CAPTURED, NOT STOLEN

LANDED A LARGE ORDER

WELCOME RELIEF

THE USUAL QUERY

BEST OF REASONS

MOST UNUSUAL

MORE SURFACE TO COVER

WORSE THAN WURST

SHE KNEW PADDY

HE HAD SMOKED ONE

SALVAGE

A SOLDIER’S WIFE RELATES THIS

IT SAID SO ON THE DOOR

GENTLE HINT

SOMETHING JUST AS GOOD

NOT ON THE MENU

DYE IS SCARCE

THE HERO

NEEDED A BRACER

AND SMITH COULDN’T DO IT

PAYING HIS RESPECTS

GOT THE MONEY FIRST

FORTUNATE

FEMININE STRATEGY

WAR WORKS WONDERS

UNLIMITED SUPPLY

HER DEDUCTION

NOT A FAVORITE BRAND

AN UNWILLING TARGET

A COMPROMISE

ON A SCOTTISH BATTLEFIELD

IT HIT HIM FIRST

SWEET CHARITY

EXPLAINED

OPTIMISTIC

WHAT STRUCK HIM LEAST

THE TERRIER

MORE THINGS TO KNIT

A QUALIFIED FIGHTER

A SHORT CUT

MORE THAN HE BARGAINED FOR

AS SEEN IN PRESS REPORTS

BEST OF INTENTIONS

DOUBLE TROUBLE

HE LOST THE COUNT

DEADLIER THAN USUAL

NEW USE OF THE WORD

THE ORIGINAL ONE-STEP

MOTHERLY ADMONITION

OTHER INTENTIONS

SLACKERS

A PUTTERING PUTTER

BLACK AND BLUE, PERHAPS

BUT WILL THEY?

SLOW BUT SURE

THE RECRUIT SCORES ONE

OUR GUESS WOULD BE BEER

A RARE OFFERING

WISE RECRUIT

BAD BITE

NEVER ARGUE WITH A WOMAN

THE WHOLE PACK

NO GARTERS NEEDED

WILLING TO SPARE HIM

CHANCE FOR SOME INVENTOR

IN “ZEPPELIN” TIMES

GETTING THE ACCENT

AN OLD KNITTING STITCH

THE DEAR FRIENDS

FIGHTING FOR HIS GLASSES

CONCERNED

MOST LIKELY

TIMID

NOISY TIME-PIECE

IN NAVAL TERMS

SO CHANGEABLE

AMONG THE MISSING

NO LUCK

RECRUITING IN ENGLAND

ALL BUT THE FIG LEAF

LACKED EXPERIENCE

CONDESCENSION

A HEARTHSTONE HERO

STICKING TO IT

THE RETREAT FROM ALSACE

TEETH NOT ESSENTIAL