Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, June 8, 1895

Me and sum of the Gents of the Lundon County Counsel, as they calls theirselves, has had sum considerable differences of opinion lately, but I don't suppose as it will cum to much. It seems as sum on em has got theirselves elected into the Tems Conserwancy Gents, and nothink as is dun quite sattisfys em unless they has the best places on bord the crack steamers as takes em either up the River or Down the River, as the case may be. In course they all wants the werry best heatables and drinkables, and plenty on em; but if the water appens to be jest a little ruff, the one thing as they all scrambles for is plenty to heat and plenty to drink, and a nice quiet seat in the Saloon all the way home.
I herd tell the other day as how as some of the Tems Conserwancy Gents had a reglar quarrel with sum of the County Counsel Gents, all becoz of the diffrence that sum on em wants to make in the way in which things is conducted on bord when agoing on their way home. It most suttenly must make a great diffrence weather it is a nice, brillyant, sunny day, and all happy on bord, or weather it is a dull, dark, rainy day, and not room enuff for harf the cumpany.
I don't find as how as the too partys in the Corporation agrees with one another more than they used to when they used to quarrel so much about everythink. In fack they seems jist as much opposed to each other as ever, and I, for my part, most truly hopes as how as they will continue in the same noble spirit, and then they will hate each other with the same cordial hatred as so distinguished them in days gone by.
I don't know a greater treat myself than spending a nour or too with the County Counsellers at Charing Cross. They can lay the stingers about in splendid style, and both sides of the question, much alike in force, and werry much alike in quolity. But the werry finist sight of all I shoud think wood be to see a thorowly good set to between a picked set of the Tems Conserwancy and another of the County Counsellers. From what I hears of the former I shoud think their chance would be grand indeed, and from what I have herd of their reckless perseverance I should think their loss almost incredible. The Tems is the river for me, and long may it remain so!