Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 146, April 22, 1914

E-text prepared by Matt Whittaker, Malcolm Farmer, and the Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team (http://www.pgdp.net)
Says The Times :— It used to be a tradition of British Liberal statesmanship to support, without prospect of immediate advantage, the cause of nationality and freedom abroad.... It would at least be showing some interest to send a minister to Durazzo. Here, perhaps, is a post for poor Mr. Masterman.
The Kerry News states that it prefers pigs to Englishmen. This seems a queer—almost an ungracious—way of expressing its desire for a Home Rule Government.
Oil has been discovered in Somaliland, and it is rumoured that the Government is at last about to realise that its obligations to our friendlies demand a forward move against the Mullah.
Futurism is apparently spreading to the animal world. The following advertisement appeared in a recent issue of Lloyd's :—
Dyer—Fancy Color Dyer for Ostrich required.
There is a dispute, we see, as to who invented Revues. But, even if the responsibility be fixed, the guilty party, we have no doubt, will go scot-free.
The inhabitants of Bugsworth in Derbyshire, are, The Mail tells us, dissatisfied with the name of their village. A former parish councillor has suggested that it shall be changed to Buxworth, on the ground that it was once a great hunting centre, and took its name from the buck, which used to be found in great numbers there. The present name has also a distinct suggestion of the chase about it.
Extract, from a speech by Colonel Seely on the recent Army crisis:— The only difference is that I am £5,000 a year poorer.... I am not less Liberal but more Liberal after what has happened. To be more liberal after suffering financially does the ex-War Minister credit.
The fees charged by beauty doctors are tending to become more exorbitant than ever. To have his eyes darkened, Mr. George Mitchell, of Bolton, had to pay M. Carpentier, of Paris, no less than £100.