Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 101, August 8, 1891
Sir,—Certainly throw open all our Town Halls for gratuitous concerts and dances! But that's not half enough. Some of us don't care for dancing, and abhor music. What I propose is that Free Billiard-tables should be established in each parish. Billiards is much better exercise than sitting still on a chair listening to singing. Then there ought to be places where one could get municipal tobacco without paying for it. Tobacco is just as much a necessary of life as education—more so, in fact, in my opinion. On winter evenings it would also be nice to be able to step over to one's Town Hall and have a glass or two of free ale, or wine from the wood —also from the rates. I don't pay rates myself, as I happen to live in a flat, but I am sure the ratepayers will immediately recognise the justice of my demands.
UNBIASSED.
Sir,—By all means let us try to give more pleasure to the people. The pleasure, however, should be of a distinctly elevating kind. I would advocate throwing open the South Kensington Natural History Museum in the evening. This would be most useful, especially to people living at the East End, and the amusement thus afforded, though perhaps not rollicking, would at all events be solid. To keep out undesirable characters, it would be as well to admit nobody who could not produce his baptismal certificate, and a recommendation from the clergyman of his parish, countersigned by a resident J.P. I am sure that people would jump at a chance of an evening among the Coleoptera .
Yours, NATURALIST.
Sir,—I cannot understand why people should ask for more amusement than they get at present. Have not they the Parks to walk about in? In wet weather they can take shelter under trees. In winter they ought to stay at home in the evenings, and enjoy reading aloud to their families. I would even go so far as to allow an occasional game at draughts. Chess is too exciting, and of course backgammon is out of the question, because of the deadly dice-box. For the frivolously inclined, Puss in the Corner is a harmless indoor game. I throw out these observations for what they may be worth, and trusting that they will not be regarded as dangerously subversive of morality, I remain,
Various
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Vol. 101.
August 8, 1891.
LARKS FOR LONDONERS.
AFTER THE SEASON.
NEW TORY NURSERY RHYME.
FROM GRANDOLPH THE EXPLORER.
IN THE NAME OF CHARLES DIBDIN!
"Great Scot!"
THE CAPLESS MAID.
THE DIFFERENCE.
Resignation.
A NEW WAY OF PAYING CHURCH DEBTS.
UPON A GLOVE.
OMITTED FROM PORTRAIT GALLERY
WITH THE B.M.A. AT BOURNEMOUTH.
KURDS AND AWAY!
ROBERT SEES THE PHOTOGRAFF TAKEN.
THE HEIGHT OF IMPROPRIETY.
"A LONG DISTANCE SWIM."
"A LONG DISTANCE SWIM."
VOCES POPULI.
BANK HOLIDAY.
THE FESTIVE FORCEPS.
"On the Square."
AN 'UMBLE CORRECTION.
AFTER LUNCH.
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.
THE BUSY PARLIAMENTARY BEES ON THE WING.
AULD-(ER)-MAN GRAY.