Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 150, February 2, 1916

According to the Correspondent of The Daily Mail who described the festivities at Nish, the King of Bulgaria has a curious duck-like waddle. This is believed to be the result of his effort to do the Goose-Step while avoiding the Turkey-Trot.
Owing to the extraction of benzol and toluol from gas for the purpose of making high-explosives it is stated that consumers may have to put up with some decrease in illuminating power. It is expected, in view of the good object involved, that the announcement will be received in a spirit of toluoleration.
We cannot agree with the actor who complains that his manager forbids him to wear his armlet on the stage. The sympathies of the audience might be entirely deranged by the discovery that the elderly villain was an attested patriot while the young and beautiful hero was either ineligible or a slacker.
Describing the depressed condition of the laundry trade a witness at the Clerkenwell County Court said, We are eight million double collars short every week. It is shrewdly conjectured that they are in the neighbourhood of the Front.
Nothing in the course of his Balkan pilgrimage is reported to have pleased the Kaiser so much as a steamer-trip on the Danube. It was looking so sympathetically blue.
The Government is going to close Museums and Picture-galleries to the public. No one shall accuse us of being Apostles of Culture.
It is said that the Australian and New Zealand soldiers now in London are very fond of visiting the British Museum, and take a particular interest in the Egyptian antiquities. But it is not true that they now refer to England as The Mummy Country.
Austrians and Hungarians are said to be quarrelling as to whether the occupied Serbian territory should eventually belong to the Monarchy or the Kingdom, and the jurists on either side are ransacking the history of the past for arguments to support their respective cases. Here we have another instance of the fondness of learned men for disputing about purely academic questions. Serbia will belong to the Serbians.