Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, March 19, 1919

The Project Gutenberg eBook, Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 156, March 19, 1919, by Various, Edited by Owen Seamen
E-text prepared by Malcolm Farmer, Sandra Brown, and the Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team

President WILSON is stated to have played several keen games of shuffle-board on the George Washington . As it is an open secret that Lord ROBERT CECIL has been polishing up his shove-halfpenny in the billiard-room of the Hotel Majestic interesting developments are anticipated.
Primroses, daisies and wallflowers are in full bloom in many parts of the country and young lambs may now be seen frisking in the meadows. Can the POET LAUREATE be waiting for someone to get sun-stroke?
The Commission on the Responsibilities and Crimes of the War have not yet decided that the ex-Kaiser is guilty. At the same time it is said that they have an idea that he knew something about it.
At a Belfast football match last week the winning team, the police and the referee were mobbed by the partisans of the losing side. Local sportsmen condemn the attack on the winning team as a dangerous innovation.
The L.C.C. is training munition girls to be cooks. We understand that the velocity and range will be clearly stamped on the bottom of all pork-pies.
A Stromness fisherman, on opening a halibut, found a large cormorant in its stomach. Cormorants, of course, are not fastidious birds. They don't mind where they nest.
The eclipse of the sun on May 28th should be a great success, if we may judge by the immense time it has taken over rehearsals.
Inspector J.G. OGHAM, chief of the Portsmouth Fire Brigade, who is about to retire, has attended over two thousand fires. Indeed it is said that most of the local fires know him by sight.
Ghost stories, says a contemporary, are being spread about vacant houses in Dublin to decrease the demand for them. The old caretaker's trick of training a couple of cockroaches to jump out at the house-hunter is quite useless to-day.