CHAPTER VI.
The artist whose feelings of brotherly affection were deeply hurt, and who felt the happy expectations which he had formed of this meeting bitterly disappointed, hurried away at a rapid pace. The Priest looked after his brother with a sad dark expression, then sat down on a stone near the roadside and contemplated thoughtfully the deep waters of the river in which the dark firs of the Königstuhl were now reflected. The flow of the water recalled to him the troubled waves of that Canal, in the which for so many years of his college life at Venice, he had gazed, and he thought of the sad morning when he found himself transposed from the small palace in the ever verdant garden in the Chiaia and the blooming orange groves of Naples, to the moist damp walks of the Jesuit college at Venice. Instead of the view over the gulf which sparkled with the coloring of the opal or emerald, he saw with horror the brown slime of the Laguna, His eye accustomed to range from the ridgy peaks of Capri to the noble lines of Vesuvius, now saw on the other side of the dirty ditch, a bare wall without windows from which water dropped down. Accustomed during his hours of recreation to play in the garden with his sister, watched over by the loving eye of a mother, he now found himself surrounded by about fifty boys, who looked as pale and strange as himself, who "for recreation" turned out in a long gloomy corridor, or were taken for an evening walk to the Lido, he at the tail of a long string of companions under the care of a teacher, not allowed to look to the right or left to see the beauty of the proud Venice. At first he thought that he should die in this world without light or mother's love. He had wept during the night time and spent the day in fruitless home sickness. His only occupation was, to pray in silence, as he had been told that it was in his power, to free the souls of his mother and sister from purgatory, and when he felt a melancholy resignation in his captivity, this was caused by the fact that every day which he spent in a convent, gave him ten days remission, which he could pass on to them. Then he became quick of perception in the hours of study, so as to understand the teacher more rapidly than the others and to render more surely and more clearly the subject learnt. The teachers themselves had repeatedly reasserted that Paolo Laurenzano was their best pupil. For the first time he became more reconciled with his new life. As the grain of mustard seed in the Gospel the small triumph of ambition had fallen into the heart of the child, and this little seed grew into a mighty tree and all the passions built their nests therein. Torn apart from all that had been dear to his child's heart, he now knew no joy exceeding that of study or the praise of his preceptor. His every endeavour, his only thought was the task of the following day. Whilst the others played Boccia in the court of the College, or billiards in the dining-rooms, the favorite game of the Holy Ignatius, for Paternosters, or dominoes for Ave Marias, which the loser had to repeat for the winner, he pored over his books and writings. Only one passion governed him, to excel the others, to be the best among good scholars. Whoever opposed him in this, became his foe, and he stole hours from sleep, from play, even from the supervision of the teacher to attain this end. A son of Naples he was a born rhetorician; especially adapted for the cultivation of oratory, and argument was the course of study followed in the school of the Jesuits. Here everything brilliant was cherished, everything which caught public attention: Latin declamation and disputation, poetry, the comedy of the schools, sophistical philosophy and bombastical oratory, in short all empty show which impressed the ignorant. It was in this very rhetorical display that lay Paolo's special gift, and when he, at some of the exhibitions, which were frequently performed in the interest of the College, hailed down his Latin with all the rattling velocity of a Neapolitan tongue on some weaker opponent, or pathetically declaimed in his sonorous soft voice long extracts from Vergil or Lucian, when he hurled down from the lofty rostra pompous speeches in sounding periods at the well-dressed audience, which applauded with the quickness of an Italian assembly every pointed antithesis, cheered every epigrammatic proposition, noisily acclaimed every school boyish twaddle, Paolo felt himself then to be not as other men are, and the proud tread with which he left the platform after the end of his speech might have served as model to the Triumvirate of Rome. Thus the education given by the Fathers had envenomed with the poison of self-love the blood of this gifted boy, it raged within him as a burning fire, and never left him a moment's peace. Something had ever to be learnt, something ever to be done, which none other could do, and he only felt happy in the task of increasing the difference between that which he could do, and that which the others could, so that none could be even distantly compared to him.
The education of ambitious minds, determined to render subject to themselves the sleepy mediocrity found in other schools, was ever a principal object of the Order, and this result of education had been brilliantly attained in Paul. He could be named a pattern scholar of the Institution.
If on the one side the self-consciousness of the young man had been excited to a degree verging on presumption, so on the other side had the moral nature been rendered slavishly subservient. The Fathers of the Society had based the education of their pupils on the psychologically thoroughly correct idea that nothing brings man down to such unconditional dependence as consciousness: the superiors know thy whole past, they know all thy errors, thy secret inclinations and sins, thou art absolutely transparent to them. The first thing therefore that had been required of Paul as indeed of every other pupil on his entry into College, was a general confession, in which he had to mention not only his faults but his preferences. With a child's hand and with his hot southern phantasy had he noted down all his vices, and owing to the mental excitement caused by the death of his sister and his beloved mother, the despairing boy had portrayed himself as a young miscreant. The Rector praised his candor and the severity with which he judged himself and recommended him one of the teachers of the establishment as confessor and spiritual guide. He then learnt from his school-mates, that the secret of the confessional usually observed so strictly did not avail in the College, but that according to the revelations made the confessor drew up his report to the Rector. He was henceforth called upon for a daily record of his actions, thoughts, and feelings, and a strict watch was observed as to whether a pupil kept back or omitted anything. At the same time an especial monitor was appointed over each individually, whose duty it was to watch, reprove, or denounce. This system was all the more pernicious as regarded the relation of the boys one towards another, as the accused was allowed to escape unpunished, if he could manage to prove the accuser guilty of the same misdemeanor, whilst if he could not the punishment was meted out by a powerful boy known as the "Brother Corrector." Under such perpetual supervision was Paul brought up, and at the same time educated in spying others. He was never allowed to enter into conversation, without also listening to what his neighbour was saying, and under no circumstance could he keep to himself anything that had come to his knowledge. In this manner the superiors obtained an information concerning their pupils which left nothing to be desired. With one ear the confessions and self-made acknowledgments of the pupil, with the other the reports and tale-bearings against his school-mates being considered, each character lay exposed before them to its very roots. The pupils however learnt, to use Ignatius' own expression, as they grew older "the difficult art of watching over the portals of the senses" and in this way only did they preserve a scrap of freedom, of self-dependent reflection, of private conscience, a little of the individuality which the inner man always demands, whenever they succeeded in rendering themselves as impenetrable as possible both to teachers and companions. Paul was naturally of a frank chivalrous disposition, but these good qualities shrivelled up in the glow of ambition, fanned by his teachers. In perpetual contest to preserve the first place against his fellow-pupils, he had opponents who were dangerous to him, and it was natural that this ambitious child judged them more harshly and represented them in darker colors than those who acknowledged his superiority without jealousy, and whose mediocrity was to him a foil to be wished for. If he unsparingly, in his sinister ascetic humor, denounced his crimes, should therefore his rivals make themselves out to be better than they were? Eagerly did he watch, listen, spy, denounce, and if one of the rivals was once again through a lucky tale-bearing brought to the "bench of misfortune" or the "corner of disgrace" he felt a detestable contentment. He was therefore anything but loved by his colleagues, and the nickname "the Censor" which they had bestowed on him, expressed the mixture of respect and distrust they felt for him. It was only with time that the young zealot perceived how that he, by every romantic confession he made concerning the devilish abysses in his inner self, had fashioned so many chains which fettered him to the Society of Jesus; for based on these confessions the Rector drew up his reports to the Provincial of the Order and these communications ever increasing accompanied the pupil on his way through life. Wherever an Affiliated might go, he could not escape his past life, whether he settled in the new or old world. Everywhere the eye of the Order was fixed upon him, everywhere was he accompanied by his former confessions, in which were marked out the dark points of his life, everywhere was a fresh book opened for his every deed. Did any one of those entangled in these toils feel a desire to break away, he knew but too well, that the Order had it in its power to destroy him morally. But these paroxysms had not yet been felt at that time by Paolo. He had been filled with a consciousness of the importance of the Order, and he knew, that he had been called to a most brilliant career in connection with a Society spread over the new and old world. The training which he had received rendered him thoroughly aware of his superiority over the rest of the world and over those children of man addicted to the ways of simplicity. Accustomed for years to spy and be spyed, he had assumed a self-command which protected him like an impenetrable iron mask against any attack. It had long become a second nature to him, to utter no word that might be used against him, and even as little to let any escape which he might use against another. Kindly feelings and interests he knew nothing of All that he had brought with him from his father's house, love of family, home, and brother, had been consumed by the blast of ambition. God made the heart of man straight, but it learns many arts in the school of ambition. As a fresh, fantastic, good and beauteous child had Paolo entered College, he left it a pale, ambitious overwrought champion of the Church. He was in his twentieth year, when the Rector of the College declared his education completed, and the school awarded him all the prizes which it had to bestow. It is true that he knew nothing of that inward satisfaction, which usually accompanies the attainment of such an object. The vocation of his life had been up to that time to be primus omnium, and he would have preferred remaining thus for the rest of his life. He had no family who desired to render his gifts of use for this or that interest. The exhortations of the Holy Ignatius to speak of relations only as relations which one formerly had, and the doctrines of the order that the dependence on flesh and blood was one of the strongest chains with which Satan bound us to earth, met no opposition from him as orphan. Homeless as he was, he agreed to become a novice, and was placed among the "Indifferents" who still had the choice open of returning to the world or remaining in the church. The study of philosophy and theology was continued, broken into by services in the hospitals of Venice, by pilgrimages to neighbouring spots famed for miraculous appearances, and by begging in the town, all which duties Paul went through with the same self-negation, which his ambition and contempt of men and life infused in him. At one moment in the sick room holding the crucifix before the closing eyes of some dying man, at another patiently in school repeating texts and prayers suitable to the lisping lips of children, teaching in the churches the catechism and imparting religious instruction, going from house to house begging for alms, or alone in his cell, fasting, praying, and scourging himself. His exemplary zeal brought it to pass, that at the termination of his first probationary year, the Rector declared, that he should be allowed to undertake a sphere of work outside the college, which the General who had arrived that very day from Rome would point out to those about to quit. Immediately, after that this communication had been made to him, Paul was conducted to the Oratorium of the College, where he found the whole institution assembled. The scholars sat in close rows before the very rostra from whence Paolo had uttered with his young lips so much venerable wisdom. The women and maidens of Venice crowded the seats assigned to the public, and near the walls thronged citizens and nobles and even many members of the highest offices of the state. Under the platform numerous wealthy and noble patrons of the College paid homage to the General present from Rome, who clothed in his cardinal's robes, acknowledged with austere condescension the salutations of the Signoria. On this day also, did a scholar ascend the rostra to greet in a well turned latin Ode the General as the honored guest of the house and to praise his virtues. According to the programme another address should have followed, but these curialia did not seem tasteful to the severe old man. He made an imperious sign of the hand and himself ascended the tribune. The stately prince of the Church, a tall ascetic man with harsh features and fiery eyes began in a hard loud voice a powerful sermon on the text "the harvest is plenteous but the laborers are few." He drew a picture of the duties of the Church in the lands of the faithful and of the heathen, in the new and old worlds, by Turks and by Idol-worshippers, and described the wants of the copper-colored heathens, who to-day like the Macedonian of the time who appeared to the apostle at Troas, called to the scholars of the Institution "come help us." Going into details he stated that the mission in Malabar had lost through a rising of the population half of the messengers of the Faith lately send out. For those who might be called upon to fill up these vacancies, the same martyrs' crown and the same eternal life, awaited. Then he called out ten of the pupils by name and asked them: "Are you willing to go to those heathen coasts, to teach Christ, to preach and to die?" The ten young men stood up and answered with one voice: "Yes, General." A shudder ran through the assembly, and in the benches occupied by the ladies no eye was dry. The old man continued: "In Vera Cruz the yellow fever has carried off two thirds of our Convent. The College is empty. The pestilence has ceased, but will return next summer with double severity. The Rector proposes the following Novices to fill the vacancies," and again the hard old man read certain names, in a harsh voice. "Are you willing to sail thither, to preach the Word, and to die, if such be the will of God?" The young men had risen from their seats and they also answered: "Yes, General."
"Worse than heathens or pestilence," continued the aged Cardinal, "is the heresy which rages among the savage nations of Germany on the other side of the Alps. Those whom we send thither, must be armed with all the weapons of the mind, they must perhaps for a time even lay aside the garb of the holy Ignatius and each await his especial danger." A number of names were then called for this service, among them that of Paolo Laurenzano. These young men likewise answered the question as to their readiness, with one voice: "Yes, General."
"You have sworn, my dearly beloved Sons," proceeded the Cardinal, "to die for the sacred cause of the Church. That is not however the most difficult, it is on the contrary the easiest part of your task. Much more difficult is, that which from this hour is incumbent upon you, to live for the Church. To live as if you lived not. You know the vows, in which you have already been approved through the noviciate. In place of poverty many of you will enter into palaces and rich abbeys, and perhaps you will be commanded to share this luxury for a season. In this apparent wealth you will observe your vow of poverty, if you, as the Apostle says, enjoy as if you enjoyed it not; if you are, to use a comparison made by our Father Ignatius, as a column, which suffers itself to be clothed or unclothed, decked in rags or precious stones, without remarking or knowing anything about it, without requiring, or desiring anything. Then indeed in spite of overflowing tables, purple and fine linen you will be observing your vow of poverty. Others on the other hand will have in the woven huts of the Indians, or in the basket houses of the Mongolians scarcely enough to cover their nakedness or appease their hunger. There will be times when a stone will be their pillow and a handful of moss their food. If however at those moments, they direct their attention to trying to render their lot easier, or if they, instead of being devoted by day and by night to their mission, rather let their hearts yearn for the few things which they still have, so will they break their vow of poverty, although they are poor. That they should inwardly free themselves from any joy at possession, is that, which their vow requires of them."
"Secondly our Founder wished his disciples to shine through the vow of obedience. Therewith the outer is not alone meant, that you should unconditionally perform that which is commanded you. In this manner the dog obeys his master, there would be nothing excellent in that. But that obedience should rank as a virtue, the inferior must make the will of his superior his own, he must sacrifice his own insight, so that he should not only will, but also think as does his superior, and he must hold as right and true all that the latter orders and thinks. All your courage depends on the simplicity of blind obedience. 'Incomplete subjection,' says the holy Ignatius, 'has two eyes, but for its own destruction; complete subjection is blind, but in that consists its wisdom and completeness.' You should be filled with a blind impulse of obedience, as Abraham was, when willing to slay his only son, because to obey he considered as a delight. The obedience which made him righteous was that he did what appeared wicked to him, because commanded by God, for goodness is not in itself good, but only because God has commanded it in his law. Abraham moreover knew that this law did not bind God, and he wished for no personal comprehension, no will, no love, no conscience, when God had spoken, only obedience, and therein consisted his righteousness. Whosoever therefore will oppose his own inward light to the Light of the Order is a fool, who wishes to look at the sun by lamplight, and he who suffers from qualms of conscience at the orders of his Superior, should remember, that it is one of the great privileges of our Society, that the members, who are scrupulous by nature, may according to papal assertion calm themselves on all points by the decision of their superiors. That is however the highest step of obedience, which we all have to endeavor to reach, that such scruples may never arise within us, but that a complete uniformity of understanding between our Superior and ourselves may take place, so that we are of one mind, of one and the same will with him, that we hold all that he orders to be reasonable, and take his judgement only as the rule for our own. If in obeying thou dost not subject thy reason as well as thy will, so is thy obedience then no complete burnt offering, in that thou hast not offered thy noblest part to God, thy reason, and a sacrifice, in the which thou keepest back the best for thyself is not acceptable to God."
That was the blessing with which within the same hour Paul left the College, without taking any long farewell, to begin his journey in company with a stately and older member of the order, who called himself Doctor Antonio, over the Alps to the seat of the Bishops of Speyer. All this appeared to him as a dream, and the suddenness of his freedom came over him almost as a terror. With closed eyes the young man passed through the fairest cities of Italy and the smiling plains of Verona. In vain did the peach-trees stretch out to him their ruddy blossoms, and the citrons on the trellis-work were past by unnoticed. His eye was entirely turned within himself and on the duties which awaited him. A feeling of incapacity and fear of the future entered for the first time the breast of the learned youth. To cheer him up, his older companion a lively man with sharp, mobile features enumerated all the privileges to which Paul had a right even as a young novice, member of the Society of Jesus. He could absolve in all cases, even in those where the Bishop had refused to grant absolution, he could declare shore-robbers, convict-slaves, and heretics free from excommunication, he could dispense from vows in case a pilgrimage to Rome could not be undertaken. Even engagements entered into on oath he could declare null and void, in case they militated against the welfare of the Church. Should he finally attain to the higher ranks, he could then grant dispensation from all church punishments even for those given as penalties for schism and heresy, yea even for the falsification of apostolic letters, he was then in a position to invest with the effect of deep penitence an insufficient repentance and to turn mortal sins into venial, not to make any mention of the profound mysteries of the Sacraments. All this he might and could do, or should soon have the power to do, and instead of being proud thereat and raising his head several inches higher, he dragged along weary and heavy-hearted by the side of his talkative companion, who inwardly thought that he did not see why in Venice they had set so much importance on this melancholy dreamer. Reading their prayers, or exchanging monosyllables the two sons of Loyola had ascended the steep rocks at whose base foam the green waters of Lake Garda. Then it came out during the evening at the inn at Arco, that Brother Paul had not even noticed that during the day they had passed through water, and over rocks and snow. His companion shook his head and thought: he will indeed become a Doctor Ecstaticus. The following day he therefore altered his tone and whilst wandering through the dreary Sarcathal to Trent, Father Antonius began to praise the especial protection, which the gracious Mother had ever extended over the Society of Jesus. The Madonna had herself watched over the blessed Ignatius during his last illness, as she now shielded his Sons under her mantle. She appeared lately in a vision to a brother in Catalonia, who was so entranced at her unspeakable beauty that he was seen floating in the air stretching his arms out towards her. In the Collegio at Rome lived a holy penitent in his cell without any food whatever, for the holy Virgin appeared to him night after night and suckled him at her breast as if he were an infant. Countless miracles could the loquacious Father relate, worked by pieces of her veil, or the fair hair which St. Mark had brought with him to Venice. Maria should therefore ever be an object of especial veneration for the order, for like the Pope she wore a threefold diadem. She was the daughter of the Father, the mother of the Son, the bride of the Holy Ghost. Without her God had not been able to create the world, for had she rejected the angel Gabriel, the Son could never have become man, mankind could never have been redeemed, and God could not have created the world without everlasting torment, which his love would have forbidden Him. Therefore did the whole world worship Mary, and the stars were only the large rose-wreath, which the Angels completed, and the milky way the tassels thereof In the rocky districts natural temples to Mary were to be found which even the wild beasts reverenced, and lately a young shepherd discovered one of these Madonna images in a stalactite cavern in Rhaetia, by following one of his sheep, who daily at Vesper-time disappeared into this cavern, and the youth was astonished to see how the lamb bowed its knee and bleated at the altar of Mary as if to greet her. The water which was gathered from this cavern was efficacious against fever and gout, against fires, and it healed demoniacs. Yea it even worked on the soul, for a violent sinner who for years had neglected his easter duties, drank of this water without knowing it, and immediately the blessed potion took effect and he hastened to the confessional.
Father Antonio had almost talked himself out of breath in his praise of Maria, for the way up hill was steep. As he now stood still and inquired of the silent novice what he had to say in reference to all these miracles of the kingdom of Grace, the latter quoted as answer a verse out of Tibullus to Isis the Mother of the Gods. "That thou canst, testify all the tablets, which hang painted to thy honour around the Temple." By this Father Antonio knew that this silent youth was no mere visionary, and from Trent through the bare valley of the Adda to Bolseno, whence Father Antonio diverged towards the snow-covered Pass of the Brenner, the conversation became monosyllabic. Only on the other side of the Alps, behind Innsbruck, did the companions break into a lively quarrel. They had remained in the town quietly, as Brother Antonio had business to attend to. His purse was as he said, quite empty, and to his astonishment Paul found himself woke up at early dawn and bidden to hurry away, as the innkeeper must be robbed of the amount of his bill. The Novice raised no opposition, but when his Superior left the door, he laid on the table one of the two gold pieces, which had been given him in Venice to defray immediate necessities, so that the innkeeper might find his expenses paid. Father Antonius must have suspected something of the kind. He returned to the room, to fetch something that he had forgotten, and when they reached the mainroad he quietly opened his cloth, and added Paul's gold piece to the few farthings left therein. Paul in a rage insisted on returning to give to the hotel-keeper what belonged to him, Antonio asked on the other hand: "Is it better that our holy missions should suffer delay, and perhaps hundreds of souls more be sent to hell, or that this tavern-keeper should lose a few shillings? Let us choose the lesser evil, and by cheating a scoundrel, it is very probable that we become more pleasing in God's sight."
"But if he follows after us, and accuses us before the magistrate of the next village," replied Paul angrily.
"Then we can swear that you laid a gold piece on the table to satisfy his demands."
"But how can you deny having taken it up again."
"When I deny it, I think within my own mind to 'taken up' to add the words 'and not put in my purse,' for as you see I wrap it up in this piece of cloth."
"These Dominican tricks are known, and you will be required to swear without any mental reservation."
"Even in such cases one can swear 'without unjust reservation,' for mine would be especially just, as I am acting in God's cause."
"And do you imagine to be able to bring the heretics back to the cause of God with such miserable casuistry?" asked the enraged Paul.
"No, my son, I am not such a fool, we shall convert the Germans, by lighting such a fire in Germany, as will cause the angels to draw in their toes, and melt the stars in Heaven."
"You have your own peculiar way, of caring for Germany's happiness."
The old man laughed. "Do you think I have climbed these rocks to make Cimbrians and Teutons happy. I will once more bring back the Roman dominion which the Emperor Constantine bequeathed to the Pope, so that we do not, when Christ returns as Cæsar, as depicted by Michael Angelo in his Last Judgment, or as Emperor on a white horse, as the revelation of St. John describes him, have to appear before Him and say: 'Salve semper Auguste, but we have lost the two Germanies.' If however you hold to rendering people happy, go over to the Waldenses."
Paul was silent. It was impossible to take this man seriously, but it cut him to the quick to see such a fantastic Being wearing the dress of his order. As however they sat down to breakfast in the next village, sounds of loud voices were heard at the door. The two pilgrims recognized the voice of the tavern-keeper of Innsbruck, who was inquiring about them. "Give me your purse," said Brother Antonio coolly, "that I may satisfy him." Unwillingly Paul handed it over to him and Antonio disappeared. A short time afterwards the magistrate of the village appeared with the inn-keeper and began cross-questioning Paul. Paul knew from this that his companion had run away and cheated him out of his money; calmly he ripped from out of the lining of his cloak one of his last pieces of money which he had secreted there, and paid the reckoning. He was thus luckily able to say that through this means he had escaped without imprisonment or bodily chastisement. His desire to overtake his escaped companion, was naturally not very great. Instead of travelling north towards Munich, as his companion had proposed, he took a western course through the Vorarlberg towards the Rhine valley, and arrived at the College at Speyer even before the allotted time. The Rector heard his report coldly, and said:
"Thou hast come out of thy probation badly, brother Paul, and broken through the rules in two instances. Thou knowest that the members of our order must ever travel in couples, as the Saviour sent out his disciples two by two. Thou hast also sinned against thy vow of obedience. Thou still thinkest to oppose thy conscience, thy reason, thy will to those of thy superior. The Holy Ignatius did not say however without cause: 'When God has placed over thee even an unreasoning animal, do not refuse to obey it in all things as thy guide and teacher, God has so ordered it,' and again he writes: 'If the Church of Rome declares as white, what appears to thee black, thou shalt not believe thy own eyes, but those of the Church of Rome.' Instead of this thou hast set thy own inward light above the revealed command, as do the heretics. We know now, how we stand with thee."
Thus Paul had to begin his stay in Speyer with severe exercises, which were to punish him for something, which still appeared to him as the usual and plain mode of dealing of every honest man. The Rector perceived however that here he must not draw the bow string too tight, and therefore the universally beloved Father Aloysius was appointed as Paul's confessor and spiritual guide, his mild and calm nature soon winning the latter's confidence. Paul did not make any further mention of the annoying event which happened on his journey. He had now learnt that a monk must submit to an injury, without complaint. Other sorrows however tortured him much more than the question whether he or this Brother Antonio had been in the right. As he finally concluded to frankly confess to this worthy Father Aloysius how it stood with him, to lament to him the feeling of emptiness and solitude which weighed him down, to acknowledge the utter absence of joy and hope which had come over him, his confessor made him no reproachful reprimand, but said gently and kindly to him: "Be of good cheer, my son. Many, many a young man has been tormented by the grievous thoughts, whether unendless sorrow and heaviness awaited him, who however stood on the brink of a richly endowed life; thou knowest however, that the morning star rises above all these dismal fogs and lowering clouds." These kindly words distilled themselves like balm over the mind of Paul, and he had never before experienced so vividly the advantage of auricular confession. Father Aloysius became a shining model of one fulfilling the most severe duties. He would become like to this aged delicate man, who devoted every moment of his life to others, in the care of his penitents, his poor, his sick. Unreservedly did he describe in his next report these inward sensations concerning his mode of life. The effect of this confession was a removal to Heidelberg. The Superior found that the young Brother Paul was wasting his life in fruitless inward contemplation; the young wine must fill some new bottle, lest it be spoiled, moreover the peace-loving method of which Father Aloysius was the model, was not to be recommended to the young man in these moments of warfare. So Paul was commanded to accept a call to Heidelberg, which had just been offered to him. "You will have there a worldly-wise superior," said Father Aloysius when wishing him farewell, "the Doctor Pigavetta as he is known in the world, and I fear muchly he has made the world a part of his individual self, still he is more active than I am, and perhaps his unrest will be of more use to thee, than the monotonous intercourse with an old man like myself, who has perchance already wearied thee. Shouldst thou however be in need of inward peace, thou wilt ever be welcomed by Brother Aloysius."
A straight level road brought Paul from Speyer to Heidelberg, and this time he was determined to blindly obey his new Superior, as prescribed by his vow. Modestly did he knock at the door of the house near the Klingenthor. His tranquillity was sorely tried, when on the door opening he found standing before him his travelling companion Doctor Antonio. He had on the same velvet cap and dark cloak, which he had worn on the journey, and noticed with visible complacency the horror of the novice. Paul composed himself and asked in a dry tone to see Doctor Pigavetta. "Go up stairs and you will find him," answered Brother Antonio coolly. A number of spiral staircases led Paul to the upper part of a tower, where he found Dr. Pigavetta's name inscribed on a door. At his knock a well known voice bade him enter, and as he opened the door he saw before him the same man whom he had met below in travelling costume, seated near a table in a long dressing gown, and apparently deeply studying some books and papers. This appearance completely confused him. Which was the veritable Antonio? He bowed his head and waited patiently till this mysterious stranger chose to address him. "Your credentials," said the Superior in a cold tone of command. Paul handed his cypher-letter with trembling hands. After that the former had read it through, he said with an expression of quiet contempt: "I think, young Brother, that our first acquaintance will render obedience to your new Superior easier for all times. You may depend upon it that whenever I give astonishing commands I have my reason for doing so, and you will henceforth be more sparing of your little bit of worldly wisdom. That in Innsbruck it was not for the sake of a few pennies, you might have discovered from a man of my appearance, had you not been a short-sighted bookworm. Now that you have acquired this knowledge through your own wisdom, you will perhaps kindly remember your vow of obedience. In any case we know each other well enough, to accommodate ourselves to each other." Pigavetta was silent and a sarcastic smile curled his upper lip. So this was the same Dr. Antonio with whom he had travelled, into whose care he was again committed. Inwardly Paul boiled over with wild rage, but he would give his superior no cause, to report him again for disobedience. He remained standing in the same humble position adopted by novices before the initiated. The joker in the former soon came again to the surface. Laughing he clapt the young man on the shoulder and said: "Be merry, be merry, little brother. 'Jovial people are worth twice as much as sad ones,' said the Holy Ignatius, and our vows do not require us to hang down our heads. Thus I welcome you to Heidelberg, and first of all you must pledge me." Then the old Jesuit took a bottle of water, poured out its contents into a vessel in the wall, turned on a little tap and immediately red wine flowed out. "Drink to our welfare," he said, as if there was nothing remarkable in all this. Paul sipped, but as the wine was strong and with a bouquet, he put down his half emptied glass on the table and said: "Pardon me, Reverend Father, I am not accustomed to wine."
"As you will," replied the Doctor. He then took the glass, poured the wine back into the vessel in the which was the water, opened the same tap out of which wine had previously flowed, filled the glass with pure water, with which he rinced it and placed it on one side. Paul felt that his head was turning with all this excitement, and as he leant against a chair which stood before him, it began to play and sing. "You feel unwell," said Pigavetta, "go out into the air, and come to the Collegium at the hour of Vespers. I will then introduce you to the teachers." He was thus dismissed. As he however reached the house-door as in a dream. Dr. Antonio stood suddenly before him in his travelling clothes. He appeared to have returned from a walk and said calmly: "It is well that we meet again, here is the gold piece which I borrowed of you at Innsbruck," he then coolly turned his back on him.
Paul stood before this uncanny house with a dull feeling of stupefaction. The wine had gone to his head. He hastened therefore to a clear little brook on his right to bathe his temples and wash this dream away from his eyes. On thinking calmly over the matter he felt very certain that Dr. Antonio had been making a fool of him. The trick of turning water into wine together with the musical chair was too childish to impress him, but that which rendered him most sceptical was the returned purse. As Antonio had not paid the innkeeper at Innsbruck, he therefore owed him two gold pieces and a lot of small change, it might be also, that the money returned to him was a lucky-penny, but previous proofs did not seem to confirm this. The Professor's magic arts appeared to the novice as being of a dubious character. The double appearance in the study and at the door Paul finally explained as being one of those contrivances which he had often seen as a part of his brother's scaffolding works. There was evidently a lift in the Tower, by which Pigavetta could get up and down much quicker than his visitors who had to use the winding staircase. The more however that his superstitious fears were allayed, the more did the feeling of discomfort increase, at being placed in a strange country under a man who bore two names, calculated very inexactly, and either possessed or pretended to possess the gift of a double identity.
Nevertheless the new calling which he had accepted did away for a short time with his melancholy. For a few months all went on well, when however the first winter came to an end, and the mild blasts came over from Italy, the old feeling of despondency once more seized the lonely Youth. The dark thoughts, which had been dispelled by his intercourse with the excellent Father Aloysius returned with twofold power. He wandered about with an inward wretchedness, which crippled his every action. Such was the condition in the which Felix found him, as they met once again after so long a separation.
The malady which had befallen Paul, is better described as an opposition to his brother's health, who had already spent a winter with him in Venice.
Felice had followed Paul to Venice, and the young artist had been full of ardor to make use of a better instruction in that mechanical part of his profession, now offered to him at the Collegio. Soon Felix became almost more thankfully submissive to the order than was his brother Paul. The Architect learnt here the theory of his art, mathematics, geometry, mechanics, without a knowledge of which he had ever remained a mere dabbler. His mind found nourishment in the rhetorical and poetical exercises, and after he had laid aside his chisel and apron, it was his delight and highest joy to hear in the College lectures on philosophy, literature and poetry. He knew little of the inward hierarchic motive-power, and when he by means of the Society's influence received a brilliant offer in the Netherlands, he left the College with a feeling of gratitude, which inwardly was boundless, although he seldom found opportunity of proving it. The exact contrary was the case with his brother. The last moments of his stay in College had been a mere tribulation, for the long years of ambitious excitement began now to tell. Accustomed to applause, even the highest measure which could be bestowed on a novice no longer satisfied him. The clearness in the exposition of science, which delighted his more ignorant brother, appeared to him already superficial; the bands, which his brother did not even perceive, began already to oppress him, and inwardly less subservient to the Order than Felice, so much the more did he wish outwardly to serve it, thinking thus to subdue his inward uneasiness by a galling outward activity, to deaden the feeling of dissatisfaction, to appease the hunger after happiness which had awakened in him. Therefore now in Heidelberg did he passionately buckle to the work assigned to him, without troubling himself much about Pigavetta. After all the time of preparation he found himself opposed to a task, which was important if rendered so by him. For the outside world an inferior member of a theological seminary, he felt himself an historical lever, which was designed to throw an entire people into other religious grooves. The idea was sufficiently phantastic, that a tutor of philology should from this subordinate position demolish the Church of the Kurfürst, but Paolo clung to the maxim of the founder of his order, "should God bid you cross the sea, go you in a ship, but if there be no ship, then cross on a board." In Speyer he had received the order to enter for the degree of Master of Arts at the University of the Kurfürst, which to him was mere child's play. Pigavetta had imposed on him the part of a good Calvinist, for which violent abuse of the Lutherans was all that was necessary. But now his Superior laid before him an order in cypher from the Provincial which commanded him to pass an examination before the Council of the reformed Church pro ministerio, and to take the position of clergyman in Heidelberg. For the first time he hesitated. The better man in him reacted against the hierarchical. He was willing to play the comedy of Calvinism for a time, but he was too proud to make it the purport of his life. Being told that he must become a reformed clergyman so as to better spread the Catholic dogma, awoke in him a feeling of discomfort, even though he shared the opinion of his teachers, that every means was good which proved of service to the highest good, the Church. But the proposition found a powerful ally in the oratory lying fallow within him, and which longed for an auditorium, a pulpit and the applause so thirsted after. He was already weary of explaining the Latin authors to the sleepy scholars of the Sapientia College. With what an enthusiasm did he daily introduce descriptions of the splendor of Italy in his lectures, so as to call forth a home-sickness for Rome in the hearts of the young Germans,--they however yawned in his face. With what ingenuity had he found pieces out of Seneca and Plato, to which he could append quotations from the Church Fathers in support of the Catholic dogma,--the worthy scholars cut large holes in the oaken benches and thought about, not his conclusions extracted from Festino and Barbara, but of a barmaid of the same name in the adjacent pot-house. In lofty sounding words did he glorify the great men of the Church's past, the scholars threw paper balls, or mutually smeared each others' seats with cobbler's wax. Whether Rome, or Wittenberg, that was for him the momentous question of the day, to them it was of much more importance, whether the beer at the Schiltzenhof or at the Hirsch was better. Evidently the heretics were not to be gotten at through the male sex of their hopeful progenies. He was soon very tired of "nipping the horn of the bull," as says the Italian proverb. Then came the unexpected command of his Superior to turn the full force of his activity to the pulpit. Disgusted at a want of success among the sleepy youths, and famishing for praise, the order given him to undertake the ambiguous rôle rendered his decision easier. His inward scruples were soon silenced, as his eloquence received the highest meed of praise. Hearts were moved by the melodious voice of the Italian, by the grace of his appearance, by the charm of his foreign accent, and Paolo's bold dreams of a counter-reformation appeared about to be consummated when he saw, how Sunday after Sunday the ranks of his hearers filled more and more. The intoxication of success deafened the voice of conscience, which warned him, that he was in reality carrying on a very critical line of action, and he was therefore little pleased when the Countess Palatine singled him out for the Stift at Neuburg, and took him away from a career so full of promise. To win back a lost convent already seemed to him as too contemptible a matter for a man of his gifts, and it went almost against his grain to be compelled to learn once more the almost forgotten services of the Mass, and to hold a surreptitious service, which owing to the Kurfürst's hatred of the "damnable bigotry" might cost him dear. Even the confessions of the old ladies, their thoughts, the monotonous relations of their troubled dispositions, their inward sorrows and sore temptations were not quickening to him. Young himself he felt an attraction towards young people. Owing to this very human cause the instruction which he had to impart to the young maidens of the cloister-school, was not so burdensome as that bestowed on the classes of the Sapientia. Fresh and blooming as beauteous buds just bursting from their shells sat the girls and children before him, and listened eagerly to every word he spoke. They understood intuitively what he wished, and in that breath of love and admiration, which met him on all sides, it seemed to him as if his parched soul lived again, and as if feelings awoke once more, which had slumbered since he saw the pale thin woman, who had watched over him during his youth, borne away in her coffin. If when in the College he had rejoiced that his lessons were over, now did he willingly place himself at the head of his young ones, and accompany them in their walks around the convent meadows. Above at the spring house, lower down sitting under the spreading beeches he taught the children to build altars, and wind wreaths. He showed them how the beloved angels vanished through bushes, or looked down as clouds from heaven and bore away a greeting from each child to the Mother of God. At other times he drilled the young ones into forming processions and pilgrimages, teaching them to sing guileless texts adapted from catholic books. Thus could the children play at being catholics without the parents becoming aware of it. It is true that once the miller's wife complained that her little daughter had burnt the name of the Holy Mary in her arm, and that Reinhard had cut the same in an apple-tree. The Domina however calmed her by saying that through that the little maiden would not get a fever, and that the apple-tree would bear a double crop.
The Magister had also quiet talks concerning the welfare of the soul with the older girls, and the maidens acknowledged, that they had never before conceived how bad, how in reality wicked they were, but their heavenly good Magister knew how to console them so lovingly, that they had never been so happy as at the present moment. But how came it to pass that about this time Lydia Erast took to complaining that recently in their games the less agreeable positions were always given to her, and that when playing: "Do not look round, the Fox is about," Clara and Bertha, who used to be her best friends, now struck out at her more spitefully even than did the others? How came it also that the usually so grave Magister came at times out of the class rooms with a happy smile such as had never been seen on his lips when leaving the Sapientia, and instead of reciting his breviary warbled the Odes to Lalage to the astonished beeches? How all this came about, he himself knew not. At first his eye had rested unwittingly on this fair head, as a young teacher when giving the first lesson, out of embarrassment fixes his look on some bright face, a particular pillar, or the corner of one of the benches. Next the bright blue eye fixed on him with touching devotion had attracted him, and soon he had to acknowledge to himself, that he especially directed his teaching to that sweet child, that only for her did he prepare the substance of his discourse, that he only saw her, only thought of her, only heard her answers, though she in no wise surpassed the others in mental acquirements. An indefinite yearning seized him, to see her always before him in all the classes. Thus the misery, which rendered his days peaceless and his nights sleepless began, and cast him into that inwardly at variance, gloomy state of mind, in the which his brother found him.