VAULTING AMBITION
“Bang!” exclaimed Bob, with a laugh. “That was saying something, Jimmy. You surely hit the bull’s-eye plumb in the center that time. Guess that will hold you a while, Herb.”
“It was a terrible slam,” acknowledged Herb. “If I weren’t so busy eating this pie, Jimmy, I’d be tempted to make you take back those cruel words.”
“Nary take,” said Jimmy, positively. “I said ’em, and I’ll stick by ’em. Besides, it’s so. Isn’t it, Bob? I’ll leave it to you.”
“Well,” said Bob, “in the interests of truth I’ll have to admit that as a rule I’d rather have a stomach ache than listen to one of Herb’s home-made jokes. But on the other hand, some of them aren’t so awfully bad. If you took one and polished it up a bit here and there and changed it around a little, it might be good enough to raise a laugh in an insane asylum.”
“It seems to me I remember once, a long time 152 ago, when he made a joke that was so funny that we all laughed at it,” said Joe. “It hardly seems possible, but I’m almost sure I remember it.”
“Oh, you’re all bugs, anyway, so that doesn’t prove anything,” said Herb, calmly finishing the last of his pie. “But some day, when I become a world-famous humorist, you’ll realize how dumb you were not to appreciate my jokes. Now you get them free, but then it will cost you money to hear them.”
“It will never cost me any money,” said Bob, with conviction. “I wouldn’t give a plugged nickel for a book full of them.”
“Neither will anybody else,” said Joe. “If you have any idea of ever making a living that way, Herb, you’d better forget it. You’d starve to death, sure.”
“Well, it’s a cinch I won’t have to starve to death right now, anyway, so quit your croaking,” retorted the much abused Herb. “Whoever told you fellows that you were judges of humor, anyway?”
“A person doesn’t have to be an expert to judge your jokes,” came back Joe. “If he knows anything at all, he can tell that they’re rotten.”
“All your friends seem to have very decided views on the question, Herbert,” laughed Frank Brandon. “The popular vote seems to be heavily against you.” 153
“Oh, their opinions aren’t worth worrying about,” said Herb, complacently. “As long as I know my jokes are good, I don’t care what they say.”
“That’s the spirit,” encouraged Brandon. “Remember, all great men have had to fight an uphill battle against criticism.”
“That’s true,” said Herb, with a melancholy sigh. “And what’s more, if you can judge by the amount of criticism, I must be going to be extra great. Still, that’s likely enough, I suppose.”
“Don’t stop him, fellows,” said Bob, with a mischievous grin. “Let him rave on. If he enjoys kidding himself that way, why should we wake him up?”
“Aw, you fellows who think you’re so smart are probably kidding yourselves,” said Herb. “Nobody could really be as smart as you Indians think you are and live to tell the story.”
“That’s one of the failings of human nature to rate ourselves too highly,” interposed Dr. Dale, with a smile. “But now, how would you all like to go in and hear the rest of the concert? We’ve missed only the first part, and there’s still quite a good deal to come.”
They all acceded to this proposal with alacrity, and found that, as the doctor had said, they had not missed much of the programme. The wireless 154 apparatus worked to perfection, and they could hear everything perfectly.
“The static isn’t nearly as bad to-night as it was a month or two ago,” said Dr. Dale. “At times last summer it interfered a good deal with my receiving.”
“Yes, it’s always a good deal worse in summer than in winter,” remarked Frank Brandon. “I always advise beginners not to start at wireless in mid-summer, as they sometimes get such poor results with their small sets that they get discouraged and give up the game altogether. It’s better to wait until fall, and then by the next summer they’ve had experience enough to know how to reduce the bad effects of static.”
“It used to get pretty bad sometimes at Ocean Point last summer,” observed Bob. “Once or twice our concerts were almost spoiled by it, while at other times we’d hardly notice it.”
“With that set, you ought to be able to get any broadcasting station in the Eastern States,” said Brandon. “And if you have luck, and conditions happened to be just right, you might even get something from the other side, although of course that isn’t very likely.”
“Oh, we’ve been talking about that, but we don’t really expect to,” said Joe. “We might be able to get the wireless telegraph signals from the other side, though, don’t you think?” 155
“That’s likely enough,” answered Brandon. “The best time to get them is late at night, when the broadcasting and amateur stations are not sending. I’ve often sat and listened with Brandon Harvey to the big station at Nauen, Germany, or to the Eiffel Tower in Paris.”
“Jimminy!” exclaimed Herb. “We’ll have to bone down at our language courses at high school, fellows. I suppose that they send in whatever language the people speak where the sending station is located, don’t they?”
“As a rule they do, but not always,” replied Frank Brandon. “It depends to a great extent where the message is being sent to. If it is being sent to this country, it is often in English, while if it were being sent to France, it would be in French, naturally.”
“Yes, I suppose it would have to be that way,” said Bob, thoughtfully, “although I never thought about that side of it before. It won’t make much difference what language they’re sending in, though, so long as we know that we can get their signals. It will be a lot of fun, though, trying to make out what they’re saying.”
“It will be a good alibi, anyway,” said Jimmy. “If we can’t understand the dots and dashes, we can just say that they’re sending in German or French or Italian. Nobody could expect us to know all those languages.” 156
“If they did expect it, they’d be badly disappointed,” said Herb. “I’ve been wrestling with French for three terms now, but I don’t seem to know much more about it than when I started.”
“I can believe that, all right,” said Jimmy. “Only day before yesterday you flunked your recitation in French, and the professor told you that you were forgetting your French faster than you were learning it. He was right, wasn’t he?”
“I’ll say he was,” said Herb, shamelessly. “At the rate I’m learning it, it would be strange if I weren’t forgetting it faster. I’ll have to do a lot of cramming to pass the mid-term exams.”
“You fellows had better quit your talking and listen to the music,” suggested Joe. “Here’s a swell quartette that has just been announced. Can the chatter and do a little listening.”
“That’s easy,” said Herb. “I’d rather hear a good quartette than almost anything else I know of.”
For another hour or so they listened to the concert, which turned out to be an unusually fine one. Then, when the last selection had been given, Mr. Brandon rose to go.
“I’ve had a wonderful afternoon and evening,” he said, “and I’ve enjoyed every minute of it. I hope the next time you give a party like this, Doctor Dale, that I’ll be invited again.”
“You surely will,” replied the doctor, heartily. 157 “The latch string always hangs outside the door for you, you know.”
The radio boys also expressed their appreciation of the entertainment they had received, and Doctor Dale invited them cordially to come again.
“I’d like to be at the station to-morrow to meet Larry,” he said. “But as to-morrow is Sunday, I shall be unable to get there. But don’t forget to give him my congratulations on his success, will you?”
This the boys promised to do, and then they and Mr. Brandon said good-night and started homeward.
“My, but this has been a full day,” said Bob. “We’ve certainly been moving some since this morning. And think of all we’ve accomplished. I’ll bet Larry will get well so fast now that he’ll surprise the whole lot of us.”
“I’ll bet Tim will be glad to hear about it,’” remarked Joe. “I wonder if he’s got an engagement yet.”
“He hadn’t, up to a few days ago,” said Bob. “Larry told me that in one of the letters he had received from him he said he had several prospects, but nothing definite. You know, of course, that Chasson wouldn’t keep Tim after Larry’s accident broke up the act.”
“Yes, Larry told me about that,” replied Joe. “I guess poor Tim has had pretty hard sledding 158 lately, too. But he has his health, and I guess he’ll land an engagement soon, if he hasn’t already got one.”
“He’s too clever a dancer to be out of work very long, it seems to me,” said Herb. “If I were manager of a show, you can bet I’d snap him up pretty quick.”
“That’s right,” agreed Jimmy. “He’s certainly a crackerjack dancer, but there is one thing about him that I never thought much of.”
“What’s that?” asked Bob, curiously.
“Why, haven’t you ever noticed what a light appetite he has?” asked Jimmy. “I’d be ashamed of myself if I couldn’t eat more than he does. He’s always through a meal before I’ve fairly got started.”
Frank Brandon laughed at this and interrupted.
“Guess I’ll have to say good-night, fellows,” he said. “Here’s my hotel, and I, for one, feel tired enough to sleep. I’ll try to be at the station to-morrow to meet Larry, but I won’t promise. I’m expecting instructions from the government that may change my plans at any time.”
“You don’t expect to have to leave Clintonia soon, do you?” asked Bob, anxiously.
“No, I hardly think so. Not right away, anyway,” answered the wireless man. “I may have to be away a few days, but I’ll be back again soon.” 159
“We’re all hoping that you’ll be stationed here permanently,” said Bob, as all paused in front of Mr. Brandon’s hotel. “We’d hate to see you transferred away from here.”
“That’s mighty nice to hear,” said the radio expert, and his tone left no doubt that he was in earnest. “You may believe that I’ll do my best to stay here, anyway. This is the center of a pretty large territory, and the wireless business is growing so fast that it’s possible I’ll be able to. We’ll make the most of the time I’m here, anyway.”
“You bet we will,” said Bob. “We’ll be looking for you at the station to-morrow, anyway, but if you’re not there we’ll tell Larry why you couldn’t come.”
The boys said good-night to Frank Brandon, and started on the short walk to Main Street and their homes.