CHAPTER III.
When I rode along the forest road, I saw Gaudens at his work. He wore a soldier-cap, and whistled "Die Wacht am Rhein," while clearing up the ditch beside the footpath.
The valley stream was frozen tight, the trees were heavily laden with snow. Ludwig reported that he had purchased machines in America and England for our mill. With the aid of these, the winter would, in future, not prevent operations. Finished work could be set up, except when the orders were to ship the articles in separate parts. It seemed as if he contemplated remaining with us, as he had settled up much of his business in America. Besides, on his way home, he had taken some large contracts from building associations. When I expressed surprise at the varied fields of his activity, he said, "Father, I have remembered this from what I have learned of music; you may play a different air with each hand, and still both must be in harmony. My right hand plays the melody 'personal advantage,' my left, the melody 'public weal;' sometimes they change about, too. I have built water-works, that were for the good of many; but they were good for me, too, and I do not think that without this I would have built them so cheerfully. Just now a great mania for building prevails among the people, and we shall be able to give employment to many good laborers who have been driven out of France."
We came to the saw-mill near the bridge. Here, on the same day that the news arrived of Anton's death, a workman had lost three of his ringers by the circular saw. Ludwig went to the man and engaged him as sorter of the different kinds of timber.
The saw-mill was stopped, and all the shutters were closed. Here we met Joseph, who informed us that since the death of his son, the owner of the mill had lost all energy and pleasure in his business. He had removed to a daughter of his in the opposite valley, and wanted to sell the property. "You must buy this, and work for us," cried Ludwig.
Joseph answered sadly that he could not; he said he was in danger of losing everything. He had invested almost his entire property in wood in the Hagenau forest, and if Bourbaki and his army should force their way through, all would be lost over there as well as here.
These were certainly very gloomy prospects, and we could not get any comfort at home; we daily expected the advance of Bourbaki's army, and it was said that preparations were being made to lay the whole country waste.
My sister wrote that in Alsace it was the general belief that there would now be a change. Bourbaki would strike down Germany. Her husband had hung up the pictures and epaulettes again; but with this proviso, that if the French would not deliver them this time, he would have nothing further to do with them, and would become a forester in Germany.
Bertha had returned to the capital, and wrote that the Colonel, with whom Rothfuss had remained, was again at the head of his regiment in the division that opposed Bourbaki's advance towards the Rhine.
At home, I found another cause for deep emotion; it was a letter for me from Ernst. It had been forwarded from the field by the army post. The paper showed the traces of many tears. I was so much overcome, every time I read the letter, that my children took it away from me; but I asked them to return it, and here it is:
"Dear Father and Mother:--See me prostrate at your feet; what I desired to do a thousand times, and again and again postponed, I must now finish.
"I know that, both for you and for me, my deeds have filled many days and nights--nay, whole years--with sadness. I cannot express in words what I have thought and felt while on the march in the hot sun, or at night when I looked up to the stars that shone also on my paternal home. And, oh! how, when on the march and parched with thirst, I longed for a drop of water from our fountain. I write with burning tears, but they cannot blot out the past, nor recall a single wasted hour. Lost! lost! I repent, I suffer deeply. You often told me, mother, 'You must curb your spirit.' I could not succeed in my peaceful home, although I had so many to help me you, father, Martella, my brothers and sisters. From afar, the sound of ardent prayer swells into an eager wail for redemption. I have wasted all. Am I a sacrifice to my country's misery? And now comes the most dreadful consequence of my misdeeds. We have received orders to take ship to fight against Germany. No, not against Germany. The old misery is here again with redoubled force. An officer has confided to me, that several of the lesser German states had called upon France to release them from the tyranny of Prussia.
"I had loaded my gun and pointed it at my head, but, thinking of you, I fired into the air.
"Is it my guilt, or am I but a drop in the stream that overflows its bed?
"O my parents! He who leaves his country is suspended in mid-air, and has no ground to stand upon. It is well that the end is near; but I wish you to know that my soul is with you at home. At this moment, I feel your hands on my head, blessing me.
"May Martella remain forever true! I can say nothing to her. Oh, Richard was in the right. How dared I, who was nothing for myself, bind another life to mine?
"I thank you a thousand times for all the kindness, all the love you bestowed upon me who am unworthy of it, and upon Martella who deserves it.
"I beg forgiveness of my brothers and sisters for the wrongs I have done them.
"Do not mourn for me; I shall find the way to atonement. Console and comfort yourselves with the thought of one who will remember you till death.
"ERNST."