SCENE I
POLICE STATION, NEW YORK CITY. EVENING
Door C. Door L. 2nd E. leading below to cells. Windows in flat R. and L. showing two green lights in front of Station. Street backing, showing the other side of Street. Bench at L. window, chair at R. window. Small platform R. 2, with desk, railing, etc. Chairs on Platform.
AT RISE: (O'Mara at desk speaking through telephone. PERKINS in chair R., writing. FLYNN searching INBAD, who is intoxicated.)
O'MARA: (Speaking through 'phone.) All right! Good-bye! (Puts 'phone down.) Take him down, that fellow is a champion souse.
INBAD: (As FLYNN is jerking him off L.) Thatsh what I am, and I'll defend my title against all comers. (Exit INBAD followed by FLYNN.)
PERKINS: (Coming R. to O'MARA.) That Worthington robbery will make a corking story, if it's true. (Starts for door C.)
O'MARA: Well, why don't you wait till the pinch comes off and then get the story for sure?
PERKINS: Your word's good enough.
O'MARA: But I haven't given you me word. I don't know whether they've nailed him yet or not.
PERKINS: (Coming back to desk railing R.) (Disappointed.) Oh, I thought you said they'd got him.
O'MARA: That's the way you reporters twist everything. I said
"Dugan was after him," that's all.
PERKINS: Well, that's as good as got him; anything Dugan sets out to get, comes pretty near materializing. (Starts C., stops on meeting BROOKY, who enters door C.) Hello! Brooky! Just in time. Here's a chance for you to distinguish yourself in your new capacity.
BROOKY: (Coming C.) Got a story?
PERKINS: A pippin! Listen to this. (Reads from notes.) "Police fishing. Make a big haul! Throw out the dragnet and once more capture the Eel." A very slippery article.
BROOKY: I don't understand.
PERKINS: Oh, can't you understand, the Eel is the nickname, the alias of one of the slickest crooks in the country, Billy Bradley.
BROOKY: Billy Bradley? Oh yes, I've heard of him.
PERKINS: Well, that's the Eel.
BROOKY: Oh I see; well, what about him?
PERKINS: He's been taken, or at least is going to be.
BROOKY: What's he done?
PERKINS: (Looking at BROOKY surprised.) You're up on that Worthington robbery, aren't you?
BROOKY: What robbery is that?
PERKINS: (Disgusted.) Don't tell me you don't know that burglars entered Mrs. Demming Worthington's house last night, and made off with a five thousand dollar necklace?
BROOKY: I hadn't heard of it.
PERKINS: Good heavens, man! hasn't your paper got it?
BROOKY: (Going L.) I don't know. I never read our paper. (Perkins follows BROOKY in disgust.)
O'MARA: (Smiling.) Well, I don't know but what you're just as well off. (Enter INSPECTOR door C., O'MARA comes from behind desk and stands above it for INSPECTOR to cross him.)
PERKINS: Good evenin', Inspector.
INSPECTOR: (Glancing about room, without stopping, goes straight to stool behind desk.) How are you, boys! (INSPECTOR salutes O'MARA as he passes him, O'MARA returns the salute, then goes to upper end of desk, where he stands.)
BROOKY: How do you do, sir.
INSPECTOR: (Back of desk.) Well, O'Mara. They've got the Eel.
O'MARA: They have?
INSPECTOR: Dugan is on his way up with him now.
PERKINS: I guess it will go pretty hard with him, won't it Inspector?
INSPECTOR: If he is guilty.
PERKINS: Well, he is, isn't he?
INSPECTOR: I believe every man innocent until proven guilty.
BROOKY: Bravo, Inspector! Those are my sentiments.
INSPECTOR: I've sent for Mrs. Worthington. When we get her, Goldie, the Eel and Dugan together, we shall be able to get a clearer view on the matter. Bring up Goldie. (O'MARA exits door L.)
PERKINS: (Coming R. C.) Inspector, has this girl Goldie Marshall ever been up before?
INSPECTOR: Well, she's been arrested a number of times, on shop-lifting charges, but we've never been able to prove anything on her.
PERKINS: Perhaps she's square after all.
INSPECTOR: Not at all unlikely; as I said before, I believe a person innocent until proven guilty.
BROOKY: (Crossing R. to railing of desk.) And as I said before—Bravo, old chap. (The INSPECTOR looks at BROOKY sternly and he retires up stage R. confusedly, bumping into chair, sits in it.)
PERKINS: (Crossing R. to railing.) Inspector?
INSPECTOR: Well?
PERKINS: I suppose many a person has been railroaded through the
System?
INSPECTOR: (Rising angrily.) System! How dare you! What do you mean?
PERKINS: I—I—beg your pardon, Inspector, I—
BROOKY: (Rising from chair and coming down L. of PERKINS.)
I say, don't make a bally ass of yourself.
INSPECTOR: Don't ever let me hear you say that again. (Voices of
O'MARA and GOLDIE are heard off L.) (Enter GOLDIE, followed by
O'MARA. Door L.)
GOLDIE: (Jerking away from O'MARA.) Well, don't yank my arm off.
(Looking around room.) I know the way. (Starts R.)
O'MARA: (Following GOLDIE, catches her by the back of neck as she reaches C.) Don't give me any back talk or I'll yank your neck off.
INSPECTOR: O'Mara! let go your hold. Don't forget you're dealing with a woman. (O'MARA releases hold.)
GOLDIE: (Mockingly courteous.) Thanks, Inspector! What'll I send you for Christmas, a bunch of sweet forget-me-nots or a barrel of pickles?
INSPECTOR: Goldie, don't be so incorrigible.
GOLDIE: Gee! but you're an educated guy.
INSPECTOR: Have a seat. (O'MARA jumps for chair with mock politeness.)
GOLDIE: (To reporters.) He's polite, too. (Crosses to chair.)
INSPECTOR: Well, Goldie!
GOLDIE: (Sitting.) Well, Inspector!
INSPECTOR: Do you intend to stay here to-night or are you going to get bail?
GOLDIE: Where would I get bail?
INSPECTOR: I thought perhaps some gentleman friend of yours—
GOLDIE: (Rising angrily.) I ain't got no gentlemen friends. What do you think I am, a Moll? (Sits.)
INSPECTOR: Don't make any grand stand play now, Goldie!
GOLDIE: Well, if you mean that I'm a bad girl, you'd better not say it (Rising, crosses to desk and pounds angrily on railing.), 'cause I ain't, see?
INSPECTOR: Well, you don't deny that you and the Eel are sweethearts?
GOLDIE: Was, yes. Gee, we was goin' to get married, until in a jealous huff he tried to kill me and was shipped for two years for assault and battery, but it wasn't none of my doin's.
INSPECTOR: Didn't you prefer charges against him?
GOLDIE: I did not. Do you think I'd squeal on a pal? If it wasn't for Dugan, they'd turn the Eel loose. (Sits.)
INSPECTOR: Why Dugan?
GOLDIE: Didn't he shove him in?
INSPECTOR: He was simply acting in his official duty.
GOLDIE: Official duty, my eye.
INSPECTOR: What other motive could Mr. Dugan possibly have had?
GOLDIE: (With a sneer.) Maybe you don't know. Well, I'll tell you. He thought by shovin' the Eel out of the way, he could get me.
INSPECTOR: And did he?
GOLDIE: Not so as you could notice it. I ain't no fall guy for nobody.
INSPECTOR: Now that the Eel's been sprung, are you going back to him?
GOLDIE: (Almost in tears.) Oh gee! I wish I could, but there's nothing doin', he's sore on me.
INSPECTOR: When did you last see him?
GOLDIE: Just before he went up, two years ago.
INSPECTOR: How about this Worthington robbery, wasn't he in on it?
GOLDIE: (Hastily.) No, he wasn't.
INSPECTOR: (Quickly.) Who was?
GOLDIE: (After a slight pause as though to confess.) Well, I'll tell you. There was three of us, me, Jesse James, and Christopher Columbus. (Looks first at INSPECTOR then to PERKINS.) Ah, put it down on your little yellow paper.
INSPECTOR: (Angrily.) Answers like that'll get you nothing here.
GOLDIE: See, you won't believe me when I tell you.
INSPECTOR: Silence, I say! (To O'MARA.) Take her down. (GOLDIE rises from chair leisurely and strolls impudently L. as she comes to BROOKY.) Oh, poo! poo!
INSPECTOR: (Stopping GOLDIE at door L.) And you'll stay down unless you have a confession to make.
GOLDIE: (At door L.) Say, Inspector, if you're waitin' for a confession from me, you'll wait until pigs fly kites. (Exit door L. GOLDIE followed by O'MARA.) (PERKINS and BROOKY look off after them.)
BROOKY: What a little terror!
PERKINS: Looks mighty like her work, doesn't it, Inspector?
INSPECTOR: No! The job has all the ear marks of the Eel, but she undoubtedly is his accomplice. (Enter MRS. WORTHINGTON door C., she looks around uncomfortably and as she comes down C., BROOKY and PERKINS on seeing her, remove their hats. INSPECTOR rises and indicates chair R. C.) Ah! Mrs. Worthington! (Indicating Reporters.) Have you any objection to talking for publication?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: (Looking toward Reports.) No, not at all. (PERKINS has note paper and takes down as she talks.)
INSPECTOR: Will you kindly be seated? And we shall proceed? (MRS.
W. sits.) Now in the first place, how long had this girl, Goldie
Marshall, been in your employ?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: Just one week.
INSPECTOR: (Half aside.) That's about the time the Eel was sprung. (To Mrs. W.) Had you missed anything else up to the time of this robbery?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: No, nothing.
INSPECTOR: Who else was in the house at the time, besides yourself and the maid?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: Only my guests who were at dinner with me. Mr.
Appleby and his wife.
INSPECTOR: The horseowner?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: Yes, and a Miss Hazelton from Pittsburgh.
INSPECTOR: Would you suspect them?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: Well, hardly.
INSPECTOR: Anyone else?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: Yes, Mr. Dugan.
INSPECTOR: What Dugan?
MRS. WORTHINGTON: Why, your Mr. Dugan here.
INSPECTOR: Oh, Tim Dugan.
MRS. WORTHINGTON: Yes, we're great friends, and he frequently dines at my house. (Low murmur begins in the distance and grows louder. MRS. W. rises in fear and appeals to the INSPECTOR, who comes from behind the desk and—)
INSPECTOR: Don't be alarmed, Mrs. Worthington, just step behind the desk. (MRS. WORTHINGTON steps back of desk and sits in chair below stool. INSPECTOR replaces the chair in which MRS. W. has been sitting in front of the window R. C. then returns to back of desk where he stands. The REPORTERS at first sound show excitement, PERKINS goes to door C. and looks off R. B.)
PERKINS: (At door C.) It's Dugan and he's got the Eel. (Goes down L. C.) (DUGAN is seen out of window R. bringing the EEL along, who is hand-cuffed. They are followed by a noisy crowd. DUGAN throws the EEL down, C., then chases the crowd away from door C.)
EEL: (Looks around smiling until he sees INSPECTOR.) Hello, Inspector! Gee! it's real oil for the wicks of my lamps to see you again.
DUGAN: (Coming down C.) Yes, he's tickled to death to see you, ain't you, Billy?
EEL: (Angrily.) The Eel to you, Copper; Billy to my pals.
INSPECTOR: Well, Billy!
EEL: That's right, Inspector, you're my pal. (Movement from INSPECTOR.) Oh, I ain't forgot when you was just a plain Bull and saved me from doin' my first bit on a phoney charge. They tried to railroad me, you remember, and Dugan here was runnin' the engine.
INSPECTOR: Oh, you've got Dugan wrong, Billy, he bears you no malice.
EEL: No, it's a mistake, he just loves me. Say, he thinks so much of me, that if he saw me drowning, he'd bring me a glass of water.
DUGAN: You know why you were brought here?
EEL: Sure, so's you could railroad me again.
INSPECTOR: Nonsense, Dugan has nothing against you personally.
EEL: Oh yes he has; when he was new on the force, I beat him up good. He was only a harness cop then, and one night he thought he made me coppin' a super from a lush, which you know ain't my graft. He started to fan me with a sap, so I just clubbed my smoke wagon, and before I got through with him, I made him a pick-up for the ambulance, and he ain't never forgot it.
INSPECTOR: What do you know about this Worthington robbery? (EEL looks around suspiciously.) Before you answer, Billy, I warn you to be careful, everything you say will be used against you.
EEL: Yes, and everything I don't say will be used, too. I know the system.
DUGAN: (Crossing R. to EEL. REPORTERS follow.) Well, what have you got to say?
EEL: (Taking time, looks around.) You don't think I'm goin' to address this Mass Meeting here. (BROOKY looks L. to see if there is anyone else there.)
INSPECTOR: You're not afraid to talk in front of a couple of newspaper reporters, are you?
EEL: (Grinning at INSPECTOR to gain time.) Roosevelt gets a dollar a word, where do I come in? (Resignedly.) All right, flag the pencil pushers and I'll gab my nob. (DUGAN turns L. to tell the REPORTERS to go. BROOKY says he don't understand. PERKINS pulls him off door C., remonstrating, going R.) (The INSPECTOR signs to DUGAN that they will now grill the EEL.)
INSPECTOR: This lady I suppose you know.
EEL: (Looks at MRS. WORTHINGTON.) I never lamped her before in my life.
DUGAN: That is Mrs. Worthington, the lady you robbed.
EEL: (Banteringly to MRS. WORTHINGTON to gain time.) Is it? How do you do, pleased to meet you. Gee! but you must be an awful mark to be robbed. (INSPECTOR raps on desk.) What was it I stole from you, Mrs. Worthington?
DUGAN: Nix on that bull. You know what you stole.
EEL: Yes, and I suppose you know what I stole before I stole it.
DUGAN: With dips like you, I always look far ahead.
EEL: Get out! you couldn't look far enough ahead to see the ashes on your cigar. Why, if it wasn't for your stool pigeons—
DUGAN: That's enough out of you.
EEL: Oh, go chase yourself. (DUGAN smashes at EEL, who ducks around back of him.)
INSPECTOR: Dugan!!! (When Dugan locates the EEL, he goes after him again. MRS. WORTHINGTON screams.)
INSPECTOR: None of that, Dugan! Remember, he had no marks on him when you brought him in. (DUGAN crosses L. in front of EEL and looks off door L. in subdued rage.) A little more civility out of you, Bradley.
EEL: All right, Inspector. (To MRS. W.) I beg your pardon, lady.
INSPECTOR: You have been brought here as a suspect in a five thousand dollar jewelry theft which happened at the home of Mrs. Worthington last night. (EEL makes no move.) Circumstances point strongly in your direction. Your former sweetheart, Goldie Marshall, was serving as maid to Mrs. Worthington at the time of the robbery.
EEL: And you think I planted her there as a stall.
DUGAN: Goldie spilled that much, and we didn't, have to third degree her.
EEL: So Goldie declared me in on this?
INSPECTOR: She couldn't help it, we knew it was a two-man's job.
EEL: She snitched me into a frame-up.
DUGAN: Same as she did two years ago.
EEL: Why say, Inspector, I ain't seen Goldie since I was sprung from the Pen.
DUGAN: Is that so? I got it straight that the first place you mozied to was Goldie's flat on East Broadway. You were trailed.
EEL: Sure I was, by one of you pathfinders at the Central Office.
Oh, I've played tag with you before; Dugan, whatever you say, is.
INSPECTOR: Then you admit—
EEL: I don't admit nothin'.
INSPECTOR: Be careful what you say. Have you retained counsel?
EEL: A mouthpiece! What for?
INSPECTOR: You've got to be represented. Have you any money?
EEL: Sure! I left the hotel of Zebra clothed with a pocket full of smiles and a wad of joy. (INSPECTOR whispers for O'MARA to bring up GOLDIE. O'MARA exits door L.)
INSPECTOR: Well, the state will furnish you with an attorney.
EEL: What, one of them record shysters? Eighty years old and never won a case. No, thanks, Inspector. I'll plead my own case; then I got at least a chance to beat this rap.
DUGAN: You'd have a swell time pleading your own case.
EEL: Yes, and believe me I'll spring a sensation when I open up. I'll show up some of this rotten graft. I'll bust "The System " to smithereens. Dugan, I won't be railroaded—(EEL crosses in rage L. to Dugan.)
INSPECTOR: Bradley! hold your tongue, you've said enough.
EEL: I ain't said half what I'm going to say—
INSPECTOR: (Fiercely.) Not another word out of you. Do you understand?
EEL: (Coming down.) All right, Inspector. I don't want to get anybody that's right, in bad, but I've got something up my sleeve. (DUGAN laughs and goes up stage.) (GOLDIE enters door L. brought in by O'MARA. She is startled at seeing EEL, then pleadingly:)
GOLDIE: Billy! (EEL turns and is about to go to GOLDIE but stops.)
EEL: You snitched again! You snitched again! (Running L. to GOLDIE with arms up as though to hit her with hand-cuffs. GOLDIE snatches his upraised arms.)
GOLDIE: Oh no, Billy! True as God I didn't!
DUGAN: (Aside to INSPECTOR.) Let's leave them alone, they'll talk.
(MRS. WORTHINGTON, INSPECTOR, DUGAN and O'MARA exit door R.)
GOLDIE: (Still holding EEL'S arms.) Why, I'd rather die than snitch.
EEL: (Jerking away and going R.) How about two years ago?
GOLDIE: I didn't even then when you left me dying. They framed you while I was in the hospital.
EEL: Who?
GOLDIE: Dugan and his—
EEL: Sh!!! Oh if I could only believe you, kid.
GOLDIE: Look at me, Billy. Do you think I'd snitch?
EEL: (Looks at her, then pushes her head roughly back.) No, I can't believe you did it, kid. (EEL takes GOLDIE in his arms.)
GOLDIE: (Sobbingly.) I'm so glad to see you again.
EEL: Me, too, kid. Gee, your head feels as natural on my shoulder as a piece of pie on a prize-fighter's knife. (EEL takes GOLDIE from his shoulder and says inquiringly.) But what are you doing here?
GOLDIE: (Drying her tears.) Bein' held on suspicion, but they can't get met I'm protected. Dugan's got to—
EEL: Nix on the crackin', don't shoot your trap, they're leavin' us together for a stall. Talk about something else. (EEL turns R. and GOLDIE grabs his hand.) Do you still love me?
GOLDIE: Always.
EEL: Will you marry me?
GOLDIE: If you want me to.
EEL: You know I do. (Looks around suspiciously.) Say, if I beat this rap (DUGAN comes, on door R., and stands at upper end of desk), let's get spliced and go out West, turn over a new leaf, and begin life all over again, far away from the subway world where the sun of happiness is always clouded and the ace of joy is coppered. What do you say?
GOLDIE: Gee! them's the kindest words you've ever said to me. (Then lightly.) And I'll march down the aisle with you, with my hair in a braid.
EEL: Great!! Gee, I wonder if we could make our get-away now. (Both start for door C., but DUGAN, who has come down behind them, stops them.)
DUGAN: How do you do! Would you like to take a little trip out in the air with me?
GOLDIE: Say, I'd rather be home with the headache, than at the
Movies with a guy like you. (Crosses L.) (INSPECTOR enters door
R. going behind desk.)
INSPECTOR: Well, have you got anything to say to me before I lock you up for the night?
EEL: Nothin', except that it's a frame-up, and we defy you to go through with it.
INSPECTOR: Take 'em down.
DUGAN: (Above door L.) Come on. (EEL starts for door L.)
GOLDIE: Good-night, Inspector.
INSPECTOR: Good-night.
EEL: (Turning at door L.) Same from me, Inspector.
INSPECTOR: Good-night, Bradley. (DUGAN shoves the EEL roughly off.
GOLDIE circles around and switches in front of DUGAN.) By the way,
Goldie, what's the number of your flat on East Broadway?
GOLDIE: (Hesitatingly at door L.) 327, Inspector.
INSPECTOR: Thanks.
GOLDIE: (Impudently.) You're welcome. (Exit door L. followed by
DUGAN.) (O'MARA locks door after them.)
INSPECTOR: (Calling O'MARA.) O'Mara!
O'MARA: (At door L.) Yes, sir.
INSPECTOR: I want a wire installed at 327 East Broadway.
O'MARA: (In front of desk.) Goldie's flat?
INSPECTOR: Yes. I'm leaving it to you to see that the orders are carried out to the letter.
O'MARA: Yes, sir, to-morrow.
INSPECTOR: To-night, at once. I'm going to turn them loose. You understand?
O'MARA: (Looks puzzled, then face brightens.) I understand.