The triumph of the nut, and other parodies

by Christopher Ward

I

“The moon—their tutelary orb——”

“Tutelary orb! Oh, dear!” groaned Nick. “Why don’t you say ‘chaste goddess of the night!’ ‘sweet regent of the heavens!’ ‘queen and huntress, chaste and fair!’ or something new like that? This is modern English prose, my dear Susy. Here, let me have the typewriter. I’ll show you how.”