Our Show / A Humorous Account of the International Exposition in Honor of the Centennial Anniversary of American Independence, from Inception to Completion, Including Description of Buildings, Biographies of Managers, Receptions of Foreign Dignitaries, Opening Ceremonies, Poem, Oration, Amusing Survey of All Departments, Incidents, Etc., Etc.

by David Solis Cohen; H. B. Sommer

UNITED STATES GOVERNMENT

decided to erect a few buildings, including a hospital. They thought the latter might come handy in Washington after the exhibition, for resigning officials. When we first learned that the United States had obtained 100,000 feet for their buildings, we thought it another display of persevering frugality. We imagined they desired to save a hardware bill by using the nails accompanying the material. We discovered that the feet merely meant the ground for the buildings to stand on.

As the Grecian government had expressed itself too poor to take part in the Exposition, Mr. Windrim, the architect, was instructed to design these buildings in the shape of a Greek cross. Through this delicate A COMPLIMENT
TO SAPPHO.compliment, the land where Sappho lived and sung, was represented after all.

These, with the offices for managers, gas men, stage carpenters, etc. etc., and some national, state, and special buildings, which may claim our attention further on, complete the list of structures erected upon the Centennial grounds for exhibition purposes. Men of all nationalities vied for the privilege of taking part in the glorious work. The Teuton and Celt underbid the native American; the co-patriots of Garibaldi did still better, only to be put to shame in their turn by a Chinese colony. Ignoring all natural partiality and national prejudice, the contractors, in a spirit of true republicanism, gave the most work to those who labored for the least money.

CHAPTER II.
“THE FUEL.”... What the women did.

Nature always provides for emergencies. The world required steamboats and locomotives, and, lo! a Fulton and a Stephenson appeared to supply the demand. We craved a means of rapid intercommunication, and Mr. Morse sat down and invented his telegraph. We experienced a soaring desire to sail through the air, and George Francis Train stepped forward to inflate our balloons. So, when a lady competent to organize and superintend the workings of her sisters, became requisite to the success of the Centennial project, nature did not desert us. Uprose, as the poet sweetly remarks,LOVELY
WOMAN.

“A perfect woman, nobly planned
To boss an army or a peanut stand,”

and grasping the banner, Mrs. Emma D.E.N. Gillespie became the special partner of the Board of Finance.

Were we about writing a work in twenty quarto volumes, the kind we have been in the habit of producing, we might faintly hope to do justice to the prodigies accomplished by the noble women of America, and especially by our own Philadelphia ladies. What we do write, however, is the result of personal observation. Blessed with female relatives in esse and in posse, who have been active members of ward committees since the first trumpet tone, we write advisedly; having been snubbed, sacrificed, and made secondary to centennial enthusiasm for three long years, we write with a proper appreciation of the solemn duty in hand.

The dear creatures travelled up to the State-House steeple; they glanced around upon the situation; they rolled up their sleeves, metaphorically, and swooped down upon the city. They canvassed stores and factories from turret to foundation stone; they invaded dingy counting-houses, and sauntered like sunbeams into dusty offices, collecting subscriptions to centennial stock, peddling centennial medals, and doing irreparable damage to the peace of simpering clerks, blushing salesmen, and susceptible employers. A single case will serve for illustration. Listen to the story of