Part II.
There was a young woman servant to Tom’s father, which Tom had offended by some of his tricks, and she to be up with him again; one night spread a handfull of short nettles in his bed, between his sheets; which stinged his legs and thighs so much, that he was obliged to quit his bed, for some part of the night; for which he resolved to be revenged when ever a proper opportunity offered. It happened in a few days after that she was invited to a wedding where the dancing and diversion induced her to stay all night; and on coming home in the morning, her mistress set her to wash some cloaths. But she being fatigued with her night’s diversion, and for want of rest fell fast asleep with her hand extended in the tub, and standing on her feet with her belly leaning on the tub, Tom perceiving this, slips her petticoats and smock over her head, letting the sun shine on her bare back side, which faced the highway. Several people passing by while she continued in this posture, some of them were diverted, and others ashamed at the sight. But a poor cadger had the misfortune to be coming on the road at the time, and his horse taking fright at this unusual sight, threw off the creels which broke the poor man’s eggs all to smash. Which so enraged him, that he lashed her buttocks with his whip in so unmerciful a manner, that with the smart and shame together, she had not the least inclination to sleep for the remaining part of the day.[56]
Tom being grown up to the years and age of a man, thought himself more wiser and slyer than his father; and there was several things about the house he liked better than to work: so he turned to be a dealer amongst the brutes, a couper of horses and cows, &c. and even wet ware amongst brewers and brandy shops; until he couped himself to the toom halter; and then his parents would supply him no more. He knew well his grandmother had plenty of mony, but she would give him none; but the old woman had a good black calf her own, which Tom went to the fields one evening and catches and takes her into an old waste house which stood at a distance from any other, and there he kept her two or three days, giving her meat and drink when it was dark at night, and made the old woman believe some body had stole the cow for their winter mairt:[57] which was grief enough to the old woman, for the loss of her dearly beloved cow. However, she employs Tom to go to a fair that was near by, to buy her another, gives him 3 lr[58] which Tom accept of very thankfulli and promised to buy one as like the other as possibly he could get; then he gets a piece of chalk and brays it small as meal, and steeps it in a little water, and therewith rubs over the cow’s face and back which made her both brocket and rigget: So Tom in the morning takes the cow to a public house within a little of the fair, and there left her till the fair was over, and then drives her home before him; and as soon as they came home the cow began to rout as she used to do, which made the old woman so rejoice, thinking it was her own black cow; but when she saw her white face, sighed and said, “Alas! thou’ll never be like the kindly brute my black lady, and yet routs as like her as ony I ever did hear;” but Tom says to himself, the mercy is you know not what she says, or all would be wrong yet. So in two or three days the old woman put forth her bra’ rigget cow in the morning with the rest of the neighbours cattle, but it came on a sore day of heavy rain, which washed away all the white from her face and back: so the old woman’s black lady came home at night, and her rigget cow went away with the shower and was never heard of. But Tom’s father having some suspicion, and looking narrowly into the cows face, found some of the chalk not washed away; and then he gave poor Tom a hearty beating, and sent him away to seek his fortune with a skin full of sore bones.