THE TOMB OF COLONEL HESSING.
15th.—This beautiful Mausoleum is in the Catholic burial ground at Agra, and is well worthy a visit. It was built by a native architect, by name Luteef, in imitation of the ancient Muhammadan tombs. The material is the red stone from Fathīpoor Sicri, which is highly carved, but not inlaid. The tomb is beautiful, very beautiful, and in excellent taste. Its cost is estimated at about one lākh of rupees. Luteef’s drawings of the Tāj and of all the ancient monuments around Agra are excellent; they cost from three to forty rupees each. I bought a large collection of them, as well as of marbles and other curiosities. Luteef inlays marble with precious stones, after the style of the work in the Tāj. A chess-table of this sort, with a border of flowers in mosaic, costs from eight to twelve hundred rupees, £80, or £120, and is beautifully executed.
16th.—My affairs at Agra having come to a conclusion, and the pinnace, carriage, and horses being on their way home, I once more turned my steps to Khāsgunge, and arrived there dāk, accompanied by a friend, who was extremely anxious to see the marriage ceremony, although all that the eye of a man is permitted to behold is the tamāshā that takes place without the four walls. All that passes within is sacred.
On my arrival the whole party at Khāsgunge were going out to tents by the Ganges to hunt wild boars and otters; to shoot crocodiles, floriken, black partridge, and other game. Even for people in good health it was, at that season of the year, a mad expedition, and I declined going; I longed indeed to accompany them, but my cold and cough were so severe I was forced to give up the idea.
18th.—My dear Colonel Gardner, seeing how ill I was, said, “You will never recover, my child, in the outer house; I will give you a room in the inner one, and put you under the care of the begam; there you will soon recover.” He took me over to the zenāna; the begam received me very kindly, and appointed four of her slaves to attend upon me, and aid my own women. They put me immediately into a steam-bath, shampooed, mulled, and half-boiled me; cracked every joint after the most approved fashion, took me out, laid me on a golden-footed bed, gave me sherbet to drink, shampooed me to sleep, and by the time the shooting party returned from the Gunga, I had perfectly recovered, and was able to enter into all the amusement of seeing a Hindostanee wedding.
I must here anticipate, and remark that Suddu Khan, our excellent little khānsāmān, died in June, 1841. He had been ill and unable to attend for months. There is a story, that being in an hummām, he received some injury in the spine while being shampooed and joint-cracked by a barber, who placed his knee to his back, and then forcibly brought his two arms backwards. The story says poor Suddu fainted, and the barber was so much alarmed, he fled, and has never been seen since at Cawnpore, where the scene took place.
CHAPTER XXXVI.
THE MARRIAGE.
“TO DRESS ONE’S OWN DOLL[144].”
Spoken of a father who defrays the whole expense of his daughter’s marriage, her dress, ornaments, &c., without any charge to the bridegroom or his family.
“HE WHO BUILDS A HOUSE AND TAKES A WIFE HEAPS SEVENTY AFFLICTIONS ON HIS HEAD[145].”
Pedigree of the Bride and Bridegroom—Reports concerning the Beauty of the Bride—Anxiety of English Gentlemen to marry into Colonel Gardner’s family—Mirza Unjun Shekō—The first Procession—The Bride’s Dress—Necessity of Weeping—The Oily Mixture—Strict Seclusion—Dress of the Bridegroom—The Oily Mixture Complimentary—The Hoolī—Bridal Songs—The Sāchak—The Bridegroom’s Procession—Nāch Girls on platforms—The Menhdi—The grand Display in the Bride’s Procession—The Parda—The Prince dyed with hinnā—Midnight the fashionable hour for Dinner—Wedding Dishes—Silvered Food—Conclusion of the Day—Mr. James Gardner—Mulka Begam highly respected; her will is law.
1835, March 18th.—Before entering on a description of the marriage ceremonies, it may be as well to explain the singular manner in which Colonel Gardner’s family has intermarried with that of the Emperor of Delhi, which the annexed pedigree will exemplify.
William Gardner, Esq., of Coleraine, left a son.
William Gardner, Esq., Lieut.-Colonel in the 11th regiment of Dragoons. He married Elizabeth, daughter of Valentine Farrington, Esq., and had issue Valentine, born 1739, Allan, and other children. Allan was created a baronet, and afterwards elevated to the peerage in Ireland in 1800; and created a peer of the United Kingdom, 1806.
Pedigree of Colⁿ. William Linnæus Gardner.
فاني پارکس
Valentine, the eldest son, a Major in the army, married, first, Alaida, daughter of Robert Livingstone, Esq., by whom he had a son, William Linnæus, Captain in the army; and, secondly, Frances, daughter of Samuel Holworthy, Esq., by whom he had another son, Valentine.
Colonel William Linnæus Gardner married Nawab Matmunzel-ool-Nissa Begam Delme, and by her had two sons, Allan and James, and a daughter; the last mentioned died young.
Allan, the eldest son, married Beebee Sāhiba Hinga, and left one son, Mungo, who died young, and two daughters, Hirmoozee and Susan. Hirmoozee married her relative, Stewart William Gardner, Esq., son of Rear-Admiral Francis Gardner, the brother of Allan Hyde Lord Gardner. Susan, the second daughter, or Shubbeah Begam as she is called, is the one whose marriage is on the tapis.
James Gardner, the second son of Colonel William Linnæus Gardner, married, first, Beebee Sāhiba Banoo, by whom he had one son, Hinga, and two daughters, Alaida, the Morning Star, and the Evening Star. He married, secondly, Mulka Humanee Begam, and by her had four children, two sons and two daughters: Sulimān and William Linnæus; Nashaba Begam, and another girl.
Mirza Sulimān Shekō, son of Shāh Allum, the late Emperor of Delhi, and brother of Akbar Shāh, the present Emperor, has a numerous family. Two of the daughters were celebrated for their beauty: one of them, Mulka Humanee Begam, married her cousin, Mirza Selīm, the son of Akbar Shāh, from whom she was divorced: she married, secondly, Mr. James Gardner. Sultana Bōa, the other daughter, married Nusseer-ood-Deen Hydur, the King of Oude. Mirza Unjun Shekō, son of Mirza Suliman Shekō, and half-brother of Mulka Begam, is engaged to Susan Gardner, as before-mentioned.
Colonel Gardner was exceedingly unwilling to allow of the marriage of his grand-daughter with the young prince, but the old Begam, his wife, had set her heart upon it. He would rather have seen her married to a European gentleman; but the Begam, who is an adopted daughter of the Emperor of Delhi, is delighted with the match,—in her eyes a fine alliance.
I must describe the bride, Susan Gardner, or, as she is called in the zenāna, Shubbeah Begam, every lady having her name and title also. She had been cried up by the people at Agra as a great beauty, and Colonel Gardner had received several proposals for her, both from European and native gentlemen. She was also described as very accomplished for the inhabitant of four walls, being able to read, and write, and keep accounts with gram. She is about twenty years of age, very old for a bride in this country, where girls marry at eleven or twelve, and the proverb describes them as “shrivelled at twenty.”
My surprise was great when I saw her in the zenāna. Her complexion is pale and sallow, her face flat, her figure extremely thin, and far from pretty. Her flatterers called her “so fair!” but she has not the fairness of a European, or the fine clear brown of some Asiatic ladies: her manners were also admired, but I did not like them, nor did she move stately as an elephant, an epithet applied to a woman having a graceful gait.
Unjun Shekō, the bridegroom, who is about twenty years of age, is a remarkably handsome man; his black curling hair hangs in long locks on each side his face; his eyes very large, long, and bright; his features fine; his complexion a clear brown; his figure the middle size; and like all natives, he wore a beard, moustache, and whiskers. His three brothers, who came to the wedding with him, are ugly, low caste looking men. Unjun’s manners are good, theirs are cubbish. For four or five years he has been trying to bring about this marriage; but Colonel Gardner opposed it on account of his extravagance. His father, Sulimān Shekō, has refused to give one rupee to the young couple, so that the whole expense of the wedding falls upon Colonel Gardner: he pays for both sides. The young prince has only an allowance of 100 rupees a month! Natives, especially native women, are curious beings; the whole pride of their lives consists in having had a grand wedding: they talk of it, and boast of it to the hour of their death. Colonel Gardner said, “If I were to give Shubbeah the money that will be fooled away in display at this marriage, I should make her miserable; she would think herself disgraced; and although by custom she is not allowed to stir from her room, or to see the sight, still it will charm her to hear the road was lighted up for so many miles, the fireworks were so fine and the procession so grand! She would have this to talk of in preference to the money, even if she were forced to deprive herself of half her food all her life; she is a pakkā Hindostānee!” They were horrified at my description of an English marriage. A carriage and four, attended by five or six other carriages, made a good wedding; when the ceremony had been performed by the padre, the bride and bridegroom drove away: no procession, no fireworks; the money put in the banker’s hands, the parents gave a dinner and ball, and all was finished.
The Begam was in a perfect agony from morning till night, lest any one thing should be forgotten,—lest any, even the smallest gift might be omitted; if it were, the people would say, “What a shabby wedding!” and, in spite of all the expense, she would lose her good name.
It would be utterly impossible for me to recount the innumerable ceremonies performed at the wedding of a Muhammadan; the following are a few of the most remarkable.
March 12th.—The ceremonies began: In the first place, the bridegroom’s party, consisting of Mr. James Gardner, Mulka Began, Mrs. B⸺, and Mr. V⸺, went into tents four miles distant; while the bride’s party, consisting of Colonel Gardner, his Begam, the bride, and myself, remained at Khāsgunge. We had also, in the outer house, Mr. Valentine Gardner, a party of English gentlemen, and the old Nawab of Cambay. It appeared curious to me to sit down to dinner with these gentlemen, who were all attired in native dresses, and do the honours, at times when my dear Colonel Gardner was too unwell to quit the zenāna, and join the dinner party in the outer house. The turban is not a necessary appendage to Asiatic attire; in all friendly or familiar intercourse the skull cap is worn,—the turban in company; it is disgraceful to uncover the head.
But to return to my story. About 3 P.M., Mulka Begam came in procession to bring the bride’s dress, which is a present from the bridegroom. The procession consisted of elephants, raths (four-wheeled native carriages drawn by bullocks), palanquins, led horses, &c.; and one hundred trays, carried on men’s heads, containing the dress for the bride, sweetmeats, and basun (flour of gram), wherewith to wash the lady. Mulka Begam came in a covered palanquin, screened from the gaze of men.
I, as in duty bound, had made my salām to Shubbeah Begam, and was in attendance in the zenāna, to receive the bridegroom’s party.
“Women of the lower class, on entering the female assembly, must not say ‘salām;’ if the hostess be a lady of rank, they perform kudumbosee (the ceremony of kissing the feet) to her, and merely make salām to the rest. When going away they request permission, in the same way as the men in the male assembly, and take their departure.
“Kudumbosee, or the ceremony of kissing the feet, is, rather, to touch the feet of the hostess with the right hand, and then kiss the latter, or, more generally, make salām with it; while her ladyship, scarce allowing it to be done, out of politeness and condescension, withdraws her foot; and, taking hold of her hands, says, ‘Nay, don’t do that!’ or ‘Enough!’ ‘Long may you live!’ ‘Come, be seated!’ Or, if she be married, ‘May God render your sohag durable!’ i.e. May God preserve your husband: if he be dead, ‘May God cause your end to be happy!’
“The men of the better ranks of society, however, when coming in or going away, say, ‘Salām, bundugee tuslemat!’ i.e. ‘My blessing, service, or salutation to you!’ according to the rank of the lady of the house.
“The salām made by females is not like that of the males—touching the forehead with the right hand—but it consists in touching the puttee, or hair above the right temple[146].”
Speaking of men entering a zenāna, the place is considered so sacred, that, in a native family, only the nearest male relatives, the father and grandfather, can unrestrainedly obtain admission; the uncles and brothers only on especial occasions. The bride was once allowed to be seen by the brothers of Mirza Selīm, her betrothed husband; but he requested that no other persons but Colonel and Mr. James Gardner might behold her, and said, after marriage, he should not allow her to be seen even by his own brothers.
The trays containing the presents, brought in procession from the Prince, were received by the female slaves, conveyed by them into the zenāna, and placed before Colonel Gardner’s Begam and the Princess Mulka. It is a custom never to send back an empty tray; if money be not sent, part of the contents of the tray is left, fruit, flowers, &c. The presents were displayed on the ground before the bride, who was sitting on a charpāī, wrapped in an Indian shawl, hiding her face, and sobbing violently; I thought she was really in distress, but found this violent sorrow was only a part of the ceremony. Mulka Begam took a silver bowl, and putting into it sandal-wood powder and turmeric and oil, mixed it up, whilst both she and Colonel Gardner’s Begam repeated with great care the names and titles on both sides; it being unlucky if any name be forgotten, as any evil that may chance to befall the bride hereafter would be occasioned by forgetfulness, or mistaking the name over this oily mixture. The bride was then rubbed from head to foot with it; how yellow it made her, the turmeric! The natives say it makes the skin so beautiful, so yellow, and so soft: it certainly renders the skin deliciously soft, but the yellow tinge I cannot admire. After this operation was performed, all the mixture was scraped up, put into the bowl, and mixed with more oil, to be sent to the Prince, that his body might be rubbed with it—this is considered a compliment!
The bridal dress was then put on Shubbeah; it was of yellow gauze, trimmed with silver; the pajamas of red satin and silver. The faces of the attendants were smeared by way of frolic with the oily mixture, and the bridegroom’s party returned to their tents. I must not forget to mention that from the moment the bride is rubbed with this turmeric, she is a prisoner for ten days; not allowed to move from her charpāī, on which she sits up or sleeps. Twice a day she is rubbed with almond soap, mixed with turmeric, &c. All this time she is never allowed to bathe. She is fed on sweetmeats, and not allowed to touch acids, or vinegar, &c.: even pān is almost denied; but I fancy, without it an Asiatic lady would fret herself to death. And in this horrible state, a girl is kept during all the gaiety of the wedding; never allowed to move; to make her skin soft and yellow, and to render her sweet-tempered, I suppose, by feeding her with lumps of sugar!
As soon as the bridegroom’s party were gone, Colonel Gardner requested me to go in procession, with his pretty grand-daughter, Alaida (the Morning Star), to the Prince’s tents, to escort the dress of the bridegroom, sent as a present by the bride. We went accordingly in full procession, as described before, taking back the oily mixture. Mulka Begam received us at the Prince’s tent; he was placed on a silver footstool; Mulka took off his upper dress, and rubbed his face and arms with the mixture; she then arrayed him in a dress of yellow and orange muslin, a red turban, and red silk pajamas, in which attire he looked very handsome.
Before him sat three women, the Domnee, playing and singing bridal songs; I saw the Prince turn very red; he looked at the women, and said something in a low tone to Mulka Begam, who answered,—“The mem sāhiba knows they are singing gālee (abuse); but she does not understand Hindostanee sufficiently to comprehend their songs.” The language of the songs is complete slang. Yellow powder, mixed with water, was then thrown in frolic at all the people; I made my salām, quitted the tent, and finding a gentleman in waiting ready to drive me back, returned to Colonel Gardner’s, leaving the rest of the party to play and sing all night. Thus ended the first day of the ceremonies.
At the festival of the Hūlī, which is particularly dedicated to Krishnŭ, images of the deity are carried about on elephants, horses, in palkees, &c. The songs are exclusively in honour of Krishnŭ, and hailing the return of the season, personified under the name of Vasanta, generally pronounced Bessant. Kama, the god of love, is the son of Krishnŭ.
The Hoolī was celebrated by the natives with due glee; they threw abeer (red powder) into each other’s faces, and then squirted orange-coloured water over it; people were also sent on April-fool errands. Colonel Gardner avoided appearing amongst the people during this festival, and I imitated his example. The orange-coloured water is tinged with the flowers of the dhāk tree; the abeer is flour made from the singharra (water nut), and dyed with red sanders; the roots of the singharra are loosened by means of ropes fastened between two boats, with several men in each; and iron prongs are used in collecting them.
I mentioned to Colonel Gardner the songs of the women, the Domnee, who were in the tent, and the distress of the Prince. He said, “When marriages are negotiating, in particular, they are of the most unchaste description; they are admitted on such occasions, but the nāch girls never; the songs of the Domnee are indecent beyond the conception of an European.”
Nāch women dance and sing before men, and are not allowed to enter zenānas of respectability; but in all great establishments, such as Colonel Gardner’s, and that of his son, the slave girls are formed into sets of dancing girls, to sing and play for the amusement of the Begams.
Colonel Gardner remarked, “The songs of the nāch girls are never indecent, unless ‘by particular desire,’ and then in representing the bearer’s dance,—a dance which is never performed before ladies.”
The following tradition may account for the great noise made with native instruments at a wedding:—“The difference between the lawful and unlawful, in marriage, is proclamation and the beating of drums for them.” “Aa’yeshah gave a woman, who was nearly related to her, in marriage to one of the assistants; and the prophet came and said, ‘Have you sent the young woman to her husband?’ She said, ‘Yes.’ The prophet said, ‘Have you sent any singers with her?’ She said, ‘No.’ On which the prophet said, ‘Verily the assistants are a tribe fond of singing; therefore, had you sent any one with her to have sung A’taina’cum, A’taina’cum, then he would have prayed for your life and mine.’” A’taina’cum, a’taina’cum,—we come to you, we come to you, are the words of a song sung in marriage processions.
Aamīr-bin-sad said, “I went to Kardhah-bin-cab, and Abu Masuud Ansarī, in an assembly, in which was a bridal feast; and some women were singing; and I said, ‘O ye two companions of the prophet of God! and O ye men of Bedr! (i.e. combatants in that battle) shall this act (that is, singing), be done near you?’ They said to me, ‘Sit down if you please, and hear with us; but, if you please, go away, because the prophet permitted us to hear nuptial songs.’”
Domra is the name of a caste of Musalmāns, the males of which are musicians, and the females sing and dance in the company of females only.