Actus Tertius. Scæna Prima.
Enter Host, Hostess, and Bianca.
Host.
Haunted, my house is haunted with goblins. I shall be frighted out of my wits, and set up a sign only to invite Carriers and Foot-posts; scar-crows to keep off the Cavalry, and Gentry of the best rank. I will nail up my doors, and wall up my Girle (wife) like an Anchoress; or she will be ravisht before our faces, by rascalls and cacafugo's (wife) cacafugo's.
Hostess. These are your In-comes, remember your own proverb, the savor of every gain smelt sweet; thank no body but your self for this trouble.
Host. No gauling (dear Spouse) no gauling, every days new vexation abates me two inches in the waste, terrible pennance for an Host, Girle, girle, girle, Which of all this gally-maufry of Mans flesh appears tolerable to thy choice; speak shortly, and speak truely: I must and will know, must and will; Hear ye that?
Bian. Sir, be not jealous of my care and duty;
I am so far from entertaining thoughts
Of liberty, that much more excellent objects
Than any of such course contents as these are,
Could not betray mine eye to force my heart;
Conceive a wish of any dearer happiness
Than your direction warrant's. I am yours Sir.
Hostess. What thinks the Man now? Is not this strange at 13.
Host. Very good words, there's a tang in e'm, and a sweet one, 'tis musick (wife) and now I come t'ee. Let us a little examine the several conditions of our Paragraphistical suitors. The first, a travelling Tailor, who by the mystery of his Needle and Thimble, hath survey'd the fashions of the French, and English; this Signior Ginger-bread, stitcht up in the shreds of a g[a]udy outside, sows Linings with his cross-leg'd complement, like an Ape doing tricks over a staffe, cringes, and crouches, and kisses his forefinger.
Hostess. Out upon him.
Host. A second, a lavolteteere, a saltatory, a dancer with a Kit at his Bum, one that, by teaching great Madonnas to foot it, has miraculously purchast a ribanded Wastcote, and four clean pair of socks; a fellow that skips as he walkes, and instead of sensible discourse, vents the curious conceit of some new tune stolen from a Mask, or a bawdy dittie, elevated for the Pole Artick of a Ladies chamber, in that file stands another of your inamoratoes.
Hostess. Hang him and his Fiddle together, he never fidles any child of ours.
Host. The third, a Mongrel, got by a Switzer on an Italian; this puppy, being left well estated, comes to Florence, that the world may take notice, how impossible it is for experience to alter the course of nature; a fool (wife) and indeed, a Clown turn'd Gallant, seldom or never proves other than a gallant fool, this toy prates to little purpose other than What's a Clock? Shall's go drink? De'e forsooth? and thank ye heartily; I fear no art in him to catch thee, and yet we must be tormented with this buzard amongst the rest.
Hostess. 'Tis your own folly, forbid him the House.
Host. The fourth, a Mule-driver, a stubborn and a harsh knave: the fifth a School-Master, a very amorous Pedant, run almost mad with study of Sonnets, and Complements out of old Play-ends, the last an Advocates Clerk, that speaks pure Fustian in Law-terms: excellent Courtiers all, and all as neate as a Magnifio's post new painted, at his entrance to an office; thou shalt have none of 'em. Laugh at 'em, do. I say thou shalt have none of 'em.
Bian. Still your command to me shall stand a Law.
Host. Now they throng like so many horse-coursers at a fair, in clusters about the Man of Art, for Love-powders, ingredients, potions, counsels, postures, complements, philters: the Devil and the—How now? Tumults? Batteries, Noise? ha, get from my sight. [Clown cries within.
Enter Forobosco, and Clown, his head bloody.
Clow. Murther me, do, pound me to Mummy, do; see what will come on't.
Foro. Dog, leave thy snarling, or I'll cut thy tongue out,
Thou un[l]ickt Bear, dar'st thou yet stand my fury,
My generous rage? yet! by the sulpherous damps
That feed the hungry and incessant darkness,
Which curles around the grim Alastors back,
Mutter again, and with one powerful word,
I'll call an Host up from the Stygian Lakes,
Shall waft thee to the Acherontick fens;
Where choak't with Mists as black as thy impostures,
Thou shalt live still a dying.
Clow. Conjure me to the Devil and you can, I live in
Hell upon earth already, and you had any mercy, you would
not practice upon a kind heart thus.
Host. You have drawn blood from him Signior, Is his
offence unpardonable?
Foro. A lump of ignorance, pray speak not for him,
A drowsie grossness, in all Christian Kingdoms,
The mention of my art, my name, my practise,
Merit and Glory hath begot at once
Delight and wonder; I'll not be entreated;
Spare intercession for him,——O thou scorn
Of learning, shame of duty; must thy sloth
Draw my just fame in question? I discharge thee
From my service; see me no more henceforth.
Clow. Discharge me! Is that my years wages?
I'll not be so answer'd.
Foro. Not Camel? Sirrah I am liberal to thee;
Thou hast thy life, be gone.
Clow. Vengeance, sweet vengeance.
Foro. De'e mumble?
Clow. I'll be reveng'd, monstrously, suddenly, and insatiably; my bulk begins to swell.
Foro. Homotolenton, Pragmatophoros, Heliostycorax.
Clo. Call up your Spirits, I defie 'em; well, I'll have Law for my broken pate, twelve ounces of pure blood; Troy-weight. In despight of thee my Master, and thy Master the grand Devil himself, vindicta, vindicta.—[Exit.
Host. Signior, you are exceeding mov'd.
Hostess. Mercy upon us, What terrible words thou talk'st?
Foro. A slave, a curr—but be not you afrighted
Young Virgin, 'twere an injury to sweetness:
Should any rough sound draw from your cheeks,
The pretious tincture which makes nature proud
Of her own workmanship.
Host. Wife, Mark, mark that Wife.
Bian. Shake then your anger off Sir.
Foro. You command it
Fair one, mine Host and Hostess, with your leaves
I have a motion joyntly to you all.
Hostess. An honest one I hope.
Host. Well put in Wife.
Foro. A very necessary one, the Mes
And half of suitors, that attend to usher
Their Loves sir-reverence to your daughter, wait
With one consent, which can best please her eye;
In offering at a Dance, I have provided
Musick. And, 'twill be something I dare promise
Worthy your laughter, Shall they have admittance?
Host. By any means, for I am perswaded the manner will be so
Ridiculous, that it will confirm the assurance of their
Miserable fooleries, but no longer trouble with 'em here,
Than they are in these May-games.
Foro. So I am resolv'd.
Hostess. Nor any wise word of senceless love.
Foro. Not any; I have charm'd them, Did you see
How they prepar'd themselves? how they stroak up
Their foretops, how they justle for the Looking-glass,
To set their faces by it; [See they Muster.
You would look for some most impossible antick.
Enter Tailor, Dancer, Mule-driver, School-Master, Clark: (all with several papers, and present 'em to Forobosco.)
Host. So, so, so, so, here flutter the nest of Hornets, the hotch-potch of rascallity; now, now, now, now, the dung-hill of corruption hath yawn'd forth the burthen of abhomination. I am vext, vext to the soul, will rid my house of this unchristen'd fry, and never open my doors again.
Foro. Some other time, I'll give no answer now,
But have preferred your suits, here shew your cunning.
First, every one in order do his honor
To the fair mark you shoot at; courtly, courtly,
Convey your several loves in lively measure:
Come, let us take our seates, some sprightly Musick.
Host. Dance all and part, 'tis a very necessary farewell.
Enter Cæsario, They all make ridiculous conges to Bianca: rank themselves, and dance in several postures: during the dance, Enter Cæsario, and stands off.
Host. Well done my lusty bloods, precisely well done,
One lusty rouse of Wine, and take leave on all sides.
Cesar. Thanks for your Revels Gentlemen; accept
This Gold, and drink as freely as you danc'd.
Host. My noble Lord Cesario, clear the rooms Sirs.
Foro. Away. Attend your answers. [—Exeunt Foro, and those that danc'd.
Cesar. With your favor Rolando, I would change a word or two with your fair daughter.
Host. At your Lordships pleasure, come Wife, no muttering, have a care Girle, my love, service, and duty to your good Lordship. [—Exeunt and Wife.
Cesar. My often visits (sweet Bianca) cannot
But constantly inform thy judgment, wherein
Thy happiness consists, for to steal minutes
From great imployments, to converse with beauty,
Lodg'd in so mean a fortune, to lay by
Consideration of the unequal distance
Between my blood and thine, to shun occasions
Of courtship with the Ladies of the time:
Noble, and fair, only for love to thee,
Must of necessity invite a tenderness;
As low as nature could have stampt a Bondwomans.
To entertain quick motions of rare gratitude
For my uncommon favors.
Bian. 'Deed my Lord, as far as my simplicity can lead me,
I freely thank your curtesies.
Cesar. To thank them, is to reward them pretty one.
Bian. Then teach me
How I may give them back again; in truth
I never yet receiv'd a pair of Gloves:
A trifling Ring from any that expected
An equall satisfaction, but as willingly
I parted with the guift unto the owner, as he bestow'd it.
Cæsar. But I pour before thee
Such plenties, as it lies not in the ability
Of thy whole kindred, to return proportionable
One for a thousand.
Bian. You my Lord conclude
For my instruction, to ingage a debt
Beyond a possibility of paiment,
I ever thought a sin; and therefore justly
Without conceit of scorn, or curious rudeness,
I must refuse your bounty.
Cesar. Canst thou love?
Bian. Love! Is there such a word in any Language
That carries honest sence?
Cesar. Never dwelt ignorance
In so sweet-shap't a building: love, Bianca,
Is that firm knot which ties two hearts in one:
Shall ours be tied so?
Bian. Use a plainer word,
My Lord. In stead of tyes, say marries hearts,
Then I may understand.
Cæsar. Their hearts are married
Whose enterchange of pleasures, and embraces,
Soft kisses, and the privacies of sweets,
Keeps constant league together, when temptation
Of great mens oathes and gifts, shall urge contempt,
Rather than batter resolution, novelty
Of sights, or taste of new delights in wantonness,
Breeds surfeit more than appetite in any
Reserv'd to noble vowes; my excellent Maid,
Live thou but true to me, and my contents,
Mine only, that no partner may partake
The treasure of those sweets thy youth yet glories in,
And I will raise thy lowness to abundance
Of all varieties, and more triumph
In such a Mistris, than great Princes doating
On truth-betraying Wives.
Bian. Thus to yield up then
The cottage of my virtue, to be swallow'd
By some hard-neighbouring Landlord, such as you are,
Is in effect to love, a Lord so vicious!
O where shall innocence find some poor dwelling,
Free from temptations tyranny.
Cesar. Nay prethee.
Byan. Gay clothes, high feeding, easie beds of lust,
Change of unseemly sights; with base discourse,
Draw curses on your Pallaces; for my part,
This I will be confirm'd in, I will eate
The bread of labour, know no other rest
Than what is earn'd from honest pains, ere once more
Lend ear to your vile toyles; Sir, would you were
As noble in desires, as I could be in knowing virtue.
Pray do not afflict a poor soul thus.
Cesar. I swear —— to me?— [Bianca steales off.
Enter a Gentleman.
Gent. The Duke my Lord commands your speedy presence
For answering agrievances lately urg'd
Against you by your Mother?
Cesar. By my Mother.
Gent. The Court is near on sitting.
Cesar. I wait on it Sir.— [Exeunt.
Enter Duke, Magistrate, Secretary, Baptista, Attendants, Mentivole: (they sit) Mentivole stands by.
Duke. What waste of blood, what tumults, what divisions,
What outrages, what uprores in a State,
Factions, though issuing from mean springs at first,
Have (not restrain'd) flowed to, the sad example
At Rome, between the Ursins and Columni's:
Nay, here at home, in Florence, 'twixt the Neers
And the Bianchi, can too mainly witness.
I sit not at the Helm (my Lords) of Sovereignty
Deputed Pilot for the Common-wealth,
To sleep while others steere (as their wild fancies
Shall counsel) by the compass of disorders.
Baptista, This short Preface is directed
Chiefly to you, the petty brawls and quarrels
Late urg'd betwixt th' Alberti and your family;
Must, yes, and shall, like tender unknit joynts,
Fasten again together of themselves:
Or like an angry Chyrurgion, we will use
The roughness of our justice, to cut off
The stubborn rancour of the limbes offending.
Bap. Most gracious Florence.
Duke. Our command was signified,
That neither of the followers of each party
Should appear here with weapons.
Bap. 'Tis obey'd Sir, on my side.
Duke. We must leave the general cause
Of State employments, to give ear to brawls
Of some particular grudges, pollitick government
For tutor'd Princes, but no more henceforth.
Enter Mariana, and Clarissa at one door, Cesario at the other.
Our frown shall check presumption, not our clemency.
Mari. All blessings due to unpartial Princes,
Crown Florence with eternity of happiness.
Cesar. If double Prayers can double blessings (great Sir)
Mine joyn for your prosperity with my Mothers.
Duke. Rise both; now briefly (Lady) without circumstance
Deliver those agrievances, which lately
Your importunity possest our Counsel,
Were fit for audience, wherein you petition'd,
You might be heard without an Advocate,
Which boon you find is granted.
Mari. Though divided.
I stand between the Laws of truth and modesty,
Yet let my griefs have vent: Yet the clearness
Of strange necessity requires obedience
To nature and your Mercy, in my weeds
Of mourning, emblems of too dear misfortunes,
Badges of griefs, and Widdowhood, the burthen
Of my charg'd soul, must be laid down before you;
Wherein, if strict opinion cancel shame,
My frailty is my plea;
Stand forth young Man,
And hear a story that will strike all reason
Into amazement.
Cesar. I attend.
Mar. Alberto (peace dwell upon his ashes) still the husband
Of my remembrance and unchanging vowes,
Has, by his death, left to his heir possession
Of fair revenew, which this young man claimes
As his inheritance. I urg'd him gently,
Friendly, and privately, to grant a partage
Of this estate to her who ownes it all,
This his supposed Sister.
Bap. How supposed?
Cesar. Pray Madam recollect your self.
Mar. The relish
Of a strange truth begins to work like Physick
Already: I have bitterness to mingle
With these preparatives, so deadly loathsome;
It will quite choak digestion; shortly hear it
Cesario, for I dare not rob unjustly
The poor soul of his name; this, this Cesario
Neither for Father had Alberto, me
For Mother, nor Clarissa for his Sister.
Claris. Mother, O Mother.
Ment. I am in a Dream sure.
Duke. No interruptions. Lady on.
Mari. Mistake not,
Great Duke of Tuscany, or the beginning
Or process of this novelty; my husband
The now deceas'd Alberto, from his youth
In-ur'd to an impatiency, and roughness
Of disposition, when not many months
After our Marriage were worn out, repin'd
At the unfritful barrenness of youth,
Which, as he pleas'd to terme it, cut our hopes off
From blessing of some issue; to prevent it
I grew ambitious of no fairer honor
Than to preserve his love, and as occasions
Still call'd him from me, studied in his absence
How I might frame his welcome home with comfort.
At last I fain'd my self with Child; the Message
Of freedome, or relief, to one half starv'd
In prison, is not utter'd with such greediness
Of expectation, and delight, as this was
To my much affected Lord; his care, his goodness;
(Pardon me that I use the word) exceeded
All former fears, the hour of my deliverance
As I pretended, drawing near, I fashion'd
My birth-rights at a Country Garden-house,
Where then my Faulk'ners Wife was brought a bed
Of this Cesario; him I own'd for mine;
Presented him unto a joyful Father.
Duke. Can you prove this true?
Mari. Proofs I have most evident;
But oh the curse of my impatiency; shortly,
E'r three new Moons had spent their borrow'd Lights,
I grew with Child indeed, so just is Heaven,
The issue of which burthen was this Daughter;
Judge now most gracious Prince, my Lords and you,
What combats then, and since, I have indur'd,
Between a Mothers piety, and weakness
Of a Soul trembling Wife; to have reveal'd
This secret to Alberto, had been danger
Of ruin to my fame, besides the conflict
Of his distractions; now to have supprest it,
Were to defeat my Child, my only Child,
Of her most lawful honors, and inheritance.
Cæsario, th'art a Man still, Education
Hath moulded thee a Gentleman, continue so;
Let not this fall from greatness sink thee lower
Than worthy thoughts may warrant, yet disclaim
All interest in Alberto's blood, thou hast not
One drop of his or mine.
Duke. Produce your witness.
Marian. The Faulconers Wife his Mother,
And such women as waited then upon me,
Sworn to the privacy of this great secret.
Duke. Give them all their Oaths.
Cesar. O let me crave forbearance, gracious Sir,
Vouchsafe me hearing.
Duke. Speak Cæsario.
Cesar. Thus long
I have stood silent, and with no unwillingness,
Attended the relation of my fall,
From a fair expectation; what I fear'd
(Since the first syllable this Lady utter'd
Of my not being hers) benevolent Fates
Have eas'd me off; for to be basely born,
If not base-born, detracts not from the bounty
Of natures freedom, or an honest birth.
Nobility claim'd by the right of blood,
Shewes chiefly, that our Ancestors desir'd
What we inherit; but that Man whose actions
Purchase a real merit to himself,
And rancks him in the file of praise and honor,
Creates his own advancement; let me want
The fuel which best feeds the fires of greatness,
Lordly possessions, yet shall still my gratitude
By some attempts, of mention not unworthy,
Endeavour to return a fit acquittance
To that large debt I owe your favours (Madam)
And great Alberto's memory and goodness;
O that I could as gently shake off passion
For the loss of that great brave Man, as I can shake off
Remembra[n]ce of that once I was reputed;
I have not much to say, this Princely presence
Needs not too strictly to examine farther
The truth of this acknowledgment; a Mother
Dares never disavow her only son,
And any woman must come short of Piety,
That can, or dis-inherit her own issue,
Or fears the voice of rumor for a stranger.
Madam, you have confest, my Father was
A servant to your Lord and you: by interest
Of being his son, I cannot but claim justly
The honor of continuing still my service
To you and yours; which granted, I beg leave
I may for this time be dismist.
Duke. Bold spirit.
Bap. I love thee now with pitty.
Duke. Go not yet—
A sudden tempest that might shake a rock,
Yet he stands firm against it; much it moves me,
He, not Alberto's son, and she a Widdow,
And she a Widdow,—Lords your ear.
Omnes. Your pleasure.— [Whispers.
Duke. So, Lady, what you have avouch'd is truth.
Mari. Truth only, gracious Sir.
Duke. Hear then our Sentence.
Since from his cradle you have fed and foster'd
Cæsario as your Son, and train'd him up
To hopes of greatness; which now in a moment
You utterly again have ruin'd, this way
We with our Counsel are resolv'd, you being
A Widdow, shall accept him for a husband.
Maria. Husband to me, Sir?
Duke. 'Tis in us to raise him
To honors, and his vertues will deserve 'em.
Maria. But Sir, 'tis in no Prince, nor his Prerogative,
To force a Womans choice against her heart.
Duke. True, if then you appeale to higher Justice,
Our Doom includes this clause upon refusal,
Out of your Lords revenues shall Cæsario
Assure to any, whom he takes for Wife,
The inheritance of three parts; the less remainer
Is dowry large enough to marry a daughter;
And we, by our Prerogative, which you question,
Will publickly adopt him into th'name
Of your deceas'd Alberto, that the memory
Of so approv'd a Peer may live in him
That can preserve his memory; 'less you find out
Some other means, which may as amply satisfie
His wrong, our Sentence stands irrevocable:
What think you Lords?
Omnes. The Duke is just and honorable.
Bap. Let me embrace Cæsario, henceforth ever
I vow a constant friendship.
Mentivole. I remit all former difference.
Cesar. I am too poor
In words to thank this Justice. Madam, alwayes
My studies shall be love to you, and duty.
Duke. Replies we admit none. Cæsario wait on us.
[Exeunt. Manent, Mentivole, Bap. Mari. Claris.
Bap. Mentivole.
Menti. My Lord.
Bap. Look on Clarissa, she's noble, rich, young, fair.
Mentivole. My Lord, and virtuous.
Bap. Mentivole and virtuous.—Madam.
Maria. Tyranny of Justice, I shall live reports derision,
That am compell'd to exchange a graceful Widdowhood
For a continual Martyrdome in Marriage,
With one so much beneath me.
Bap. I'll plead for ye
Boldly and constantly, let your daughter only
Admit my son her servant, at next visit,
Madam, I'll be a messenger of comfort.
Mentivole, be confident and earnest. [Exit.
Maria. Married again, to him too! better 'thad been
The young Man should have still retain'd the honors
Of old Alberto's son, than I the shame
Of making him successor of his bed; I was too blame.
Ment. Indeed without offence,
Madam I think you were.
Claris. You urge it fairly, and like a worthy friend.
Maria. Can you say any thing
In commendation of a Mushroom withered
Assoon as started up?
Ment. You scorn an Innocent
Of noble growth, for whiles your husband liv'd
I have heard you boast Cesario in all actions
Gave matter of report of Imitation,
Wonder and envy; let not discontinuance
Of some few days estrange a sweet opinion
Of virtue, ch[ie]fly when, in such extremity,
Your pitty not contempt will argue goodness.
Maria. O Sir.
Cla. If you would use a thriving courtship,
You cannot utter a more powerfull language
That I shall listen to with greater greediness
Than th'argument you prosecute; this speaks you
A man compleat and excellent.
Ment. I speak not, they are his own deserts.
Maria. Good Sir forbear,
I am now fully sensible of running
Into a violent Lethargy, whose deadliness
Locks up all reason, I shall never henceforth
Remember my past happiness.
Ment. These clouds may be disperst.
Maria. I fear continuall night
Will over-shroud me, yet poor youth his trespass
Lies in his fortune, not the cruelty
Of the Duke's sentence.
Cla. I dare think it does.
Maria. If all fail I will learn thee to conquer
Adversity with sufferance.
Ment. You resolve Nobly. [Exeunt.
Actus Quartus. Scæna Prima.
Enter Cesario and a Servant.
Cesar.
Let any friend have entrance.
Servant. Sir a'shall.
Cesar. Any, I except none.
Serv. We know, your mind Sir. [—Exit.
Cesar. Pleasures admit no bounds.
I am pitcht so high
To such a growth of full prosperities
That to conceal my fortunes were an injury
To gratefulness, and those more liberall favours
By whom my glories prosper. He that flowes
In gracious and swolne tydes of best abundance,
Yet will be Ignorant of his own fortunes,
Deserves to live contemn'd, and dye forgotten;
The harvest of my hopes is now already
Ripen'd and gather'd, I can fatten youth
With choice of plenty, and supplies of comforts,
My fate springs in my own hand, and I'll use it.
Enter 2 Servants and Biancha.
1 'Tis my place.
2 Yours? here fair one, I'll aquaint my Lord.
1 He's here, go to him boldly.
2 Please you to let him understand how readily
I waited on your errand?
1 Saucy fellow, you must excuse his breeding.
Cesar. What's the matter?
Biancha, my Biancha, to your offices. [Exit Ser.
This visit (Sweet) from thee (my pretty dear)
By how much more 'twas unexpected, comes
So much the more timely: witness this free welcome,
What ere occasion led thee.
Bian. You must guess Sir,
Yet indeed 'tis a rare one.
Ces. Prethee speak it, my honest virtuous maid.
Bian. Sir I have heard
Of your misfortunes, and I cannot tell you
Whether I have more cause of joy or sadness,
To know they are a truth.
Ces. What truth Biancha? misfortunes, how, wherein?
Bian. You are disclaym'd
For being the Lord Alberto's Son, and publickly
Acknowledg'd of as mean a birth as mine is,
It cannot chuse but greive ye.
Ces. Greive me? Ha ha ha ha? Is this all?
Bian. This all?
Ces. Thou art sorry for't
I warrant thee: alas good soul, Biancha,
That which thou call'st misfortune is my happiness,
My happiness Biancha.
Bian. If you love me, it may prove mine too.
Ces. May it? I will love thee.
My good, good maid,
If that can make thee happy,
Better and better love thee.
Bian. Without breach then
Of modesty I come to claime the Interest
Your protestations, both by vows and letters,
Have made me owner of: from the first hour
I saw you, I confess I wisht I had been
Or not so much below your rank and greatness,
Or not so much above those humble flames
That should have warm'd my bosome with a temperate
Equality of desires in equal fortunes.
Still as you utter'd Language of affection,
I courted time to pass more slowly on
That I might turn more fool to lend attention
To what I durst not credit, nor yet hope for:
Yet still as more I heard, I wisht to hear more.
Ces. Didst thou introth wench?
Bian. Willingly betraid
My self to hopeless bondage.
Ces. A good girl,
I thought I should not miss
What ere thy answer was.
Biancha. But as I am a maid Sir, and I'faith
You may believe me, for I am a maid,
So dearly I respected both your fame
And quality, that I would first have perisht
In my sick thoughts than ere have given consent
To have undone your fortunes by inviting
A marriage with so mean an one as I am.
I should have dyed sure, and no creature known
The sickness that had kill'd me.
Ces. Pretty heart, good Soul, alas, alas.
Bian. Now since I know
There is no difference 'twixt your birth and mine,
Not much 'twixt our estates, if any be,
The advantage is on my side, I come willingly
To tender you the first fruits of my heart,
And am content t'accept you for my husband,
Now when you are at lowest.
Ces. For a husband?
Speak sadly, dost thou mean so?
Bian. In good deed Sir,
'Tis pure love makes this proffer.
Ces. I believe thee,
What counsail urg'd thee on, tell me, thy Father
My worshipfull smug Host? wast not he wench?
Or mother Hostess? ha?
Bian. D'ee mock my parentage?
I doe not scorn yours.
Mean folks are as worthy
To be well spoken of if they deserve well,
As some whose onely fame lies in their blood,
O y'are a proud poor man: all your oaths falshood,
Your vows deceit, your letters forg'd, and wicked.
Ces. Thou'dst be my wife, I dare swear.
Bian. Had your heart,
Your hand and tongue been twins, you had reputed
This courtesy a benefit.
Ces. Simplicity,
How prettily thou mov'st me! why Biancha,
Report has coz'ned thee, I am not fallen
From my expected honors, or possessions,
Though from the hope of birthright.
Bian. Are you not?
Then I am lost again, I have a suit too;
You'll grant it if you be a good man.
Ces. Any thing.
Bian. Pray doe not talk of ought what I have said t'ee.
Ces. As I wish health I will not.
Bian. Pitty me, but never love me more.
Ces. Nay now y'are cruell,
Why all these tears?—Thou shalt not go.
Bian. I'll pray for ye
That you may have a virtuous wife, a fair one,
And when I am dead—
Ces. Fy, fy.
Bian. Think on me sometimes,
With mercy for this trespass.
Ces. Let us kiss
At parting as at coming.
Bian. This I have
As a free dower to a virgins grave,
All goodness dwell with ye.— [Exit.
Ces. Harmeless Biancha! unskill'd;
What hansome toyes are maids to play with!
Enter Mariana and Clarissa.
How innocent! But I have other thoughts
Of nobler meditation.—my felicity,
Thou commest as I could wish, lend me a lip
Soft as melting as when old Alberto
After his first nights triall taking farewell
Of thy youth's conquest tasted.
Maria. You are uncivill.
Ces. I will be Lord of my own pleasures, Madam
Y'are mine, mine freely,
Come, no whimpering henceforth
New con the lessons of loves best experience,
That our delights may meet in equal measure
Of resolutions and desires; this sulleness
Is scurvy, I like it not.
Mar. Be modest.
And do not learn Cesario how to prostitute
The riot of thy hopes to common folly;
Take a sad womans word, how ere thou doat'st
Upon the present graces of thy greatnes.
Yea I am not falen so below my constancy
To virtue, nor the care which I once tend'red
For thy behoof that I prefer a sentence
Of cruelty before my honor.
Ces. Honor!
Maria. Hear me, thou seest this girl! now the comfort
Of my last days. She is the onely pledge
Of a bed truely noble: shee had a father
(I need not speak him more than thou remembrest)
Whom to dishonor by a meaner choice,
Were injury and infamy.
Claris. To goodnes,
To time and virtuous mention.
Mar. I have vow'd,
Observe me now Cesario, that how ere
I may be forc'd to marry, yet no tyranny,
Persuasions, flattery, guifts, intreats, or tortures,
Shall draw me to a second bed.
Clar. Tis just too.
Maria. Yes and 'tis just Clarissa. I allow
The Duke's late sentence, am resolv'd young man
To be thy wife, but when the ceremony
Of marriage is perform'd, in life I will be,
Though not in name, a widdow.
Ces. Pray a word t'ee,
Shall I in earnest never be your bedfellow?
Maria. Never, O never; and 'tis for your good too.
Ces. Prove that.
Mar. Alas too many years are numbred
In my account to entertain the benefit
Which youth in thee Cesario, and ability
Might hope for and require, it were Injustice
To rob a gentleman deserving memory
Of Issue to preserve it.
Ces. No more herein,
You are an excellent pattern of true piety,
Let me now turn your advocate. Pray look into
The order of the Duke. Injoyn'd, admit
I satisfie the sentence without mariage
With you, how then?
Mar. Cesario.
Ces. If I know
How to acquit your fears, yet keep th'injunction
In every clause whole and entire, your charity
Will call me still your servant.
Mar. Still my son.
Ces. Right Madam, now you have it, still your son.
The Genius of your blessings hath instructed
Your tongue oraculously, we will forget
How once I and Clarissa enterchang'd
The tyes of brother and of sister, henceforth
New stile us man and wife.
Cla. By what authority?
Ces. Heavens great appointment, yet in all my dotage
On thy perfections, when I thought Clarissa
We had been pledges of one womb, no lose
No wanton heat of youth, desir'd to claime
Priority in thy affections, other
Than nature might commend. Chastly I tend'red
Thy welfare as a brother ought; but since
Our bloods are strangers, let our hearts contract
A long life-lasting unity, for this way
The sentence is to be observ'd or no way.
Mar. Then no way.
Ces. I expected other answer Madam from you.
Mar. No, every age shall curse me,
The monster, and the prodigie of nature,
Horrors beyond extremity.
Cla. Pray mother confine the violence of greif.
Ces. Yes mother, pray do.
Mar. Thus some catch at a matrons honor
By flying lust to plot Incestuous witchcrafts.
More terrible than whoredomes; cruell mercy!
When to preserve the body from a death
The soul is strangled.
Ces. This is more than passion,
It comes near to distraction.
Mar. I am quieted.
Cesario, thou mayest tell the Duke securely
Alberto's titles, honors and revenues,
The Duke may give away, enjoy them thou.
Clarissas birthright, Marianas dower
Thou shalt be Lord of; turn us to the world
Unpittied and unfriended, yet my bed
Thou never sleep'st in; as for her; she hears me,
If she as much as in a thought consent;
That thou may'st call her wife, a Mothers curse
Shall never leave her.
Clar. As a brother once
I lov'd you, as a noble friend yet honor ye,
But for a husband sir, I dare not own you,
My faith is given already.
Ces. To a Villain, I'll cut his throat.
Mar. Why this is more than passion!
It comes near a distraction.
Clar. Call to mind Sir.
How much you have abated of that goodness
Which once reign'd in ye, they appear'd so lovely
That such as friendship led to observation
Enter Baptista and Mentivole.
Courted the great example.
Ces. Left, and flatter'd into a broad derision?
Mar. Why d'ee think so?
My Lord Baptista, is your Son grown cold
In hasting on the marriage, which his vows
Have seal'd to my wrong'd daughter?
Bap. We come Lady, to consummate the contract.
Ces. With Mentivole? is he the man?
Ment. Clarissas, troth and mine,
Cesario, are recorded in a character
So plain and certain, that except the hand
Of heaven, which writ it first, would blot it out again,
No humane power can raze it.
Ces. But say you so too young Lady?
Cla. I should else betray
My heart to falshood, and my tongue to perjury.
Ces. Madam, you know the sentence.
Bap. From the Duke,
I have particular comforts which require
A private [e]are.
Mar. I shall approve it gladly
We are resolv'd Cesario.
Bap. Be not insolent upon a Princes favor.
Cla. Loose no glory,
Your younger years have purchast.
Ment. And deserved too, y'have many worthy freinds.
Bap. Preserve and use them. [Exeunt. Manet Cesar.
Ces. Good, very good, why here's a complement
Of mirth in desperation, I could curse
My fate: O with what speed men tumble down
From hopes that soar too high. Biancha now
May scorn me justly too, Clarissa married,
Alberto's widdow resolute, Biancha
Refus'd, and I forsaken: let me study,
I can but die a Batchelor that's the worst on't. [Exit.
Enter Host, Taylor, Muliter, Dancer, Pedant, Coxcombe.
Host. Come Gentlemen,
This is the day that our great artist hath
Promis'd to give all your severall suits satisfaction.
Dancer. Is he stirring?
Host. He hath been at his book these t[w]o hours.
Pedant. He's a rare Physitian.
Host. Why I'll tell you,
Were Paracelsus the German now
Living, he'd take up his single rapier against his
Terrible long sword, he makes it a matter of nothing
To cure the gout, sore eyes he takes out as familiarly,
Washes them, and puts them in again,
As you'd blanch almonds.
Tay. They say he can make gold.
Host. I, I, he learnt it of Kelly in Germanny.
There's not a Chymist
In christendome can goe beyond him for multiplying.
Pedant. Take heed then;
He get not up your daughters belly my Host.
Host. You are a merry Gentleman
And the man of art will love you the better.
Dancer. Does he love mirth and crotchets?
Host. O he's the most courteous Physitian,
You may drink or drab in's company freely,
The better he knows how your disease grows,
The better he knows how to cure it.
Danc. But I wonder my Host
He has no more resort of Ladyes to him.
Host. Why Sir?
Dan. O divers of them have great beleif in conjurers:
Lechery is a great help to the quality.
Host. He's scarce known to be in town yet,
Ere long we shall have 'em come
Hurrying hither in Fetherbeds.
Dan. How? bedridden?
Host. No sir, in fetherbeds that move upon 4 wheels in
Spanish caroches.
Ped. Pray accquaint him we give attendance.
Host. I shall gentlemen; I would fain be rid
Of these rascalls, but that they raise profit
To my wine cellar.
When I have made use of them sufficiently,
I will intreat the conjurer to tye crackers to their tails,
And send them packing.
Enter Forobosco as in his Study. (A paper)
Foro. Come hither mine Host, look here.
Host. What's that?
Foro. A challenge from my man.
Host. For breaking's pate?
Foro. He writes here if I meet him not
I'th' Feild within this half hour,
I shall hear more from him.
Host. O sir, minde your profit,
Ne'er think of the rascall, here are the gentlemen.
Foro. 'Morrow my worthy clients,
What are you all prepar'd of your questions;
That I may give my resolution upon them?
Omnes. We are Sir.
Pedant. And have brought our mony.
Foro. Each then in order,
And differ not for precedency.
Dan. I am buying of an office Sir,
And to that purpose I would fain learn
To dissemble cunningly.
Foro. Doe you come to me for that? you should rather
Have gone to a cunning woman.
Danc. I sir but their Instructions are but like wom[e]n,
Pretty well but not to the depth, as I'd have it:
You are a conjurer, the devils Master,
And I would learn it from you so exactly.
Foro. That the devill himself
Might not go beyond you.
Dane. You are i'th' right Sir.
Foro. And so your mony for your purchase
Might come in again within a 12 month.
Danc. I would be a Graduate sir, no freshman.
F[e]ro. Here's my hand sir,
I will make you dissemble so methodically,
As if the divell should be sent from the great Turk,
In the shape of an Embassador
To set all the Christian princes at variance.
Danc. I cannot with any modesty desire any more.
There's your mony sir.
Foro. For the art of dissembling.
Cox. My suit sir will be news to you when I tell it.
Foro. Pray on.
Cox. I would set up a press here in Italy,
To write all the Corantos for Christendome.
Foro. That's news indeed,
And how would you imploy me in't?
Cox. Marry sir, from you
I would gain my intelligence.
Foro. I conceive you, you would have me furnish you
With a spirit to informe you.
Cox. But as quiet a Divell as the woman,
The first day and a half after she's married,
I can by no means indure a terrible one.
Foro. No, no, I'll qualifie him,
He shall not fright you,
It shall be the ghost of some lying Stationer,
A Spirit shall look as if butter would not melt in his
mouth. A new Mercurius Gallo-belgicus.
Cox. O there was a captain was rare at it.
Foro. Ne'er thinke of him,
Though that captain writ a full hand gallop,
And wasted indeed more harmeless paper than
Ever did laxative Physick,
Yet will I make you to out-scribble him,
And set down what you please,
The world shall better believe you.
Cox. Worthy sir I thank you, there's mony.
Foro. A new office
For writing pragmaticall Curranto's.
Pedant. I am a school-master sir,
And would fain conferre with you
About erecting 4 new sects of religion at Amsterdam.
Foro. What the Divell should
New sects of religion doe there?
Pedant. I assure you I would get
A great deal of money by it.
Foro. And what are the 4 new sects
Of religion you would plant there?
Ped. Why that's it I come about sir,
'Tis a Divel of your raising must invent 'em,
I confess I am too weak to compass it.
Foro. So sir, then you make it a matter of no difficulty
To have them tolerated.
Pedant. Trouble not your self for that,
Let but your Divel set them a foot once.
I have Weavers, and Ginger-bread makers,
And mighty Aquavitæ-men, shall set them a going.
Foro. This is somewhat difficult,
And will aske some conference with the divell.
Ped. Take your own leasure sir,
I have another business too, because I mean
To leave Italy, and bury my self in those neather parts
Of the low countries.
Foro. What's that sir.
Ped. Marry I would fain make 9 dayes to the week,
for the more ample benefit of the captain.
Foro. You have a shrewd pate sir.
Ped. But how this might be compass'd?
Foro. Compass'd easily; tis but making
A new Almanack, and dividing the compass
Of the year into larger penny-worths,
As a Chandler with his compass makes
A Geometrick proportion of the Holland cheese
He retailes by stivers.
But for getting of it licenc'd?
Ped. Trouble not your self with that sir,
There's your mony.
Foro. For four new sects of religions,
And 9 dayes to the week.
Ped. To be brought in at general pay-dayes,
Write I beseech you.
Foro. At generall pay-dayes.
Taylor. I am by profession a Taylor,
You have heard of me.
Foro. Yes sir, and will not steal from you
The least part of that commendation I have heard utter'd.
Taylor. I take measure of your worth sir,
And because I will not afflict you with any large bill
Of circumstances, I will snip off particulars.
I would fain invent some strange
And exquisite new fashions.
Foro. Are you not travel'd sir.
Tay. Yes sir, but have observ'd all we can see
Or invent, are but old ones with new names to'em,
Now I would some way or other grow more curious.
Foro. Let me see; to devise new fashions—
Were you never in the Moon?
Tay. In the Moon tavern! yes sir, often.
Foro. No, I do mean in the new world,
In the world that's in the Moon yonder.
Tay. How? a new world 'ith' moon?
Foro. Yes I assure you.
Tay. And peopled?
Foro. O most fantastically peopled.
Tay. Nay certain then there's work for taylors?
Foro. That there is I assure you.
Tay. Yet I have talked with a Scotch taylor
That never discover'd so much to me,
Though he has travell'd far, and was a pedlar in Poland.
Foro. That was out of his way,
This lies beyond China:
You would study new fashions you say?
Take my councell, make a voyage,
And discover that new world.
Tay. Shall I be a moon-man?
Foro. I am of opinion, the people of that world
(If they be like the nature of that climate they live in)
Do vary the fashion of their cloaths oftener than any
Quick-silver'd nation in Europe.
Tay. Not unlikely, but what should that be we call
The man in the moon then?
Foro. Why 'tis nothing but an Englishman
That stands there stark naked,
With a pair of sheers in one hand,
And a great bundle of broad cloath in the other
(Which resembles the bush of thorns)
Cutting out of new fashions.
Taylor. I have heard somewhat like this,
But how shall I get thither?
Foro. I'll make a new compass shall direct you.
Tay. Certain?
Foro. Count me else for no man of direction.
Tay. There's 20 duckats in hand, at my return
I'll give you a 100.
Foro. A new voyage to discover new fashions.
Mul. I have been a traveller too sir,
That have shewed strange beasts in Christendome,
And got money by them, but I find the trade to decay.
Your Camelion, or East-Indian hedg-hog
Gets very little mony, and your Elephant devours
So much bread, brings in so little profit,
His keeper were better every morning
Cram 15 Taylors with white manchet:
I would have some new spectacle,
And one that might be more attractive.
Foro. Let me see, were you ever in Spain?
Mule. Not yet Sir.
Foro. I would have you go to Madrill, and against some great festivall, when the court lies there, provide a great and spacious Eng[li]sh Oxe, and rost him whole, with a pudding in's bely; that would be the eighth wonder of the world in those parts I assure you.
Mule. A rare project without question.
Foro. Goe beyond all their garlike olle padridoes, though you sod one in Garguentuas couldron, bring in more money, then all the monsters of Affrick.
Host. Good Sir do your best for him; he's of my acquaintance, and one if ye knew him—
Foro. What is he?
Host. He was once a man of infinite letters.
Foro. A Scholar?
Host. No sir, a packet carrier, which is alwaies a man of many letters, you know: then he was Mule-driver, now he's a gentleman, and feeds monsters.
Foro. A most ungratefull calling.
Mule. There's money for your direction; the price of the Oxe Sir?
Foro. A hundred French crowns, for it must be a Lincolne-shire Oxe, and a prime one: For a rare and monstrous spectacle, to be seen at Madrill.
Enter Clown, Hostess, and Bianca.
Hostes. Pray forbear sir, we shall have a new quarrell.
Clow. You durst not meet me 'ith field, I am therefore come to spoyl your market.
Foro. What's the newes with you sir.
Clow. Gentlemen, you that come hither to be most abominably cheated, listen, and be as wise as your planet will suffer you, keep your mony, be not gul'd, be not laught at.
Pedant. What means this? would I had my mony again in my pocket.
Host. The fellow is full of malice, do not mind him.
Clow. This profest cheating rogue was my master, and I confess my self a more preternotorious rogue than himself, in so long keeping his villainous counsell.
Foro. Come, come, I will not hear you.
Clow. No couz'ner, thou wouldest not hear me, I do but dare thee to suffer me to speak, and then thou and all thy divells spit fire, and spout Aqua fortis.
Foro. Speak on, I freely permit thee.
Clow. Why then know all you simple animals, you whose purses are ready to cast the calf; if they have not cast it already, if you give any credit to this jugling rascal, you are worse than simple widgins, and will be drawn into the net by this decoy duck, this tame cheater.
Foro. Ha, ha, ha, pray mark him.
Clow. He does profess Physicke, and counjuring; for his Physick; he has but two medicines for all manner of diseases; when he was i'th' low countryes, he us'd nothing but butter'd beer, colour'd with Allegant, for all kind of maladies, and that he called his catholick med'cine; sure the Dutch smelt out it was butter'd beer, else they would never have endur'd it for the names sake: then does he minister a grated Dogs turd instead of Rubarb, many times of Unicornes horn, which working strongly with the conceit of the Patient, would make them bescummer to the height of a mighty purgation.
Foro. The rogue has studied this invective.
Clow. Now for his conjuring, the witches of Lapland are the divells chare-women to him, for they will sell a man a wind to some purpose; he sells wind, and tells you fortie lyes over and over.
Hostess. I thought what we should find of him.
Host. Hold your prating, be not you an heretick.
Clow. Conjure! I'll tell you, all the divells names he calls upon are but fustion names, gather'd out of welch heraldry; in breif, he is a rogue of six reprieves, four pardons of course, thrice pilloried, twice sung Lacrymæ to the Virginalls of a carts tail, h'as five times been in the Gallies, and will never truely run himself out of breath, till he comes to the gallowes.
Foro. You have heard worthy gentlemen, what this lying, detracting rascall has vomited.
Tay. Yes certain, but we have a better trust in you, for you have ta'en our money.
Foro. I have so, truth is he was my servant, and for some chastisement I gave him, he does practise thus upon me; speak truely sirra, are you certain I cannot conjure?
Clow. Conjure! ha, ha, ha.
Foro. Nay, nay, but be very sure of it.
Clow. Sure of it? why I'll make a bargain with thee, before all these gentlemen, use all thy art, all thy roguery, and make me do any thing before al this company I have not a mind to, I'll first give thee leave to claime me for thy bond slave, and when thou hast done hang me.
Foro. 'Tis a match, sirra, I'll make you caper i'th' air presently.
Clow. I have too solid a body, and my belief is like a Puritans on Good-Friday, too high fed with capon.
Foro. I will first send thee to Green-land for a haunch of venison, just of the thickness of thine own tallow.
Clow. Ha, ha, ha, I'll not stir an inch for thee.
Foro. Thence to Amboyna i'th' East-Indies, for pepper to bake it.
Clow. To Amboyna? so I might be pepper'd.
Foro. Then will I conveigh thee stark naked to Develing to beg a pair of brogs, to hide thy mountainous buttocks.
Clow. And no doublet to 'em?
Foro. No sir, I intend to send you of a sleeveless errand; but before you vanish, in regard you say I cannot conjure, and are so stupid, and opinionated a slave, that neither I, nor my art can compell you to do any thing that's beyond your own pleasure, the gentlemen shall have some sport, you cannot endure a cat sirra?
Clow. What's that to thee Jugler?
Foro. Nor you'll do nothing at my entreaty?
Clow. I'll be hang'd first.
Foro. Sit Gentlemen, and whatsoever you see, be not frighted.
Hostess. Alas I can endure no conjuring.
Host. Stir not wife.
Bian. Pray let me go sir, I am not fit for these fooleryes.
Host. Move not daughter.
For. I wil make you dance a new dance call'd leap-frog.
Clow. Ha, ha, ha.
For. And as naked as a frog.
Clow. Ha, ha, ha, I defie thee.
[Forobosco looks in a book, strikes with his wand, Musick playes.
Enter 4. Boyes shaped like Frogs, and dance.
P[e]dant. Spirits of the water in the likeness of frogs.
Tay. He has fisht fair believe me.
Mule. See, see, he sweats and trembles.
Foro. Are you come to your quavers?
Clow. Oh, ho, ho.
Foro. I'll make you run division on that o'r ere I leave you; looke you, here are the playfellowes that are so indear'd to you; come sir, first uncase, and then dance, nay I'll make him dance stark naked.
Host. Oh let him have his shirt on and his Mogols breeches, here are Women ith' house.
Foro. Well for their sakes he shall.
[Clown teares off his doublet, making strange faces as if compel'd to it, falls into the Dance.
Tay. He dances, what a lying rogue was this to say the gentleman could not conjure!
Foro. He does prettily well, but 'tis voluntary, I assure you, I have no hand in't.
Clow. As you are a Counjurer, and a rare Artist, free me from these couplets; of all creatures I cannot endure a Frog.
Foro. But your dancing is voluntary, I can compell you to nothing.
Hostes. O me, daughter, lets take heed of this fellow, he'll make us dance naked, an' we vex him. [—Exeunt Hostess and Bianca.
Foro. Now cut capers sirra, I'll plague that chine of yours.
Clow. Ho, ho, ho, my kidneys are rosted. I drop away like a pound of butter rosted.
Tayl. He will dance himself to death.
Foro. No matter I'll sell his fat to the Pothecaries, and repair my injury that way.
Host. Enough in conscience.
Foro. Well, at your entreaty vanish. And now I wil only make him break his neck in doing a sommerset, and that's all the revenge I mean to take of him.
Clow. O gentlemen, what a rogue was I to belye so an approved Master in the noble dark science? you can witness, this I did only to spoyle his practise and deprive you of the happyness of injoying his worthy labors; rogue that I was to do it, pray sir forgive me.
Foro. With what face canst thou ask it?
Clow. With such a face as I deserve, with a hanging look, as all here can testifie.
Foro. Well gentlemen, that you may perceive the goodness of my temper, I will entertain this rogue againe in hope of amendment, for should I turn him off, he would be hang'd.
Clow. You may read that in this foul coppy.
Foro. Only with this promise, you shall never cozen any of my patients.
Clow. Never.
Foro. And remember hence forward, that though I cannot conjure, I can make you dance sirra, go get your self into the cottage again.
Enter Cæsario.
Clow. I will never more dance leap-Frog: now I have got you into credit, hold it up, and cozen them in abundance.
Foro. Oh rare rascall. [—Exit Clown.
Cesar. How now, a Frankford mart here, a Mountebank, and his worshipfull auditory?
Host. They are my guests Sir.
Cesar. A —— upon them, shew your jugling tricks in some other room.
Host. And why not here Sir?
Cesar. Hence, or sirra I shall spoil your figure flinging, and all their radicall questions.
Omnes. Sir we vanish. [Exeunt. Manet Host. & Cesar.
Host. Signior Cesario, you make bold with me,
And somewhat I must tell you to a degree
Of ill manners: they are my guests, and men I live by,
And I would know by what authority
You command thus far.
Cesar. By my interest in your daughter.
Host. Interest do you call't? as I remember I never put
her out to Usury on that condition.
Cesar. Pray thee be not angry.
Enter Bianca and Hostess.
I am come to make thee happy, and her happy:
She's here; alas my pretty soul, I am come
To give assurance that's beyond thy hope,
Or thy beleif, I bring repentance 'bout me,
And satisfaction, I will marry thee.
Bianca. Ha?
Cesar. As I live I will, but do not entertain't
With too quick an apprehension of joy,
For that may hurt thee, I have heard some dye of't.
Bian. Do not fear me.
Cesar. Then thou think'st I feign
This protestation, I will instantly
Before these testifie my new alliance,
Contract my self unto thee, then I hope
We may be more private.
Host. But thou shalt not sir,
For so has many a maiden-head been lost, and many a bastard gotten.
Ces. Then to give you the best of any assurance in the world,
Entreat thy father to go fetch a Preist
Wee will instantly to bed, and there be married.
Bian. Pride hath not yet forsaken you I see,
Though prosperity has.
Host. Sir you are too confident
To fashion to your self a dream of purchase
When you are a begger.
Ces. You are bold with me.
Hostes. Doe we not know your value is cried down
Fourscore i'th' hundred.
Bian. Oh sir I did love you
With such a fixed heart, that in that minute
Wherein you slighted, or contemn'd me rather,
I took a vow to obey your last decree,
And never more look up at any hope
Should bring me comfort that way: and though since
Your Foster-mother, and the fair Clarissa
Have in the way of marriage despis'd you,
That hath not any way bred my revenge,
But compassion rather. I have found
So much sorrow in the way to a chaste wedlock
That here I will set down, and never wish
To come to'th' journies end. Your suit to mee
Henceforth be ever silenc'd.
Cesar. My Bianca.
Hostes. Henceforward pray forbear her and my house:
She's a poor virtuous wench, yet her estate
May weigh with yours in a gold balance.
Host. Yes, and her birth in any Heralds office in
Christendom.
Hostes. It may prove so:
When you'll say, you have leapt a Whiting. [Exit.
Enter Baptista and Mentivole.
Ces. How far am I grown behind hand with fortune!
Bap. Here's Cesario!
My son Sir, is to morrow to be married
Unto the fair Clarissa.
Ces. So.
Ment. Wee hope you'll be a guest there.
Ces. No I will not grace your triumph so much.
Bap. I will not tax your breeding.
But it alters not your birth Sir, fare you well.
Ment. Oh Sir, doe not greive him,
He has too much affliction already. [Exeunt.
Enter a Sailor.
Ces. Every way scorn'd and lost,
Shame follow you
For I am grown most miserable.
Sail. Sir do you know a Ladies son in town here
They cal Cesario?
Cesar. There's none such I assure thee.
Sail. I was told you were the man.
Cesar. What's that to thee?
Sail. A —— on't. You are melancholy, will you drink Sir?
Cesar. With whom?
Sail. With me Sir; despise not this pitch'd Canvas; the
time was we have known them lin'd with Spanish Duckets;
I have news for you:
Cesar. For me!
Sail. Not unless you'll drink;
We are like our Sea provision, once out of pickle,
We require abundance of drink; I have news to tell you,
That were you Prince,
Would make you send your mandate
To have a thousand bonfires made i'th' City
And pist out agen with nothing but Greek wine.
Cesar. Come, I will drink with thee howsoever.
Sail. And upon these terms I will utter my mind to you. [Exeunt.
Actus Quintus. Scæna Prima.
Enter Alberto, Prospero, Juliana and Sailors.
Sail.
Shall we bring your necessaries ashore my Lord?
Alb. Do what you please, I am land-sick, worse by far
Than ere I was at sea.
Pros. Collect your self.
Alber. O my most worthy Prospero, my best friend,
The noble favor I receiv'd from thee
In freeing me from the Turks I now accompt
Worse than my death; for I shall never live
To make requitall; what do you attend for?
Sail. To understand your pleasure.
Alber. They do mock me;
I do protest I have no kind of pleasure
In any thing i'th' world, but in thy friendship,
I must ever except that.
Pros. Pray leave him, leave him.—— [Exeunt Sailors.
Alber. The news I heard related since my landing
Of the division of my Family,
How is it possible for any man
To bear't with a set patience?
Pros. You have suffer'd
Since your imprisonment more waighty sorrows.
Alber. I, then I was man of flesh and blood,
Now I am made up of fire, to the full height
Of a deadly Calenture; O these vild women
That are so ill preservers of mens honors,
They cannot govern their own honesties.
That I should thirty and odd winters feed
My expectation of a noble heir,
And by a womans falshood find him now
A fiction, a mere dream of what he was;
And yet I love him still.
Pros. In my opinion
The sentence (on this tryall) from the Duke
Was noble, to repair Cesario's loss
With the marriage of your wife, had you been dead.
Alber. By your favor but it was not, I conceive
T'was disparagement to my name, to have my widdow
Match with a Faulkeiners son, and yet beli've't
I love the youth still, and much pitty him.
I do remember at my going to Sea,
Upon a quarrel, and a hurt receiv'd
From young Mentivole, my rage so far
Oretopt my nobler temper, I gave charge
To have his hand cut off, which since I heard,
And to my comfort, brave Cesario,
Worthyly prevented.
Pros. And 'twas nobly done.
Albert Yet the revenge, for this intent of mine
Hath bred much slaughter in our families,
And yet my wife (which infinitely moans me)
Intends to marry my sole heir Clarissa
To the head branch of the other faction.
Pros. 'Tis the mean to work reconcilement.
Alber. Between whom?
Pros. Your self and the worthy Baptista.
Pros. O you have been of a noble and remarkable friendship,
And by this match 'tis generally in Florence
Hop'd, 'twill fully be reconcil'd; to me
'Twould be absolute content.
Julia. And to my self, I have main interest in it.
Alb. Noble Sir, you may command my heart to break for you
But never to bend that way; poor Cesario,
When thou put'st on thy mournfull willow-garland,
Thy enemy shall be suted (I do vow)
In the same livery, my Cesario
Loved as my foster child, though not my Son,
Which in some countryes formerly were barbarous,
Was a name held most affectionate; thou art lost,
Unfortunate young man, not only slighted
Where thou received'st thy breeding, but since scorn'd
I th' way of marriage, by the poor Bianca
The In-keepers daughter.
Pros. I have heard of that too;
But let not that afflict you: for this Lady
May happily deliver at more leasure
A circumstance may draw a fair event,
Better than you can hope for.
For this present we must leave you,
And shall visit you again within these two hours.
----Enter Cesario.
Albert. Ever to me most welcome,——O my Cesario.
Cesar. I am none of yours Sir, so 'tis protested;
And I humbly beg,
Since 'tis not in your power to preserve me
Any longer in a noble course of life,
Give me a worthy death.
Alber. The youth is mad.
Cesar. Nay Sir, I will instruct you in a way
To kill me honorably.
Alber. That were most strange.
Cesar. I am turning Pirate, You may be imployed
By the Duke to fetch me in; and in a Sea-fight
Give me a noble grave.
Alber. Questionless he's mad: I would give any Doctor
A thousand crowns to free him from this sorrow.
Cesar. Here's the Physitian.——Shewes a Poniard.
Alber. Hold Sir, I did say
To free you from the sorrow, not from life.
Cesar. Why life and sorrow are unseparable.
Alber. Be comforted Cesario, Mentivole
Shall not marry Clarissa.
Cesar. No Sir, ere he shall, I'll kill him.
Alb[e]r. But you forfeit your own life then.
Cesar. That's worth nothing.
Alber. Cesario, be thy self, be mine Cesario:
Make not thy self uncapable of that portion
I have full purpose to confer upon thee,
By falling into madness: bear thy wrongs
With noble patience, the afflicted's friend
Which ever in all actions crowns the end.
Ces. You well awak'd me; nay recover'd me
Both to sence and full life, O most noble sir,
Though I have lost my fortune, and lost you
For a worthy Father: yet I will not lose
My former virtue, my integrity
Shall not yet forsake me; but as the wild Ivy,
Spreads and thrives better in some pittious ruin
Of tower, or defac'd Temple, than it does
Planted by a new building; so shall I
Make my adversity my instrument
To winde me up into a full content.
Alber. 'Tis worthily resolv'd; our first adventure
Is to stop the marriage; for thy other losses,
Practis'd by a womans malice, but account them
Like conjurers winds rais'd to a fearfull blast,
And do some mischeif, but do never last. [Exeunt.
Enter Forobosco and Clown.
Clow. Now sir, will you not acknowledge that I have mightily advanc'd your practice?
Forobos. 'Tis confest, and I will make thee a great man for't.
Clow. I take a course to do that my self, for I drink sack in abundance.
Foro. O my rare rascall! We must remove.
Clow. Whither?
Foro. Any whither: Europe is too little to be coz'ned by us, I am ambitious to go to the East-Indies, thou and I to ride on our brace of Elephants.
Clow. And for my part I long to be in England agen; you will never get so much as in England, we have shifted many countryes, and many names: but trance the world over you shall never purse up so much gold as when you were in England, and call'd your self Doctor Lambe-stones.
Foro. 'Twas an atractive name I confess, women were then my only admirers.
Clow. And all their visits was either to further their lust, or revenge injuries.
Foro. You should have forty in a morning beleaguer my closet, and strive who should be cozen'd first, amongst four-score love-sick waiting women that has come to me in a morning to learn what fortune should betide them in their first marriage, I have found above 94 to have lost their maiden-heads.
Clow. By their own confession, but I was fain to be your male midwife, and work it out of them by circumstance.
Foro. Thou wast, and yet for all this frequent resort of women and thy hand[l]ing of their urinals and their cases, thou art not given to lechery, what should be the reason of it? thou hast wholsome flesh enough about thee; me thinks the divell should tempt thee to't.
Clow. What need he do that, when he makes me his instrument to tempt others.
Foro. Thou canst not chuse but utter thy rare good parts; thou wast an excellent baud I acknowledge.
Clow. Well, and what I have done that way, I will spare to speak of all you and I have done sir, and though we should—
Foro. We will for England, that's for certain.
Clow. We shall never want there.
Foro. Want? their Court of Wards shall want money first: for I profess my self Lord Paramount over fools a[n]d madfolkes.
Clow. Do but store your self with lyes enough against you come thither.
Foro. Why that's all the familiarity I ever had with the Divell, my guift of lying, they say he's the Father of lyes; and though I cannot conjure, yet I profess my self to be one of his poor gossips. I will now reveale to thee a rare peece of service.
Clow. What is it my most worshipful Doctor Lamb-stones?
Foro. There is a Captain come lately from Sea,
They call Prosper, I saw him this morning
Through a chink of wainscote that divides my lodging,
And the Host of the house, withdraw my Host, and Hostess, the fair Biancha, and an antient gentlewoman into their bedchamber; I could not overhear their conference, but I saw such a mass of gold & Jewels, & when he had done he lock't it up into a casket; great joy there was amongst them, & forth they are gone into the city, and my Host told me at his going forth he thought he should not return till after supper: now Sir, in their absence will we fall to our picklocks, enter the chamber, seize the Jewels, make an escape from Florence, and we are made for ever.
Clow. But if they should go to a true conjurer, and fetch us back in a whirle-wind?
Foro. Do not believe there is any such fetch in Astrology, and this may be a means to make us live honest hereafter.
Clow. 'Tis but an ill road to't that lyes through the high way of theeving.
Foro. For indeed I am weary of this trade of fortune-telling; and mean to give all over, when I come into England, for it is a very ticklish quality.
Clow. And i'th' end will hang by a twine thred.
Foro. Besides the Island has too many of the profession, they hinder on[e] anothers market.
Clow. No, no, the pillory hinders their market.
Foro. You know there the jugling captain.
Clow. I there's a sure card.
Foro. Only the fore-man of their jury is dead, but he dyed like a Roman.
Clow. Else 'tis thought he had made work for the hangman.
Foro. And the very Ball, of your false prophets, he's quasht too.
Clow. He did measure the stars with a false yard, and may now travail to Rome, with a morter on's head to see if he can recover his money that way.
Foro. Come, come, lets fish for this casket, and to Sea presently.
Clow. We shall never reach London, I fear;
My mind runs so much of hanging, landing at Wapping. [Exeunt.
Enter Mariana.
This well may be a day of joy long wish'd for
To my Clarissa, she is innocent.
Nor can her youth but with an open bosome
Meet Hymens pleasing bounties, but to me
That am inviron'd with black guilt and horror
It does appear a funeral though promising much
In the conception were hard to mannage
But sad in [the] event, it was not hate
But fond indulgence in me to preserve
Cesario's threatn'd life in open court
Then forc'd me to disclaime him, choosing rather
To rob him of his birthright, and honor
Than suffer him to run the hazard of
Inrag'd Baptista's fury, while he lives;
I know I have a Son, and the Dukes sentence
A while deluded, and this tempest over,
When he assures himself despair hath seiz'd him. [Knock within.
Enter Baptista.
I can relieve and raise him—speak, who is it
That presses on my privacies? Sir your pardon.
You cannot come unwelcome, though it were
To read my secret thoughts.
Bap. Lady to you
Mine shall be ever open; Lady said I,
That name keeps too much distance, sister rather
I should have stil'd you, and I now may claime it,
Since our divided families are made one
By this blessed marriage; to whose honor comes
The Duke in person, waited on by all
The braveries of his Court, to witness it,
And then to be our ghests, is the bride ready
To meet and entertain him?
Maria. She attends the comming of your Son.
Bap. Pray you bring her forth.
The Duke's at hand—Musick, in her loud voyce,
Speaks his arrivall.
Maria. She's prepar'd to meet it. [—Exit.
Enter Mariana, Clarissa, led by two Maids: at the other door, Baptista meets with Mentivole, led by two Cour[t]iers, the Duke, Bishop; divers Attendants: (A Song) whilst they salute.
Duke. It were impertinent to wish you joy,
Since all joyes dwell about you, Hymens torch
Was never lighted with a luckier Omen.
Nor burnt with so much splendor, to defer
With fruitless compliment, the means to make
Your certain pleasures lawful to the world;
Since in the union of your hearts they are
Confirm'd already: would but argue us
A boaster of our favours; to the Temple,
And there the sacred knot once ti'd, all triumphs
Our Dukedom can afford, shall grace your Nuptials.
Enter Alberto and Cesario.
Bap. On there.
Ment. I hope it is not in the power
Of any to cross us now.
Alber. But in the breath
Of a wrong'd Father I forbid the Banes.
Cesar. What, do you stand at gaze?
Bap. Risen from the dead!
Maria. Although the Sea had vomited up the Figure
In which thy better part liv'd long imprison'd,
True love despising fear, runs thus to meet it.
Claris. In duty I kneel to it.
Alber. Hence vile wretches,
To you I am a substance incorporeal,
And not to be prophan'd, with your vile touch?
That could so soon forget me, but such things
Are neither worth my Anger, nor reproof.
To you great Sir, I turn my self and these
Immediate Ministers of your Government,
And if in my rude language I transgress;
Ascribe it to the cold remembrance of
My services, and not my rugged temper.
Duke. Speak freely, be thy language ne'er so bitter,
To see thee safe Alberto, signes thy pardon.
Alber. My pardon? I can need none, if it be not
Receiv'd for an offence. I tamely bear
Wrongs, which a slave-born Muscovite would check at.
Why if for Treason I had been deliver'd
Up to the Hangmans Axe, and this dead trunk
Unworthy of a Christian Sepulchre;
Expos'd a prey to feed the ravenous Vulture,
The memory of the much I oft did for you,
Had you but any touch of gratitude,
Or thought of my deservings, would have stopp'd you
From these unjust proceedings.
Duke. Hear the motives that did induce us.
Alber. I have heard them all,
Your Highness sentence, the whole Court abus'd,
By the perjuries and practice of this woman.
(Wepest thou Crocodile) my hopeful son,
Whom I dare swear mine own, degraded of
The honors that descend to him from me:
And from that, in his love scorn'd by a creature
Whose base birth, though made eminent by her beauty,
Might well have mark'd her out Cesario's servant,
All this I could have pardon'd and forgot;
But that my daughter with my whole Estate
So hardly purchas'd, is assign'd a Dower;
To one whose Father, and whose Family
I so detest; that I would lose my essence
And be transformed to a Basiliske
To look them dead, to me's an injury
Admits no satisfaction.
Alber. Nor would not be accepted,
Though upon thy knees 'twere tender'd.
Maria. Now the storm grows high.
Bap. But that I thought thee dead, and in thy death
The brinie Ocean had entomb'd thy name;
I would have sought a Wife in a Bordello
For my Mentivole, and gladly hugg'd
Her spurious issue as my lawful Nephews,
Before his blood should e'er have mix'd with thine;
So much I scorn it.
Alber. I'll not bandy words, but thus dissolve the contract.
Bap. There I meet thee, and seize on what's mine own.
Alber. For all my service,
Great Sir, grant me the combat with this wretch,
That I may scourge his insolence.
Bap. I kneel for it.
Cesar. And to approve my self Alberto's Son,
I'll be his second upon any odds,
'Gainst him that dare most of Baptista's race.
Menti. Already upon honourable terms,
In me thou hast met thy better, for her sake
I'll add no more.
Alber. Sir, let our swords decide it.
Maria. Oh stay Sir, and as you would hold the Title
Of a just Prince, e'r you grant licence to
These mad-mens fury, lend your private ear
To the most distress'd of Women.
Duke. Speak, 'tis granted. [He takes Mariana aside.
Clar. In the mean time, let not Clarissa be
A patient looker on, though as yet doubtful,
To whom to bend her knee first, yet to all
I stoop thus low in duty, and would wash
The dust of fury with my Virgin tears,
From his bless'd feet, and make them beautiful
That would move to conditions of peace,
Though with a snail-like pace, they all are wing'd
To bear you to destruction: reverend Sirs,
Think on your antient friendship cemented
With so much bloud, but shed in noble action,
Divided now in passion for a brawl;
The Makers blush to own, much lov'd Cesario.
Brother, or friend, (each Title may prevail,)
Remember with what tenderness from our childhood
We lov'd together, you preferring me
Before your self, and I so fond of you
That it begot suspition in ill minds
That our affection was incestuous.
Think of that happy time, in which I know
That with your dearest bloud you had prevented
This shower of tears from me; Mentivole,
My Husband, registred in that bright star-chamber,
Though now on earth made strangers, be the example
And offer in one hand the peaceful Olive
Of concord, or if that can be denied
By powerful intercession in the other
Carry the Hermian rod, and force attonement,
Now we will not be all marble. Death's the worst then
And he shall be my Bridegroom. [Offers to kill her self.
Ment. Hold Clarissa, his loving violence needs must
Offer in spite of honor.— [He snatches away her knife, and sets it to his own breast, she staies his hand.
Duke. Was it to that end then on your Religion?
Mar. And my hope in Heaven, Sir.
Duke. We then will leave intreaties, and make use
Of our authority, must I cry ai-me
To this unheard of insolence? in my presence
To draw your swords, and as all reverence
That's due to Majesty were forfeited,
Cherish this wildeness! sheath them instantly,
And shew an alteration in your looks, or by my power.
Alber. Cut off my head.
Bap. And mine, rather than hear of peace with this bad man.
I'll not alone, give up my throat, but suffer
Your rage to reach my family.
Enter Prospero, Juliana, Biancha.
Alb. And my name to be no more remembred.
Ces. Biancha, 'tis Biancha, still Biancha: but strangely
alter'd.
Bapt. If that thirteen years
Of absence could raze from my memory
The figure of my friend, I might forget thee;
But if thy Image be graven on my heart,
Thou art my Prospero.
Pros. Thou my Baptista?
Duke. A suddain change!
Bap. I dare not ask, dear friend
If Juliana live! for that's a blessing
I am unworthy of, but yet denie not
To let me know the place she hath made happy
By having there her Sepulchre.
Pros. If your Highness please to vouchsafe a patient
Ear, we shall make a true relation of a story
That shall call on your wonder.
Duke. Speak, we hear you.
Pros. Baptista's fortune in the Genoua Court,
His banishment, with his fair Wife's restraint
You are acquainted with; what since hath follow'd
I faithfully will deliver. E'r eight Moons
After Baptista's absence were compleat,
Fair Juliana found the pleasures, that
They had injoy'd together, were not barren,
And blushing at the burthen of her womb,
No father near to own it, it drew on
A violent sickness, which call'd down compassion
From the angry Duke, then careful of her health.
Physitians were enquir'd of, and their judgment
Prescrib'd the Baths of Luca as a means
For her recovery; to my charge it pleas'd her
To be committed; but as on the way
We journey'd, those throws only known to Women
Came thick upon her, in a private Village.
Bap. She died?
Pros. Have patience, she brought to the world
A hopeful Daughter; for her bodies sickness
It soon decay'd, but the grief of her mind
Hourly increas'd, and life grew tedious to her,
And desperate e'er to see you; she injoyn'd me
To place her in a Greekish Monastery,
And to my care gave up her pretty Daughter.
Bapt. What Monastery? as a Pilgrim bare-foot,
I'll search it out.
Pros. Pray you interrupt me not,
Now to my fortunes; the girl well dispos'd of
With a faithful friend of mine, my cruel fate
Made me a prisoner to the Turkish Gallies,
Where for 12 years, these hands tugg'd at the Oar,
But fortune tyr'd at length with my afflictions,
Some Ships of Maltha met the Ottoman Fleet,
Charg'd them, and boarded them, and gave me freedom.
With my deliverers I serv'd, and got
Such reputation with the great Master
That he gave me command over a tall
And lusty ship, where my first happy service
Was to redeem Alberto rumour'd dead,
But was like me surpriz'd by Cortugogly.
Alber. I would I had died there.
Pros. And from him learning
Baptista liv'd, and their dissolv'd friendship,
I hois'd up sails for Greece, found Juliana
A votary at her Beads; having made known
Both that you liv'd, and where you were: she borrow'd
So much from her devotion, as to wish me
To bring her to you; if the object please you,
With joy receive her.
Bapt. Rage and fury leave me. [Throws away his sword.
I am so full of happiness, there's no room left
To entertain you, oh my long lost Jewel,
Light of mine eyes, my souls strength.
Julia. My best Lord, having embrac'd you thus,
Death cannot fright me.
Bapt. Live long to do so, though I should fix here.
Pardon me Prospero, though I enquire my daughters fortune.
Pros. That your happiness
May be at all parts perfect, here she is!
Ces. Biancha, daughter to a Princess.
Pros. True with my faithful Host I left her,
And with him till now she hath resided,
Ignorant both of her birth and greatness.
Bap. Oh my blest one. Joy upon joy o'erwhelms me.
Duke. Above wonder.
Alb. I do begin to melt too, this strange story
Works much upon me.
Duke. Since it hath pleas'd heaven
To grace us with this miracle, I that am
Heavens instrument here, determine thus; Alberto
Be not unthankful for the blessings shown you,
Nor you Baptista; discord was yet never
A welcome sacrifice; therefore rage laid by,
Embrace as friends, and let pass'd difference
Be as a dream forgotten.
Bap. 'Tis to me.
Alber. And me, and thus confirm it.
Duke. And to tye it
In bonds not to be broken, with the marriage
Of young Mentivole, and fair Clarissa,
So you consent great Lady, your Biancha
Shall call Cæsario Husband.
Julia. 'Tis a motion I gladly yield to.
Cesar. One in which you make a sad man happy. [Offers to kneel.
Bian. Kneel not, all forgiven.
Duke. With the Duke your Uncle I will make attonement, and will have no denial.
Enter Host, Forobosco, Clown and Officers.
Mar. Let this day be still held sacred.
Host. Now if you can conjure, let the Devil unbind you.
Foro. We are both undone.
Clow. Already we feel it.
Host. Justice Sir.
Duke. What are they?
Pros. I can resolve you, slaves freed from the Gallies
By the Viceroy of Sicilia.
Duke. What's their offence?
Host. The robbing me of all my Plate and Jewels, I mean the attempting of it.
Clow. Please your Grace I will now discover this Varlet in earnest, this honest pestilent rogue, profest the Art of Conjuring, but all the skill that ever he had in the black Art, was in making a Seacole fire; only with wearing strange shapes, he begot admiration amongst Fools and Women.
Foro. Wilt thou peach thou varlet?
Duke. Why does he goggle with his eyes, and stalke so?
Clow. This is one of his Magical raptures.
Foro. I do vilifie your censure, you demand if I am guilty, whir says my cloak by a trick of Legerdemain, now I am not guilty, I am guarded with innocence, pure Silver Lace I assure you.
Clow. Thus have I read to you your virtues, which notwithstanding I would not have you proud of.
Foro. Out thou concealment of Tallow, and counterfeit Mummia.
Duke. To the Gallies with them both.
Clow. The only Sea-physick for a knave, is to be basted in a Gally, with the oil of a Bulls Peesel.
Foro. And will not you make a sour face at the same sauce, sirrah? I hope to find thee so lean in one fortnight, thou mayst be drawn by the ears through the hoop of [a] firkin.
Duke. Divide them, and away with them to th' Gallies.
Clow. This will take down your pride, Jugler.
Duke. This day that hath given birth to blessings beyond hope, admits no criminal sentence: to the Temple, and there with humbleness, praise heavens bounties;
For blessings ne'er descend from thence, but when
A sacrifice in thanks ascends from men. [Exeunt omnes.