ONE SIDE OF THE FINANCIAL QUESTION BETWEEN MAN AND WIFE
The philosophy of clothes is a serious study, and instead of being frowned upon by men, who invariably associate it with wild extravagance, it should be incorporated as first among the bylaws of home life. Women in many cases are largely responsible for the troubles and misunderstandings which arise, brought about, as they often are, on the very threshold of married life.
When a husband admires the stylish appearance of his bride’s traveling gown she is apt to be tempted by the irresponsible imp of mischief to answer, “It cost but a trifle.” In fact, she may burst out with the fiction that she “never spends money on gowns.” This small and unnecessary explosion may win her a tithe of praise at the moment; but it also paves the way for an embarrassing future if she proposes to live up to the fairy tale.
It is curious that the most honest, frank, and truthful women will often hesitate or even fib when asking for domestic expenses, and the most generous and loyal fellow in the world, who lives to spend his dollars like the farmer sows his wheat, looks “concerned,” to be mild in our expression, when the woman whom he loves and trusts looks to him for the weekly stipend.
The wife of a millionaire, who never made anything but her own complexion, boasted that her husband was under the impression that she designed and made her own gowns and bonnets. This she had told him on their wedding journey, and she could never pluck up courage to undeceive him.
A little honesty at the start would make the financial side of matrimony much more pleasant; hence it is difficult to understand why a woman prevaricates when the broad way of truth is easier—unless, indeed, she be tied to a man who “rows” every time money is mentioned.
Perhaps he doesn’t mean it. So few of them understand that the very need of asking hurts and humiliates, even grieves, a proud woman.
A fine, jolly man rallied his wife once on her diffidence in this manner: “Ashamed to come to me for anything? Nonsense! You can come to me as you go to God.” And he never realized the supreme egotism of his speech. So long as she did not smile over it, all went well.
Women hesitate to discuss unpleasant matters with their husbands, and at an early stage they are made to feel that money is an extremely unpleasant subject. Hence they resort to all sorts of foolish subterfuges to obtain possession without open speech. This does not class them among deceivers. A woman is simply more careful than a man in her methods, fearing she will give offence.
Nature sets us an example for “all things new.” She never wears the castaway leaves of past seasons. There is no remade foliage on the trees, no flaunting of spring colors in November. The late skies are veiled in tints the summer never saw and the earth in her old age is as changeful as a merry maid in her teens.
The influence of dress is greater than we will acknowledge. We feel better, act better and bring more honor to those who love us when we are properly gowned. An ill-dressed woman may possess the wisdom of a sage, or the beauty of a goddess; but among her sisters she is at a tremendous disadvantage unless she is like unto them in the glory of her raiment.