III
“Nurse will rise at four and bring you a nice cup of tea. Are you sure you will not weary, being alone for two hours?” and Mrs. Marsden, in charming outdoor dress, blew eau-de-Cologne about the room. “Don't you love scent?”
“Where are you going?” asked Marsden, following her with fond eyes. “You told me yesterday, but I forget; this illness has made me stupider than ever, I think. Wasn't it some charity?”
“It's the new society every one is so interested in, 'The Working Wives' Culture Union.' What is wanted is happy homes for the working men,” quoting freely from an eloquent woman orator, “and the women must be elevated; so the East End is to be divided into districts, and two young women will be allotted to each. Are you listening?”
“Yes, dear; but it rests me to lie with my eyes closed. Tell me all about your society. What are the young ladies to do?”
“Oh, they're to visit the wives in the afternoon and read books to them: solid books, you know, about wages and... all kinds of things working men like. Then in the evening the wives will be able to talk with their husbands on equal terms, and the men will not want to go to the public-houses. Isn't it a capital idea?”
A sad little smile touched Marsden's lips for an instant “And where do you meet to-day? It's a long way for you to go to Whitechapel.”
“Didn't I tell you? The Marchioness of Gloucester Is giving a Drawing Room at her town house, and Lady Helen wrote an urgent note, Insisting that I should come, even though it were only for an hour, as her mother depended on my advice so much.
“Of course I know that's just a way of putting it; but I have taken lots of trouble about founding the Union, so I think it would hardly do for me to be absent You're feeling much better, too, to-day, aren't you, Thomas?”
“Yes, much better; the pain has almost ceased; perhaps it will be quite gone when you return. Can you spare just ten minutes to sit beside me? There is something I have been wanting to say, and perhaps this is my only chance. When I am well again I may... be afraid.”
Mrs. Marsden sat down wondering, and her husband waited a minute.
“One understands many things that puzzled him before, when he lies in quietness for weeks and takes an after look. I suspected it at times before, but I was a coward and put the thought away. It seemed curious that no one came to spend an hour with me, as men do with friends; and I noticed that they appeared to avoid me. I thought it was fancy, and that I had grown self-conscious.
“Everything is quite plain now, and I... am not hurt, dear, and I don't blame any person; that would be very wrong. People might have been far more impatient with me, and might have made my life miserable.
“God gave me a dull mind and a slow tongue; it took me a long time to grasp anything, and no one cared about the subjects that interested me. Beatrice... I wish now you had told me how I bored our friends; it would have been a kindness; but never mind that now; you did not like to give me pain.
“What troubles me most is that all these years you should have been tied to a very tiresome fellow,” and Marsden made some poor attempt at a smile. “Had I thought of what was before you, I would never have asked you to marry me.
“Don't cry, dear; I did not wish to hurt you. I wanted to ask your pardon for... all that martyrdom, and... to thank you for... being my wife; and there's something else.
“You see when I get well and am not lying in bed here, maybe I could not tell you, so let me explain everything now, and then we need not speak about such things again.
“Perhaps you thought me too economical, but I was saving for a purpose. Your portion has not brought quite so much as it did, and I wished to make it up to you, and now you can have your six hundred a year as before; if this illness had gone against me, you would have been quite comfortable—in money, I mean, dear.
“No, I insist on your going to Lady Gloucester's; the change will do you good, and I'll lie here digesting the Reformation, you know,” and he smiled, better this time, quite creditably, in fact “Will you give me a kiss, just to keep till we meet again?”
When the nurse came down at four to take charge, she was horrified to find her patient alone, and in the death agony, but conscious and able to speak.
“Don't ring... nor send for my wife... I sent... her away knowing the end was near... made her go, in fact... against her will.”
The nurse gave him brandy, and he became stronger for a minute.
“She has had a great deal to bear with me, and I... did not wish her to see death. My manner has been always so wearisome... I hoped that... nobody would be here. You are very kind, nurse; no more, if you please.
“Would it trouble you... to hold my hand, nurse? It's a little lonely... I am not afraid... a wayfaring man though a fool... not err therein...”
He was not nearly so tedious with his dying as he had been with his living; very shortly afterwards Thomas Marsden had done with statistics for ever.