LETTER XX.
“So I spake unto the people in the morning, and at even my wife died.”—Ezek. xxiv. 18.
To —
Death is solemn at all times, to thinking minds; and though sin has made him an enemy to our natures, grace has made him a friend to our souls: but he has no acquaintances, nor has he respect for any; he comes in without apologies, and cuts down all alike, the man of years, the innocent babe, the crowned head, the mitred prelate, the humble scavenger, and the poorest beggar: nor does he spare the dearest relative, or the most affectionate friend—yet, it is the consolation of the Lord’s people, that though all must bow to his stroke, they are dear to the Saviour, they are precious to him; hence he calls them the precious sons of Zion, and since thou hast been precious in my sight, I have loved thee. God has declared their blood, that it their lives, is precious in his sight.—Psalm lxxii. And in another Psalm (cxvi.) declares their very death is precious. God has declared, he has no pleasure in the death of the wicked, no more than he has in their persons or their lives; yet grace has made a difference between those who love God, and those who do not; and as the Lord Jesus Christ has been to precious to them, in a time state, as an evidence they are precious to him, he has graciously designed death to be only their removal from sin and sorrow, to heaven, happiness, and God. Death is therefore a gift, freely bestowed on the Lord’s people, and in general a welcome friend, whose mission is only to usher the elect, redeemed, regenerated soul into glory; and though many such have been all their life-time in bondage, through the fear of death, yet, that same Almighty power that made them willing to be saved in God’s own way, makes them willing to leave all behind, and to enter into a world of spirits, to be for ever with the Lord; and not only willing, but sometimes longing, to be gone to that rest the Lord has provided for his covenant people. The faith that God has given them is sometimes indulged with sweet views of their inheritance, and they cast many a wishful eye to that land of delights.
Thus faith doth take a pleasing view,
Hope waits, love sits and sings;
Desire, she flutters to be gone,
But patience clips her wings.
What a chequered scene is the present state of God’s dear people, of adversity and prosperity, risings and fallings, darkness and light, losses and gains, crosses and mercies, bondage and liberty, sorrow and joy, life and death.
No sooner had the good hand of God provided us a chapel, and every thing seemed to prosper, but a sad calamity befel me, the worst I ever had, and the most distressing to my feelings—the death of a kind, loving, affectionate, and tender wife. In the sixth Letter of this little work I have given an account of our acquaintance and marriage; it was her mercy she had been taught of God before this period. Like most others, while young, she was cheerful and loved the world, and the things of it, and in the enmity of heart she despised the things of God, even to persecution; but she was the child, doubtless, of many prayers, compelled by an afflicted mother to read the Scriptures to her, which was no small burthen to her more gay and cheerful mind; she came to a very important portion of God’s Word, (Jer. iii.) a thought struck her that she would read that chapter again, when she was alone. She seized the opportunity, and when she came to the 4th verse, the passage was applied with peculiar power to her soul—“Wilt thou not, from this time, cry unto me, My Father, thou art the guide of my youth.” Conviction of her lost state came on, and she soon went to work at the law, attended legal preaching, and strove, in vain, to recommend herself to God, by the work of her hands, her watchings, vows, and resolutions, till the Lord led her under the ministry of more evangelical men, especially the ministry of our mutual favorite preacher, Mr. L. then supplying at Tottenham and Tabernacle: the Lord, having begun his good work, brought her soul into the sweet liberty of the gospel, and in the love and fear of God, she walked many years, living upon his grace, and depending upon his providence. Her faith and hope, though often tried and assaulted, were genuine, and her love to truth was firm; she was a woman of the finest feeling, and quick discernment of characters, many of whom she frequently cautioned me against, and many a sorrow I should have escaped, had I (as most men should) have listened to a wife. We had experienced many changes, and lived very comfortably together about eight years, when, alas! a sore trouble befel her, above which she never soared. A short time after her delivery of her fourth child, she being very weak and low, some incautious person suddenly surprized her with some alarming intelligence, which was found the next day to be false: this chilled her blood; medical aid was afforded, and she gained a little strength, but she felt the direful effects of it till her death, which was not till seven years afterwards. During this period she had but one child more, who grew up to his twelfth year, and then died in the Lord, a little account of which has since, been published in his funeral sermon, entitled “The Glory of Grace.” Increasing weakness, attended with fits, and her mode of living, reduced her system; she was confined to her bed but a short time, the last fortnight she was very composed; sometimes feared the hour of her departure, but the nearer she drew to death the less she feared. I took an affectionate leave of her the night previous to her death: her speech was gone twelve hours before her departure; I, however, endeavored to preach that morning on, “They that trust in the Lord shall be as the mount Zion, which cannot be moved.” This was expressive of her state, experience, and security. As that Lord’s-day closed, so she closed her eyes in death, sleeping in Jesus. I had many sweet portions of scripture, suited, indeed, to her case, brought with power to my soul; and having known her experience with the testimony of God’s truth, I am happy in the full persuasion of her eternal felicity. I preached on the following subject the Sunday after—“Ought not this woman, being a daughter of Abraham, whom satan has bound these eighteen years, to be loosed on the Sabbath-day?” Her warfare is accomplished. “What shall separate us from the love of Christ; shall things present?” I had many times advanced the doctrine of the final perseverance of believers; but it was truly precious then. As Mr. Huntington sings—
“The world may oppose, and fiends may engage,
And dangers and threat’nings dismay;
But still they pursue, in defiance of rage,
For the righteous shall hold on his way.”
Farewell.—Yours, truly, J. C.