QUACK DOCTORS.
Many years ago a sharp-witted scamp appeared in one of the European countries, and offered for sale a pill, which he declared to be a sure protection against earthquakes. Absurd as was the assertion, he sold large quantities of his nostrum, and grew rich on the proceeds. The credulity which enriched this man, is still a marked characteristic of the human race, and often strikingly exhibits itself in this country. The quack doctors, or medical impostors, to whom we shall devote this chapter, live upon it and do all in their power to encourage it.
There are quite a number of such men in New York, and they offer to cure all manner of diseases. Some offer their wares for a small sum, others charge enormous prices. Frequently one of these men will personate half a dozen different characters. The newspapers are full of their advertisements, some of which are really unfit for the columns of a respectable journal. Besides these, they send thousands of circulars, through the mails, to persons in various parts of the country, setting forth the horrors of certain diseases, and offering to cure them for a fixed sum. The circular contains an elaborate description of the symptoms or premonitory signs of these diseases. A very large number of persons, reading these descriptions, really come to the conclusion that they are affected in the manner stated by the quack. So great is the power of the imagination in these cases, that sound healthy men are, sometimes, absolutely led to fancy themselves in need of medical attention. A short conversation with their regular physicians, would soon undeceive them, but they foolishly send their money to the author of the circular in question, and request a quantity of his medicine for the purpose of trying it. The nostrum is received in due time, and is accompanied by a second circular, in which the patient is coolly informed that he must not expect to be cured by one bottle, box, or package, as the case may be, but that five or six, or sometimes a dozen will be necessary to complete the cure, especially if the case is as desperate and stubborn as the letter applying for the medicine seems to indicate. Many are foolish enough to take the whole half dozen bottles or packages, and in the end are no better in health than they were at first. Indeed they are fortunate if they are not seriously injured by the doses they have taken. They are disheartened in nine cases out of ten, and are, at length, really in need of good medical advice. They have paid the quack more money than a good practitioner would demand for his services, and have only been injured by their folly.
It may be safely said that no honest and competent physician will undertake to treat cases by letter. No one worthy of patronage will guarantee a cure in any case, for an educated practitioner understands that cases are many and frequent where the best human skill may be exerted in vain. Further than this, a physician of merit will not advertise himself in the newspapers, except to announce the location of his office or residence. Such physicians are jealous of their personal and professional reputations, and are proud of their calling, which is justly esteemed one of the noblest on earth. They are men of humanity and learning, and they take, perhaps, more pleasure in relieving suffering than in making money. If a patient cannot pay for their services, they give them free in the name of the Great Healer of all ills. They have no such things as private remedies. They use their knowledge for the good of mankind, and are prompt to make known their discoveries, so that all the world may enjoy the benefit, they themselves being rewarded with the fame of their inventions.
Not so with the quacks. A few have some medical knowledge, and are even graduates of regular colleges, but the majority have neither medical knowledge nor skill. They know their remedies are worthless, and they offer them only to make money. They know in many cases that their nostrums will inflict positive injury upon their victims; but they are careless of the harm they do. They live upon human misery.
We may safely assure the reader that not one single physician, so called, who conducts his business by means of advertisements or circulars, is really competent to treat the cases he professes to cure, and that no one knows this better than himself. Do not answer any advertisement you may see in the newspapers. They are worthless. Above all do not take the medicines sent you by the advertisers. Some of them are poisonous substances. If you doubt this assertion, take the compound to any druggist of your acquaintance, and ask him to analyze it, and tell you what it is worth as a healing agent. If you need medical advice, go to some physician that you know and have confidence in. Don't put yourself in the hands of a man you know nothing of, who would just as soon poison you as heal you, and who pursues his calling, in most cases, in violation of the laws of the land. Let quack doctors, or, in other words, advertising doctors, alone_.