No. XVII. SELF-CONTROL
Self-control is the power a man exercises over himself—the power to check his desires and passions; the power to deny himself present pleasures for the sake of a great purpose; the power to concentrate his energies on a single object in life.
Self-control is the basis of all Character, and the root of all the virtues. Without it, man is like a ship that has lost its rudder, and tosses helpless upon the waves. Self-control is one of the hardest things to learn, though no one can succeed in life without it. We say of the poor drunkard: "He could never say no!" The young man who can say no to his friends, when his Conscience tells him he should, has learned one of the hardest lessons of his life, and is in no danger of many of the worst pitfalls of early manhood. Tennyson says:
"Self-reverence, self-knowledge, self-control,
These three alone lead life to sovereign power."
The wise man said: "He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city."
A boy at school finds the greatest difficulty in paying attention. His mind keeps wandering away from his work. He makes good resolutions, but finds that, in spite of them, he cannot fix his attention. After a time, he despairs of himself, and gives up his chance, and perhaps bitterly disappoints his parents. The trouble was lack of Self-control. He had never learned how to master himself. He who can master himself can master almost any difficulty. He must learn what Concentration means. It is a habit, and can only be acquired little by little, by earnest effort, and a strict watch upon self. A good plan is to keep a watch open, and see how long the mind can be kept at work without suffering any interruption.
If we learn to control self in one way, it becomes easier to do so in others. If a boy is given to flying into a rage, and practises checking himself, until the habit is controlled, it will not be nearly so hard to control himself in other ways. One of the hardest things to conquer is the habit of exaggeration; it is so easy to overstate a thing, so hard to keep to the exact truth. The boy who conquers a habit like that is on the road to thorough Self-control.
Control of the appetite is, perhaps, the most difficult form of Self-control for boys to practise. He who gives way to his appetite yields the reins to a reckless driver. There is no vice more disgusting or more dangerous than gluttony. It is the vestibule to all the other vices. It is quite as important a duty to control one's stomach as to check one's tongue. The best things are apt to come to him who has learned to do without; though Self-control for its own sake is the herald of happiness. In the life of General Gordon, we are told that he once offered a native of the Soudan a drink of water. The man declined the water, saying that he had had a drink the day before. A drink every other day was enough for him; he had learned Self-control.
History is full of examples of the failure of men and nations through the loss of Self-control. The Greek nation was destroyed because the people gave themselves up to idleness and the gratification of their desires. So were the Romans, who were conquered by the savage Goths, who possessed the virtue of Self-restraint. No man ever yet became great who did not practise the great virtue of Self-denial.
St. Paul said: "I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection."