ONE RESULT OF THE MODERN METHODS OF THE UP-TO-DATE CHURCH

John, I just know there’s somebody trying to get in our front door. Now, do be careful when you open the door, John.
John, John, don’t open that door! Gee! I didn’t know w’ere te toor-bell wass at.
Oh, John, I just know something dreadful has happened to father! Gee! if dere hain’t no answer, I guess I’ll mosey back. Gee! dis is a peach of a night.