Subjects for Additional Lessons.
Use of fork and spoon, with practical illustrations.
Impoliteness of rapid eating.
[Chapter XII.]
LESSON ON MANNERS.
FOR ADVANCED PUPILS.
LESSON 1.
Purpose.—To suggest the underlying principles of good manners.
Method.—Item to be read with or without comment, or questions to be asked.
The Lesson.
Some one says “True politeness consists in making every one happy about you.” It is true that forgetfulness of self and thoughtfulness of the comfort and happiness of others makes one’s behavior very acceptable to others. A kind heart is undoubtedly the foundation of good manners; but if this be so, there are other qualities of equal importance that form a superstructure on which good manners rest. We use the term gentleman and lady with reference to outward appearance, but they also imply that a person is honest and true and refined. Who would think of calling one a gentleman if his word could not be trusted? Charles I. said to the Commoners, “You have not only the word of a king but of a gentleman.” Could a lady be guilty of indelicate language? Would a real gentleman or lady ridicule the unfortunate? True courtesy implies much more than an outside show. Even what seems a mere form is usually founded in kindness and common sense. It is necessary that we become familiar with these forms. We do not like to be called odd or peculiar. We do not like to be considered ignorant of what good and wise people have decided it proper and right to do. We wish rather to copy the manners of the best people that we may gain their esteem and be classed with them. If we learn and practise good manners while we are young, when older we shall practise them unconsciously, as they will have become a habit.
(Questions to be used if preferred.)
What leads people to be polite?
How has some one defined true politeness?
What did Charles I. imply by his statement?
Why is it necessary to become familiar with the formalities of good manners? Give illustration of some practice of polite society that might be termed a formality. Enumerate the underlying principles of good manners.
[Chapter XIII.]
MANNERS IN SCHOOL.
LESSON 2.
Purpose.—To show the necessity of good manners in school.
Method.—Item to be read with or without comment, or questions to be asked.
The Lesson.
Young people sometimes seem to think good manners are to be put on as fine clothes are, not for every-day wear, but for company only. Those who put this theory into practice will find that good manners fit them in company no better than garments cut for some one else. If manners really spring from a kind heart, they will be practised everywhere. Good manners in school continually practised will soon become a habit. Courteous pupils rarely need reprimand or reproof. They treat their teacher as they would a friend, and in this way help greatly in making the school pleasant and profitable. Such pupils remember their school-days with pleasure.
Questions. What is the appearance of one who is only occasionally polite?
What is the real source of good manners?
Where should they be practised?
Are good manners as important in a school-room as in a parlor?
What is the effect of good manners in the school?
LESSON 3.
Purpose.—To show that regularity and punctuality of attendance at school are signs of good manners.
Method.—Item to be read with or without comment, or questions to be asked.
The Lesson.
In all well-regulated schools, teachers and school-officers place much stress upon regularity of attendance; consequently an avoidable or inexcusable absence shows disrespect to school authority.
When a pupil enters a school-room late it interrupts and disturbs all who are present. An avoidable interruption or disturbance is, of course, impolite. Any disregard of the rules of school shows a lack of respect for teachers and school-officers. Lack of respect and true politeness never go together.
Questions. What is the rule in this school relative to regularity of attendance?
What in reference to punctuality?
What absences or tardinesses show disrespect to school authority?
How does disrespectful conduct affect the manners?
To what kind of manners do regularity and punctuality tend?
LESSON 4.
Purpose.—To show that cleanliness is one sign of good manners in school.
Method.—Item to be read with or without comment, or questions to be asked.
The Lesson.
Cleanliness of person and tidiness of dress are unmistakable signs of good breeding. The minutest detail of the toilet should be attended to. Frequent bathing and proper attentions to the hair, the teeth, the nails, are of no slight importance. The clothing also should be clean. Pupils who fail to observe these directions not only show lack of respect for themselves, but for their teachers and school-mates. Disrespect is impoliteness.
Questions. What opinion do you form of a person who is untidy?
What details of the toilet may be neglected?
How does slovenliness of dress affect the reputation of one who indulges in it?
Of what does untidiness show a lack?
Is disrespectful treatment of another ever polite?
LESSON 5.
Purpose.—To show that care for school belongings is a sign of good breeding.
Method.—Item to be read and questions asked.
The Lesson.
Proper respect for the school will deter pupils from throwing on school-grounds, or on the steps of buildings, or on the floors of the corridors or of the school-room, whatever is unsightly.
The same may be said with reference to chalk or pencil marks, or anything that defaces school-buildings or school furniture.
In stormy weather pupils should not enter a school-building without first cleaning the shoes or removing rubbers. They should enter quietly and never be noisy or boisterous inside of a school-room. Running or jumping, or stepping on the seats or desks, is not allowable.
Pupils should take care of what they use but do not own. Books or any materials furnished by the school should be carefully and economically used. Moreover, if pupils are well-bred their own books will be devoid of finger-marks or cuts, or of marks and soil of any kind except that which comes from constant use.
Questions. If pupils have the proper feeling for their school, what care will they take of the grounds? Of the buildings? Of the furniture?
How show good breeding in economy?
What rule holds good in returning borrowed articles?
How should school-books be used even by their owners?
Show how all these things are indicative of good breeding.
Show how they are one step towards good citizenship.
LESSON 6.
Purpose.—To show how pupils should conduct themselves towards their teachers.
Method.—Item to be read with or without comment.
The Lesson.
1. When pupils are placed under the charge of a teacher it is supposed the teacher knows what is for their best good; consequently a teacher’s directions should be respected and obeyed. In matters pertaining to conduct, pupils should yield their opinions to that of a wise and faithful teacher, and should do it with quick and cheerful obedience. Sulking, contradiction, or delay in obeying are not only wrong, but inexcusably rude.
2. Oftentimes pupils seem to regard it as no impoliteness to interrupt a teacher either by inattention, disorder, or questions, when a lesson is in progress. There are times when certain questions relative to lessons are in order, but irrelevant questions, or unnecessary requests, or hand-raising or shaking before a teacher has finished speaking, are just as impolite in a school-room as elsewhere. There are, of course, certain usages peculiar to a school-room which would not be considered in order elsewhere, because unnecessary; but, generally speaking, good manners in a school-room and in a parlor are the same.
3. Pupils should be kind and thoughtful in assisting teachers whenever it is possible, by handing anything needed, or by waiting upon them in any way. Boys, especially, should be quick to offer help in erasing blackboards, in lifting heavy articles, or in picking up anything accidentally dropped. All pupils should help to put things in their proper places and to keep the school-room in order. This is kindness and politeness.
4. Boys should always take off their hats before entering a school-room, and should not put them on at dismissal, until they reach the outside door. If a teacher should stand at that door, hats should not be put on until the teacher is passed. When boys meet a teacher in the street they should always raise their hats, whether the teacher be a gentleman or a lady. Both in school and out, when pupils speak to or of their teacher, they should speak the real name, and not use the indefinite title, “Teacher.”