Progress and Achievements of the Colored People / Containing the Story of the Wonderful Advancement of the Colored Americans—the Most Marvelous in the History of Nations—Their Past Accomplishments, Together With Their Present-day Opportunities and a Glimpse Into the Future for Further Developments—the Dawn of a Triumphant Era. A Handbook for Self-improvement Which Leads to Greater Success

by Kelly Miller; Joseph R. Gay

THE DUTIES OF HUSBAND AND WIFE TO EACH OTHER

The mother’s rights are real and comprehensive. They are something not to be disputed. Hers are the greatest in the family. These rights her children may not in early youth be able to fully realize, but these she must teach to them simply and must insist upon. She has rights, very clearly defined, to be accorded by her husband, and if he hesitates she is most unfortunate and he is most unworthy. Her dues from him are the greatest of all. They are the greatest in the world. If she has borne him children she has done for him the utmost that one human being can do for another. She has, literally, given him herself. Well has it been said that a man’s duty to a faithful wife can never end while life lasts. “When she consented to be his helpmate and to virtually transform every organ in her body that his lineage may not die out, that he may have children, healthy, happy and able, she has done more for him than he can ever repay in a lifetime of service. She has taken the chance gladly and risked her life for him.” Under what more tremendous obligation could she place him? She has established a right which covers all things.

These greatest rights—those of the mother from the husband—are so numerous, so all-comprehending, that they cannot be given in detail. They imply simply that he should look upon her as a part of himself and show it instinctively and as a matter of course. She has the right to claim from him that he should always be to her as he was before marriage, save that the relationship is closer and more familiar. What proportion of husbands remember this? How often does there come a time after marriage when the husband forgets that they are one? How often does he show unmistakably that he thinks his family is a drag upon him, that he is bearing a burden, that he deserves especial credit for bearing it and that what he pays out for family expenses he is “giving?” There would be short work were he to assume such an attitude toward his partner in a business venture, yet he is, literally, in partnership with his wife in the greatest business this life affords and that she put in by far the greater part of the capital in the beginning!