CICERO'S LETTERS TO ATTICUS BOOK X
I
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Laterium, April 3, B.C. 49
Iliad XXII, 304
On the third of April coming to my brother's house at Laterium, I got your letter with some little relief, a thing which had not happened to me since this disaster began. For I attach very great weight to your approval of my firmness of mind and my action. As for your writing that it meets with the approval of my friend Sextus, I am as glad as if I fancied myself to have won the approval of his father, on whose judgement I always set the very highest value. I often call to mind how it was he who said to me on that famous December the 5th, when I asked him what we were to do next: "Let me not die a coward and shameful death, but greatly daring live in fame for aye." So his influence lives for me, and his son, who is very like him, has the same weight as he. Please give him my best compliments.
Your plan, it is true, you postpone for a very short time,—for I fancy by now that that venal peace-maker must have wound up his speech, and something must have been done in the session of Senators, for I don't consider it a Senate,—still you keep mine in suspense, but the less so because I have no doubt as to what you think we should do. For when you write that Flavius is offered a legion and Sicily, and that the matter is now in hand, just think what
partim parari iam et cogitari, partim ex tempore futura censes? Ego vero Solonis, popularis tui, ut puto, etiam mei, legem neglegam, qui capite sanxit, si qui in seditione non alterius utrius partis fuisset, et, nisi si tu aliter censes, et hinc abero et illim. Sed alterum mihi est certius, nec praeripiam tamen. Exspectabo tuum consilium et eas litteras, nisi alias iam dedisti, quas scripsi ut Cephalioni dares.
Quod scribis, non quo aliunde audieris, sed te ipsum putare me attractum iri, si de pace agatur, mihi omnino non venit in mentem, quae possit actio esse de pace, cum illi certissimum sit, si possit, exspoliare exercitu et provincia Pompeium; nisi forte iste nummarius ei potest persuadere, ut, dum oratores eant, redeant, quiescat. Nihil video, quod sperem aut quod iam putem fieri posse. Sed tamen hominis hoc ipsum probi est et magnum τι[119] τῶν πολιτικωτάτων σκεμμάτων, veniendumne sit in consilium tyranni, si is aliqua de re bona deliberaturus sit. Quare, si quid eius modi evenerit, ut arcessamur (quod equidem non credo.[120] Quid enim essem de pace dicturus, dixi; ipse valde repudiavit), sed tamen, si quid acciderit, quid censeas mihi faciendum, utique scribito. Nihil enini mihi adhuc accidit, quod maioris consilii esset.
[119] et magnum τι Wesenberg; magnum sit MSS.
[120] credo Boot: curo MSS.
Trebati, boni viri et civis, verbis te gaudeo delectatum, tuaque ista crebra ἐκφώνησις ὑπέρευ me sola adhuc delectavit. Litteras tuas vehementer
iniquities are being prepared and meditated, some now and some in the future? I shall certainly neglect the law of Solon, your countryman, and I imagine mine too soon, who provided the death penalty for anyone who should not take one side in a revolution, and, unless you advise otherwise, I shall keep apart both from Caesar and Pompey. The former course is quite certain: but I shall not forestall events. I shall await your advice and the letter which I asked you to give to Cephalio—unless you have now sent another.
You write, not on the authority of anyone, but as your own idea, that I shall be drawn into any negotiations there may be for peace. I cannot imagine that there can be such negotiations, since it is Caesar's positive determination to rob Pompey, if possible, of army and province, unless perhaps that hireling can induce him to keep quiet, pending the passage to and fro of intermediaries. I see nothing that I can hope for or even imagine is likely to happen. However this is the very question for an honest man to decide and one of the great questions of la haute politique, whether one may enter the council of a tyrant, if the subject of debate is good. Therefore, if anything should happen to cause me to be summoned—I don't in the least expect anything will, for I have said all I can say about peace, and Caesar was determined to repudiate it—still, if anything should happen, write and tell me what you think I should do in any case. For so far nothing has happened that demands greater deliberation.
I am glad you are pleased with the words of that loyal citizen Trebatius, and your frequent bravos have so far been my sole pleasure. Your letter I
exspecto; quas quidem credo iam datas esse. Tu cum Sexto servasti gravitatem eandem, quam mihi praecipis. Celer tuus disertus magis est quam sapiens. De iuvenibus quae ex Tullia audisti, vera sunt. Mucianum[121] istud, quod scribis, non mihi videtur tam re esse triste quam verbo. Haec est ἄλη, in qua nunc sumus, mortis instar. Aut enim mihi libere inter malos πολιτευτέον fuit aut vel periculose cum bonis. Aut oportet temeritatem bonorum sequamur aut audaciam improborum insectemur. Utrumque periculosum est, at hoc, quod agimus, turpe nec tamen tutum.
[121] Mucianum Reid: Maconi MSS.
Istum, qui filium Brundisium de pace misit (de pace idem sentio quod tu, simulationem esse apertam, parari autem acerrime bellum), me legatum iri non arbitror, cuius adhuc, ut optavi, mentio facta nulla sit. Eo minus habeo necesse scribere aut etiam cogitare, quid sim facturus, si acciderit, ut legarer.
II
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Arcano Quinti fr. postr. Non. Apr. a. 705
Ego cum accepissem tuas litteras Nonis Aprilibus, quas Cephalio attulerat, essemque Menturnis postridie mansurus, ut inde protinus, sustinui me in Arcano fratris, ut, dum aliquid certius adferretur, occultiore in loco essemus, agerenturque nihilo minus, quae sine nobis agi possunt.
await eagerly. I expect it has been dispatched now. With Sextus you have preserved the same dignity that you prescribe for me. Your friend Celer has more wit than wisdom. What you heard from Tullia about the boys is true. Mucius' ending,[122] which you mention, does not seem to me so sad as it sounds. It is this distraction in which we now find ourselves that is like death. For I have the alternative, either to take part in politics with a free hand among the disloyal, or to side with the loyal at all costs. I ought either to follow the loyalists in their rashness or attack the other party in its daring. Either course spells danger: but my present action brings shame without safety.
[122] Cf. ix, 12.
The man who sent his son to Brundisium to negotiate peace (my views on peace are yours, that it is patent pretence, but that war is being prosecuted with the utmost activity) that man I think and not I will be chosen as commissioner. So far to my relief I have heard nothing. So I fancy it less necessary to write or consider my possible course of action, if I should happen to be chosen.
II
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Arcanum, April 6, B.C. 49
I received your letter brought by Cephalio on the 5th of April. The next day I intended to stop at Menturnae, and to return thence at once. I halted at my brother's place at Arcanum in order that I might be in a more retired place till I get certain news and that such preparations for the journey, as did not need my presence, might be made.
Λαλαγεῦσα iam adest, et animus ardet, neque est quicquam, quo et qua. Sed haec nostra erit cura et peritorum. Tu tamen, quod poteris, ut adhuc fecisti, nos consiliis iuvabis. Res sunt inexplicabiles. Fortunae sunt committenda omnia. Sine spe conamur ulla. Melius si quid acciderit, mirabimur. Dionysium nollem ad me profectum; de quo ad me Tullia mea scripsit. Sed et tempus alienum est, et homini non amico nostra incommoda, tanta praesertim, spectaculo esse nollem; cui te meo nomine inimicum esse nolo.
III
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Arcano VII Id. Apr. a. 705
Cum, quod scriberem, plane nihil haberem, haec autem reliqua essent, quae scire cuperem, profectusne esset, quo in statu urbem reliquisset, in ipsa Italia quem cuique regioni aut negotio praefecisset, ecqui essent ad Pompeium et ad consules ex senatus consulto de pace legati, cum igitur haec scire cuperem, dedita opera has ad te litteras misi. Feceris igitur commode mihique gratum, si me de his rebus, et si quid erit aliud, quod scire opus sit, feceris certiorem. Ego in Arcano opperior, dum ista cognosco.
The "bird that twitters of flight"[123] is here and I am afire with eagerness, though I have no idea of destination or route. But these will be considered by me and by those who know. You however must assist me with your advice, so far as possible, as you have before. The tangle cannot be unravelled. Everything must be entrusted to fortune. We are simply struggling without hope. If anything better happens, I shall be surprised. I would rather Dionysius did not come to me: Tullia has written to me about him. The time is unsuitable, and I should prefer that discomforts as great as mine should not be seen by a man who is not my friend. But I do not want you to be his enemy on my account.
[123] Cf. ix, 18.
III
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Arcanum, April 7, B.C. 49
Though I have nothing at all to write about, yet these points remain, which I want to know. Has Caesar started? In what condition has he left Rome? In Italy itself whom has he placed in charge of each region or department? Who were sent to Pompey and the consuls as peace commissioners according to the decree of the Senate? To make these inquiries I have taken the trouble to send this letter. So you will do well and please me, if you inform me on these points and of anything else which I ought to know. I stay in Arcanum till I get information.
IIIa
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Arcano VII Id. Apr. a. 705
A. d. VII Idus alteram tibi eodem die hanc epistulam dictavi et pridie dederam mea manu longiorem. Visum te aiunt in regia, nec reprehendo, quippe cum ipse istam reprehensionem non fugerim. Sed exspecto tuas litteras neque iam sane video, quid exspectem, sed tamen, etiamsi nihil erit, id ipsum ad me velim scribas.
Caesar mihi ignoscit per litteras, quod non venerim, seseque in optimam partem id accipere dicit. Facile patior, quod scribit, secum Titinium et Servium questos esse, quia non idem sibi quod mihi remisisset. Homines ridiculos! qui, cum filios misissent ad Cn. Pompeium circumsedendum, ipsi in senatum venire dubitarint. Sed tamen exemplum misi ad te Caesaris litterarum.
IV
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano XVII K. Mai. a. 705
Multas a te accepi epistulas eodem die omnes diligenter scriptas, eam vero, quae voluminis instar erat, saepe legendam, sicuti facio. In qua non frustra laborem suscepisti, mihi quidem pergratum fecisti. Quare, ut id, quoad licebit, id est quoad scies, ubi simus, quam saepissime facias, te vehementer rogo. Ac deplorandi quidem, quod cotidie facimus, sit iam nobis aut finis omnino, si potest, aut moderatio quaedam,
IIIa
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Arcanum, April 7, B.C. 49
On the 7th of April I dictate this letter, the second on the same day, and yesterday I dispatched a longer one in my own handwriting. It is said you have been seen in the Regia,[124] and I don't blame you, since I laid myself open to the same blame. But I await a letter from you. I don't see what news I can expect; but still, even if there is none, I wish you would just tell me that.
[124] The official residence of Caesar as Pontifex maximus.
Caesar has written to excuse me for not coming to Rome, and says that he takes it in good part. I am not concerned at his saying that Titinius and Servius have complained to him for not allowing them the same privilege as he did to me. What fools they are! They send their sons to besiege Pompey, and themselves hesitate to enter the House. However, I send you a copy of Caesar's letter.
IV
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, April 14, B.C. 49
I have received a lot of letters from you on the same day, all of them written with care and one, which is as big as a book, worth reading several times, as I am doing. Your labour has not been in vain: you have gratified me very much. And so I beseech you continue to write as often as you can, so long as it is possible, that is, so long as you know where I am. And as for our daily lamentations let us make an end of them once for all, if we can, or at
quod profecto potest. Non enim iam, quam dignitatem, quos honores, quem vitae statum amiserim, cogito, sed quid consecutus sim, quid praestiterim, qua in laude vixerim, his denique in malis quid intersit inter me et istos, quos propter omnia amisimus. Hi sunt, qui, nisi me civitate expulissent, obtinere se non putaverant posse licentiam cupiditatum suarum. Quorum societatis et sceleratae consensionis fides quo eruperit, vides.
Alter ardet furore et scelere, nec remittit aliquid, sed in dies ingravescit; modo Italia expulit, nunc alia ex parte persequi, ex alia provincia exspoliare conatur, nec iam recusat, sed quodam modo postulat, ut, quem ad modum est, sic etiam appelletur tyrannus. Alter, is qui nos sibi quondam ad pedes stratos ne sublevabat quidem, qui se nihil contra huius voluntatem facere posse, elapsus e soceri manibus ac ferro bellum terra et mari comparat, non iniustum ille quidem, sed cum pium tum etiam necessarium, suis tamen civibus exitiabile, nisi vicerit, calamitosum, etiamsi vicerit. Horum ego summorum imperatoram non modo res gestas non antepono meis, sed ne fortunam quidem ipsam; qua illi florentissima, nos duriore conflictati videmur. Quis enim potest aut deserta per se patria aut oppressa beatus esse? Et, si, ut nos a te admonemur, recte in illis libris diximus nihil esse bonum, nisi quod honestum, nihil malum, nisi
any rate moderate them, which we certainly can. For I have given up thinking of the dignity, the honours and the position I have lost: I think of what I have attained, what I have done, the glory of my career, in short what a difference there is even in our present straits between me and those through whom I have lost all. They are the people who thought they could not attain their extravagant desires without expelling me from the State: and you see now what has come of their coalition in a criminal conspiracy.
The one burns with a madman's lust for crime, which does not cool one whit, but rather increases day by day. He has just driven Pompey from Italy, now on one side of the world he is pursuing him, on the other he is trying to rob him of his province: and he no longer refuses, nay, he practically demands, to be called a tyrant, as he is. The other, who once would not even give me a helping hand, when I threw myself at his feet, declaring he could do nothing against Caesar's will, now, having slipped from the grasp of his father-in-law's mailed hand, is preparing war by land and sea. The war is not unjust on his part, nay, it is even righteous and necessary; but, unless he conquers, it will be fatal to his fellow-countrymen; and, even if he does conquer, it will be disastrous. These are our great men; but I do not hold their achievements one whit superior to mine, nor even their fortune, though they may seem to have basked in fortune's smiles while I have met her frowns. For who can be happy, when he has caused his country to be deserted or enslaved? And if, as you admonish me, I was right in saying in those books of mine that nothing is good, save
quod turpe sit, certe uterque istorum est miserrimus, quorum utrique semper patriae salus et dignitas posterior sua dominatione et domesticis commodis fuit. Praeclara igitur conscientia sustentor, cum cogito me de re publica aut meruisse optime, cum potuerim, aut certe numquam nisi pie cogitasse, eaque ipsa tempestate eversam esse rem publicam, quam ego XIIII annis ante prospexerim. Hac igitur conscientia comite proficiscar magno equidem cum dolore nec tam id propter me aut propter fratrem meum, quorum est iam acta aetas, quam propter pueros, quibus interdum videmur praestare etiam rem publicam debuisse. Quorum quidem alter non tam quia filius quam,[125] quia maiore pietate est, me mirabiliter excruciat, alter (o rem miseram! nihil enim mihi accidit in omni vita acerbius) indulgentia videlicet nostra depravatus eo progressus est, quo non audeo dicere. Et exspecto tuas litteras; scripsisti enim te scripturum esse plura, cum ipsum vidisses. Omne meum obsequium in illum fuit cum multa severitate, neque unum eius nec parvum, sed multa magna delicta compressi. Patris autem lenitas amanda potius ab illo quam tam crudeliter neglegenda. Nam litteras eius ad Caesarem missas ita graviter tulimus, ut te quidem celaremus, sed ipsius videremur vitam insuavem reddidisse. Hoc vero eius iter simulatioque pietatis qualis fuerit, non audeo dicere; tantum scio, post Hirtium conventum
[125] quia filius quam added by Malaspina.
what is honourable, and nothing bad, save what is dishonourable, then certainly both of them are most miserable, since both of them have thought less of their country's safety and dignity than of their own high place and private interests. My conscience then is clear and helps to support me, when I think that I have always rendered my country good service, when I could, and assuredly have never harboured any but loyal thoughts, and that the State has been wrecked by the very storm which I foresaw fourteen years ago. With a clear conscience then I shall depart, though the parting will cost me a bitter pang: nor shall I go so much for my own sake or for my brother's—our day is done—as for our children, to whom I think at times we ought to have secured at least a free country. For one of them I feel the most poignant grief—not so much because he is my son, as because he is exceedingly dutiful—while the other unfortunately has turned out the bitterest disappointment of my life. He has been spoiled, I suppose, by our indulgence, and has gone to lengths that I dare not name. I am waiting for your letter too; for you promised to write more fully when you had seen him himself. All my humouring of him has been accompanied by considerable strictness: and I have had to put my foot down not over one fault of his or a small one, but over many grave faults. But his father's kindness should surely have been repaid by affection rather than by such cruel disregard. For we were more annoyed at his sending letters to Caesar than we let you see, but I think we made his life a burden to him. I dare not describe this recent journey of his and his hypocritical pretence of filial duty: I only know that, after he met Hirtius,
arcessitum a Caesare, cum eo de meo animo a suis rationibus alienissimo et consilio relinquendi Italiam; et haec ipsa timide. Sed nulla nostra culpa est, natura metuenda est. Haec Curionem, haec Hortensi filium, non patrum culpa corrupit.
Iacet in maerore meus frater neque tam de sua vita quam de mea metuit. Huic tu huic tu malo adfer consolationes, si ullas potes; maxime quidem illam velim, ea, quae ad nos delata sint, aut falsa esse aut minora. Quae si vera sint, quid futurum sit in hac vita et fuga, nescio. Nam, si haberemus rem publicam, consilium mihi non deesset nec ad severitatem nec ad indulgentiam. Nunc haec sive iracundia sive dolore sive metu permotus gravius scripsi, quam aut tuus in illum amor aut meus postulabat, si vera sunt, ignosces, si falsa, me libente eripies mihi hunc errorem. Quoquo modo vero se res habebit, nihil adsignabis nec patruo nec patri.
Cum haec scripsissem, a Curione mihi nuntiatum est eum ad me venire. Venerat enim is in Cumanum vesperi pridie, id est Idibus. Si quid igitur eius modi sermo eius attulerit, quod ad te scribendum sit, id his litteris adiungam.
Praeteriit villam meam Curio iussitque mihi nuntiari mox se venturum cucurritque Puteolos, ut ibi contionaretur. Contionatus est, rediit, fuit ad me sane diu. O rem foedam! Nosti hominem; nihil occultavit, in primis nihil esse certius, quam ut
he was summoned to Caesar's presence, and discussed the difference between my views and his own and my plan of leaving Italy. Even that I write with hesitation. But it is no fault of mine: it is his disposition which must cause us anxiety. That is what corrupted Curio and Hortensius' son, not their fathers' fault.
My brother is prostrate with grief, though he does not fear for his own life so much as for mine. It is to him, to him more than me, I want you to offer consolation, if you can. The best consolation would be that what we have heard was false or exaggerated. If it was true, I fail to see what will come of this runaway existence. For if the constitution were still intact, I should know what to do both in the way of severity and in the way of kindness. Now, under the sway of some passion, be it wrath or sorrow or fear, I have written more bitterly than either your affection for him or mine warrants. If what I have said is true, you will pardon me: if it is false, I shall be only too glad to have the error removed. However it may be, you must not blame his uncle or his father.
When I had got so far, I received a message from Curio that he was coming to see me. He came to his place here yesterday evening, that is on the 13th. If any point worth mentioning to you occurs in our conversation, I will add it to this letter.
Curio passed by my house, and sent a message saying he was coming very soon. Then he hurried off to make a speech at Puteoli. He made his speech, returned and stayed a very long time. How disgusting! You know the sort of man he is: he hid nothing. In the first place he is quite sure that all
omnes, qui lege Pompeia condemnati essent, restituerentur. Itaque se in Sicilia eorum opera usurum. De Hispaniis non dubitabat, quin Caesaris essent. Inde ipsum cum exercitu, ubicumque Pompeius esset. Eius interitum finem belli[126] fore. Propius factum esse nihil, nisi[127] plane iracundia elatum voluisse Caesarem occidi Metellum tribunum pl. Quod si esset factum, caedem magnam futuram fuisse. Permultos hortatores esse caedis, ipsum autem non voluntate aut natura non esse crudelem, sed quod popularem putaret esse clementiam. Quodsi populi stadium amisisset, crudelem fore. Eumque perturbatum, quod intellegeret se apud ipsam plebem offendisse de aerario. Itaque, ei cum certissimum fuisset, antequam proficisceretur, contionem habere, ausum non esse vehementerque animo perturbato profectum. Cum autem ex eo quaererem, quid videret, quem eventum, quam rem publicam, plane fatebatur nullam spem reliquam. Pompei classem timebat. Quae si exisset, se de Sicilia abiturum. "Quid isti," inquam, "sex tui fasces? si a senatu, cur laureati? si ab ipso, cur sex?" "Cupivi," inquit, "ex senatus consulto surrupto; nam aliter non poterat. At ille impendio nunc magis odit senatum. A me," inquit, "omnia proficiscentur,"
[126] belli Manutius; illi MSS.
[127] nisi Schmidt; ei MSS.
those condemned by Pompey's law are going to be recalled: and so he is going to make use of their services in Sicily. He had no doubt about Caesar getting the two Spains and said he would start from them with an army to wherever Pompey might be. Pompey's death would be the end of the war. Caesar had been carried away by anger into wishing to have the tribune Metellus killed and he had had a narrow shave. If it had happened, there would have been an enormous massacre. Many had spoken in favour of a massacre: and Caesar himself was not by nature and inclination averse to cruelty, but he thought that mild measures would win popularity. But, if he lost popular favour, he would be cruel. He had been put out when he found that he had offended the populace itself by seizing the treasury: and so, though he had fully made up his mind to harangue the people before leaving, he had not ventured to do so, and he had gone off in a very disturbed state of mind. But when I asked Curio what he looked forward to, what end, and what constitution, he confessed openly that there was no hope left. He was afraid of Pompey's fleet, and, if it put to sea, he should desert Sicily. I asked, what was the meaning of his six lictors, why their staves were laurelled, if the Senate gave them to him, and why there were six, if Caesar gave them. [128] He said, "I wanted to snatch a vote from the House for them (for it could not be done openly): but Caesar hates the Senate like poison, and declares that all such authority will
[128] Six lictors were the regular number for the propraetor of Sicily; but their staves would not be laurelled as Curio had not won a victory over a public enemy. If appointed a legatus to Caesar he might have had proconsular powers and twelve lictors.
"Cur autem sex?" "Quia XII nolui; nam licebat." Tum ego "Quam vellem," inquam, "petisse ab eo, quod audio Philippum impetrasse! Sed veritus sum, quia ille a me nihil impetrabat." "Libenter," inquit, "tibi concessisset. Verum puta te impetrasse; ego enim ad eum scribam, ut tu ipse voles, de ea re nos inter nos locutos. Quid autem illius interest, quoniam in senatum non venis, ubi sis? Quin nunc ipsum minime offendisses eius causam, si in Italia non fuisses." Ad quae ego me recessum et solitudinem quaerere, maxime quod lictores haberem. Laudavit consilium. "Quid ergo?" inquam; "nam mihi cursus in Graeciam per tuam provinciam est, quoniam ad mare superum milites sunt." "Quid mihi," inquit, "optatius?" Hoc loco multa perliberaliter. Ergo hoc quidem est profectum, ut non modo tuto, verum etiam palam navigaremus.
Reliqua in posterum diem distulit; ex quibus scribam ad to si quid erit epistula dignum. Sunt autem, quae praeterii, interregnumne esset exspectaturus, an, quo modo dixerit ille quidem ad se deferri consulatum, sed se nolle in proximum annum. Et alia sunt, quae exquiram. Iurabat ad summam, quod nullo negotio facere solet, amicissimum mihi Caesarem esse. "Dubito equidem," inquam. "Scripsit ad me Dolabella." "Dic, quid?" Adfirmabat eum scripsisse, quod me cuperet ad urbem venire, illum quidem gratias agere maximas et non modo probare, sed etiam gaudere. Quid quaeris? acquievi, Levata
proceed from him." "But why six?" "Because I didn't want twelve, though I could have had them." I said: "I wish I had asked for what I hear Philippus has got from him: but I was afraid to ask, as he got nothing from me." He replied: "He would willingly have given you permission. But take it that you did get it. I will write to him just as you wish, and say we have spoken about the matter. What does it matter to him where you are, as you do not attend the House? If you were not in Italy at this very moment, it would not damage his cause in the least." I responded that I was looking for a retired and solitary retreat, especially because I still had my lictors in attendance. He agreed with me. "How about this then," said I. "My way through to Greece lies through your province, as the Adriatic is guarded." "There is nothing I should like better," he said, and added many very handsome remarks. So something has come of it: I could sail not only in safety, but openly.
The rest he put off for the next day: I will write and tell you if there is anything worth mentioning. But there are some things I omitted to ask: whether Caesar was going to wait for an interregnum, or what he meant by saying that he had been offered the consulship but had refused it for the next year. And there are other points I must ask about. Finally he swore—though to be sure he makes no bones about swearing—that Caesar was very friendly to me. I expressed my doubt. He said he had heard from Dolabella. I asked what he said, and he declared he said Caesar had thanked him warmly for wanting me to go to Rome, and not only approved but showed pleasure. Of course I felt relieved.
est enim suspicio illa domestici mali et sermonis Hirtiani. Quam cupio illum dignum esse nobis, et quam ipse me invito, quae pro illo sint, ad suspicandum! Sed opus fuit Hirtio convento? Est profecto nescio quid, sed velim quam minimo. Et tamen eum nondum redisse miramur. Sed haec videbimus.
Tu Oppios Terentiae delegabis.[129] Iam enim urbis unum periculum est. Me tamen consilio iuva, pedibusne Regium an hinc statim in navem, et cetera, quoniam commoror. Ego ad te statim habebo, quod scribam, simul ut videro Curionem. De Tirone cura, quaeso, quod facis, ut sciam, quid is agat.
[129] delegabis Wesenberg: dabis MSS.
V
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano XV K. Mai. a. 705
De tota mea cogitatione scripsi ad te antea satis, ut mihi visus sum, diligenter. De die nihil sane potest scribi certi praeter hoc, non ante lunam novam. Curionis sermo postridie eandem habuit fere summam, nisi quod apertius significavit se harum rerum exitum non videre.
Quod mihi mandas de Quinto regendo, Ἀρκαδίαν
The suspicion of domestic treachery and of the talk with Hirtius has been removed. How I hope young Quintus is worthy of his family, and how I keep urging myself to note the points in his favour! But need he have visited Hirtius? There is something in the tale, but I hope it may not prove of much consequence. Still I wonder he is not back yet. But we shall see about this.
Please introduce Terentia to the Oppii: for there is only one danger in Rome now.[130] As for me, give me the benefit of your advice as to whether I am to go to Regium on foot or to embark straight from here, and on all the other points too, as I am staying here. I shall have something to write as soon as I have seen Curio. Please keep me posted up in news about Tiro's condition, as you have done.
[130] The Oppii were moneylenders, and, if the reading unum is right, Cicero must mean that lack of obtaining ready money was the only danger in Rome.
V
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, April 16, B.C. 49
About the whole of my plans I have written to you before, as I think, exactly. Of the day I can say no more for certain than this, that it will not be before the new moon. Curio's conversation on the next day had practically the same gist, except that he showed still more frankly that he could not see an end to this state of things.
50,000 sesterces
30,000 sesterces
As for your commission about the control of Quintus, you are asking for the moon.[131] However I
[131] Cf. the answer of the Delphic oracle to a Spartan envoy in Herodotus I, 66, Ἀρκαδίαν μ'αἰτεῖς, μέγα μ'αἰτεῖς, οὖτοι δώσω. "Thou askest for Arcadia. 'Tis much thou askest for. I will not give it."
Tamen nihil praetermittam. Atque utinam tu ——, sed molestior non ero. Epistulam ad Vestorium statim detuli, ac valde requirere solebat. Commodius tecum Vettienus est locutus, quam ad me scripserat. Sed mirari satis hominis neglegentiam non queo. Cum enim mihi Philotimus dixisset se HS L emere de Canuleio deversorium illud posse, minoris etiam empturum, si Vettienum rogassem, rogavi, ut, si quid posset, ex ea summa detraheret. Promisit. Ad me nuper se HS XXX emisse; ut scriberem, cui vellem addici; diem pecuniae Idus Novembr. esse. Rescripsi ei stomachosius, cum ioco tamen familiari. Nunc, quoniam agit liberaliter, nihil accuso hominem, scripsique ad eum me a te certiorem esse factum. Tu, de tuo itinere quid et quando cogites, velim me certiorem facias. A. d. XV K. Maias.
VI
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano medio m. Apr. a. 705
Me adhuc nihil praeter tempestatem moratur. Astute nihil sum acturus. Fiat in Hispania quidlibet; et tamen ire certum est.[132] Meas cogitationes omnis explicavi tibi superioribus litteris. Quocirca hae sunt breves, etiam[133] quia festinabam eramque occupatior.
[132] ire certum est Wesenberg: recitet et MZb: reticeret Zl.
[133] etiam Malaspina: et tamen MSS.
De Quinto filio fit a me quidem sedulo; sed nosti
shall be guilty of no omission and would that you——. But I will not be too troublesome. The letter I forwarded at once to Vestorius; he kept asking why it was not sent. Vettienus has spoken with you in a tone more accommodating than his letter to me: but I am greatly astonished at the man's carelessness. Philotimus informed me that he could buy that lodge of Canuleius for 400 guineas, and could get it even for less, if I asked Vettienus to act as purchaser. So I did ask Vettienus to get a deduction from that sum, if he could. He promised. Lately he has informed me that he bought it for about £250, and asked me to inform him to whom I wished to convey it, adding that the day for payment was the 13th of November. My reply was somewhat cross, but yet in a familiar joking vein. Now, as he is acting handsomely, I have no charge against him, and I have written to him that you have informed me. Please let me know about your journey, what you intend to do and when.
April 16.
VI
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, April, B.C. 49
So far nothing stops me beyond the weather. I am not going to play a sharp game. Let what will happen in Spain, I have made up my mind to go. My plans have all been unfolded to you in previous letters; so this is a short one; also because I am in a hurry and rather busy.
As for young Quintus "surely I do my best,"[134] you
[134] Possibly a reference to Terence Adelphi 44, "Fit sedulo, nihil praetermitto, consuefacio."
reliqua. Quod dein me mones, et amice et prudenter me mones, sed erunt omnia facilia, si ab uno illo cavero. Magnum opus est, mirabilia multa, nihil simplex, nihil sincerum. Vellem suscepisses iuvenem regendum; pater enim nimis indulgens, quicquid ego adstrinxi, relaxat. Si sine illo possem, regerem; quod tu potes. Sed ignosco; magnum, inquam, opus est.
Pompeium pro certo habemus per Illyricum proficisci in Galliam. Ego nunc, qua et quo, videbo.
VII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano circ. IX K. Mai. a. 705
Ego vero Apuliam et Sipontum et tergiversationem istam probo, nec tuam rationem eandem esse duco quam meam, non quin in re publica rectum idem sit utrique nostrum, sed ea non agitur. Regnandi contentio est, in qua pulsus est modestior rex et probior et integrior et is, qui nisi vincit, nomen populi Romani deleatur necesse est, sin autem vincit, Sullano more exemploque vincet. Ergo hac in contentione neutrum tibi palam sentiendum et tempori serviendum est. Mea causa autem alia est, quod beneficio vinctus ingratus esse non possum, nec tamen in acie me, sed Melitae aut alio in loco simili futurum puto. "Nihil," inquies, "iuvas eum, in quem
know the rest. You go on to advise me, and you advise me like a prudent friend; but all will be simple, if I beware of the youngster. It is a big business; he is full of oddities and has no simplicity or sincerity. I wish you had undertaken his training; for his father is too kind. If I tighten the rein, he loosens it. If I could act without his father, I could manage the youngster, as you can do. But I excuse you. It is, as I say, a big business.
Pompey, I am certain, is marching through Illyricum into Gaul. By what route and whither I am now to travel, I shall see.
VII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, April 22(?), B.C. 49
Yes, I think you are right to hedge, and stay in Apulia and Sipontum: nor do I consider that your case is the same as mine. Of course in the matter of the constitution the right course is the same for both of us: but the constitution is not now in question. It is a struggle between two kings, in which defeat has overtaken the more moderate king, the one who is more upright and honest, the one whose failure means that the very name of the Roman people must be wiped out, though, if he wins the victory, he will use it after the manner and example of Sulla. Therefore in a contest like this you must not openly express your sentiments for either side, but must await the event. My case however is different. I am under the bond of an obligation, and cannot show ingratitude. But yet I do not fancy that I shall be found in the line of battle, but at Malta or some other similar place. You may say I
ingratus esse non vis?" Immo minus fortasse voluisset. Sed de hoc videbimus; exeamus modo. Quod ut meliore tempore possimus, facit Adriano mari Dolabella, Fretensi Curio.
Iniecta autem mihi spes quaedam est velle mecum Ser. Sulpicium conloqui. Ad eum misi Philotimum libertum cum litteris. Si vir esse volet, praeclara συνοδία, sin autem ——, erimus nos, qui solemus. Curio mecum vixit, iacere Caesarem putans offensione populari Siciliaeque diffidens, si Pompeius navigare coepisset.
Quintum puerum accepi vehementer. Avaritiam video fuisse et spem magni congiarii. Magnum hoc malum est, sed scelus illud, quod timueramus, spero nullum fuisse. Hoc autem vitium puto te existimare non a nostra indulgentia, sed a natura profectum. Quem tamen nos disciplina regemus.
De Oppiis Veliensibus quid placeat, cum Philotimo videbis. Epirum nostram putabimus, sed alios cursus videbamur habituri.
VIII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano VI Non. Mai. a. 705
Et res ipsa monebat, et tu ostenderas, et ego videbam de iis rebus, quas intercipi periculosum esset, finem inter nos scribendi fieri tempus esse. Sed, cum ad me saepe mea Tullia scribat orans, ut, quid in Hispania geratur, exspectem, et semper
do not help the man to whom I am loth to show ingratitude. No. Perhaps he would have been glad if I had helped him less. But that we shall see. Let me only get away. A fair opportunity is offered now that Dolabella is in the Adriatic and Curio in the straits of Sicily.
I have conceived some hope that Servius Sulpicius wishes to see me. I have dispatched Philotimus, my freedman, to him with a letter. If he wishes to play the man, we shall have a fine time together. But if not, well, I shall be my own old self. Curio stayed with me. He thinks that Caesar is falling in popular esteem and he is mistrustful about going to Sicily, if Pompey should begin a naval action.
The boy Quintus got it hot when he came. I see it was greed and the hope of a large bounty. This is a great evil; but disloyalty, which I feared, there was I hope none. But this flaw, I fancy you will gather, did not proceed from my spoiling him, but from his own temperament. Still, I must teach him discipline.
As to the Oppii of Velia, you will arrange with Philotimus as you think fit. Your place in Epirus I shall regard as my own; but it seems I shall go on another tack.
VIII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 2, B.C. 49
Circumstances advise, you have pointed out, and I see for myself, that it is time there was an end to our correspondence on topics which it is dangerous to have intercepted: but since my daughter often writes beseeching me to await the issue in Spain and
adscribat idem videri tibi, idque ipse etiam ex tuis litteris intellexerim, non puto esse alienum me ad te, quid de ea re sentiam, scribere.
Consilium istud tunc esset prudens, ut mihi videtur, si nostras rationes ad Hispaniensem casum accommodaturi essemus; quod fieri non debet.[135] Necesse est enim aut, id quod maxime velim, pelli istum ab Hispania, aut trahi id bellum, aut istum, ut confidere videtur, apprehendere Hispanias. Si pelletur, quam gratus aut quam honestus tum erit ad Pompeium noster adventus, cum ipsum Curionem ad eum transiturum putem? Si trahitur bellum, quid exspectem aut quam diu? Relinquitur, ut, si vincimur in Hispania, quiescamus. Id ego contra puto. Istum enim victorem magis relinquendum puto quam victum, et dubitantem magis quam fidentem suis rebus. Nam caedem video, si vicerit, et impetum in privatorum pecunias et exsulum reditum et tabulas novas et turpissimorum honores et regnum non modo Romano homini, sed ne Persae quidem cuiquam tolerabile. Tacita esse poterit indignitas nostra? pati poterunt oculi me cum Gabinio sententiam dicere, et quidem illum rogari prius? praesto esse clientem tuum Clodium, C. Atei Plaguleium, ceteros? Sed cur inimicos conligo, qui meos necessarios a me defensos nec videre in curia sine dolore nec versari inter eos sine dedecore potero? Quid, si ne id quidem est exploratum fore ut mihi liceat? Scribunt enim ad me amici eius me illi nullo modo satis
[135] non debet is omitted by the best MSS. and is probably only supplied by conjecture in P.
always adds that you think the same, and this is what I have gathered myself from your letters, I think it is well for me to write to you what I think about it.
The advice would be wise, it seems to me, only if I meant to shape my course according to what happens in Spain. That is impossible. For either, as I should much prefer, Caesar must be driven from Spain, or the war will drag on, or Caesar will seize Spain, as he seems to be confident. If Caesar is driven from Spain, you can imagine how pleasing and honourable my arrival will seem to Pompey, when I suppose even Curio will go over to him. If the war drags on, for what am I to wait or how long? The remaining alternative is that I should keep neutral, if we are beaten in Spain. I take the opposite view: for I think I am more bound to desert Caesar as victor than as vanquished, and while he is still doubtful rather than confident about his fortunes: for I foresee a massacre, if he conquers, attack on the wealth of private persons, the recall of exiles, repudiation of debts, high office for the vilest men, and a tyranny intolerable to a Persian much more to a Roman. Will my indignation be able to keep silence? Can my eyes endure to see myself giving my vote along with Gabinius, or indeed Gabinius being asked his opinion before me? Your client Clodius in waiting? Plaguleius, the client of C. Ateius, and all the others? But why do I make a list of opponents, when I shall be unable to see in the House without pain friends whom I have defended or to mix with them without shame? And what if even that may not be allowed to me, for all I know? For Caesar's friends write me that he is not at all
fecisse, quod in senatum non venerim. Tamenne dubitemus, an ei nos etiam cum periculo venditemus, quicum coniuncti ne cum praemio quidem voluimus esse? Deinde hoc vide, non esse iudicium de tota contentione in Hispaniis, nisi forte iis amissis arma Pompeium abiecturum putas, cuius omne consilium Themistocleum est. Existimat enim, qui mare teneat, eum necesse esse rerum potiri. Itaque numquam id egit, ut Hispaniae per se tenerentur, navalis apparatus ei semper antiquissima cura fuit. Navigabit igitur, cum erit tempus, maximis classibus et ad Italiam accedet. In qua nos sedentes quid erimus? nam medios esse iam non licebit. Classibus adversabimur igitur? Quod maius scelus aut tantum denique? quid turpius? anuival dehic in absentis[136] solus tuli scelus, eiusdem cum Pompeio et cum reliquis principibus non feram? Quodsi iam misso officio periculi ratio habenda est, ab illis est periculum, si peccaro, ab hoc, si recte fecero, nec ullum in his malis consilium periculo vacuum inveniri potest, ut non sit dubium, quin turpiter facere cum periculo fugiamus, quod fugeremus etiam cum salute. Non si[137] simul cum Pompeio mare transierimus? Omnino non potuimus. Exstat ratio dierum. Sed tamen—fateamur enim, quod est: ne condimus quidem—ut possimus, fefellit ea me res, quae fortasse non debuit, sed fefellit. Pacem putavi fore. Quae si esset, iratum mihi Caesarem esse, cum idem amicus
[136] The text here is hopelessly corrupt and no satisfactory emendation has been made. The translation gives the probable sense.
[137] si added by Tyrrell.
satisfied because I did not come to the Senate. Am I still to hesitate whether to sell myself to him at grave risk, when I refused to join him even with a certainty of reward. Besides consider this that the verdict on the whole contest does not depend on Spain; unless perhaps you think that, if Spain is lost, Pompey will throw down his arms, when his policy has always been that of Themistocles. He considers that the master of the sea must be master of the empire: so he has never planned to hold Spain for its own sake. The equipment of the fleet has always been his first care. So he will take to the sea in due season with a huge fleet and will come to Italy. What then will be the fate of us, if we stay here idle? Neutrality will be impossible. Shall we then resist the fleet? Could there be a crime deeper, greater or baser? Isolated I ran risks: shall I hesitate with the help of Pompey and the rest of the nobles. If now I am to take no account of duty but only of danger, it is from Pompey's party I run risk, if I do wrong, from Caesar, if I do right: and such is our evil plight that no plan is so free from danger as to leave a doubt that I should avoid doing with disgrace as well as danger what I should have avoided, if it had been safe. You will say I might safely have crossed the sea with Pompey. It was altogether impossible. It is easy to reckon the days: but nevertheless (for let me confess the truth: I do not even sugar my confession) supposing I could, I was mistaken over a point which perhaps ought not to have misled me; but it did. I thought that peace might be made: and, if it should be, I did not wish Caesar to be angry with me, when at the same time he was
esset Pompeio, nolui. Senseram enim, quam idem essent. Hoc verens in hanc tarditatem incidi. Sed assequor omnia, si propero, si cunctor, amitto. Et tamen, mi Attice, auguria quoque me incitant quadam spe non dubia, nec haec collegii nostri ab Atto, sed illa Platonis de tyrannis. Nullo enim modo posse video stare istum diutius, quin ipse per se etiam languentibus nobis concidat, quippe qui florentissimus ac novus VI, VII diebus ipsi illi egenti ac perditae multitudini in odium acerbissimum venerit, qui duarum rerum simulationem tam cito amiserit, mansuetudinis in Metello, divitiarum in aerario. Iam quibus utatur vel sociis vel ministris? ii provincias, ii rem publicam regent, quorum nemo duo menses potuit patrimonium suum gubernare?
Non sunt omnia colligenda, quae tu acutissime perspicis, sed tamen ea pone ante oculos; iam intelleges id regnum vix semenstre esse posse. Quod si me fefellerit, feram, sicut multi clarissimi homines in re publica excellentes tulerunt, nisi forti me Sardanapalli vicem [in suo lectulo][138] mori malle censueris quam exsilio Themistocleo. Qui com fuisset, ut ait Thucydides, τῶν μὲν παρόντων δι' ἐλαχίστης βουλῆς κράτιστος γνώμων, τῶν δὲ μελλόντων ἐς πλεῖστον τοῦ γενησομένου ἄριστος εἰκαστής, tamen incidit in eos
[138] The words in brackets are deleted by Nipperdey as a gloss.
friendly with Pompey. For I had realized how exactly they were alike. That fear of mine led me to delay. But I gain all now by haste, and, if I delay, I lose all. Nevertheless, my friend, there are auguries which urge me on, with hope not uncertain: I do not mean those of my own college which came down from Attus Navius: but Plato's words about the tyrant.[139] For I see that Caesar can in no way maintain his position much longer, without causing his own fall, even if we are backward. For in his first and flourishing days it did not take him a week to incur the bitter hatred of the needy abandoned rabble, by letting slip through his fingers so quickly his fictitious claim to two things, clemency in the case of Metellus and ample wealth in the case of the public money. Now what kind of associates and servants can he employ? Are men to rule provinces and direct affairs not one of whom could steer his own fortunes for two months?
[139] Probably Republic VIII, 562.
I need not put all the points together; you see them clearly enough: but put them before your eyes and you will understand that his reign can hardly last for half a year. If I am mistaken, I will bear the consequences, as many illustrious men, eminent in public life, have borne them, unless perhaps you consider that I should prefer to die like Sardanapalus [in his bed] rather than like Themistocles in exile. For Thucydides tells us that though Themistocles was "the best judge of current affairs on the shortest reflection, and the shrewdest to guess at what would happen in the future," yet he fell into misfortunes, which he would have escaped, had there been no
casus, quos vitasset, si eum nihil fefellisset. Etsi is erat, ut ait idem, qui τὸ ἄμεινον καὶ τὸ χεῖρον ἐν τῷ ἀφανεῖ ἔτι ἑώρα μάλιστα, tamen non vidit, nec quo modo Lacedaemoniorum nec quo modo suorum civium invidiam effugeret nec quid Artaxerxi polliceretur. Non fuisset illa nox tam acerba Africano, sapientissimo viro, non tam dirus ille dies Sullanus callidissimo viro, C. Mario, si nihil utrumque eorum fefellisset. Nos tamen hoc confirmamus illo augurio, quo diximus, nec nos fallit, nec aliter accidet. Corruat iste necesse est aut per adversarios aut ipse per se, qui quidem sibi est adversarius unus acerrimus. Id spero vivis nobis fore; quamquam tempus est nos de illa perpetua iam, non de hac exigua vita cogitare. Sin quid accident maturius, haud sane mea multum interfuerit, utrum factum videam an futurum esse multo ante viderim. Quae cum ita sint, non est committendum, ut iis paream, quos contra me senatus, ne quid res publica detrimenti acciperet, armavit.
Tibi sunt omnia commendata, quae commendationis meae pro tuo in nos amore non indigent. Nec hercule ego quidem reperio, quid scribam; sedeo enim πλουδοκῶν. Etsi nihil umquam tam fuit scribendum quam nihil mihi umquam ex plurimis tuis iucunditatibus
error in his calculations. Though he was, as the same writer says, "a clear-sighted judge of the better and the worse course in a doubtful crisis,"[140] yet he failed to see how to avoid the hate of the Spartans and his own fellow-citizens, nor what promise he ought to make to Artaxerxes. Africanus would have been spared that cruel night,[141] and that master of craft C. Marius the fateful day of Sulla's triumph, if nothing had ever escaped their calculations. So I strengthen myself by that prophetic remark of Plato: I am not deceived nor will it happen otherwise. Caesar is bound to fall either through the agency of his enemies or of himself, and he is his own worst enemy. I hope it will be in our lifetime, though it is an occasion for us to consider the lasting future and not our own narrow life. If anything happens to me before that day, it will not have mattered to me much whether I see it come about or foresee that it will happen long before. Since this is so, I must not obey men against whom the Senate armed me with power to see that the Republic took no harm.[142]
[140] Thucydides i, 138.
[141] P. Scipio Africanus the younger was found dead in his bed, and was supposed to have been murdered at Carbo's instigation.
[142] Cf. Ad Fam. XVI, 11, where he states that the Senate gave a general commission to all magistrates and ex-consuls "ne quid respublica detrimenti caperet."
To you all my interests have been entrusted, though they need no entrusting considering your great affection for me. I have nothing to write, for I sit waiting to sail. Yet I never wanted so much to write anything, as I want to tell you that of your
gratius accidisse, quam quod meam Tulliam suavissime diligentissimeque coluisti. Valde eo ipsa delectata est, ego autem non minus. Cuius quidem virtus mirifica. Quo modo illa fert publicam cladem, quo modo domesticas tricas! quantus autem animus in discessu nostro! Est στοργή, est summa σύντηξις. Tamen nos recte facere et bene audire vult. Sed hac super re ne nimis, ne meam ipse συμπάθειαν iam evocem.
Tu, si quid de Hispaniis certius et si quid aliud, dum adsumus, scribes, et ego fortasse discedens dabo ad te aliquid, eo etiam magis, quod Tullia te non putabat hoc tempore ex Italia. Cum Antonio item est agendum ut cum Curione Melitae me velle esse, huic civili bello nolle interesse. Eo velim tam facili uti possim et tam bono in me quam Curione. Is ad Misenum VI Nonas venturus dicebatur, id est hodie. Sed praemisit mihi odiosas litteras hoc exemplo:
VIIIa
"ANTONIUS TRIB. PL. PRO PR. CICERONI IMP. SAL.
Nisi te valde amarem, et multo quidem plus, quam tu putas, non extimuissem rumorem, qui de te prolatus est, cum praesertim falsum esse existimarem. Sed, quia te nimio plus diligo, non possum dissimulare mihi famam quoque, quamvis sit falsa, magni esse. Te iturum esse[143] trans mare credere non possum, cum tanti facias Dolabellam et Tulliam tuam, feminam
[143] Te iturum esse added by Baiter.
many kindnesses none has given me greater pleasure than your very gracious and constant care of Tullia. She herself has been charmed and I not less. She has shown admirable qualities, has borne the national calamity and private worries with great fortitude and displayed it over my departure. She loves me and sympathizes with me and yet wishes me to act rightly and keep my good repute. But enough of this, lest I begin to pity myself.
If you get more certain tidings about Spain or any other matter, pray write and tell me while I am here, and perhaps at the time of going I may send you news, the more so because Tullia fancies that you are not leaving Italy at the present moment. I must explain to Antony as I did to Curio that I want to stay in Malta and refuse to take part in this civil war. I only hope that I may find him as easy and good to me as I found Curio. He will come it is said to Misenum on the second, that is to-day; but he has sent in advance a nasty letter of which I subjoin a copy:
VIIIa
"ANTONIUS TRIBUNE PROPRAETOR GREETING TO CICERO IMPERATOR.
"Had I not a great affection for you, and much more than you think, I should not have been alarmed at a report which has been spread about you, especially as I thought it to be false. But, just because I like you so very much, I cannot hide from myself that the report, although it may be false, causes me great concern. That you are about to go over seas I cannot believe, when you have such dear regard for Dolabella
lectissimam, tantique ab omnibus nobis fias; quibus mehercule dignitas amplitudoque tua paene carior est quam tibi ipsi. Sed tamen non sum arbitratus esse amici non commoveri etiam improborum sermone, atque eo feci studiosius, quod iudicabam duriores partes mihi impositas esse ob offensione nostra, quac magis a ζηλοτυπίᾳ mea quam ab iniuria tua nata est. Sic enim volo te tibi persuadere, mihi neminem esse cariorem te excepto Caesare meo meque illud una indicare, Caesarem maxime in suis M. Ciceronem reponere. Quare, mi Cicero, te rogo, ut tibi omina integra serves, eius fidem improbes, qui tibi, ut beneficium daret, prius iniuriam fecit, contra ne profugias, qui te, esti non amabit, quod accidere non potest, tamen salvum amplissimumque esse cupiet.
Dedita opera ad te Calpurnium, familiarissimum meum, misi, ut mihi magnae curae tuam vitam ac dignitatem esse scires."
Eodem die a Caesare Philotimus litteras attulit hoc exemplo:
VIIIb
"CAESAR IMP. SAL. D. CICERONI IMP.
Etsi te nihil temere, nihil imprudenter facturum iudicaram, tamen permotus hominum fama scribendum ad te existimavi, et pro nostra benevolentia petendum, ne quo progredereris proclinata iam re, quo integra
and your daughter Tullia, that queen among women, and you are rated so highly by all of us, who, I dare swear, care almost more than you do for your dignity and position. However, I considered that it was no part of a friend to be unmoved even when scoundrels talked, and I have been more particular, because I thought that a harder task was laid upon me by our disagreement, which sprang more from jealousy on my part than from wrong on yours; for I want you to convince yourself that no one is dearer to me than you, except Caesar, and at the same time I am positive that Caesar reckons M. Cicero highly among his friends. So my dear Cicero I beg you not to commit yourself and not to rely on the honour of a man, who for the sake of conferring a kindness first did you a harm, and on the other hand not to flee from a man, who although he will not love you, which is out of the question, will always wish you to be safe and in high distinction.
"I have taken the trouble to send you Calpurnius, an intimate friend of mine, that you may know I am greatly concerned for your life and position."
On the same day Philotimus brought me a letter from Caesar of which this is a copy:
VIIIb
"CAESAR IMPERATOR TO CICERO IMPERATOR, GREETING.
"Although I had concluded that you would do nothing rashly or imprudently, nevertheless I have been so stirred by what people say that I thought it best to write to you and ask you in the name of our goodwill to each other not to go anywhere, now that fortune inclines my way, where you did not think it
etiam progrediendum tibi non existimasses. Namque et amicitiae graviorem iniuriam feceris et tibi minus commode consulueris, si non fortunae obsecutus videbere (omnia enim secundissima nobis, adversissima illis accidisse videntur), nec causam secutus (eadem enim tum fuit, cum ab eorum consiliis abesse iudicasti), sed meum aliquod factum condemnavisse; quo mihi gravius abs te nil accidere potest. Quod ne facias, pro iure nostrae amicitiae a te peto. Postremo quid viro bono et quieto et bono civi magis convenit quam abesse a civilibus controversiis? Quod non nulli cum probarent, periculi causa sequi non potuerunt; tu explorato et vitae meae testimonio et amicitiae iudicio neque tutius neque honestius reperies quicquam quam ab omni contentione abesse.
XV Kal. Maias ex itinere."
IX
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano V Non. Mai. a. 705
Adventus Philotimi (at cuius hominis, quam insulsi et quam saepe pro Pompeio mentientis!) exanimavit omnes, qui mecum erant; nam ipse obdurui. Dubitabat nostrum nemo, quin Caesar itinera repressisset—volare dicitur; Petreius cum Afranio coniunxisset se—nihil adfert eius modi. Quid quaeris? etiam illud erat persuasum, Pompeium cum magnis copiis iter in
necessary to go before anything was certain. For you will have done a serious injury to our friendship and consulted your own interest very little, if you show that you are not following fortune (for everything that has happened seems most favourable to me and most unfavourable to Pompey), nor yet following the right cause (for the cause was the same then, when you thought fit to hold aloof from it), but that you have condemned some act of mine, the greatest harm you could do me. Do not take such a step, I pray you by the right of our friendship. Finally what better befits a good and peaceful man and a loyal citizen than to keep out of civil disturbance. There are some who approved such a course, but could not follow it because of the danger. But you may examine the evidence of my life and the opinion given by my friendship[144]; you will find no safer or more honourable course than to keep quite clear of the quarrel.
[144] i.e. my decision to let you be neutral. It may, however, mean "Your conviction of my friendship."
"April 16 on the march."
IX
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 3, B.C. 49
The arrival of Philotimus (what a fellow he is! how stupid! how often he lies on Pompey's behalf!) has frightened the rest of us to death. For myself I am hardened. None of us doubted that Caesar had checked Pompey's progress: Philotimus says he is simply flying. Nobody doubted that Petreius had joined Afranius: he brings no such news. In fact we have all been sure that Pompey had actually made
Germaniam per Illyricum fecisse; id enim αὐθεντικῶς nuntiabatur, Melitam igitur, opinor, capessamus, dum, quid in Hispania. Quod quidem prope modum videor ex Caesaris litteris ipsius voluntate facere posse, qui negat neque honestius neque tutius mihi quicquam esse quam ab omni contentione abesse. Dices: "Ubi ille ergo tuus animus, quem proximis litteris?" Adest et idem est; sed utinam meo solum capite decernerem! Lacrimae meorum me interdum molliunt precantium ut de Hispaniis exspectemus. M. Caeli quidem epistulam scriptam miserabiliter, cum hoc idem obsecraret, ut exspectarem, ne fortunas meas, ne unicum filium, ne meos omnes tam temere proderem non sine magno fletu legerunt pueri nostri. Etsi meus quidem est fortior, eoque ipso vehementius commovet, nec quicquam nisi de dignatione laborat.
Melitam igitur, deinde, quo videbitur. Tu tamen etiam nunc mihi aliquid litterarum, et maxime, si quid ab Afranio. Ego, si cum Antonio locutus ero, scribam ad te, quid actum sit. Ero tamen in credendo, ut mones, cautus; nam occultandi ratio cum difficilis tum etiam periculosa est. Servium exspecto ad Nonas, et adigit ita Postumia et Servius filius. Quartanam leviorem esse gaudeo. Misi ad te Caeli etiam litterarum exemplum.
IXa = ad fam. VIII 16.
CAELIUS CICERONI SAL.
Scr. Intimili XV K. Mai. a. 705
Exanimatus tuis litteris, quibus te nihil nisi triste cogitare ostendisti, neque, id quid esset, perscripsisti,
his way with large forces into Germany through Illyricum, for that was the news sans doute. So I think I must make for Malta, until there is news from Spain. This from Caesar's letter I almost think I may do without annoying him, for he says there is no more honourable or safe course open to me than to keep quite clear of the fight. You will say "Where then is your courage which you showed in recent letters?" It is there and the same; but would that I had only to decide for myself. The tears of my family at times weaken me, when they beg me to wait for news about Spain. The miserable tone of M. Caelius' letter making this same request that I should wait, not to risk so rashly my fortunes, my only son and all my family, moved our boys to weeping; although my own son is made of stronger stuff, and for that very reason he affects me more deeply, thinking only of my reputation.
So I shall go to Malta, thence where it seems good. Still even now send me a line, especially if there is any news from Afranius. If I have an interview with Antony, I will inform you of the result. However, as you advise, I will take care how I trust him, for the policy of concealment is hard and dangerous too. Servius Sulpicius I await till the 7th. Both his wife Postumia and his son urge me to this. I rejoice that your ague is better. I send you also a copy of Caelius' letter.
IXa
CAELIUS TO CICERO, GREETING.
Intimile, Apr. 16, B.C. 49
In my dismay at your letter, in which you show that your thoughts are set on some unhappy act
neque non tamen, quale esset, quod cogitates, aperuisti, has ad te ilico litteras scripsi. Per fortunas tuas, Cicero, per liberos te oro et obsecro, ne quid gravius de salute et incolumitate tua consulas. Nam deos hominesque amicitiamque nostram testificor me tibi praedixisse neque temere monuisse, sed, postquam Caesarem convenerim sententiamque eius, qualis futura esset parta victoria, cognorim, te certiorem fecisse. Si existimas eandem rationem fore Caesaris in dimittendis adversariis et condicionibus ferendis, erras; nihil nisi atrox et saevum cogitat atque etiam loquitur; iratus senatui exiit, his intercessionibus plane incitatus est; non mehercules erit deprecationi locus. Quare, si tibi tu, si filius unicus, si domus, si spes tuae reliquae tibi carae sunt, si aliquid apud te nos, si vir optimus, gener tuus, valemus, quorum fortunam non debes velle conturbare, noli committere,[145] ut eam causam, in cuius victoria salus nostra est, odisse aut relinquere cogamur, aut impiam cupiditatem contra salutem tuam habeamus. Denique illud cogita, quod offensae fuerit in ista cunctatione, te subisse. Nunc te contra victorem Caesarem facere, quem dubiis rebus laedere noluisti, et ad eos fugatos accedere, quos resistentes sequi nolueris, summae stultitiae est. Vide, ne, dum pudet te parum optimatem esse, parum diligenter, quid optimum sit, eligas. Quod si totum tibi persuadere non possum, saltem, dum, quid de Hispaniis agamus, scitur,
[145] noli committere added by Lehmann.
without saying exactly what it is, though you disclose sufficiently what kind of an act it is, I write this on the spot. In the name of your fortunes and your children, I beg and beseech you, Cicero, not to take any step that may endanger your life and safety. For I call gods and men and our friendship to witness that I told you before, and that it was no casual warning that I gave you, but certain information, after I had met Caesar and found out what his view would be, if he won the victory. If you imagine that he will maintain his present policy of letting his adversaries go and making peace, you are mistaken; he is meditating and even proclaiming nothing but cruelty and severity. He left Rome in anger with the Senate: these recent vetoes have clearly provoked him: you may take my word for it there will be no chance of begging off. Then, if you have any care for yourself, your only son, your house and what hopes you have left, if I and your excellent son-in-law have any influence with you—and you ought not to wish to spoil our fortunes—then do not compel us to hate or relinquish a cause, in whose victory our safety lies, or to harbour unnatural wishes for your destruction. Finally consider this: any offence there may have been in your hesitation, you have already given. Now it is the height of folly to side against Caesar in his hour of victory, when you refused to attack him while his fortunes were doubtful; and to join in the flight of those, whom you would not follow when they stood their ground. Beware lest for fear of showing too little zeal for the "better party," you use too little care in choosing the better course. But, if I cannot persuade you entirely, at least wait till it is known how we get on in Spain,
exspecta; quas tibi nuntio adventu Caesaris fore nostras. Quam isti spem habeant amissis Hispaniis, nescio; quod porro tuum consilium sit ad desperatos accedere, non medius fidius reperio.
Hoc, quod tu non dicendo mihi significasti, Caesar audierat, ac, simul atque "have" mihi dixit, statim, quid de te audisset, exposuit. Negavi me scire, sed tamen ab eo petivi, ut ad te litteras mitteret, quibus maxime ad remanendum commoveri posses. Me secum in Hispaniam ducit. Nam, nisi ita faceret, ego, priusquam ad urbem accederem, ubicumque esses, ad te percucurrissem, et hoc a te praesens contendissem atque omni vi te retinuissem. Etiam atque etiam, Cicero, cogita, ne te tuosque omnis funditus evertas, ne te sciens prudensque eo demittas, unde exitum vides nullum esse. Quodsi te aut voces optimatium commovent, aut non nullorum hominum insolentiam et iactationem ferre non potes, eligas censeo aliquod oppidum vacuum a bello, dum haec decernuntur; quae iam erunt confecta. Id si feceris, et ego te sapienter fecisse iudicabo, et Caesarem non offendes.
X
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano V Non. Mai. a. 705
Me caecum, qui haec ante non viderim! Misi ad te epistulam Antoni. Ei cum ego saepissime scripsissem nihil me contra Caesaris rationes cogitare, meminisse me generi mei, meminisse amicitiae, potuisse,
which I assure you will be ours as soon as Caesar arrives. What your friends' hopes are, when they have lost Spain, is more than I know; and what your idea is in joining them, when they have no hopes, is more than I can imagine.
What you hinted at without speaking plainly, Caesar had heard, and as soon as ever he had said "good day," he told me what he had heard about you. I said I knew nothing about it: but I asked him to send you a letter as the best means of inducing you to stay. He is taking me with him to Spain. If he were not, I should have hurried to you, before going to Rome, wherever you might have been, and should have pressed this view on you personally and done all in my power to restrain you. Once more and yet once more, Cicero, think before you utterly destroy yourself and all your family: do not wittingly and with your eyes open put yourself in a position from which you see there is no escape. But, if you are moved by the call of the conservative party, or if you cannot endure the insolence and arrogant behaviour of certain persons, I think you should choose some town remote from the war, until the matter is settled: and settled it will be at once. If you do that, I shall consider you have acted wisely, and Caesar will not be offended.
X
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 3, B.C. 49
How blind I am not to have foreseen it! I send you Antony's letter. I have often written to him that I planned nothing against Caesar's policy, that I was mindful of my son-in-law, of our friendship,
si aliter sentirem, esse cum Pompeio; me autem, quia cum lictoribus invitus cursarem, abesse velle, nec id ipsum certum etiam nunc habere, vide, quam ad haec παραινετικῶς:
"Tuum consilium quam verum est. Nam, qui se medium esse vult, in patria manet, qui proficiscitur, aliquid de altera utra parte iudicare videtur. Sed ego is non sum, qui statuere debeam, iure quis proficiscatur necne; partes mihi Caesar has imposuit, ne quem omnino discedere ex Italia paterer. Quare parvi refert me probare cogitationem tuam, si nihil tamen tibi remittere possum. Ad Caesarem mittas censeo et ab eo hoc petas. Non dubito, quin impetraturus sis, cum praesertim te amicitiae nostrae rationem habiturum esse pollicearis."
Habes σκυτάλην Λακωνικήν. Omnino excipiam hominem. Erat autem v Nonas venturus vesperi, id est hodie. Cras igitur ad me fortasse veniet. Temptabo, audiam: nihil properare; missurum ad Caesarem. Clam agam, cum paucissimis alicubi occultabor, certe hinc istis invitissimis evolabo, atque utinam ad Curionem! Σύνες ὅ τοι λέγω. Magnus dolor accessit. Efficietur aliquid dignum nobis.
Δυσουρία tua mihi valde molesta. Medere, amabo,
that, if I had thought otherwise, I could have been with Pompey, that I wished to leave Italy because I was loth to wander about with my lictors, though I had not made up my mind definitely even to that. See in what an ex cathedra tone he answers me:—"Your policy is quite right. For a man who wishes to be neutral remains in his country; the man who leaves his country seems to express his conviction on one side or the other; but it is not for me to determine, whether anyone has the right to leave or not. The part Caesar has given me is not to let anyone at all leave Italy; so it is of little use for me to approve your plan, if all the same I cannot make an exception for you. I think you should send to Caesar and ask him this favour. I have no doubt that you will succeed, especially as you promise not to forget our friendship."
That is a laconic epistle.[146] I will certainly take my cue from the man. He is to come on the evening of the 3rd, that is to-day. To-morrow therefore he will perhaps come to me. I will sound him: I will hear him: say I am in no hurry: that I will send to Caesar. I will act secretly, with a very few attendants I will lie hidden somewhere; but assuredly, however unwilling these people are, I will fly off; and would that it may be to Curio! "Mark what I say."[147] Another great grief has come upon me. I will do something worthy of my reputation.
[146] Lit. "Laconian staff." Spartan dispatches were wound round a staff in such a way that they could not be read when taken off it. Here, however, Cicero only refers to their brevity.
[147] Probably a quotation from Pindar, Frag. 105.
Your malady gives me grave anxiety. I pray you
dum est ἀρχή. De Massiliensibus gratae tuae mihi litterae. Quaeso, ut sciam, quicquid audieris. Ocellam cuperem, si possem palam, quod a Curione effeceram, Hic ego Servium exspecto; rogor enim ab eius uxore et filio, et puto opus esse. Hic tamen Cytherida secum lectica aperta portat, alteram uxorem. Septem praeterea coniunctae lecticae amicarum sunt an amicorum. Vide, quam turpi leto pereamus, et dubita, si potes, quin ille, seu victus seu victor redierit, caedem facturus sit. Ego vero vel luntriculo, si navis non erit, eripiam me ex istorum parricidio. Sed plura scribam, cum illum convenero.
Iuvenem nostrum non possum non amare, sed ab eo nos non amari plane intellego. Nihil ego vidi tam ἀνηθοποίητον, tam aversum a suis, tam nescio quid cogitans. O vim incredibilem molestiarum! Sed erit curae, et est, ut regatur. Mirum est enim ingenium, ἤθους ἐπιμελητέον.
XI
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano IV Non. Mai. a 705
Obsignata iam epistula superiore, non placuit ei dari, cui constitueram, quod erat alienus. Itaque eo die data non est. Interim venit Philotimus et mihi
get medical advice in its initial stage. Your letter about the Massilians[148] pleased me. Let me know whatever you hear. I should have liked to have Ocella, if it could be done openly, and I had got Curio to allow it. Here I am awaiting Servius Sulpicius, for it is at the request of his wife and son, and I think it is necessary. Antony carries about Cytheris[149] with him in an open litter as his second wife, and besides he had seven other litters of friends male or female. See what a disgraceful death we die, and doubt, if you can, that, whether Caesar returns victor or vanquished, he will perpetrate a massacre. Even in an open boat, if I cannot get a vessel, I will tear myself away from these parricides and their doings. But I will write more when I have met him.
[148] They had shut their gates to Caesar and were being besieged.
[149] An actress.
My nephew I cannot but love, though I see clearly that he has no affection for me. I never saw anyone so unprincipled, so averse to his own relations, with such mysterious plans. What a weight of anxiety! But it will be my business, as it is now, to discipline him: he has wonderful ability, but his character requires training.
XI
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 4, B.C. 49
After sealing my former letter, I did not feel inclined to hand it to the person that I had intended, as he was a stranger; so it was not despatched on that day. Meantime Philotimus came and gave me
a te litteras reddidit. Quibus quae de fratre meo scribis, sunt ea quidem parum firma, se habent nihil ὕπουλον, nihil fallax, nihil non flexibile ad bonitatem, nihil, quod non, quo velis, uno sermone possis perducere; ne multa, omnes suos, etiam quibus irascitur crebrius, tamen caros habet, me quidem se ipso cariorem. Quod de puero aliter ad te scripsit et ad matrem de filo, non reprehendo. De itinere[150] et de sorore quae scribis, molesta sunt, eoque magis, quod ea tempora nostra sunt, ut ego iis mederi non possim. Nam certe mederer; sed, quibus in malis et qua in desperatione rerum simus, vides.
[150] itinere most editors: itine MZ: Quinto Tyrrell.
Illa de ratione nummaria non sunt eius modi (saepe enim audio ex ipso), ut non cupiat tibi praestare et in eo laboret. Sed, si mihi Q. Axius in hac mea fuga HS XIII non reddit, quae dedi eius filio mutua, et utitur excusatione temporis, si Lepta, si ceteri, soleo mirari, de nescio quis HS XX cum audio ex illo se urgeri. Vides enim profecto angustias. Curari tamen ea tibi utique iubet. An existimas illum in isto genere lentulum aut restrictum? Nemo est minus. De fratre satis.
De eius iuvene filio, indulsit illi quidem suus pater semper, sed non facit indulgentia mendacem aut avarum aut non amantem suorum, ferocem fortasse atque arrogantem et infestum facit. Itaque habet haec quoque, quae nascuntur ex indulgentia, sed ea sunt tolerabilia (quid enim dicam?) hac inventute; ea vero,
a letter from you. The conduct of my brother about which you write shows little firmness, but no chicanery, no treachery, nothing inflexibly opposed to goodness, nothing that cannot be turned where you will by a single conversation. In short all his relations, even those with whom he is so often angry, are nevertheless dear to him, and I to be sure am dearer than life. I do not blame him for writing in one strain about his boy to you and in another to the boy's mother. I am distressed by what you say about the journey and your sister, and the more so because the times are such that I cannot remedy the matter. For certainly I would have done so: but you see in what trouble I am, what desperation.
13,000 sesterces
20,000 sesterces
As for his financial affairs, I often hear from him, and they are not in such a state as to prevent him from being anxious to pay you and from making efforts to that end: but if Q. Axius does not pay me in this my flight the £100 I lent his son, and pleads in excuse the state of the times, and if Lepta and others do the same, I confess I am always surprised to hear from Quintus that he is pressed for some £175. For of course you see his straits. However he has ordered the sum to be paid to your account. Perhaps you suppose that he is slow or close-fisted in money matters. No one is less so: but enough about my brother.
As for his son, the father has certainly always indulged him; but indulgence does not make him a liar or a miser or disloyal to his friends, though it does perhaps make him surly, haughty and aggressive. Accordingly he has these defects which are due to spoiling; but they are not intolerable, shall I say, as young men go nowadays. But the defects which, to
quae mihi quidem, qui illum amo, sunt his ipsis malis, in quis sumus, miseriora, non sunt ab obsequio nostro. Nam suas radices habent; quas tamen evellerem profecto, si liceret. Sed ea tempora sunt, ut omnia mihi sint patienda. Ego meum facile teneo; nihil est enim eo tractabilius. Cuius quidem misericordia languidiora adhuc consilia cepi, et, quo ille me certiorem vult esse, eo magis timeo, ne in eum exsistam crudelior.
Sed Antonius venit heri vesperi. Iam fortasse ad me veniet, aut ne id quidem, quoniam scripsit, quid fieri vellet. Sed scies continuo, quid actum sit. Nos iam nihil nisi occulte.
De pueris quid agam? parvone navigio committam? Quid mihi animi in navigando censes fore? Recordor enim, aestate cum illis illo Rhodiorum ἀφράκτῳ navigans quam fuerim sollicitus; quid duro tempore anni actuariola fore censes? O rem undique miseram!
Trebatius erat mecum, vir plane et civis bonus. Quae ille monstra, di immortales! Etiamne Balbus in senatum venire cogitet? Sed ei ipsi cras ad te litteras dabo. Vettienum mihi amicum, ut scribis, ita puto esse. Cum eo, quod ἀποτόμως ad me scripserat de nummis curandis, θυμικώτερον eram iocatus. Id tu, si ille aliter acceperit ac debuit, lenies. "Monetali" autem adscripsi, quod ille ad me "PRO COS." Sed, quoniam est homo et nos diligit, ipse quoque a nobis diligatur. Vale.
me at any rate who love him, are more distressing than even the evils on which we have fallen, do not proceed from any indulgence of mine; for they are deep rooted: but I would have rooted them up, had I been allowed. But the times are such that I must bear everything. My own son I control easily. He is quite tractable. My own policy has lacked vigour owing to my pity for him; and the more he wants me to be unflinching, the more I fear I may prove cruel to him.
Well Antony came yesterday evening; soon perhaps he will visit me, perhaps not even that, as he has written what he wanted done; but you shall know forthwith what has happened. All I do now is done secretly.
What shall I do about the boys? Shall I entrust them to a small boat? What courage do you suppose I shall have on the voyage? For I remember sailing in the summer in an open Rhodian boat with them and how anxious I was; and how do you suppose it will be in the bad season in a tiny pinnace? Misery everywhere!
Trebatius is with me, a real man and a loyal citizen. Ye gods, what awful news he brings! So even Balbus is thinking of attending the Senate! But I will give Trebatius himself a letter for you to-morrow. I agree with your letter that Vettienus is friendly to me. But I made a rather bitter jest at his expense, because he wrote curtly to me about paying my debt. Appease him, if he took it in bad part. I addressed him by his title "commissioner of the mint" because he addressed me as "proconsul." But since he is a good man and has affection for me, let me keep my affection for him. Farewell.
XII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano III Non. Mai. a. 705
Quidnam mihi futurum est, aut quis me non solum infelicior, sed iam etiam turpior? Nominatim de me sibi imperatum dicit Antonius, nec me tamen ipse adhuc viderat, sed hoc Trebatio narravit. Quid agam nunc, cui nihil procedit, caduntque ea, quae diligentissime sunt cogitata, taeterrime? Ego enim Curionem nactus omnia me consecutum putavi. Is de me ad Hortensium scripserat. Reginus erat totus noster. Huic nihil suspicabamur cum hoc mari negotii fore. Quo me nunc vertam? Undique custodior. Sed satis lacrimis. Παρακλεπτέον igitur et occulte in aliquam onerariam corrependum, non committendum, ut etiam compacto prohibiti videamur. Sicilia petenda. Quam si erimus nacti, maiora quaedam consequemur. Sit modo recte in Hispaniis! Quamquam de ipsa Sicilia utinam sit verum! Sed adhuc nihil secundi. Concursus Siculorum ad Catonem dicitur factus, orasse, ut resisteret, omnia pollicitos; commotum illum dilectum habere coepisse. Non credo, ut est luculentus auctor. Potuisse certe teneri illam provinciam scio. Ab Hispaniis autem iam audietur.
Hic nos C. Marcellum habemus, eadem vere cogitantem aut bene simulantem; quamquam ipsum non videram, sed ex familiarissimo eius audiebam. Tu, quaeso, si quid habebis novi; ego, si quid moliti erimus, ad te statim scribam. Quintum filium severius
XII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 5, B.C. 49
What is to happen to me? Who is there more ill-starred, or even more humiliated? Antony says he has received orders about me definitely. Yet I have not seen him myself so far; but he told Trebatius. What can I do now? Nothing succeeds and all my best laid plans fail abominably. For, when I had won over Curio, I imagined I had attained my end. He had written about me to Hortensius. Reginus was wholly my friend. I never suspected that Antony had anything to do with this part of the sea. Whither can I turn now? Everywhere I am watched. But enough of lamentation. I must steal away and creep privily into some cargo boat; I must not allow it to appear that I connive at being hindered. I must go to Sicily. If I once get there, I shall have greater ends in view. If only all goes well in Spain! However, I do hope the news about Sicily may prove true! Hitherto I have had no luck. It is said the Sicilians have gathered round Cato, prayed him to resist and promised every support: and that he has been induced to begin making a levy. I don't believe it, good as the authority is. I know for a fact that that province could have been held. But we shall soon hear from Spain.
Here I have C. Marcellus, who holds the same views as myself or makes a good pretence of doing so. I have not indeed met him myself; but I hear it from one of his most intimate friends. Write to me, if you have any news. If I attempt anything, I shall inform you at once. Young Quintus I shall handle
adhibebo. Utinam proficere possim! Tu tamen eas epistulas, quibus asperius de eo scripsi, aliquando concerpito, ne quando quid emanet; ego item tuas. Servium exspecto, nec ab eo quicquam ὑγιές. Scies, quicquid erit.
XIIa
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano prid. Non. Mai. a. 705
Sine dubio errasse nos confitendum est. "At semel, at una in re." Immo omnia quo diligentius cogitata eo facta sunt imprudentius.
Ἀλλὰ τὰ μὲν προτετύχθαι ἐάσομεν ἀχνύμενοί περ, in reliquis modo ne ruamus. Iubes de profectione me providere. Quid provideam? Ita patent omnia, quae accidere possunt, ut, ea si vitem, sedendum sit cum dedecore et dolore, si neglegam, periculum sit, ne in manus incidam perditorum. Sed vide, quantis in miseriis simus. Optandum interdum videtur, ut aliquam accipiamus ab istis quamvis acerbam iniuriam, ut tyranno in odio fuisse videamur. Quodsi nobis is cursus, quem speraram, pateret, effecissem aliquid profecto, ut tu optas et hortaris, dignum nostra mora. Sed mirificae sunt custodiae, et quidem ille ipse Curio suspectus. Quare vi aut clam agendum est et, si vi, fortiter cum tempestate.[151] Clam autem istis? In quo si quod σφάλμα, vides, quam turpe sit. Trahimur, nec fugiendum, si quid violentius.
[151] et si vi forte ne cum pestate M: et si vi forte et cum tempestate Ant., F. I have adopted Orelli's reading; but it is very uncertain.
with severity. I hope my efforts may succeed. But please some time tear up the letters in which I criticize him severely, for fear anything ever come to light. I will tear up yours. Servius Sulpicius I am still awaiting, nor do I hear anything satisfactory from him. You shall know whatever happens.
XIIa
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 6, B.C. 49
Undoubtedly I must admit I have been mistaken. But is it once only or on one topic? No, in everything. The more carefully I have thought, the less wisely have I done. "Let bygones be bygones."[152] In the future only let us not invite disaster. You bid me provide for my journey. What can I provide? All the possible accidents are so obvious, that, if I would shun them, I must sit still in shame and grief: and, if I disregard them, it is odds that I fall into the hands of villains. But see how miserable I am. Sometimes it seems preferable that I should receive some damage however bitter from Caesar's party, that people may see I am hated by the tyrant. But, if the voyage for which I hoped were open to me, certainly, as you wish and advise, I should have done something to justify delay. But I am watched with extraordinary care and even Curio is suspect. So I must make a bold move or use craft. If a bold move, I need good weather: but, if craft, should there be any faux pas, you see how disgraced I should be. I am carried away by circumstances and must not be afraid of a bold course.
[152] Iliad xvii, 112, "But what is past though grieved we will let be."
De Caelio saepe mecum agito nec, si quid habuero tale, dimittam. Hispanias spero firmas esse. Massiliensium factum cum ipsum per se luculentum est, tum mihi argumento est recte esse in Hispaniis. Minus enim auderent, si aliter esset, et scirent; nam et vicini et diligentes sunt. Odium autem recte animadvertis significatum in theatro. Legiones etiam has, quas in Italia assumpsit, alienissimas esse video. Sed tamen nihil inimicius quam sibi ipse. Illud recte times, ne ruat. Si desperarit, certe ruet. Quo magis efficiendum aliquid est, fortuna velim meliore, animo Caeliano. Sed primum quidque. Quod qualecumque erit, continuo scies. Nos iuveni, ut rogas, suppeditabimus et Peloponnesum ipsam sustinebimus. Est enim indoles, modo aliquod hoc sit ἦθος ΑΚΙΜΟΑΟΝ.[153] Quod si adhuc nullum est, esse tamen potest, aut ἀρετὴ non est διδακτόν, quod mihi persuaderi non potest.
[153] The text here is corrupt and no convincing emendation has been suggested.
XIII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano Non. Mai. a. 705
Epistula tua gratissima fuit meae Tulliae et me hercule mihi. Semper speculam aliquam adferunt tuae litterae. Scribes igitur, ac, si quid ad spem poteris, ne dimiseris. Tu Antoni leones pertimescas cave. Nihil est illo homine iucundius. Attende πρᾶξιν πολιτικοῦ.
I often reflect about Caelius; and if I have such an opportunity, I will not let it go. I hope Spain is safe. The action of the Massilians is praiseworthy in itself, and is a proof to me that things are going well in Spain. They would have been less bold, if it were otherwise, and they should know, for they live near and are watchful. You are right to remark the expression of popular feeling in the theatre. Even the legions which Caesar got in Italy seem to me to be very disloyal to him. However he is his own worst enemy. You are right to fear that he may run amuck. Assuredly he will, if he loses hope. That is all the more inducement for me to do something in the spirit of Caelius, and I hope with better luck. But everything in due course; and, whatever it be, I will inform you forthwith. I will do all for young Quintus that is necessary, and will undertake the task not only of Arcadia but of the whole Peloponnese.[154] He is able, if only he had character. However, if he has none so far, he may get it, or virtue is not teachable, and that I can never believe.
[154] Cf. x, 5.
XIII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 7, B.C. 49
Your letter was very pleasing to my daughter and of course to me, for your correspondence always brings a gleam of hope. So please write, and, if you can be hopeful, don't fail to be so. Don't be too much afraid of Antony's lions.[155] He is a jovial fellow. Just hear
[155] Plutarch and Pliny state that after Pharsalia Antony had a chariot drawn by lions: but from this passage it appears that the story was current earlier.
Evocavit litteris e municipiis decem primos et IIII viros. Venerunt ad villam eius mane. Primum dormiit ad h. III, deinde, cum esset nuntiatum venisse Neapolitanos et Cumanos (his enim est Caesar iratus), postridie redire iussit; lavari se velle et περὶ κοιλιολυσίαν γίνεσθαι. Hoc here effecit. Hodie autem in Aenariam transire constituit. Exsulibus reditum pollicetur.
Sed haec omittamus, de nobis aliquid agamas. A Q. Axio accepi litteras. De Tirone gratum. Vettienum diligo. Vestorio reddidi. Servius pr. Nonas Maias Menturnis mansisse dicitur, hodie in Liternino mansurus apud C. Marcellum. Cras igitur nos mature videbit mihique dabit argumentum ad te epistulae. Iam enim non reperio, quod tibi scribam. Illud admiror, quod Antonius ad me ne nuntium quidem, cum praesertim me valde observarit. Videlicet aliquid atrocius de me imperatum est. Coram negare mihi non vult, quod ego nec rogaturus eram nec, si impetrassem, crediturus. Nos tamen aliquid excogitabimus. Tu, quaeso, si quid in Hispaniis. Iam enim poterit audiri, et omnes ita exspectant, ut, si recte fuerit, nihil negotii futurum putent. Ego autem nec retentis iis confectam rem puto, neque amissis desperatam. Silium et Ocellam et ceteros credo retardatos. Te quoque a Curtio impediri video. Etsi, ut opinor, habes ἔκπλουν.[156]
[156] ἔκπλουν Baiter: εκιταονον MSS.
how he plays the statesman. He summoned by letter ten leading men and the board of four from the municipal towns. They came to his country house in the morning. First he slept till nine. Then, when he heard the men had come from Naples and Cumae (for Caesar is angry with them), he bade them return on the next day, saying that he wished to take a bath and a laxative. This he did yesterday. But to-day he has arranged to cross to Aenaria. He is promising the exiles[157] that they shall return.
[157] Banished under Pompey's law de ambitu in 52 B.C.
But let us pass over this and talk about ourselves. I got a letter from Q. Axius. As for Tiro, thanks. I like Vettienus. I have repaid Vestorius. Servius is said to have stopped at Menturnae on the 6th of May. To-day he will stop with C. Marcellus in his villa at Liternum. To-morrow early he will see me, and will give me a subject for a letter to you. Just now I can find nothing to write. I am much astonished that Antony has not even sent a messenger to me, especially when he has paid me much attention. I suppose he has some more truculent order about me. He does not wish to refuse me to my face, but I was not going to ask the favour, nor, if I had got it, should I have believed him. However I will think out some plan. Let me know if anything has happened in Spain; for now there is time for news to have come, and everybody awaits it with the idea, that, if all go well there, there will be no more trouble. But I do not think the business is over, if Spain be kept, nor yet hopeless, if it be lost. Silius and Ocella and the rest I suppose are detained. I see that you too are hindered by Curtius, though I think you have a passport.
XIV
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano VIII Id. Mai. a. 705
O vitam miseram, maiusque malum tam diu timere, quam est illud ipsum, quod timetur! Servius, ut antea scripsi, cum venisset Nonis Maiis, postridie ad me mane venit. Ne diutius te teneam, nullius consilii exitum invenimus. Numquam vidi hominem perturbatiorem metu; neque hercule quicquam timebat, quod non esset timendum; illum sibi iratum, hunc non amicum; horribilem utriusque victoriam, cum propter alterius crudelitatem, alterius audaciam tum propter utriusque difficultatem pecuniariam; quae erui nusquam nisi ex privatorum bonis posset. Atque haec ita multis cum lacrimis loquebatur, ut ego mirarer eas tam diuturna miseria non exaruisse. Mihi quidem etiam lippitudo haec, propter quam non ipse ad te scribo, sine ulla lacrima est, sed saepius odiosa est propter vigilias. Quam ob rem, quicquid habes ad consolandum, collige et illa scribe, non ex doctrina neque ex libris (nam id quidem domi est, sed nescio quo modo imbecillior est medicina quam morbus), haec potius conquire de Hispaniis, de Massilia; quae quidem satis bella Servius adfert; qui etiam de duabus legionibus luculentos auctores esse dicebat. Haec igitur, si habebis, et talia. Et quidem paucis diebus aliquid audiri necesse est.
Sed redeo ad Servium. Distulimus omnino sermonem in posterum, sed tardus ad exeundum "multo se
XIV
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 8, B.C. 49
What a wretched life this is! and to be so long afraid is more wretched than the very thing one fears! Servius, as I told you before, came on the 7th of May and on the next morning visited me. Not to detain you longer, we could not see our way to a plan. Never have I seen a man more upset with fear; and upon my soul he feared nothing that did not deserve to be feared. He pointed out that Pompey was angry with him, that Caesar was not friendly, that the victory of either would be terrible, both because Pompey was cruel and Caesar daring, and because of their money difficulties, which could only be got rid of by an attack on private property. He bewailed all this with such a flood of tears, that I was surprised they had not dried up in all that long time of misery. My own eyes do not shed one single tear, though this inflammation prevents me from writing to you; but it is often tiresome by keeping me awake. So please collect all the consolation you can and send it to me—not from philosophy or books—I have plenty of that, but I find somehow that the cure is too weak for the disease. Search rather for any news about Spain or Massilia. What Servius says about them is quite satisfactory, and he also tells me there is excellent authority for the story of the two legions. News of this kind then send me, if you get it, and such like topics. Anyhow in a few days something must be heard.
But to return to Servius. We deferred all our conversation to the next day: but he is reluctant to leave Italy, declaring he would much rather die in
in suo lectulo malle, quicquid foret." Odiosus scrupulus de filii militia Brundisina. Unum illud firmissime adseverabat, si damnati restituerentur, in exsilium se iturum. Nos autem ad haec "et id ipsum certo fore, et, quae iam fierent, non esse leviora," multaque colligebamus. Verum ea non animum eius augebant, sed timorem, ut iam celandus magis de nostro consilio quam adhibendus videretur. Quare in hoc non multum est. Nos a te admoniti de Caelio cogitabimus.
XV
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano IV Id. Mai. a. 705
Servius cum esset apud me, Cephalio cum tuis litteris VI Idus venit; quae nobis magnam spem attulerunt meliorum rerum de octo cohortibus. Etenim eae quoque, quae in his locis sunt, labare dicuntur. Eodem die Funisulanus a te attulit litteras, in quibus erat confirmatius idem illud. Ei de suo negotio respondi cumulate cum omni tua gratia. Adhuc non satis faciebat; debet autem mihi multos nummos nec habetur locuples. Nunc ait se daturum; cui expensum tulerit, morari; tabellariis, si apud te esset qua satis fecisset, dares. Quantum sit, Eros Philotimi tibi dicet. Sed ad maiora redeamus.
Quod optas, Caelianum illud maturescit. Itaque torqueor, utrum ventum exspectem. Vexillo opus est; convolabunt. Quod suades, ut palam, prorsus adsentior, itaque me profecturum puto. Tuas tamen
his bed whatever happens. He has unpleasant scruples about his son's military service at Brundisium. On one point he is quite firm, that, if the condemned are restored, he will go into exile. I for my part replied "that will certainly happen, and what is happening is equally disagreeable," and I quoted many examples. My examples however did not increase his courage but his fear: so that it appears I must rather conceal from him my design than invite him to share it. He is not to be depended on. By your advice I will consider about Caelius.
XV
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 12, B.C. 49
While Servius was with me, Cephalio came with your letter of the 10th, which gave me great hope of better news about the eight cohorts. For even the cohorts which are here are said to be wavering. On the same day Funisulanus brought me a letter from you, corroborating the same news. I gave him a full reply about his business, explaining all your kindness. Hitherto he has not been satisfactory; and he owes me a large sum and is not considered safe. Now he says that he will settle; but that a debtor of his was slow in paying, and that you are to pay the money by your letter-carriers, if that debtor has deposited it with you. The amount Philotimus' man Eros will tell you. But to return to more important matters.
That Caelian plan you favour is coming to a head: so I am worried whether to await a favourable wind. It is a standard we want, and men will flock to it. With your advice, that I should set sail openly, I entirely agree: and so I think I will set out. However
interim litteras exspecto. Servi consilio nihil, expeditur. Omnes captiones in omni sententia occurrunt. Unum C. Marcellum cognovi timidiorem; quem consulem fuisse paenitet. Ὢ πολλῆς ἀγεννείας! qui etiam Antonium confirmasse dicitur, ut me impediret, quo ipse, credo, honestius. Antonius autem VI Idus Capuam profectus est. Ad me misit, se pudore deterritum ad me non venisse, quod me sibi suscensere putaret. Ibitur igitur et ita quidem, ut censes, nisi cuius gravioris personae suscipiendae spes erit ante oblata. Sed vix erit tam cito. Allienus autem praetor putabat aliquem, si ego non, ex collegis suis. Quivis licet, dum modo aliquis.
De sorore laudo. De Quinto puero datur opera; spero esse meliora. De Quinto fratre scito eum non mediocriter laborare de versura, sed adhuc nihil a L. Egnatio expressit. Axius de duodecim milibus pudens! Saepe enim ad me scripsit, ut Gallio, quantum is vellet, darem. Quodsi non scripsisset, possemne aliter? Et quidem saepe sum pollicitus, sed tantum voluit cito. Me vero adiuvarent his in angustiis. Sed di istos! Verum alias. Te a quartana liberatum gaudeo itemque Piliam. Ego, dum panis et cetera in navem parantur, excurro in Pompeianum. Vettieno velim gratias, quod studiosus sit; si quemquam nanctus eris, qui perferat, litteras des, antequam discedimus.
I await a letter from you meanwhile. Servius' advice has not been helpful. All sorts of bars meet us in every opinion he expresses. Only one man, C. Marcellus, have I known to be more timid, and he is sorry he was ever a consul. What a lowborn spirit! He is said even to have strengthened Antony's resolution to prevent my departure: so that his own conduct I suppose may appear more honourable. Antony started for Capua on the 10th, sending word that shame prevented his visiting me, because he thought I was annoyed with him. So I shall go, and openly as you advise, unless hope of playing a more important part shall offer. But that can scarcely occur so soon. Allienus the praetor thought one of his colleagues would be chosen,[158] if I were not. Let it be anyone they like so long as it is some one.
[158] As peace delegate.
As to your sister, I approve. As for young Quintus, I am doing my best, and I hope things are better. As for my brother Quintus, you must know that he is taking extraordinary pains to borrow money to settle his debt; but so far has squeezed nothing out of L. Egnatius. Axius is modest about the £100[159]: for he often requested in his letters that I should pay Gallius as much as he wanted. Even if he had not written, could I have helped it? I have often promised indeed; but he wanted so much at once. They should have helped me rather in my difficulties, confound them. But I will write of this another time. I am glad you are rid of your ague, and Pilia too. While bread and provisions are being put on board, I am going off to my estate at Pompeii. Please thank Vettienus for his trouble. If you can find a messenger, give me a letter before I leave.
[159] 12,000 sesterces.
XVI
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano prid. Id. Mai. a. 705
Commodum ad te dederam litteras de pluribus rebus, cum ad me bene mane Dionysius fuit. Cui quidem ego non modo placabilem me praebuissem, sed totum remisissem, si venisset, qua mente tu ad me scripseras. Erat enim sic in tuis litteris, quas Arpini acceperam, eum venturum facturumque, quod ego vellem. Ego volebam autem vel cupiebam potius esse eum nobiscum. Quod quia plane, cum in Formianum venisset, praeciderat, asperius ad te de eo scribere solebam. At ille perpauca locutus hanc summam habuit orationis, ut sibi ignoscerem; se rebus suis impeditum nobiscum ire non posse. Pauca respondi, magnum accepi dolorem, intellexi fortunam ab eo nostram despectam esse. Quid quaeris? (fortasse miraberis) in maximis horum temporum doloribus hunc mihi scito esse. Velim, ut tibi amicus sit. Hoc cum tibi opto, opto, ut beatus sis; erit enim tam diu.
Consilium nostrum spero vacuum periculo fore. Nam et dissimulavimus, et, ut opinor, non acerrime adservabimur. Navigatio modo sit, qualem opto, cetera, quae quidem consilio provideri poterunt, cavebuntur. Tu, dum adsumus, non modo quae scies audierisve, sed etiam quae futura providebis, scribas velim.
Cato, qui Siciliam tenere nullo negotio potuit (et, si tenuisset, omnes boni ad eum se contulissent), Syracusis profectus est ante diem VIII K. Mai., ut ad me
XVI
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 14, B.C. 49
I had just sent a letter to you about a number of matters, when very early in the morning Dionysius came to my house. I should not only have been civil to him, I should have pardoned him altogether, if he had come in the spirit you described. For the letter I got at Arpinum said that he was coming and would do whatever I wanted; and I wanted or rather longed that he should be with me. It was because he had flatly refused to do so, when he came to my villa at Formiae, I used to write to you about him rather bitterly. However, after the first greeting, he said, to put it shortly, that I must excuse him and that business prevented his going with me. I said little in reply, but I was greatly hurt, for I understood that he looked down on my fortunes. You may be astonished, but you must know that this is one of the greatest sorrows I have suffered in this crisis. I hope that he may be a friend to you. When I wish that, I wish you prosperity, for just so long he will be your friend.
My plan, I hope, will be free from risk, for I have kept the matter a secret, and, as I think, I shall not be watched very keenly. Only let the voyage be as good as I want, and all precautions that foresight can suggest will be taken. While I am here, please write not only anything you know or hear, but even what you foresee.
Cato, who could have held Sicily without any trouble—and, if he had held it, all loyalists would have flocked to him—sailed from Syracuse on the
Curio scripsit. Utinam, quod aiunt, Cotta Sardiniam teneat! est enim rumor. O, si id fuerit, turpem Catonem!
Ego, ut minuerem suspicionem profectionis aut cogitationis meae, profectus sum in Pompeianum a. d. IIII Idus, ut ibi essem, dum, quae ad navigandum opus essent, pararentur. Cum ad villam venissem, relatum[160] est ad me centuriones trium cohortium, quae Pompeiis sunt, me velle postridie convenire. Haec mecum Ninnius noster, velle eos mihi se et oppidum tradere. At ego abii postridie a villa ante lucem, ut me omnino illi ne viderent. Quid enim erat in tribus cohortibus? quid, si plures? quo apparatu? Cogitavi eadem illa Caeliana, quae legi in epistula tua, quam accepi, simul et in Cumanum veni eodem die, et simul fieri poterat, ut temptaremur. Omnem igitur suspicionem sustuli. Sed, dum redeo, Hortensius venerat et ad Terentiam salutatum deverterat. Sermone erat usus honorifico erga me. Iam eum, ut puto, videbo; misit enim puerum se ad me venire. Hoc quidem melius quam collega noster Antonius, cuius inter lictores lectica mima portatur.
[160] relatum Müller: ventum MSS.
Tu, quoniam quartana cares et novum morbum removisti, sed etiam gravedinem, teque vegetum nobis in Graecia siste et litterarum aliquid interea.
23rd of April, as Curio has informed me by letter. I only hope Cotta may hold Sardinia, as they say, for there is a rumour to that effect. If that happens, what a reflection of Cato!
To lessen suspicion of my journey and intentions I started for my place at Pompeii on the 12th of May to stay there while the necessary provisions were made for my voyage. When I arrived, I was told the centurions of the three cohorts here wished to visit me the next day. That was what my friend Ninnius said—that they wished to hand over themselves and the town to me. But I left the next morning before daybreak, so that they should not see me at all: for what was the use of three cohorts, or more indeed? And what was our equipment? I pondered too over the matter of Caelius when I read it in your letter, which I received on the same day as I arrived at Cumae. It was possible too that it was a mere ruse, so I did away with all grounds of suspicion. But, while I was on my way back, Hortensius came, and turned out of his way to greet Terentia, and he had spoken of me with much courtesy. I think I shall see him soon, for he has sent a servant to announce his coming. This is better behaviour than that of my fellow augur Antony, who carries an actress in a sedan among his lictors.
As you have lost your quartan fever and have not only thrown off your new malady but also your cold, you must present yourself before me sound and fit in Greece. Meanwhile drop me a line.
XVII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano XVII K. Iun. a. 705
Pr. Idus Hortensius ad me venit seripta epistula. Vellem cetera eius! quam in me incredibilem ἐκτένειαν! Qua quidem cogito uti. Deinde Serapion cum epistula tua. Quam priusquam aperuissem, dixi ei te ad me de eo scripsisse antea, ut feceras. Deinde epistula lecta[161] cumulatissime cetera. Et hercule hominem probo; nam et doctum et probum existimo; quin etiam navi eius me et ipso convectore usurum puto.
[161] lecta Manutius: scripta MSS.
Crebro refricat lippitudo non illa quidem perodiosa, sed tamen quae impediat scriptionem meam. Valetudinem tuam iam confirmatam esse et a vetere morbo et a novis temptationibus gaudeo.
Ocellam vellem haberemus; videntur enim esse haec paulo faciliora futura. Nunc quidem aequinoctium nos moratur, quod valde perturbatum erat. Id si transierit,[162] utinam idem maneat Hortensius! si quidem, ut adhuc erat, liberalius esse nihil potest.
[162] transierit Ziehen: cras erit MSS.: ἀκραὲς erit Bosius.
De diplomate admiraris quasi nescio cuius te flagitii insimularim. Negas enim te reperire, qui mihi id in mentem venerit. Ego autem, quia scripseras te proficisci cogitare (etenim audieram nemini aliter licere), eo te habere censebam, et quia pueris diploma sumpseras. Habes causam opinionis meae. Et tamen
XVII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 16, B.C. 49
On the 14th of May Hortensius came to me, just as I had written my letter. I wish his conduct were always as it is now.[163] You would never believe how gushing he was, and I intend to take advantage of it. Then Serapion came with a letter from you. Before I opened it, I told him that you had written to me about him before, as you had done. Then when I had read the letter, I told him the rest in full detail, and upon my word I like the man; for I think him to be learned and upright. Moreover I think I will use his ship and make him my fellow-passenger.
[163] Or "I wish he would always confine himself to writing." But the passage may be corrupt.
Inflammation of the eyes often breaks out again, not indeed very troublesome, but enough to prevent my writing. That your health has recovered from your old complaint and your new attacks I am glad.
I wish I had Ocella here: for it looks as if things are going to be rather easier. Just now the equinox is delaying me. It has been very boisterous. When that is over, I only hope Hortensius may keep to the same mind. So far he could not be more generous.
You wonder about the passport I mentioned, as if I hinted you were guilty of some crime. You say you can't discover how it came into my mind. For my part since you wrote that you meditated leaving, and I had heard that a passport was indispensable, I decided you must have one: and also because you had taken out a passport for the boys. That was the reason for my opinion, but please write and tell me
velim scire, quid cogites, in primisque, si quid etiam nunc novi est.
XVII K. Iun.
XVIII
CICERO ATTICO SAL.
Scr. in Cumano XIV aut XIII K. Iun. a. 705
Tullia mea peperit XIIII K. Iun. puerum ἑπταμηνιαῖον. Quod εὐτόκησεν, gaudeo; quod quidem est natum, perimbecillum est. Me mirificae tranquillitates adhuc tenuerunt atque maiori impedimento fuerunt quam custodiae, quibus adservor. Nam illa Hortensiana omnia fuere infantia. Ita fiet. Homo nequissimus a Salvio liberto depravatus est. Itaque posthac non scribam ad te, quid facturus sim, sed quid fecerim; omnes enim Κωρυκαῖοι videntur subauscultare, quae loquor.
Tu tamen, si quid de Hispaniis sive quid aliud, perge, quaeso, scribere nec meas litteras exspectaris, nisi cum, quo opto, pervenerimus, aut si quid ex cursu. Sed hoc quoque timide scribo. Ita omnia tarda adhuc et spissa. Ut male posuimus initia, sic cetera sequuntur.
Formias nunc sequimur; eodem nos fortasse Furiae persequentur. Ex Balbi autem sermone, quem tecum habuit, non probamus de Melita. Dubitas igitur, quin nos in hostium numero habeat? Scripsi equidem Balbo te ad me et de benevolentia scripsisse et de
what you intend, and especially if there is any news.
May 16.
XVIII
CICERO TO ATTICUS, GREETING.
Cumae, May 19 or 20, B.C. 49
My daughter was confined on the 19th of May: a boy, a seven months' child. I am glad she had a safe delivery. As for the thing that has been born, it is a very poor specimen. So far I have been detained by an astonishing calm, which has been a greater hindrance than the watch kept on me. For all that gush of Hortensius proved child's talk. So it will be found. The villain has been corrupted by Salvius his freeman. Accordingly hereafter I shall write to you, not what I intend to do but what I have done. For every eavesdropper[164] seems to be listening to what I say.
[164] The people of Corycus in Pamphylia spied on merchant vessels and betrayed them to pirates. Hence their name became a proverbial term for spies and eavesdroppers.
However if you have any news about Spain or any other topic, please write, but do not count on a letter from me, till I have reached the desired haven; or possibly I may write something on the voyage. But even this much I write in fear. How sluggishly and draggingly everything has gone! The foundation was badly laid and the rest is of a piece.
Just now I am going to Formiae; perhaps there too the Furies will follow me. However according to Balbus' conversation with you my idea of going to Malta does not win approval. Can you doubt then that Caesar regards me as an enemy? To be sure I have written to Balbus telling him that you had informed me of his kindness and his suspicion. I
suspicione. Egi gratias; de altero ei me purga. Ecquem tu hominem infeliciorem? Non loquor plura, ne te quoque excruciem. Ipse conficior venisse tempus, cum iam nec fortiter nec prudenter quicquam facere possim.
thanked him for his kindness: as regards the suspicion, clear me. Is there a more unlucky man living? I won't say more for fear of hurting you too. I am tortured by the thought that the time has come when I can no longer act either with boldness or discretion.