CHAPTER XIX
Boston’s help for the Infirmary stimulates New York, sometimes to unconscious humor—Meeting with Fanny Kemble—Dr. Zakrzewska obtains entrée into the variety of social “circles” then existing—The Cary sisters—Women of the Press—The educational circle—The esthetic group—The so-called Free Lovers—The artistic circle—Mrs. Z.’s social circle—The philanthropic circle—The Fourierites—The demonstrating Spiritualists—Woman’s Rights meetings—Dr. Zakrzewska and Horace Greeley opposing speakers in discussion on “Divorce”—Dr. Emily urges Dr. Blackwell to give up New York for London, opposition there being lessened by Florence Nightingale’s work—The Fair finally materializes and is successful—Dr. Emily Blackwell returns from Europe, making the third physician working upon the Infirmary plans. (Twenty-seven years of age: 1856.)
Meanwhile, the letters from Dr. Emily Blackwell, who was completing her medical studies in England, urged Dr. Blackwell to give up her life in America and come to England as a more promising field for developing the introduction of medical women into practice.
But Dr. Blackwell held fast to the fact that in America the first Woman’s Medical College (Philadelphia) had been in existence for several years, and she felt that it would be unwise to desert this beginning.
The struggles of this little college were so great because all aids to foster its growth were so hard to acquire; and also because many a student withdrew from the school after a few months of attendance upon learning what great obstacles were to be overcome in acquiring medical knowledge and how great was the social prejudice against female medical students. Hence, only the brave, the courageous, the determined, and the financially equipped women could remain and weather the stormy days of their student life.
Thus it was felt best that the realization of the New York Infirmary should be carried on; and Dr. Emily promised to interest her English friends to contribute to the English table. Dr. Blackwell’s friends and well-wishers began with great zeal to arrange sewing circles, while new friends were acquired who were willing to assist in the charity even if not inclined to the “reformers,” as we were called.
An old lady, Mrs. T——, residing on Fifth Avenue, was one of the newly acquired friends. She also wished to assist us by introducing us into her circle and she invited me to her reception days which were held from eleven to one—the fashionable hours at that time.
The difficulty was not in my name, for it was very fashionable at that time to introduce exiles and their friends into society, but what should be my title? She said that I was too young to be called “Madame”; and “Miss” would not sound well with my unpronounceable name while “Doctor”—oh! no! she could not call me that; and “Doctress” was not reputable. So, what?
Then, what would I talk about? “Hospitals,” of course. Yes, of course—and then she added, tolerantly, “Well, if you must talk on hospitals, do not mention women doctors but say for the purpose of ‘training nurses,’ which is now so fashionable in England through Miss Nightingale’s training at Kaiserswerth, Germany.”
Another lady invited me to dine with her. And she remarked, “I shall be all alone and we can talk your plans over without being disturbed or ridiculed by my husband and sons. You see,” she added, “my daughters are married and we hold by our fortune a position which would equal that of a duchess in your country, so we must be very careful not to offend good taste by inviting reformers without a thorough knowledge of their plans.” When I replied that my ancestry was about as good as her money as we dated our name back to 911, she was quite relieved and asked permission to tell this fact to her friends in order to explain her interest in me.
Then there was the little incident which I never can forget, so ludicrous did it appear to me, when Dr. Blackwell and I called upon Fanny Kemble, and she most tragically exclaimed, “Women DOCTORS! NEVER!”
During the summer months, Dr. Blackwell gained a number of new acquaintances who, being inclined towards the elevation of woman’s education, were sent to us by Dr. Harriot K. Hunt, of Boston. Among these were Miss Elizabeth Peabody and Miss Anne Whitney (the latter then known simply as a poet, now also as a sculptor) who interested themselves deeply in our projects. And through them we became acquainted with Mrs. Angelina Grimké Weld and her sister, Miss Sarah Grimké, and Mrs. Spring, all these being our neighbors across the Hudson, residing at Eagleswood. Other valuable aid came through Mrs. Lucy Stone and Mrs. Antoinette Brown Blackwell who, sharing the home with us, formed strong links with all the liberally inclined members of the anti-slavery movement. My friend, Mary L. Booth, became of great assistance to me, and I joined an association of women, called the Alpha, of which she was secretary.
There was a quiet revolution going on in all strata of social life. The present generation can form only an approximate idea of the spirit of the time in those years. New England transcendentalism had influenced all intelligent people throughout the country. It was a real Sturm und Drang period which pervaded men and women alike. Abolitionism was at its height. Everywhere, the pros and cons of the means to abolish slavery was the topic of conversations and discussions. And transcendentalism was interpreted into all kinds of isms because nobody could define its meaning. Thus it happened that there arose a great many circles and cliques in which one or more theories were nurtured.
One of the pleasantest of these circles was that formed by the sisters, Alice and Phœbe Cary, who kept open house every Sunday evening from eight to eleven o’clock. These were not the fashionable, senseless receptions of the present day, but real social gatherings where everybody came regularly and often took up the conversation where it was left unfinished the week before, or brought the new events of the week for discussion. All was informal; no sitting down, the little parlor often holding fifty or sixty guests, many representing the press or politics; no refreshments except a pitcher of cold water and glasses in the hall. Eminent men were always the center at these gatherings—the names of Greeley, Colfax, Ripley, Garrison, and a host of similar leaders were never wanting.
This description answers very well for all the other circles. The charm of all these gatherings consisted in the fact that they were not receptions but places where everybody came regularly when disengaged otherwise, or while in New York if not resident. No refreshments were served but a liberal supply of ice water, with plenty of glasses, stood in a little room or in the hall, while conversation or discussion or music or even dancing formed the attraction.
One circle was the promoter of women in the press, and this was headed by Mrs. Elizabeth Oakes Smith. She held open house on Thursday evenings, and here all the then-known press women, musicians and artists met in the most liberal spirit.
In the educational field were Mrs. Kirtland and Miss Haynes, who each had the best school for young ladies but to whose houses invitations were needed.
The esthetic group, representing those who aspired to the cultivation of the fine arts, and including exiles of renown, gathered at evening receptions under the leadership of Mrs. X. In her elegant parlors every one who was introduced by those already accepted was welcomed and entertained with music, conversation and card playing. Mr. and Mrs. George Hildreth could be found there week after week, as well as the then most-renowned musicians and actors.
Another very prominent circle was that of the Free Lovers, then so called. Mrs. Grosvenor was called by Mr. Alcott, whom I first met at her evenings, the “high priestess of free love.” This circle was most frequented by all persons who represented any ism. Mr. Alcott held his conversations often in this house. Messrs. Ripley, Greeley, Albert Brisbane; the pianist, Gottschalk; the advocate of Spiritualism, Andrew Jackson Davis; the communist, Stephen Pearl Andrews; representatives of legislatures and of Congress; as well as literary women and artists—all could here find people who were intellectually congenial to them in this field of speculation.
A purely artistic circle gathered at Miss Freeman’s studio apartments. She being then the most prominent illustrator of books, drew around her delightful aspirants in art and music. In her parlor, I met Miss Charlotte Cushman, who kindly patronized me and my internes and students after the New York Infirmary was established, by sending us tickets to her performances.
An important social circle gathered around Mrs. Z., the leader of taste and fashion, who entertained in her elegant and spacious parlors. Here also whist playing was cultivated under the leadership of Mr. George Hildreth, who patiently taught me whenever I could join his table.
The philanthropic circle was the smallest. Its leaders were Mr. Charles Brace of “Five Points” fame, Mr. Peter Cooper, Miss Elizabeth P. Peabody, and the Sedgwick family, of which Miss Catherine Sedgwick was the most prominent member. I attended meetings of this circle through Dr. Elizabeth Blackwell.
Another important and active influence was exerted by the admirers of the socialist Fourier. A movement was initiated similar to the Brook Farm movement, in Boston. Mr. Marcus Spring had erected a phalanstery, in Eagleswood, New Jersey, where ideal housekeeping, education, the cultivation of literature and high-grade amusement were the objects pursued. To this phase of social life, I was introduced through Mrs. Theodore Weld, Miss Sarah Grimké, Miss Elizabeth P. Peabody and Mrs. Horace Mann. Menial labor was abhorred, in contradistinction to Brook Farm ideas; the culture of mind and of body was preëminent, and Mr. Theodore Weld was the High Priest.
A strange center was that of the demonstrating Spiritualists, who were held together by Mrs. Cleveland and her sister, Mrs. Horace Greeley. Here, as it happened, abolitionists appeared most prominently, and general invitations to the house were extended only during the “Convention Week” in May. The Fox Sisters have been said to perform wonderful feats on such occasions. I never witnessed any, as each time that I happened to be present disturbing elements were said to prevent the materialization of the spirits. Soon after this, the Fox Sisters joined the Roman Catholic Church and were said to have confessed that all their performances were well-arranged deceptions.
Thus I became acquainted with the leading minds who agitated the public, and who helped to advance our plans for the establishment of a hospital where women physicians could prove their capacity and skill by attending sick women and children.
Unfortunately, Dr. Blackwell was not in general harmony with these different phases of social development; on the contrary, she often felt repelled by the theories advanced by them. And I was not only interested and instructed in the various ways of freedom of thought and speech, but also greatly amused by the frequent extravaganzas and oddities of persons and occurrences, especially at the Anti-Slavery meetings and, later, at the so-called Woman’s Rights conventions.
For instance, on one occasion Mrs. Ernestine L. Rose was speaking, when a mob of men was determined to quiet her by making unseemly noises. A handsome, delicate little woman, she stood silent on the platform listening to the roaring of these men. All at once they became quiet, impressed by her statuelike dignity, and one of the disturbers called out, “Go on, old steamboat!” to which she calmly replied, “As soon as you have done.” She then spoke for a whole hour without further interruption.
Similar interruptions can be related by Lucy Stone and Antoinette Brown Blackwell. Both of these ladies at that time formed part of Dr. Elizabeth Blackwell’s family, in New York, which was presided over by the most genial, kind and efficient old lady, Mrs. Blackwell, the mother.
A great misfortune for us was that the components of these circles, while not exactly poor, were certainly not rich. All the assistance which they could give us was in good will and good wishes. Yet these were of great help after all, for they opened channels which led us to the well-to-do. These latter were influenced by motives of philanthropy and also by the general awakening of the spirit which began to demand nobler fields of action than the providing of mere physical comforts. They also opened the way for us to friends such as Mr. George W. Curtis, Rev. O. B. Frothingham (then in Newark), Rev. Henry Ward Beecher, Drs. McCready, Kissam and Porter, Rev. Mr. Bellows, Rev. Mr. Chapin, Dr. Tuthill (one of the editors of the New York Times) and his wife and sister; Mrs. R. G. Shaw (mother of Col. Robert Shaw), Mrs. Marcus Spring, the Misses Sedgwick, Mrs. Howland and many others, who came to our assistance and turned the social scale somewhat in our favor.
I might here record an experience which I had as a member of what we would now call a “Woman’s Club,” and which was named the “Alpha.” This association was composed of women who were striving for the advancement of women. Its leader and president was Mrs. Lyons, Miss Mary L. Booth was secretary, and Miss Sarah Tuthill was treasurer. Its meetings were held alternately at the houses of Mrs. Lyons and Miss Booth. It also held social gatherings several times during the year, and to these gentlemen were invited and asked to take part in the discussions. Among these latter were Horace Greeley and George Ripley, but there were also all persons well known in literary or professional life.
At one of these latter meetings the divorce question was made the subject for discussion, and Mr. Horace Greeley was appointed to take the negative side and I the affirmative. As I was with and in the spirit of the times in discussing the subject, it was decided by the judges that I had the better of the argument.
Mr. Greeley was so excited and provoked that he said, “Then, Madam, I understand that a man has the right to say to his wife on Sunday morning when he finds that a button is missing on his shirt, ‘Wife, I demand that we get divorced!’”
All were rather confounded by his argument and looked dubiously at me. Fortunately, my wits were previously rather excited, and so I replied:
“Mr. Greeley, the sooner such a man seeks a divorce from his wife, the better for her, because if he considers such a trifle as he mentions a cause for divorce, he is not married in the sense he ought to be.”
This incident he related soon afterward in the Tribune, with the addition of pointing out the danger to which the “thinking” of women will lead. And he markedly ignored me whenever by chance we met afterward.
All these experiences were of great interest and advantage to me personally, and I developed all these opportunities for forwarding my plans and gaining friends, little by little, for the idea of employing women physicians. But the main object at that time was to gain friends for the proposed Fair in December.
As I now look back on that time when a little pin-cushion or mat was presented for this enterprise and think how joyful we were, as we saw in every little gift the desired dollar, or even fifty cents, and then compare that state of affairs with the present, when we calmly announce that ten thousand dollars must be raised by a Fair, I cannot hope to describe the happy emotion which I then felt over the gift of fifty cents.
It is not the size of the gift or the amount of money which it represents which swells our breast with thankfulness and happiness. It is, after all, the sympathy which the gift conveys which makes its value, and this value is greatest when such sympathy is most needed.
Oh! the golden time of Youth and Hope! How little we improve the chances in our later years to assist the young in their aspirations! And thus do we deprive both them and ourselves of that which means true happiness, namely, sympathetic relations between on the one hand, those who keep the world and its interests moving by their aspirations; and, on the other hand, those who have retired, often with disappointment, because of the little they could effect individually.
It is youth and the superior wisdom of the young, no matter whether they have it in reality or only in their imagination, which leads humanity onward toward the millennium. Humanity is, and must remain, young; and no olden times are worthy of being held up as an example.
Meanwhile, letters from Dr. Emily Blackwell, who was continuing her studies in England, came cheeringly with promises of help towards the Fair. But she also continued to urge the abandonment of the work in the United States and its transference to London, where a desire to promote the education of medical women had begun to manifest itself after Miss Florence Nightingale had so successfully shown the necessity of educating nurses in their profession.
One of the great advantages in such transference to England urged upon Dr. Blackwell was that we would not there have to live down or fight the nefarious and criminal practice which was being carried on chiefly in New York City, but also more or less in smaller places, and which by its advertising in the newspapers had created such a strong prejudice against “Doctresses,” as its practitioners were styled.
We were obliged to place the intention of training nurses in the foreground when appealing for sympathy or assistance in our work, in order to get any kind of hearing among the philanthropists, or in sending articles to the newspapers.
Finally, in November, we saw the result of our efforts becoming substantiated in boxes, in baskets, in trunks and in the closets, so that we now were ready to decide upon a locality where we might offer our treasures to the benevolent of New York City.
Dr. Blackwell called a meeting in her parlors of all the ladies who had interested themselves during the summer, and we discussed halls, as well as vestries, which might prove attractive to the public, and a committee was appointed to visit the different places and to seek interviews with those in control of them.
I was, of course, one of the members of the committee, and we decided to go to the places in groups of two or three and to report the result at the end of a week. In less than three days, however, the chairman called a meeting of the committee because of the experiences of the three groups who had spent two days from morning till evening visiting the agents of the different desirable, and even undesirable, locations. Everywhere they had received the same answer, namely, “We don’t want to have anything to do with women doctors or irresponsible ladies wishing to hold a Fair in our place.”
Not the proposition to pay in advance nor the promise that we should not advertise the fact that it was intended to furnish a hospital for female physicians, as they were then called, could soften the hearts of these men, who simply closed all discussion by saying, “It is not our custom to deal with ladies.” Even the kind words of Dr. Bellows could not induce the men of his church to allow us the use of their vestry. What was to be done?
A general meeting was again called, and the husband of one of the committee, Mrs. Haydock, suggested that we hire a large loft in a building, in the business quarters, of which he had control. This was an unfinished room with a bare floor of unplaned boards with numerous knot holes and protruding nails. It had no fixtures for lighting and no ornaments overhead but rough beams and rafters. Another lady of the committee proposed to send her parlor chandeliers to be connected with the gas pipes; while a friend of Dr. Blackwell made a drawing showing how to cover bare, rough walls with evergreens and wreaths. Others loaned rugs for the floor and draperies for the walls, and we used evergreens to conceal the bareness above.
The necessity to have a place at all caused us to accept these propositions and, in spite of three long rough flights of stairs, we advertised our Fair largely and also the motive for holding it, praising its arrangements and enlarging upon its novelty as well as upon its choice goods. We charged ten cents admission and we drew a good attendance for four days, realizing six hundred dollars net profit. And what an immense sum this seemed to us all!