Twentieth Century Culture and Deportment / Or the Lady and Gentleman at Home and Abroad; Containing Rules of Etiquette for All Occasions, Including Calls; Invitations; Parties; Weddings; Receptions; Dinners and Teas; Etiquette of the Street; Public Places, Etc., Etc. Forming a Complete Guide to Self-Culture; the Art of Dressing Well; Conversation; Courtship; Etiquette for Children; Letter-Writing; Artistic Home and Interior Decorations, Etc.

by Maud C. Cooke

A Church Wedding.

A church wedding is more picturesque and solemn than any other form of celebrating the marriage rite and the etiquette of all full-dress affairs of this nature is essentially the same.

The groom drives first to the church, accompanied by his “best man” and enters either vestry or church parlor. The relatives, the mother of the bride and the bridemaids now drive to the church in carriages, closely followed by the carriage of the bride and her father.

By this time it is supposed that the carpet and awning, if it is a city church, are in place, the invited guests assembled, and the bridal procession immediately forms, entering the church and passing up the aisle to the strains of the wedding march. In England a lovely innovation is made on this threadbare custom by having a chorus of boy-voices sing an epithalamium, or wedding ode, during their progress. This custom has found its way here in some ritualistic churches where the vested choir march, two and two, at the head of the bridal procession, singing as they march. Sometimes as high as forty, and even seventy, in number swell the cortège.

The order of progression is as follows: first the ushers, (unless there are choristers to take the lead) who march up the aisle by twos, keeping step with the music, then, if there are child-bridemaids, they follow in the same order. Some brides have two, some four or six of these dainty dots of maids. The children are followed by the grown bridemaids, also two by two. Sometimes children alone fill the place, there being no grown maids. The maids, both children and grown folk, are arranged according to their height and the harmony of color in their gowns.

THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY.

After them comes the bride leaning on the right arm of her father. It sometimes happens that she walks up the aisle alone, and again that she is accompanied by some male relative who is to take a father’s place in giving her away. Occasionally young brothers, mere boys in age, are permitted to assume this touching duty.

At the altar steps the ushers separate and pass to the right and left, the bridemaids also separate in a similar manner, leaving space for the bridal couple. The groom, having come from the vestry, accompanied by the “best man,” should be standing in readiness to advance, take the bride by her right hand and turn to the clergyman, who proceeds with the marriage formula sanctioned by his faith.

At that point in the service where the question is asked, “Who giveth this woman to be married to this man?” the father, or whoever takes his place, should bow, and then in a moment leave the group and seat himself beside the bride’s mother in the front pew at the left.

In a ritualistic church the bride and groom at once kneel before the officiating clergyman, who will signify to them at what point of the service to rise. Hassocks should be provided for the occasion.

The first bridemaid, or maid of honor, takes her stand close to, and slightly back of, the bride, that she may be ready to take her bouquet, if she has one, remove her glove, or, as is the better custom in this day of many-buttoned gloves, to turn back the neatly-ripped glove-finger that the ring may be adjusted, and to hold her bouquet or prayer-book when necessary. In the meantime, it is the “best man” who hands the ring to the clergyman in readiness for use.