ILLUSTRATIONS
["And the only kick they've got, Mawruss," Abe said, "is that President Wilson won't expose his hand, which, if he did, he might just so well throw the game to Germany and be done with it." ]
["I bet yer over half a czar's morning mail already is circulars from casket concerns alone, Abe." ]
["'So,' Mrs. Hoover says, 'you had one of them sixty-cent table-d'hôte lunches to-day again, and now of course you 'ain't got no appetite. How many times did I tell you you shouldn't eat that poison?'" ]
["Perhaps it's because this here Lord George and King George is related maybe," Morris suggested. "I don't think so," Abe replied. "The name is only a quincidence."]
["'Well, if we are such big experts on machine-guns, we should ought to know a whole lot more about machine-guns as Colonel Lewis, and what does that Schlemiel know about machine-guns, anyway?'" ]
["And five minutes after the jury had returned a verdict would be on his way up to the Matteawan Asylum for the Criminal Insane." ]
["Take, for instance, sopranos, and they come in two classes. There is the soprano which hollers murder police and they call her a dramatic soprano. And then again there is the soprano which gargles. That is a coloratura soprano." ]
["For instance, who is it that says whole-wheat bread irritates the lining from the elementry canal? The ignorant man? Oser!" ]