LESSON XXXVII.
How to be Happy.—Child at Home.
1. Every child must have observed how much happier and more beloved some children are than others. There are some children whom you always love to be with. They are happy themselves, and they make you happy.
2. There are others, whose society you always avoid. The very expression of their countenances produces unpleasant feelings. They seem to have no friends.
3. No person can be happy without friends. The heart is formed for love, and cannot be happy without the opportunity of giving and receiving affection.
4. But you cannot receive affection, unless you will also give it. You cannot find others to love you, unless you will also love them. Love is only to be obtained by giving love in return. Hence the importance of cultivating a cheerful and obliging disposition. You cannot be happy without it.
5. I have sometimes heard a girl say, "I know that I am very unpopular at school." Now, this is a plain confession that she is very disobliging and unamiable in her disposition.
6. If your companions do not love you, it is your own fault. They cannot help loving you, if you will be kind and friendly. If you are not loved, it is a good evidence that you do not deserve to be loved. It is true, that a sense of duty may, at times, render it necessary for you to do that which will be displeasing to your companions.
7. But, if it is seen that you have a noble spirit, that you are above selfishness, that you are willing to make sacrifices of your own personal convenience to promote the happiness of your associates, you will never be in want of friends.
8. You must not regard it as your misfortune that others do not love you, but your fault. It is not beauty, it is not wealth, that will give you friends. Your heart must glow with kindness, if you would attract to yourself the esteem and affection of those by whom you are surrounded.
9. You are little aware how much the happiness of your whole life depends upon the cultivation of an affectionate and obliging disposition. If you will adopt the resolution that you will confer favors whenever you have an opportunity, you will certainly be surrounded by ardent friends.
10. Begin upon this principle in childhood, and act upon it through life, and you will make yourself happy, and promote the happiness of all within your influence.
11. You go to school on a cold winter morning. A bright fire is blazing upon the hearth, surrounded with boys struggling to get near it to warm themselves. After you get slightly warmed, another school-mate comes in, suffering with cold. "Here, James," you pleasantly call out to him, "I am almost warm; you may have my place."
12. As you slip aside to allow him to take your place at the fire, will he not feel that you are kind? The worst dispositioned boy in the world cannot help admiring such generosity.
13. And even though he be so ungrateful as to be unwilling to return the favor, you may depend upon it that he will be your friend as far as he is capable of friendship. If you will habitually act upon this principle, you will never want friends.
14. Suppose, some day, you were out with your companions, playing ball. After you had been playing for some time, another boy comes along. He cannot be chosen upon either side, for there is no one to match him. "Henry," you say, "you may take my place a little while, and I will rest."
15. You throw yourself down upon the grass, while Henry, fresh and vigorous, takes your bat and engages in the game. He knows that you gave up to accommodate him; and how can he help liking you for it?
16. The fact is, that neither man nor child can cultivate such a spirit of generosity and kindness, without attracting affection and esteem.
17. Look and see which of your companions have the most friends, and you will find that they are those who have this noble spirit,—who are willing to deny themselves, that they may make their associates happy.
18. This is not peculiar to childhood. It is the same in all periods of life. There is but one way to make friends; and that is, by being friendly to others.
19. Perhaps some child, who reads this, feels conscious of being disliked, and yet desires to have the affection of his companions. You ask me what you shall do. I will tell you.
20. I will give you an infallible rule. Do all in your power to make others happy. Be willing to make sacrifices of your own convenience, that you may promote the happiness of others.
21. This is the way to make friends, and the only way. When you are playing with your brothers and sisters at home, be always ready to give them more than their share of privileges.
22. Manifest an obliging disposition, and they cannot but regard you with affection. In all your intercourse with others, at home or abroad, let these feelings influence you, and you will receive a rich reward.
