DRAMATIS PERSONÆ
King of England.
Lord Percy.
Samles.
King of Scots.
Lord Douglas.
Lord Morton.
Lord Ross.
Bishop of St Andrews.
Lord Eustace.
Sir Bartram.
Sir Cuthbert Anderson.
Ateukin.
Jaques.
A Lawyer.
A Merchant.
A Divine.
Slipper,
Nano, a dwarf,
sons to Bohan.
Andrew.
Purveyor, Herald, Scout, Huntsmen, Soldiers, Revellers, etc.
Dorothea, Queen of Scots.
Countess of Arran.
Ida, her daughter.
Lady Anderson.
Ladies, etc.
Oberon, King of Fairies.
Bohan.
Antics, Fairies, etc.
JAMES THE FOURTH[238]
THE INDUCTION.
Music playing within. Enter after Oberon, King of Fairies, an Antic,[239] who dance about a tomb placed conveniently on the stage; out of which suddenly starts up, as they dance, Bohan, a Scot, attired like a ridstall[240] man, from whom the Antics fly. Oberon remains.
Boh. Ah say, what's thou?
Ober. Thy friend, Bohan.
Boh. What wot I or reck I that? whay, guid man, I reck no friend nor ay reck no foe; als ene to me. Git thee ganging, and trouble not may whayet,[241] or ays gar[242] thee recon me nene of thay friend, by the Mary mass, sall I!
Ober. Why, angry Scot, I visit thee for love; then what moves thee to wrath?
Boh. The de'il a whit reck I thy love; for I know too well that true love took her flight twenty winter sence to heaven, whither till ay can, weel I wot, ay sal ne'er find love: an thou lovest me, leave me to myself. But what were those puppets that hopped and skipped about me year whayle?[243]
Ober. My subjects.
Boh. Thay subjects! whay, art thou a king?
Ober. I am.
Boh. The de'il thou art! whay, thou lookest not so big as the King of Clubs, nor so sharp as the King of Spades, nor so fain as the King a Daymonds: be the mass, ay take thee to be the king of false hearts; therefore I rid[244] thee away, or ayse so curry your kingdom that you's be glad to run to save your life.
Ober. Why, stoical Scot, do what thou darest to me: here is my breast, strike.
Boh. Thou wilt not threap[245] me, this whinyard[246] has gard many better men to lope then thou! [Tries to draw his sword.] But how now! Gos sayds, what, will't not out? Whay, thou witch, thou de'il! Gad's fute, may whinyard!
Ober. Why, pull, man: but what an 'twere out, how then?
Boh. This, then,—thou weart best be gone first; for ay'l so lop thy limbs that thou's go with half a knave's carcass to the de'il.
Ober. Draw it out: now strike, fool, canst thou not?
Boh. Bread ay gad, what de'il is in me? Whay, tell me, thou skipjack, what art thou?
Ober. Nay, first tell me what thou wast from thy birth, what thou hast passed hitherto, why thou dwellest in a tomb and leavest the world; and then I will release thee of these bonds; before, not.
Boh. And not before! then needs must, needs sall. I was born a gentleman of the best blood in all Scotland, except the king. When time brought me to age, and death took my parents, I became a courtier; where, though ay list not praise myself, ay engraved the memory of Bohan on the skin-coat of some of them, and revelled with the proudest.
Ober. But why, living in such reputation, didst thou leave to be a courtier?
Boh. Because my pride was vanity, my expense loss, my reward fair words and large promises, and my hopes spilt; for that after many years' service one outran me; and what the de'il should I then do there? No, no; flattering knaves, that can cog and prate fastest, speed best in the court.
Ober. To what life didst thou then betake thee?
Boh. I then changed the court for the country, and the wars for a wife: but I found the craft of swains more vile than the knavery of courtiers, the charge of children more heavy than servants, and wives' tongues worse than the wars itself; and therefore I gave o'er that, and went to the city to dwell; and there I kept a great house with small cheer, but all was ne'er the near.[247]
Ober. And why?
Boh. Because, in seeking friends, I found table-guests to eat me and my meat, my wife's gossips to bewray the secrets of my heart, kindred to betray the effect of my life: which when I noted,—the court ill, the country worse, and the city worst of all,—in good time my wife died, ay would she had died twenty winter sooner, by the mass! leaving my two sons[248] to the world, and shutting myself into this tomb, where, if I die, I am sure I am safe from wild beasts, but, whilst I live, cannot be free from ill company. Besides, now I am sure, gif all my friends fail me, I sall have a grave of mine own providing. This is all. Now, what art thou?
Ober. Oberon, King of Fairies, that loves thee because thou hatest the world; and, to gratulate thee, I brought these antics to show thee some sport in dancing, which thou hast loved well.
Boh. Ha, ha, ha! thinkest thou those puppets can please me? whay, I have two sons, that with one Scottish jig shall break the necks of thy antics.
Ober. That I would fain see.
Boh. Why, thou shalt.—Ho, boys!
Enter Slipper and Nano.
Haud your clacks,[249] lads; trattle not for thy life, but gather up your legs, and dance me forthwith a jig worth the sight.
Slip. Why, I must talk, an I die for't: wherefore was my tongue made?
Boh. Prattle, an thou darest, one word more, and ais dab this whinyard in thy wemb.
Ober. Be quiet, Bohan. I'll strike him dumb, and his brother too; their talk shall not hinder our jig.—Fall to it; dance, I say, man!
Boh. Dance, Humer, dance, ay rid thee.
[The two dance a jig devised for the nonst.
Now get you to the wide world with more than my father gave me; that's learning enough both kinds, knavery and honesty; and that I gave you, spend at pleasure.
Ober. Nay, for their sport I will give them this gift: to the dwarf I give a quick wit, pretty of body, and awarrant his preferment to a prince's service, where by his wisdom he shall gain more love than common; and to loggerhead your son I give a wandering life, and promise he shall never lack, and avow that, if in all distresses he call upon me, to help him. Now let them go. [Exeunt Slipper and Nano with courtesies.
Boh. Now, king, if thou be a king, I will show thee whay I hate the world by demonstration. In the year fifteen hundred and twenty, was in Scotland a king, over-ruled with parasites, misled by lust, and many circumstances too long to trattle on now, much like our court of Scotland this day. That story have I set down. Gang with me to the gallery, and I'll show thee the same in action by guid fellows of our country-men; and then, when thou see'st that, judge if any wise man would not leave the world if he could.
Ober. That will I see: lead, and I'll follow thee. [Exeunt.
Laus Deo detur in æternum.