CHAPTER XIII
THE CLEAR SENTENCE
Business men like to talk of brevity. They tell you that a talk or a letter must be brief. What they really mean is that the talk or the letter must be concise; that it must state the business clearly in the fewest possible words. Don't omit any essential fact when you write, but don't repeat. If you can express an idea in ten words, don't use twenty. In a later exercise we shall meet the sentence, The size of the crops is always important, and it is especially so to the farmer, and this is because he has to live by the crops. The writer of that sentence was very careless. He had a good idea and thought that, if he kept repeating it, he would make it stronger. Just the reverse is true. The sentence may be expressed in a very few words: The size of the crop is vitally important to the farmer.
If you wish to secure conciseness of expression, be especially careful to avoid joining or completing thoughts by these expressions: and, so, why, that is why, this is the reason, and everything.
In this chapter we shall consider some of the larger faults that should be avoided in sentences.
Exercise 197—Unity of the Sentence
Give the definition of a sentence.
How many thoughts may one sentence express?
What is likely to happen when two thoughts are joined by and? What, then, is the danger in using the compound sentence?
The compound sentence is good to use to express certain ideas, especially contrast; as,
It is not work that kills men; it is worry.
It is not the revolution that destroys the machinery, but the friction [but it is the friction].
The sentences which most clearly and easily give us one thought are the simple and the complex sentences.
Compare the following sentences. Which of them leave one idea in your mind?
The tongue is a sharp-edged tool.
A sharp tongue is the only edged tool that grows keener with constant use.
A sharp tongue is like an edged tool, and it grows keener with constant use.
Exercise 198
The following is wordy. Rewrite it, condensing as much as possible. Use simple and complex sentences rather than compound, expressing in each only one thought.
In the early summer the corn crop frequently seems to be very poor, and so reports begin to circulate that corn will be high in the autumn, but when the autumn really comes, Wall Street, that great center of business life, begins to see that the reports have been greatly exaggerated and that crops really will be very good, and so business begins to pick up. The size of the crop largely settles the volume of the next season's business, because so great a part of the world's business activity is made up of buying and selling the actual potatoes and corn and wheat and cattle or the products made from these, and when the crop is poor there are a great many people concerned, because they will be poor just as the crops are poor, and this applies to the farmer as well as to the dealer.
The size of the crops is always important, and is especially so to the farmer, and this is because he has to live by the crops. A man may be living in the city and working for a salary and begin to see that his work is not supporting him, and if he is an ambitious man, he will change his occupation. This the farmer cannot do because he has made an enormous investment; in the first place, he has invested in his land, and then in his seed and farm implements, and this investment often means all the available money the farmer has, and often it means a mortgage on his farm. He puts the mortgage on his farm in hope of getting a good crop, and when his hope is not realized, he is in trouble, because he may lose his whole farm if he cannot pay the installments of interest due on his mortgage; but then, on the other hand, if we consider the other side of the question, when the crop is large, the situation is altogether different. Even if the farmer has put a mortgage on his farm, he gets enough money from his produce to pay the debt of that mortgage, and he need not worry how he is to live during the next winter.
The town merchants depend on a good crop, because, if the farmer has not a good return from his fields, he will have almost no ready money, and so he cannot buy much clothing or household furnishings. In Iowa, for instance, there is a little town in the center of a corn-raising community, and it is here that the farmers congregate to do their buying, and in this town there is quite a large department store, and it is run by a woman. She does most of her buying in the autumn and she prefers to do it personally, and so she likes to make a trip to New York for the purpose, but she never sets out until she knows that the corn crop is good. And the reason for this is that she knows that it will cost her hundreds of dollars to make the trip East, to stay at a good hotel, and to spend the requisite length of time choosing her purchases at the different wholesale houses, and she knows that if there is no corn crop she will sell very few coats and hats and lace curtains, and it will never pay her to run up her expenses into the hundreds of dollars, but she will buy as best she can from the drummers, and buy only a little, and thus the size of the crop determines how much the farmer can buy, and, therefore, how much the wholesale and retail dealers can sell.
Exercise 199—Subordination in the Sentence
Sentences containing compound predicates may be made more direct in thought if one of the verbs is changed to a participle or an infinitive, because the predicate will then express only one action; as,
1. The carpenter threw down his hammer and walked out of the shop.
2. Throwing down his hammer, the carpenter walked out of the shop.
3. I went downtown and applied for the position.
4. I went downtown to apply for the position.
Change the following sentences so that one action is denoted by the predicate of each:
1. A teamster drove out of the alley east of the theater and swung his horses directly in front of a Madison street car.
2. The tongue struck the front of the car and bored a hole in the fuse box.
3. The fire spread and burned the roof of the car.
4. The half dozen passengers were badly frightened and got out quickly.
5. Several people ran and turned in a fire alarm.
6. In a few minutes the fire engines arrived and began to fight the flames.
7. Crowds came from all directions and silently watched the flames.
8. The people poured out of the theater and cheered the firemen.
9. The half dozen passengers soon recovered and stood on the curbstone in the crowd.
10. The firemen did their work quickly and departed amid the cheers of the crowd.
Exercise 200—Combination of Short Sentences
Sometimes short sentences are bad because two or three of them are needed to express one complete thought. If that is the case, they should be combined, the most important detail being put into the principal clause, and the other details into modifiers, as in the preceding exercise.
Make use of—
1. Adjectives.
2. Adverbs.
3. Participial phrases.
4. Infinitives.
5. Relative pronouns.
6. Subordinate conjunctions.
Below, the first and second sentences together make one thought, which is expressed in the third.
John is a good reporter.
That is why he earns a good salary.
Because John is a good reporter, he earns a good salary.
Combine the sentences of each group below into a single sentence, either simple or complex, omitting as many words as possible but no ideas:
1. We stayed at home for two reasons: first of all, we thought Baltimore might be unpleasantly warm. Then, the other reason was that we thought we ought to economize.
2. In China the wedding takes place at the bridegroom's house. This has been decorated with strips of bright red paper, and they have the word "Hsi" on them. This means "Live in happiness."
3. First in the procession come the standard bearers. They are hired for the occasion. These men have red coats put on over their dirty clothes. The men they hire are usually beggars.
4. Six years ago I went sailing on Lake George with my father. I was ten years old at that time. Two other men went along with us. The boat that we went in belonged to my father and these men.
5. The wind was high and it would come in gusts. This made it hard to sail. It shifted the sails so quickly that it would throw the boat over on one side.
6. Several times the boat leaned over at an angle of forty degrees. This let the water come in on that side. When this happened, we all had to jump to the other side. We did this so that the boat would right itself.
7. The heart is the most important organ in the body. This is because if the heart stops beating, you cannot live. Besides, all the other organs are connected with it. It is something like the main spring in a watch.
8. This is a good machine. And since that's the case, I don't see why it is that it doesn't work as it should.
9. In every business there are many bad debts. Some can be collected and others cannot be. This is because the men who made them were given credit, and they didn't have any money.
10. The night was dark, and there were no stars. The fishermen stood on the shore, and they gazed at the wild sea. A storm had arisen, and they could not go out in their boats.
Exercise 201
As in the preceding exercise, rewrite the following, omitting as many words as possible, but no ideas. Use shorter, simpler expressions wherever possible.
1
Uncle Sam now has an aerial navy, but it's a small one, and foundations of it were recently laid. This was done when contracts were signed for the delivery of three aeroplanes and they are the first aeroplanes that the United States bought. These aeroplanes are of the latest development. They are all capable of rising from land or water. They are able also to land on water or on the deck of a ship, and they can carry at least one passenger and are equipped with wireless outfits. Two of them are Curtis machines and the third is a Wright, and they ranged in price from $2,700 to $5,500.
2
The United States produces more steel than any two European countries, and it is continuing to produce more. Moreover, it has the productive capacity to produce more than any other three or four countries put together. This capacity is being still further increased. At the present time, there is one very important steel company. It is very large, and seems to wish to monopolize the entire iron and steel industry. Even at this time it owns half the principal plants that are now producing steel and iron, and controls half the trade of the entire steel and iron industry, and when such a thing happens, it is a matter of international concern.
3
Condense the following into a single sentence, either simple or complex:
The iron and steel industry is very important, and it includes a great deal. First, the ore has to be mined, and then the work includes everything up to making the finest wire for musical instruments. Or, to put it another way, you can say from smelting the ore to building a battle ship. This is a very interesting occupation and, as said before, very important. There is hardly anything more interesting or important except agriculture.
Exercise 202—Dangling Expressions
Sometimes a sentence is not clear because it contains a participle which does not modify anything in the sentence. A participle is part verb and part adjective. As a verb, it expresses the idea of the verb from which it is derived. As an adjective, it must modify a noun or a pronoun. The important point is that this noun or pronoun must be expressed in the sentence and not lie in the mind of the writer, as it does in the following:
Riding from Saugatuck to Holland last year, the country showed unmistakable signs of lack of rain.
Here the writer means, We saw that the country, etc., but he says that the country rode from Saugatuck to Holland.
Again, an expression may be used which is really an incomplete clause. Do not use such a clause, unless the understood subject is the same as the subject expressed in the independent proposition.
Wrong: When almost exhausted, the camp was reached.
Right: When almost exhausted, we reached the camp.
Recast the following sentences, correcting the dangling expressions:
1. You should not stop studying your lessons until thoroughly prepared.
2. In talking to the postman yesterday, he said that his route had been changed.
3. Owing two months' rent, the foreman laid me off.
4. Before becoming a physician, the law sets a very severe examination.
5. Having eaten our luncheon very hastily, the typewriters were soon clicking merrily again.
6. The difficulty could easily be settled, going about it in the right way.
7. Although determined to get my money, the task was harder than I had expected.
8. Having installed an adding machine, our office work could be done in half the time.
9. On entering the car, the first thing that caught my attention was the sign at the end.
10. Silk should be washed with warm water and a mild soap, being careful not to rub it.
11. The house was redecorated, making it clean and homelike.
12. The book should be carefully studied, reviewing each chapter after it is read.
13. Going to work this morning, an accident happened.
14. Having entered college, Mr. Brown watched his son's progress with pride.
15. Soon after abandoning the boat, it sank.
16. They say he will be lame, caused by a fall on the ice while skating.
17. While trying to break the half mile record, his back was injured.
18. Many people object to football, because in tackling the boys' hearts are weakened.
19. He did not wish to take up an extra study, thus lessening his chance of being eligible for athletics.
20. While a child, my father often told me stories of Indian days.
21. Absorbed all day in superintending his work, in the evening the newspaper brought him political news enough to fill the hours between dinner and bed-time.
22. Discussing the happenings in the ward with an old crony, his daughter would often sit near him listening.
23. He is failing in his work, caused by his laziness.
24. Although a good tonic, I did not gain weight while taking it.
25. In the new telephone, upon lifting the receiver, a ticking sound is heard.
26. Leaving the window open when she went to lunch, of course the papers were disarranged on her return.
27. Dictionaries must be returned to the desk after using.
Exercise 203—Pronouns with Uncertain Antecedents
Sometimes the meaning of a sentence is not clear because the pronouns have uncertain antecedents.
1. Sometimes a pronoun may refer to either of two antecedents; as,
Wrong: He gave his brother John the umbrella and then he left.
Right: He gave the umbrella to his brother John, who then left.
2. Sometimes the sentence must be entirely recast and a direct quotation used before the pronouns can be made clear; as,
Wrong: Tom told his father that his suit case was lost.
Right: a. Tom said, "Father, your suit case is lost."
b. Tom said, "Father, my suit case is lost."
3. Sometimes the pronoun refers to a word that has not been expressed or to an idea. In that case, the antecedent must be supplied; as,
Wrong: If any one wishes to contribute to the cause, let him send it in the enclosed envelope.
Right: If any one wishes to contribute to the cause, let him send his contribution in the enclosed envelope.
Wrong: I wouldn't wear mittens. Nobody does that nowadays.
Right: I wouldn't wear mittens. Nobody wears them nowadays.
4. A sentence containing an indefinite they or it is corrected thus:
Wrong: Don't they have street cars where you live?
Right: Are there no street cars where you live?
Recast the following:
1. She asked her mother if she could go, and she said she thought she ought to stay at home.
2. John told James he was sure he did not know the office that he meant.
3. George told his father his watch had stopped.
4. The manager asked the clerk to bring his book.
5. A light touch is important in a typewriter, because it makes it easy to write upon it.
6. The size of the crops is important to the farmers, because they have to live by them.
7. They decided to reorganize the company, which is always a difficult task.
8. They went into the hands of a receiver, which is an indication that the affairs of the company had been poorly managed.
9. There is a boat on the lake over which there is a pleasant view, in which there is a club for working girls.
10. He stole some money which brought about an investigation.
11. She asked her aunt how old she was.
12. John is famous for telling anecdotes, and he got it by remembering every story he reads.
13. The sleighing party last night was a success, which is not always the case.
14. He told a lie, which is a bad thing to do.
15. They engaged a gardener, which doubled their monthly expenses.
16. Why don't you get some of that new fur trimming for your blue dress?
17. They had an accident on the street car this morning.
18. In the newspaper it said that the lecture would begin at 8:15.
19. They don't find iron in Illinois, do they?
20. Do they have the original paintings in our art gallery?
21. It says "Closed" on that door.
22. It doesn't mention a bank draft in this book.
23. They have a great many foreigners in New York City.
24. John accompanied his brother to the city where he bought a typewriter.
25. I had expected to take the 9:30 train, but I couldn't do it.
26. Going up to the horse he put a lump of sugar into his mouth.
27. In letter writing one should always be exact and arrange them in the customary form.
28. Those hooks are not rust-proof because the back of my dress is stained with it.
29. The telephone is a great convenience to all. They are now used in almost every house.
30. As we came down the road, it sounded like a train, which, as we approached, grew louder and louder.
Exercise 204—Misplaced Modifiers
Sometimes a sentence is not clear because a modifier does not stand close to the word it modifies.
Wrong: I can't even do the first problem.
Right: I can't do even the first problem.
Change the order of words in the following sentences, placing each modifier as closely as possible to the word which it modifies. Some of the sentences are incorrect because they contain split infinitives. (See [Exercise 92].)
1. I only waited for him about ten minutes.
2. She stood at the window, trying to close it with a troubled face.
3. The city is supplied with water from cold springs which flow nearly a hundred million gallons of the purest liquid that ever burst from the earth, daily.
4. The famous S. F. ice cream is made in this factory containing fifty per cent pure cream.
5. A man should not be allowed to cast a vote, who cannot read and write.
6. After taking the medicine for a short time, the appetite is improved, and a desire is created for food, that has not existed before.
7. In real value, this magazine towers head and shoulders over all others to the woman who is in charge of her home.
8. There are pages of fashion news and embroidery hints and news articles of the day that will appeal to the husband and father as the others do to the wife and daughter as well as departments for the children.
9. The number of the sewing machine is 37A with a drop head.
10. They neither are gentle nor well-mannered.
11. I only heard about the trouble yesterday.
12. He left the same station at which, thirty years before, he had arrived very humbly, in his own special car.
13. He urged his brother to buy a home in his letter.
14. The lighting system has been developed to a really remarkable degree of perfection for the trains.
15. The dynamo is so arranged that when the train is standing still or only traveling twenty miles an hour, the lamps are lighted from a storage battery.
16. The batteries must be large enough during the run to carry the entire lighting load.
17. Please send me 6 Dining Tables No. 46 that extend to ten feet as soon as possible.
18. Large trees grow on each side of the house which is a rambling affair shutting out the light.
19. They decided to give a bonus to the one doing the best work, amounting to fifty dollars.
20. We had almost got to the corner before we saw the fire.
21. I don't ever remember having seen so big a fire.
22. Remember to thoroughly oil the machine.
23. Do you need to in any way alter the machine?
24. If we expect to completely fill the order to-day, we need more help.
Exercise 205—Omission of Necessary Words
Sometimes a sentence is not clear because a word has been omitted that is necessary to the sense; as,
Wrong: The two officers that they elected are the president and secretary.
Right: The two officers that they elected are the president and the secretary.
Wrong: His writing is as good or better than yours.
Right: His writing is as good as or better than yours.
Wrong: The library is where we go to read.
Right: The library is the place where we go to read.
State the difference between the following typewriter ribbons:
1. A red and blue and black ribbon.
2. A red and a blue and black ribbon.
3. A red and blue and a black ribbon.
4. A red and a blue and a black ribbon.
Supply the omitted part in each of the following:
1. I always have and I'm sure I always shall be considerate of others' feelings.
2. They have a stenographer and bookkeeper, who are kept busy all day.
3. I believe he has already or will soon begin the work.
4. The cushions of the rocker are much softer than the armchair.
5. The arrangement of your flat is much more convenient than our house.
6. The number of shelves in your sideboard is just the same as our china closet.
7. I think the articles you ordered will arrive as soon or sooner than you expect.
8. She is as tall or taller than you.
9. When your message arrived, I had already or at least had decided to begin cutting the goods.
10. It may not be better but it is fully as good as the other article.
11. I think you cook fully as well if not better than your sister.
12. His poems hold a place in our hearts second only to the Bible.
13. Your idea is as good if not better than mine.
14. We decided to make the change both for the sake of health and economy.
15. You will find the armchair fully as comfortable, if not more so, than the rocker.
16. The river is where we had the most fun.
17. I know you better than Mary.
18. She went to the park but I didn't care to.
19. We didn't object to the scheme as much as you.
20. A conservatory is where there are all kinds of flowers.
Exercise 206—Shift in Construction
Sometimes the meaning of the sentence is obscure because there has been a shift in construction. Do not change subject, person, tense, or any grammatical form without a good reason. Remember that and is a coördinate conjunction. If there is an adjective before and, there must be an adjective after it. If a clause precedes, a clause must follow. In other words, and joins two members of exactly the same structure. And may not join one word and a phrase, nor may it join a prepositional and a participial phrase. Both members must be alike. In the following extract, parallel constructions are used correctly. Be able to tell what kinds of elements are used and how they are parallel.
To eat your cake and keep it too; to wear a gown with the air of originality and distinction, and keep a full purse; to have your house display taste and refinement, and be praised as an economical housewife; to dress your children daintily, and save money for their education—use ABC transfer patterns. By their aid you can make an inexpensive waist look like a French blouse, have table linen of unrivaled elegance, and dress your babies in the most approved style. These patterns cost,—some ten, some fifteen cents. They cover the entire field of dress,—waists, tunics, panels, infants' clothes, underwear, men's apparel, and neckwear; and of household articles,—towels, table-linen, and pillow tops.
Recast the following sentences, correcting the shift of construction in each:
1. In the large department stores every clerk is to report on her way to lunch and coming back.
2. When one hears a cry of "Fire," your first thought is to run.
3. He seemed fond of his work and to have skill in doing it quickly.
4. I decided on taking the trip and to keep my expenses within fifty dollars if possible.
5. X Y Z Cleaner is good for softening water and other household uses.
6. Because of the rise in the price of meats and owing to the fact that grocers charge more for butter and eggs, people find it hard to live.
7. The office is well-heated and with plenty of light.
8. The crowds began to watch the fire and cheering loudly.
9. I heard the opera last year and have gone again this year.
10. It was wonderful to see how fast they worked and their accuracy.
11. I can't decide whether to take up stenography or if bookkeeping is better.
12. He taught us the principles of letter writing, and somewhat of advertising was taken up.
13. Hoping that the work progressed, and unless a landslide occurred, the Americans expected to remove 5,000,000 cubic yards each year.
14. The study of the earth has always been stimulated by two fundamental passions of humanity—a desire for wealth and because of their curiosity.
15. He insists on our taking the trip and to go without further delay.
16. In reviewing, it is well to go over each part of the course carefully, and you should make a note of every point which you do not understand, and let each ask those questions which he himself cannot answer.
17. Mr. Fitzmorris is a man of great technical skill and who has handled the situation capably.
18. It will cost her hundreds of dollars to make the trip East and spending the requisite length of time choosing her purchases at the different wholesale houses.
19. He had assumed control of the office, planned the advertising, and the finances were also directed by him.
20. We have decided to go on the excursion to the Capitol and at the same time visiting Uncle John.
Exercise 207
What prevents clearness in the following?
1. The Federal Government began an investigation into fire conditions in Europe in 1907, through our consuls.
2. It cost $2.39 a year for fire in the United States between 1901 and 1910, for every man, woman, and child, and Germany does not even pay nineteen cents.
3. The number of our fires is increasing, which is worse.
4. In ten years our population has increased 73 per cent and 134 per cent is the increase in fires.
5. Having considered the details, the conclusion is easily drawn that fire is a disgrace.
6. He only gets to the office at ten o'clock.
7. Having settled the plan of attack, the rest was simple.
8. The manager warned him not to make the mistake again and adding that mistakes are costly.
9. To keep flannels from shrinking, wash in the following way, and you will find it very satisfactory.
10. To open a fruit jar run a knife under the edge and it comes off easily.
11. I didn't even finish half the questions.
12. Electric lights are economical, clean, and give more light than gas.
13. You should buy your suit now, both for the sake of economy and style.
14. If in doubt as to the best word, a book of synonyms should be consulted.
15. The comma fault is where, two principal clauses are run together without a coördinate conjunction.
Rewrite the following so that it will be correct, concise, and clear:
The Europeans were anxious for trade with the East, for they were dependent upon them for spices and luxuries. The three routes were through the Mediterranean Sea, over the Suez Peninsula, down the Red Sea, and across to India. Another was through the Mediterranean and then through Arabia. The other was from the Mediterranean and then through the Black Sea and then by land to India. It became necessary to seek a new route because the Turks held Constantinople, and all vessels had to pass through the Mediterranean, and the Turks held this by pirates. The first explorers were working under the leadership of the King of Portugal, and they solved the problem by going around Africa and then to the Indies, but this was too long, and so explorers tried other ways, and the result was the discovery of America.
CHAPTER XIV
THE PARAGRAPH
The sentences developing each of the divisions of a composition make one paragraph. A paragraph, therefore, is the treatment of one of the natural divisions of a subject. The length depends on the topic to be treated. Two cautions may be given:
1. Do not write paragraphs containing only one sentence. Such paragraphs do not represent divisions of the subject. They are simply statements which have not been expanded as they deserve, or they are sentences that should be placed with the preceding or succeeding sentences in order to make a good paragraph. Some business men in their letters and advertisements use the one-sentence paragraph too frequently to concentrate the attention of the reader. A writer divides his composition into paragraphs in order to aid the reader to follow the thoughts he is presenting. When the reader sees the indentation that indicates a new paragraph, he thinks that the writer has said all that he intends to say on the topic in hand and now intends to open a new topic. It is confusing to find that the new paragraph is simply another sentence on the same topic as the preceding paragraph. Notice the jerky effect of the following extract from a letter:
We are sending you a copy of our latest catalogue, which gives illustrations and prices of all our stock.
The illustrations are all made from actual photographs and are faithful in representing the shoe described.
Bear Brand Shoes are shipped in special fiber cases, thus lessening freight bills and eliminating the annoyance of shortage claims because they cannot be opened without immediate detection.
Errors of any kind should be reported without delay.
Imperfect or damaged goods must be returned for our inspection; otherwise no allowance will be made.
2. Do not go to the other extreme, writing paragraphs of great length. Much depends, of course, on the matter to be treated, but, as a rule, in a student's theme a paragraph should be not longer than one page. If one of the divisions of your subject is necessarily long, subdivide it, allowing a paragraph to treat each of the subdivisions.
Whether it is to be long or short, a paragraph must treat but one topic; from the first sentence to the last, it should be the development of one idea. Moreover, this topic must be revealed to the reader in no unmistakable way. Sometimes the subject is so simple that the topic may easily be gathered from the details given, but usually it is well to have one sentence that in a brief or general way states the topic. This is called the topic sentence. It may be at or near the beginning; in this case the rest of the paragraph defines or illustrates what it states. It may, however, be found at almost any point in the paragraph, not infrequently acting as a sentence of conclusion, summing up the details that have been presented.
A paragraph that begins with a topic sentence sometimes ends with a sentence of conclusion. The first sentence states the topic, the following sentences explain or illustrate it, and the last sentence summarizes or otherwise indicates that the topic has been completed. This form has been called the hammock paragraph, because it has a solid "post" at each end with a mass of details "swinging" between. It is a good form to use in writing paragraphs on given subjects, when each paragraph is to stand alone, complete in itself, not forming part of a longer composition. The practice of writing such paragraphs induces clear, forceful thinking.
Exercise 208
Study the following paragraphs for—
1. Topic sentence, if there is one.
2. Development of the topic.
3. Sentence of conclusion, if there is one.
1
The problem in many large firms is how to develop office efficiency to the highest possible degree. In this respect the monthly examination scheme has been found a great success. The examination consists of a list of questions about merchandise and business procedure. The questions are given out on the last Saturday of the month, and the answers are returned for criticism on the following Wednesday. The employees are told that they may consult as many authorities as they wish, but each man must write his own paper. A poor percentage in three of these tests usually means dismissal. Thus the inefficient are dropped, and the ambitious who have studied are recognized. The vice-president of one concern that uses this system says that it is a strong reminder to his men that they must make themselves worthy of the organization. Besides maintaining an even standard of efficiency, the plan has resulted in developing a number of valuable executives, whose latent powers were brought out by the rigidness of the tests.
2
Every month the department head in one big eastern concern, watch in hand, times a large force of typists individually, testing how rapidly they can write a letter of 200 words from their shorthand notes. Rapidity, punctuation, spelling, and neatness are carefully recorded. This plan has had a desirable influence in bringing stenographers up to grade in their daily work, because a good examination mark is reduced one-half by careless daily work, and a poor examination mark correspondingly raised by excellent daily work. When both examination average and daily average are excellent, the stenographer's salary is increased; when both are below good, the stenographer is dismissed. In this way the standard of stenographic work is kept high.
3
In his effort to succeed many a young business man overlooks the detail of business courtesy. He does not realize the value that a buyer places upon that commodity. The more experienced man, however, knows that courtesy does more to hold a buyer than do bargain sales. In our large cities merchants have incurred great expense to fit up rest rooms where customers may spend an idle hour, write letters on stationery that is provided, and read the latest magazines. In the rural districts, where such luxuries are often impossible, the merchant provides chairs for his customers and a place for stationing their teams. The country merchant, however, can often accomplish his object more quickly than the city dealer by spending an hour gossiping with his customers. He recognizes the fact that buyers are flattered when the proprietor himself takes the time to say a few words to them. He knows just as well as his city competitor does, that if a buyer feels at home in his store, sales are practically guaranteed.
4
The rural landscape of Norway, on the long easterly slope that leads up to the watershed among the mountains on the western coast, is not unlike that of Vermont or New Hampshire. The railway from Christiania to the Randsfjord carried us through a hilly country of scattered farms and villages. Wood played a prominent part in the scenery. There were dark stretches of forest on the hilltops and in the valleys; rivers filled with floating logs; sawmills beside the waterfalls; wooden farmhouses painted white; and rail-fences around the fields. The people seemed sturdy, prosperous, independent. They had the familiar habit of coming down to the station to see the train arrive and depart. We might have fancied ourselves on a journey through the Connecticut valley if it had not been for the soft sing-song of the Norwegian speech and the uniform politeness of the railway officials.
—Van Dyke: Fisherman's Luck.
5
The plan of the Spectator must be allowed to be both original and eminently happy. Every valuable essay in the series may be read with pleasure separately; yet the five or six hundred essays form a whole, and a whole which has the interest of a novel. It must be remembered, too, that at that time no novel, giving a lively and powerful picture of the common life and manners of England, had appeared. Richardson was working as a compositor. Fielding was robbing birds' nests. Smollett was not yet born. The narrative, therefore, which connects together the Spectator's essays gave to our ancestors their first taste of an exquisite and untried pleasure. That narrative was, indeed, constructed with no art or labor. The events were such events as occur every day. Sir Roger comes up to town to see Eugenio, as the worthy baronet always calls Prince Eugene, goes with the Spectator on the water to Spring Gardens, walks among the tombs in the Abbey, and is frightened by the Mohawks, but conquers his apprehension so far as to go to the theater when the "Distressed Mother" is acted. The Spectator pays a visit in the summer to Coverley Hall, is charmed with the old house, the old butler, and the old chaplain, eats a jack caught by Will Wimble, rides to the assizes, and hears a point of law discussed by Tom Touchy. At last a letter from the honest butler brings to the club the news that Sir Roger is dead. Will Honeycomb marries and reforms at sixty. The club breaks up, and the Spectator resigns his functions. Such events can hardly be said to form a plot; yet they are related with such truth, such grace, such wit, such humor, such pathos, such knowledge of the human heart, such knowledge of the ways of the world that they charm us on the hundredth perusal. We have not the least doubt that if Addison had written a novel on an extensive plan, it would have been superior to any that we possess. As it is, he is entitled to be considered not only as the greatest of the English essayists, but as the forerunner of the great English novelists.
—Macaulay: Essay on Addison.
Exercise 209
Prepare a paragraph developing each of the following topic sentences:
1. The kitchen was a cheerful place. (Tell all the details that will explain the word cheerful.)
2. In the kitchen the preparations for the feast went on merrily. (Give the details that will help one get the picture.)
3. Examinations are helpful to the student. (In what ways are they helpful? If possible, use examples to illustrate the point.)
4. Winter is more enjoyable than summer. (Contrast the pleasures of the one with those of the other, showing that those of winter are more enjoyable.)
5. Riding a motorcycle is apt to make a boy reckless. (Develop by using examples.)
6. A man must like his work if he is to succeed in it.
7. Farm lands vary in price.
8. The farmer feeds the world.
9. Every department store should have regular fire drills.
10. Every sale ought to be an advertisement.
Paragraph the following so that the paragraphs will represent the divisions in thought. If there are any topic sentences, underline them.
1
I have often noticed that every one has his own individual small economies, careful habits of saving fractions of pennies in some one peculiar direction, any disturbance of which annoys him more than spending shillings or pounds on some real extravagance. An old gentleman of my acquaintance, who took the intelligence of the failure of a Joint Stock Bank, in which some of his money was invested, with a stoical mildness, worried his family all through a long summer's day because one of them had torn (instead of cutting) out the written leaves of his now useless bankbook. Of course, the corresponding pages at the other end came out as well, and this little unnecessary waste of paper (his private economy) chafed him more than all the loss of his money. Envelopes fretted his soul terribly when they came in. The only way in which he could reconcile himself to such a waste of his cherished article was by patiently turning inside out all that were sent to him, and so making them serve again. Even now, though tamed by age, I see him casting wistful glances at his daughters when they send a whole inside of a half-sheet of note paper, with the three lines of acceptance to an invitation written on only one of the sides. I am not above owning that I have this human weakness myself. String is my foible. My pockets get full of little hanks of it, picked up and twisted together, ready for uses that never come. I am seriously annoyed if any one cuts a string of a parcel instead of patiently and faithfully undoing it fold by fold. How people can bring themselves to use India-rubber bands, which are a sort of deification of string, as lightly as they do I cannot imagine. To me an India-rubber band is a precious treasure. I have one which is not new—one that I picked up off the floor nearly five years ago. I have really tried to use it, but my heart failed me, and I could not commit the extravagance. Small pieces of butter grieve others. They cannot attend to conversation because of the annoyance occasioned by the habit which some people have of invariably taking more butter than they want. Have you ever seen the anxious look (almost mesmeric) which such persons fix on the article? They would feel it a relief if they might bury it out of their sight by popping it into their own mouths and swallowing it down; and they are really made happy if the person on whose plate it lies unused suddenly breaks off a piece of toast (which he does not want at all) and eats up his butter. They think that this is not waste. Now, Miss Matty Jenkins was chary of candles: We had many devices to use as few as possible. In the winter afternoons she would sit knitting for two or three hours—she could do this in the dark or by firelight—and when I asked if I might not ring for candles to finish stitching my wristbands, she told me to "keep blind man's holiday." They were usually brought in with tea, but we burnt only one at a time. As we lived in constant preparation for a friend who might come in any evening (but who never did), it required some contrivance to keep our two candles of the same length, ready to be lighted, and to look as if we burnt two always. The candles took it in turns; and then, whatever we might be talking of or doing, Miss Matty kept her eyes habitually fixed upon the candle, ready to jump up and extinguish it and light the other before they had become too uneven in length to be restored to equality in the course of the evening.
—Adapted from Mrs. Gaskell's Cranford.
2
Dear Madam:
We are sorry to say that we have no more house coats No. SP62 in size 38 at $4.50. As we advertised, SP62 is not a regular stock number, but represents a collection of $5, $6, and $7.50 coats remaining after the holiday sales and reduced to insure their being sold before spring. At the opening of the sale there were only a few coats in size 38, and they were sold almost at once. In our catalogue, pages 68 to 71 inclusive, you will find descriptions of all our stock house coats. On page 68 you will see No. 450HC, our regular $4.50 coat. If you would like us to send you one of these in size 38, we shall forward it to you at once. However, if you would like a $5, $6, or $7.50 coat, you will, no doubt, send us the difference in price on receipt of this letter. Of course, the more expensive garments are made of better materials, but all our coats show the same excellent workmanship. The best way for you to get the exact shade of trimming that you wish is to send us a sample of the goods that you would like to match. We assure you that we shall take all possible care to send you the proper color.
Yours truly,
Exercise 211
Paragraphs may be developed in different ways. For example, if you were going to write on the process of making a layer cake, you would explain in detail the different ingredients in the mixture, the proportion of each, and the steps in the process before the product could be sold as a layer cake.
By the use of explanatory details develop the following:
1. Making a kite.
2. Making a baseball.
3. Making fudge.
4. How to play checkers.
5. The manufacture of soap (or any article in a grocery).
6. The manufacture of a tin can.
7. The manufacture of pins.
8. Every man must have an ambition.
9. Why I intend to enter business.
10. The greatest modern invention.
By the use of examples to illustrate your point develop the following:
1. Electricity is making housework easy and pleasant.
2. Many sons of poor parents have won great wealth.
3. The wireless apparatus has saved many lives.
4. A boy can show that he is a good citizen.
5. Young Americans have little respect for authority.
By the use of comparison and contrast develop the following:
1. Improvements in modern lighting systems.
2. Improvements in modern heating systems.
3. Improvements in modern means of locomotion.
4. Two kinds of work, pleasure, or study.
5. Why I intend to have a business of my own.
6. The study that I like best.
By explaining cause and effect develop the following:
1. The advantages of public gymnasiums.
2. The success of loose leaf devices.
3. The objections to football.
Exercise 212
Develop the following into paragraphs; in each case be able to show what method or methods you have employed:
1. A man who cannot read and write English should not be allowed to vote.
2. Postal savings banks inspire the savings habit.
3. Women—the mothers of children—should vote.
4. Women should not vote because they do not read the newspaper.
5. The effect of school slang is bad.
6. I wish I had seen the coronation of George V. Every fairy story I had ever read would suddenly have become real.
7. Canada would gain by reciprocity with the United States.
8. The United States would gain by reciprocity with Canada.
9. Our forests should be preserved.
10. The waste of lumber by forest fires results from carelessness.
11. The waste of lumber in cutting railroad ties is too great.
12. The rotation of crops enriches the soil.
13. Apples are more easily gathered than cherries.
14. Efforts should be made to keep the birds in our city parks.
15. Every boy should learn a trade.
16. Peddlers should not be allowed to call their wares.
17. Great crowds gathered in the city during aviation week (or any celebration).
18. The electric toaster is good for hurry-up breakfasts.
19. Ironing with an electric iron is more convenient than with the old-fashioned kind.
20. The wireless apparatus makes sea voyages safer than before.
21. A mixed diet is best.
22. Cats should be exterminated because they spread disease.
23. The parcel post will decrease the profits of the express companies.
24. A good book is opened with expectation and closed with profit.
25. Merchants should charge for delivering purchases.
26. The object of the Child Welfare Exhibit is to promote the best interests of children.
27. One of the best enactments of our time is the Child Labor Law.
Exercise 213—Smooth Connection
We may as well confess at the beginning that smooth connection between sentences and paragraphs is a hard thing to learn. Primarily, it depends on clear thinking. In Exercise 135 we saw that the idea of one sentence must grow out of the idea of the preceding one. It is the same with paragraphs. The thought must develop gradually from one to the next. Each paragraph, we know, represents a unit within the larger unit of the composition; each represents a division of thought. Not infrequently the thought of one division differs considerably from the thought of the next. The tying together of such units is sometimes hard. It may be done in one of the following ways:
1. By repeating at the beginning of the new paragraph or sentence part of the preceding paragraph or sentence.
2. By using pronouns to refer to what has gone before.
3. By using connecting links, sometimes called transition words because they indicate the transition from one division to the next. Besides those mentioned in [Exercise 135], we may use a numeral connection, as, in the first place, in the second place; or an expression much like a numeral, as, furthermore, in the next place; or an expression showing that an adverse idea is to be presented, as, on the other hand, however, in spite of this, nevertheless. But whatever you do, choose the right link, especially if you use such a one as possibly, probably, perhaps, certainly, surely. Use the one that expresses your idea exactly. Have none rather than the wrong one.
In the following the first and second paragraphs are connected according to (1) above; the second and third are connected according to (3) above.
There comes to every prosperous man a time when he wishes to know the best way of securing a steady income from his accumulated savings without the burden of responsibility of managing some property in order to gain his income. The merchant may not wish to put back into the business all the earnings he gets from it, and yet he wishes to prepare for his old age. The farmer may wish to give up active work, but he realizes how soon his broad acres may deteriorate through soil-robbery when he rents his property "on shares." With such a problem before him the thoughtful man makes an effort to learn how to act to secure a good income all his life.
One of the first things he learns, if he studies the situation carefully, is that there is a wide difference between an income derived from one's business ability, such as the profit secured from running a store, factory, jobbing house, or farm, and the income which is derived as the result of money "working" by itself. In the first case, a man must of necessity keep up his business responsibilities; in the other, once he has selected a safe investment, practically all he has to do is to collect his income from time to time as it falls due. There is in the latter no depreciation of land, buildings, machinery, or the like; no insurance payments to worry about; no crop failures to consider.
It is evident, then, that if one wishes to put surplus money away—say the proceeds from the sale of a business or a farm—and get a steady income from it without bother or worry, the most important thing to consider is how to go about it to select something which, once purchased, will turn out to be a safe investment.
Exercise 214
In the following paragraphs taken from Robert Louis Stevenson's The Philosophy of Nomenclature, point out all the transition words that join (1) sentence to sentence, and (2) paragraph to paragraph:
To begin, then: the influence of our name makes itself felt from the very cradle. As a schoolboy I remember the pride with which I hailed Robin Hood, Robert Bruce, and Robert le Diable as my name-fellows; and the feeling of sore disappointment that fell on my heart when I found a freebooter or a general who did not share with me a single one of my numerous praenomina. Look at the delight with which two children find they have the same name. They are friends from that moment forth; they have a bond of union stronger than exchange of nuts and sweetmeats. This feeling, I own, wears off in later life. Our names lose their freshness and interest, become trite and indifferent. But this, dear reader, is merely one of the sad effects of those "shades of the prison house" which come gradually betwixt us and nature with advancing years; it affords no weapon against the philosophy of names.
In after life, although we fail to trace its working, that name which careless godfathers lightly applied to your unconscious infancy will have been moulding your character and influencing with irresistible power the whole course of your earthly fortunes. But the last name is no whit less important as a condition of success. Family names, we must recollect, are but inherited nicknames; and if the sobriquet were applicable to the ancestor, it is most likely applicable to the descendant also. You would not expect to find Mr. M'Phun acting as a mute or Mr. M'Lumpha excelling as a professor of dancing. Therefore, in what follows, we shall consider names, independent of whether they are first or last. And to begin with, look what a pull Cromwell had over Pym—the one name full of a resonant imperialism, the other mean, pettifogging, and unheroic to a degree. Who would expect eloquence from Pym—who would read poems by Pym—who would bow to the opinions of Pym? He might have been a dentist, but he should never have aspired to be a statesman. I can only wonder that he succeeded as he did. Pym and Habakkuk stand first upon the roll of men who have triumphed, by sheer force of genius, over the most unfavorable appellations. But even these have suffered; and, had they been more fitly named, the one might have been Lord Protector and the other have shared the laurels with Isaiah. In this matter we must not forget that all our great poets have borne great names. Chaucer, Spenser, Shakespeare, Milton, Pope, Wordsworth, Shelley—what a constellation of lordly words! Not a single commonplace name among them—not a Brown, not a Jones, not a Robinson; they are all names that one would stop and look at on a door-plate. Now, imagine if Pepys had tried to clamber somehow into the enclosure of poetry, what a blot would that name have made upon the list! The thing is impossible. In the first place, a certain natural consciousness that men have would have held him down to the level of his name, would have prevented him from rising above the Pepsine standard, and so haply withheld him altogether from attempting verse. Next, the booksellers would refuse to publish, and the world to read them, on the mere evidence of the fatal appellation. And now, before I close this section, I must say one word as to punnable names, names that stand alone, that have a significance and life apart from him that bears them. These are the bitterest of all. One friend of mine goes bowed and humbled through life under the weight of this misfortune; for it is an awful thing when a man's name is a joke, when he cannot be mentioned without exciting merriment, and when even the intimation of his death bids fair to carry laughter into many a home.
So much for people who are badly named. Now for people who are too well named, who go topheavy from the font, who are baptized into a false position, and who find themselves beginning life eclipsed under the fame of some of the great ones of the past. A man, for instance, called William Shakespeare could never dare to write plays. He is thrown into too humbling an apposition with the author of Hamlet. His own name coming after is such an anti-climax. "The plays of William Shakespeare?" says the reader—"O no! The plays of William Shakespeare Cockerill," and he throws the book aside. In wise pursuance of such views, Mr. John Milton Hengler, who not long since delighted us in this favored town, has never attempted to write an epic, but has chosen a new path and has excelled upon the tight-rope. A marked example of triumph over this is the case of Mr. Dante Gabriel Rosetti. On the face of the matter, I should have advised him to imitate the pleasing modesty of the last-named gentleman, and confine his ambition to the sawdust. But Mr. Rosetti has triumphed. He has even dared to translate from his mighty name-father; and the voice of fame supports him in his boldness.
Exercise 215
Turn back to [Exercise 210], 1. How are the different paragraphs that you have made connected?