ACT V.—SCENE I.
Enter a LAD, a servant of HEGIO.
LAD. May Jupiter and the Deities confound you, Ergasilus, and your stomach, and all Parasites, and every one who henceforth shall give a dinner to Parasites. Destruction and devastation and ruin have just now entered our house. I was afraid that he would be making an attack on me, as though he had been an hungry wolf. And very dreadfully, upon my faith, was I frightened at him; he made such a gnashing with his teeth. On his arrival, the whole larder, with the meat, he turned upside down. He seized a knife, and first cut off the kernels of the neck {1} from three sides. All the pots and cups he broke, except those that held a couple of gallons {2}; of the cook he made enquiry whether the salting pans could be set on the fire to be made hot. All the cellars in the house he has broken into, and has laid the store-closet {3} open. (At the door.) Watch him, servants, if you please; I'll go to meet the old gentleman. I'll tell him to get ready some provisions for his own self, if, indeed, he wishes himself to make use of any. For in this place, as this man, indeed, is managing, either there's nothing already, or very soon there will be nothing. (Exit.
{Footnote 1: The kernels of the neck)—Ver. 920. The "glandia" were the kernels or tonsils of the throat, situate just below the root of the tongue. These portions of the dead pig seem to have been much prized as delicate eating. Judging from the present passage, the whole side of the pig, including the half-head, was salted and dried in one piece: The first thing that the Parasite does, is to cut the kernels from off of three sides, which he has relieved from the punishment of hanging.}
{Footnote 2: A couple of gallons)—Ver. 921. "Modiales." Literally, containing a "modius," which contained sixteen sextarii, something more than a peck of dry-measure English.}
{Footnote 3: The store-closet)—Ver. 923. "Armarium" was to called because it was originally a place for keeping arms. It afterwards came to signify a cupboard in a wall, in which clothes, books, money, and other articles of value, were placed. It was generally in the "atrium," or principal room of the house. In this instance it evidently means the store-closet, distinguished from the larder and the}
SCENE II.—Enter HEGIO, PHILOPOLEMUS, PHILOCRATES, and behind them,
STALAGMUS.
HEG. To Jove and to the Deities I return with reason hearty thanks, inasmuch as they have restored you to your father, and inasmuch as they have delivered me from very many afflictions, which, while I was obliged to be here without you, I was enduring, and inasmuch as I see that that fellow (pointing to STALAGMUS) is in my power, and inasmuch as his word (pointing to PHILOCRATES) has been found true to me.
PHILOP. Enough now have I grieved from my very soul, and enough with care and tears have I disquieted myself. Enough now have I heard of your woes, which at the harbour you told me of. Let us now to this business.
PHIL. What now, since I've kept my word with you, and have caused him to be restored back again to freedom?
HEG. Philocrates, you have acted so that I can never return you thanks enough, in the degree that you merit from myself and my son.
PHILOP. Nay, but you can, father, and you will be able, and I shall be able; and the Divinities will give the means for you to return the kindness he merits to one who deserves so highly of us; as, my father, you are able to do to this person who so especially deserves it.
HEG. What need is there of words? I have no tongue with which to deny whatever you may ask of me.
PHIL. I ask of you to restore to me that servant whom I left here as a surety for myself; who has always proved more faithful to me than to himself; in order that for his services I may be enabled to give him a reward.
HEG. Because you have acted thus kindly, the favour shall be returned, the thing that you ask; both that and anything else that you shall ask of me, you shall obtain. And I would not have you blame me, because in my anger I have treated him harshly.
PHIL. What have you done? HEG. I confined him in fetters at the stone-quarries, when I found out that I had been imposed upon.
PHIL. Ah wretched me! That for my safety misfortunes should have happened to that best of men.
HEG. Now, on this account, you need not give me even one groat of silver {1} for him. Receive him of me without cost that he may be free.
PHIL. On my word, Hegio, you act with kindness; but I entreat that you will order this man to be sent for.
HEG. Certainly. (To the attendants, who immediately obey.) Where are you? Go this instant, and bring Tyndarus here. (To PHILOPOLEMUS and PHILOCRATES.) Do you go in-doors; in the meantime, I wish to enquire of this statue for whipping {2}, what was done with my younger son. Do you go bathe in the meantime.
PHILOP. Philocrates, follow me this way in-doors.
PHIL. I follow you. (They go into the house.)
{Footnote 1: One groat of silver)—Ver. 952. "Libella" was the name of the smallest silver coin with the Romans, being the tenth part of a denarius. Hegio seems to make something of a favour of this, and to give his liberty to Tyndarus in consideration of his punishment; whereas he had originally agreed with Philocrates that, if Philopolemus was liberated, both he and Tyndarus should be set at liberty.}
{Footnote 2: This statue for whipping)—Ver. 956. The same expression occurs in the Pseudolus, I. 911.}
SCENE III.—HEGIO and STALAGMUS.
HEG. Come you, step this way, you worthy fellow, my fine slave.
STAL. What is fitting for me to do, when you, such a man as you are, are speaking false? I was never a handsome or a fine, or a good person, or an honest one, nor shall I ever be; assuredly, don't you be forming any hopes that I shall be honest.
HEG. You easily understand pretty well in what situation your fortunes are. If you shall prove truth-telling, you'll make your lot from bad somewhat better. Speak out, then, correctly and truthfully; but never yet truthfully or correctly have you acted.
STAL. Do you think that I'm ashamed to own it, when you affirm it?
HEG. But I'll make you to be ashamed; for I'll cause you to be blushes all over {1}.
STAL. Heyday—you're threatening stripes, I suppose, to me, quite unaccustomed to them! Away with them, I beg. Tell me what you bring, that you may carry off hence what you are in want of.
HEG. Very fluent indeed. But now I wish this prating to be cut short.
STAL. As you desire, so be it done.
HEG. (to the AUDIENCE). As a boy he was very obedient {2}; now that suits him not. Let's to this business; now give your attention, and inform me upon what I ask. If you tell the truth, you'll make your fortunes somewhat better.
STAL. That's mere trifling. Don't you think that I know what I'm deserving of?
HEG. Still, it is in your power to escape a small portion of it, if not the whole.
STAL. A small portion I shall escape, I know; but much will befall me, and with my deserving it, because I both ran away, and stole your son and sold him.
HEG. To what person? STAL. To Theodoromedes the Polyplusian, in Elis, for six minae.
HEG. O ye immortal Gods! He surely is the father of this person, Philocrates.
STAL. Why, I know him better than yourself, and have seen him more times.
HEG. Supreme Jove, preserve both myself and my son for me. (He goes to the door, and calls aloud.) Philocrates, by your good Genius, I do entreat you, come out, I want you.
{Footnote 1: Be blushes all over)—Ver. 967. He means that he will have him flogged until he is red all over.}
{Footnote 2: Was very obedient)—Ver. 971. An indelicate remark is covertly intended in this passage.}
SCENE IV.—Enter PHILOCRATES, from the house.
PHIL. Hegio, here am I; if you want anything of me, command me.
HEG. He (pointing to STALAGMUS) declares that he sold my son to your father, in Elis, for six minae.
PHIL. (to STALAGMUS). How long since did that happen?
STAL. This is the twentieth year, commencing from it.
PHIL. He is speaking falsely. STAL. Either I or you do. Why, your father gave you the little child, of four years old, to be your own slave.
PHIL. What was his name? If you are speaking the truth, tell me that, then.
STAL. Paegnium, he used to be called; afterwards, you gave him the name of Tyndarus.
PHIL. Why don't I recollect you? STAL. Because it's the fashion for persons to forget, and not to know him whose favour is esteemed as worth nothing.
PHIL. Tell me, was he the person whom you sold to my father, who was given me for my private service?
STAL. It was his son (pointing to HEGIO).
HEG. Is this person now living? STAL. I received the money. I cared nothing about the rest.
HEG. (to PHILOCRATES). What do you say?
PHIL. Why, this very Tyndarus is your son, according, indeed, to the proofs that he mentions. For, a boy himself together with me from boyhood was he brought up, virtuously and modestly, even to manhood.
HEG. I am both unhappy and happy, if you are telling the truth. Unhappy for this reason, because, if he is my son, I have badly treated him. Alas! why have I done both more and less than was his due. That I have ill treated him I am grieved; would that it only could be undone. But see, he's coming here, in a guise not according to his deserts.
SCENE V.—Enter TYNDARUS, in chains, led in by the SERVANTS.
TYND. (to himself). I have seen many of the torments which take place at Acheron {1} often represented in paintings {2}; but most certainly there is no Acheron equal to where I have been in the stone-quarries. There, in fine, is the place where real lassitude must be undergone by the body in laboriousness. For when I came there, just as either jackdaws, or ducks, or quails, are given to Patrician children {3}, for them to play with, so in like fashion, when I arrived, a crow was given {4} me with which to amuse myself. But see, my master's before the door; and lo! my other master has returned from Elis.
HEG. Hail to you, my much wished-for son.
TYND. Ha! how—my son? Aye, aye, I know why you pretend yourself to be the father, and me to be the son; it is because, just as parents do, you give me the means of seeing the light{5}.
PHIL. Hail to you, Tyndarus. TYND. And to you, for whose sake I am enduring these miseries.
PHIL. But now I'll make you in freedom come to wealth. For (pointing to HEGIO) this is your father; (pointing to STALAGMUS) that is the slave who stole you away from here when four years old, and sold you to my father for six minae. He gave you, when a little child, to me a little child, for my own service. He (pointing to STALAGMUS). has made a confession, for we have brought him back from Elis.
TYND. How, where's Hegio's son? PHIL. Look now; in-doors is your own brother.
TYND. How do you say? Have you brought that captive son of his?
PHIL. Why, he's in-doors, I say.
TYND. By my faith, you're done both well and happily.
PHIL. (pointing to HEGIO). Now this is your own father; (pointing to STALAGMUS) this is the thief who stole you when a little child.
TYND. But now, grown up, I shall give him grown up to the executioner for his thieving.
PHIL. He deserves it. TYND. I' faith, I'll deservedly give him the reward that he deserves. (To HEGIO.) But tell me I pray you, are you my father?
HEG, I am he, my son. TYND. Now, at length, I bring it to my recollection, when I reconsider with myself: troth, I do now at last recall to memory that I had heard, as though through a mist, that my father was called Hegio.
HEG. I am he. PHIL. I pray that your son may be lightened of these fetters, and this slave be loaded with them.
HEG. I'm resolved that that shall be the first thing attended to. Let's go in-doors, that the blacksmith may be sent for, in order that I may remove those fetters from you, and give them to him. (They go into the house.)
STAL. To one who has no savings of his own, you'll be rightly doing so {6}.
The COMPANY of PLAYERS coming forward.
Spectators, this play is founded on chaste manners. No wenching is there in this, and no intriguing, no exposure of a child, no cheating out of money; and no young man in love here make his mistress free without his father's knowledge. The Poets find but few Comedies {7} of this kind, where good men might become better. Now, if it pleases you, and if we have pleased you, and have not been tedious, do you give this sign of it: you who wish that chaste manners should have their reward, give us your applause.
{Footnote 1: At Acheron)—Ver. 1003. He here speaks of Acheron, not as one of the rivers of hell, but as the infernal regions themselves.}
{Footnote 2: Represented in paintings)—Ver. 1003 Meursius thinks that the torments of the infernal regions were frequently represented in pictures, for the purpose of deterring men from evil actions, by keeping in view the certain consequences of their bad conduct.}
{Footnote 3: To Patrician children)—Ver. 1007. This passage is confirmed by what Pliny the Younger tells us in his Second Epistle. He says, that on the death of the son of Regulus, his father, in his grief, caused his favourite ponies and dogs, with his nightingales, parrots, and jackdaws, to be consumed on the funeral pile. It would certainly have been a greater compliment to his son's memory had he preserved them, and treated them kindly; but probably he intended to despatch them as playthings for the child in the other world.}
{Footnote 4: A crow was given)—Ver. 1009. "Upupa." He puns upon the twofold meaning of this word, which signified either "a mattock" or a bird called a "hoopoe," according to the context. To preserve the spirit of the pun, a somewhat different translation has been given.}
{Footnote 5: Of seeing the light)—Ver. 1013. He says, "You can only resemble a parent in the fact that you have given me the opportunity of seeing the light of day, by taking me out of the dark stone-quarries."}
{Footnote 6: Be rightly doing so)—Ver. 1033. Stalagmus chooses to take the word "dem" "may give," used by Hegio in its literal sense, and surlily replies, "I have nothing of my own by way of savings, 'peculium,' so I am the very person to whom you ought to give."}
{Footnote 7: Find but few Comedies)—Ver. 1038. He here confesses that he does not pretend to frame the plots of his Plays himself, but that he goes to Greek sources for them; and forgetting that "beggars most not be choosers," he complains that so very few of the Greek Comedies are founded upon chaste manners. Indeed, this Play is justly deemed the most pure and innocent of all the Plays of Plautus; and the Company are quite justified in the commendations which, in their Epilogue, they bestow on it, as the author has carried out the premise which he made in the Prologue (with only four slight exceptions), of presenting them with an immaculate Play.}