Tale First.
There were two men of Gotham, and one of them was going to the market at Nottingham to buy sheep, and the other was coming from the market, and both met together on Nottingham bridge.
“Well met,” said the one to the other.
“Whither are you a-going?” said he that came from Nottingham.
“Marry,” said he that was going thither, “I am going to the market to buy sheep.”
“Buy sheep,” said the other; “and which way will you bring them home?”
“Marry,” said the other, “I will bring them over this bridge.”
“By Robin Hood,” said he that came from Nottingham, “but thou shalt not.”
“By maid Marjoram,” said he that was going thither, “but I will.”
“Thou shalt not,” said the one.
“I will,” said the other.
“Tut here,” said the one, and “Tut there,” said the other. Then they beat their staves against the ground one against the other, as if there had been a hundred sheep betwixt them.
“Hold them there,” said one.
“Beware of the leaping over the bridge of my sheep,” said the other.
“I care not.”
“They shall all come this way,” said the one.
“But they shall not,” said the other.
As they were in contention, another wise man that belonged to Gotham came from the market with a sack of meal upon his horse, and seeing and hearing his neighbours at strife about sheep, and none betwixt them, said he—
“Ah, fools! will you never learn wit? Then help me,” said he that had the meal, “and lay this sack upon my shoulder.”
They did so, and he went to one side of the bridge, and unloosed the mouth of the sack, and shook out the meal into the river. Then said he—
“How much meal is there in the sack, neighbours?”
“Marry,” answered they, “none.”
“Now, by my faith,” replied this wise man, “even so much wit is there in your two heads, to strive concerning that thing which you have not.”
Now, which was the wisest of all these three persons I leave you to judge.