THE MINISTER AND THE GOSSOON.
PREFACE.
This curious little piece is another dialogue in the same form as the last. These are the only two stories, if one may call them stories, which I have found couched in this form, so partly for that reason I give it here.
THE STORY
One day there was a poor little gossoon on the side of the road, and he taking care of an old sow of a pig, and a litter of bonhams along with her. A minister came the way, and he riding upon a fine horse, and he said to the gossoon, "Where does this road bring you?"
Gossoon.
I'm here for a fortnight, and it never brought me anywhere yet.
Minister.
Now, isn't it the wise little boy you are! Whose are the little pigs?
Gossoon.
They're the old sow's.
Minister.
I know that, but I'm asking you who is the master of the bonhams.
Gossoon.
That little black-and-white devil that you see rooting, he's able to beat the whole of them.
Minister.
That's not what I'm asking you at all, but who is your own master?
Gossoon.
My mistress's husband, a man as good as you'd get from here to himself.
Minister.
You don't understand me yet. Who is your mistress—perhaps you understand that?
Gossoon.
I understand you well. She is my master's wife. Everyone knows that.
Minister.
You're a wise little boy; and it's as good for me to let you be, but tell me do you know where Patrick O'Donnell is living?
Gossoon.
Yes, indeed. Follow this road until you come to a boreen on the side of your thumb-hand. Then follow your nose, and if you go astray break the guide.
Minister.
Indeed, and you're a ripe (precocious) little lad! What trade will you have when you'll be older?
Gossoon.
Herding a pig. Don't you see that I'm putting in my term. What is your own trade?
Minister.
A good trade. I am showing the people what is the way to heaven.
Gossoon.
Oh, what a liar! You can't show the way to any place. You don't know the way to Patrick O'Donnell's, a man that everybody—big and little—in this country knows, and I'm certain sure you have no knowledge of the road to heaven.
Minister.
I'm beaten. Here's half a crown for you for your cleverness, and when I come again you'll get another.
Gossoon.
Thank you. It's a pity that a fool like you doesn't come the way every day.