NOT FOR PATRICK!
["It has been proposed that the kilt should be the uniform of the new Irish Guards."—Daily Paper.]
What! take away the throusers off our pathriotic knees,
As if we were a regiment of disordherly M.P's?
Och! sorrer take the wicked thought, for histhory it teaches,
An Oirishman is happiest when foightin' in the breaches.
What! Wear them bits of pitticoats that blow about and twirl
Around your blushin' knees? No, faith! Oi'm not a bally girl!
No! Oi'm an Oirish souldier, an' me blood Oi've often spilt it,
But though Oi'm willin' to be kilt, Oi'll die before Oi'm kilted.
In order to check extravagance in the Cavalry, the authorities have decided that "fines of money or wine are no longer to be levied on marriage or promotion, or in respect of any minor irregularities." In future the officer who commits the major irregularity of being promoted will not need to say, with the King of Denmark, "O, my offence is rank!"
