A Pastoral Rebuke.
First Pedestrian (they've lost their way), "Look here. This must be the east, mustn't it? There's the chancel window—that's always east; then the south must be——"
High-Church Priest ("turning up" suddenly out of the vestry), "I beg your pardon, gentlemen, but I can't allow my church to be used for a secular purpose. You'll find an unconsecrated weathercock on the barn yonder!"
Visitor. "Will you tell me where I shall find a seat?"
Verger. "Weel, sir, there's a guid wheen veesitors in Inverness the noo: so sit whaur ye can see yer umbrella!"