DROP BY DROP
Nine Stages of a Love Story
First place, I dropped my eye on her,
And she dropped hers, so blushfully!
Then I "dropped in,"—her sire sold fur,—
Then "dropped a line," most gushfully.
I dropped a deal of ready cash
On her and her relations,
Then dropped some hints—that course proved rash—
About her "expectations."
She dropped on me, daring to ask
Such questions. Here I stopped her.
Her—bankrupt—sire then dropped the mask,
And I—well then, I dropped her!
Definitions.—Mater: One who finds mates for her daughters. Check Mate: A husband with money.
"THE MISSIS" WOULD OBLIGE
Philanthropist. "I'm sorry to see you in this condition, Parker. I'm afraid you'll miss the lecture to-night."
Parker. "Oh no, I shan't. I'm goin'—shtraightome."