CHRISTMAS COMES BUT ONCE A YEAR
Cabby (to Gent who has been dining out). "'Ere y'are, sir. This is your 'ouse—get out—be careful, sir—'ere's the step?"
Gent. "Yesh. Thash allri, but wersh my feet?"
Employer (who simply WON'T take any excuse for unpunctuality). "You are very late, Mr. Jones. Go back at once, and come at the proper time!"
Hairdresser. "Hair begins to get very thin, sir."
Customer. "Yes."
Hairdresser. "Have you tried our tonic lotion?"
Customer. "Yes. That didn't do it though."
"I 'ear that Tholomon Arons 'as 'ad 'is shop burnt out!"
"Well, 'e 'th a very good feller, Aronth ith. 'E detherves it!"
