In the Humour of the Age.
‘Marriage, that was only contriv'd for the meaner Rank; tell me of Marriage, commend me to a Whore.
‘Every serious Thought, was so much Time lost.
‘We address you with the same awful Reverence we petition Heaven.
In Sir Courtly Nice.
‘Nay, his Salvation is a Looking-Glass, for there he finds his eternal Happiness, Surly's Heaven, at least his Priest is his Claret-Glass, for to that he confesses all his Sins, and from it receives Absolution and Comfort. But his Damnation is a Looking-Glass, for there he finds an eternal Fire in his Nose.
‘That same thing, the Word Love, is a Fig-Leaf to cover the naked Sense, a Fashion brought up by Eve, the Mother of Jilts, she Cuckold her Husband with the Serpent, then pretended to Modesty, and fell a making of Plackets.
‘Let him be in Misery and be damn'd.
‘And a Pox on thee for't.
‘Prithee Dress and be damn'd.
‘Pox on 'em: Pox on you all Whores.
‘Pox take him.
‘Rot me.
‘Let him Plague you, Pox you, and damn you; I don't care and be damn'd.
The following Expressions are transcribed out of the Plays that have been Acted and Printed since they were Indicted for the horrid Passages above-recited.
In the Comedy call'd, The False Friend. 1702.
Pag. 7. ‘Pox take ye. Pag. 12 ‘The Devil fetch me, &c.
Pag. 22. ‘Heaven's Blessing must needs fall upon so dutiful a Son; but I don't know how its Judgments may deal with so indifferent a Lover.
Pag. 28. ‘Say that 'tis true, you are married to another, and that a—— Twou'd be a Sin to think of any Body but your Husband, and that —— You are of a timorous Nature, and afraid of being damn'd.
‘How have I lov'd, to Heaven I appeal; but Heaven does now permit that Love no more.
‘Why does it then permit us Life and Thought? Are we deceiv'd in its Omnipotence? Is it reduc'd to find its Pleasure in its Creature's Pain?
Pag. 33. ‘Leonora's Charms turn Vice to Virtue, Treason into Truth; Nature, who has made her the Supream Object of our Desires must needs have design'd her the Regulator of our Morals.
‘There he goes I'faith; he seem'd as if he had a Qualm just now; but he never goes without a Dram of Conscience-water about him to set Matters right again.
Pag. 43. ‘Speak, or by all the Flame and Fire of Hell eternal; speak, or thou art dead.
In the Inconstant, or the Way to Win him. 1702.
Pag. 10. ‘My Blessing! Damn ye, you young Rogue.
Pag. 20. ‘What do you pray for? Why, for a Husband; that is, you implore Providence to assist you in the just and pious Design of making the wisest of his Creatures a Fool, and the Head of the Creation a Slave.
Pag. 43. ‘But don't you think there is a great deal of Merit in dedicating a beautiful Face to the Service of Religion?
‘Not half so much as devoting them to a pretty Fellow. If our Femality had no Business in this World, why was it sent hither? Let's dedicate our beautiful Minds to the Service of Heaven: And for our handsom Persons, they become a Box at the Play, as well as a Pew in the Church.
In the Modish Husband.
Pag. 12. ‘She's mad with the Whimsies of Virtue and the Devil.
Pag. 28. ‘I think Wit the most impertinent thing that belongs to a Woman, except Virtue.
Pag. 47. ‘The Devil fetch him.
Pag. 50. ‘I'm going towards Heaven, Sirrah; it must be the Way to my Mistress.
In the Play call'd, Vice Reclaim'd, &c.
Pag. 15. ‘Now the Devil take that dear false agreeable; what shall I call him, Wilding. But I'll go home and pray heartily we may meet again to morrow.
‘By Heaven, &c.
Pag. 24. ‘By Heaven it becomes you.
Pag. 27. ‘The Devil take me.
Pag. 31. ‘Lightning blast him! Thunder rivet him to the Earth! That Vulture, Conscience, prey upon his Heart, and rack him to Despair!
Pag. 32. ‘Grant me, ye Powers, one lucky Hint for Mischief.
Pag. 43. ‘Then damn me, if I don't, &c.
Pag. 47. ‘Rot me and be damn'd.
Pag. 52. ‘By Heaven, &c.
Pag. 60. ‘Well, the Devil take me.
In the Different Widows.
Pag. 1. ‘Damn'd Lies, by Jupiter and Juno, and the rest of the Heathen Gods and Goddesses; for I remember I paid two Guinea's for swearing Christian Oaths last Night.
Pag. 2. ‘Pox take him. Pag. 24. ‘Ye immortal Gods, who the Devil am I?
Pag. 61. ‘May the Devil, Curses, Plagues and Disappointments light upon you.
In the Fickle Shepherdess.
Pag. 17. ‘Bid Charon instantly prepare his Boat, I'd row to Hell.
Ibid. ‘O Ceres, can thy all-seeing Eye behold this Object, and yet restrain thy Pity?
Pag. 32. ‘Fly hence to Hell; there hide thy Head lower than Darkness. Wou'd thou hadst been acting Incest, Murder, Witchcraft, when thou cam'st to pray: Thou hadst in any thing sinn'd less than in this Devotion.
Pag. 36. ‘Where Love's blind, God sends forth continual Arrows.
Pag. 42. ‘Ceres, to whom we all things owe.
Pag. 46. ‘Almighty Ceres.
In the Play called, Marry or do Worse, 1704.
Pag. 4. ‘Pox on me. Rot the World.
Pag. 6. ‘Pox on him.
Pag. 8. ‘A Plague on her.
‘The Devil take you for a Witch. The Devil take you for a Fool.
Pag. 12. ‘No Matrimony; the Devil danced at the first Wedding there was, and Cuckoldom has been in Fashion ever since.
‘The Devil take you for me.
Pag. 12 & 13. ‘The Devil's in't if he been't fit for Heaven, when my Master has writ Cuckoldom there.
‘The Devil take me &c.
Pag. 18. ‘A Plague choak you,
Pag. 21. ‘A smart Jade by Heaven.
Pag. 33. ‘Now the Devil take him &c.
Pag. 37. ‘A Plague on my Master.
Pag. 44. ‘The Devil take me, &c.
Pag. 47. ‘I pity him, and yet a Pox on him too.
Pag. 51. ‘That dear damn'd Virtue of hers tempts me strangely.
Pag. 54. ‘The Devil take me, &c.
Pag. 64. ‘By Heaven.
It must be again remembred, that the detestable lewd Expressions contained in the abovementioned Plays, which seem to be the most pernicious part of our Comedies, are not here recited, least they should debauch the Minds and corrupt the Manners of the Reader, and do the same Mischief, in some degree, as they do in the greatest when used upon the Stage, tho' mentioned with never so great Indignation. And it must be likewise taken notice of, that these Instances of the prophane Language of Plays, which the good Christian will read with Horror, would not have been put together, and laid before the World, had not the Incorrigibleness of the Players made it necessary for the Ends abovementioned.
And now may not these plain Questions be proposed, without Offence, to the Persons who frequent our Play-Houses; and especially to such of them as appear at any times in our Churches, and at the Holy Sacrament, and be submitted to the Judgment of all Mankind.
I. Can Persons who frequent the Play-Houses, and are not displeased to hear Almighty God blasphemed, his Providence questioned and denied, his Name prophaned, his Attributes ascribed to sinful Creatures, and even to Heathen Gods, his Holy Word burlesqued, and treated as a Fable, his Grace made a Jest of, his Ministers despised, Conscience laught at, and Religion ridiculed; in short, the Christian Faith and Doctrine exposed, and the sincere Practice of Religion represented as the Effect of Vapours and Melancholy, Virtue discountenanced, and Vice encouraged. Evil treated as Good, and Good as Evil, and all this highly aggravated by being done in cool Blood, upon Choice and Deliberation? Can those, I say, that frequent the Play-Houses, and are not displeased with any of these things, be thought to have any due Sense of Religion?
II. Can Persons who often spend their Time and Money to see Plays, be suppos'd to be displeas'd with, and to have a due Indignation at, the Hearing the Outrages beforementioned, which so often occur in them, and of which there is a dismal Specimen laid before the World in this Paper?
III. Can sincere Christians encourage and assist, by their Presence and Purses, Men in committing such Practices, and in their living by a Profession, which, as it is managed, is so inconsistent with Christianity?
IV. Can any who have a true Concern for the Honour of Almighty God, give Countenance and Support to such Entertainments whereby he is so dishonour'd and affronted, though they could suppose themselves above the Danger of being the worse for them, which they can never be?
V. Can Persons who know 'tis generally allowed, that the Infidelity and Looseness of the Age is very much owing to the Play-Houses; who have observed, that the Zeal of particular Persons have decreased, and their Strictness of Life abated, by their going to Plays; and do think that the Gospel obliges them to discourage, by their Reproof and Example, Sin in their Neighbours, to endeavour, according to their Advantages and Opportunities, to further their spiritual Welfare, and to be Lights to lead others in their Duty and Way to Heaven? Can such, tho' they could think themselves wholly secure from taking Infection in going to the Play-House, encourage others, even weak and feeble Christians, by their Example, to run to the same dangerous Place likewise? Can this be thought an Expression of their Charity to their Neighbour, or to be acceptable to Almighty God? or rather, Should not Compassion to the Souls of their Neighbours keep such as have a due Concern for them from going to such Places?
VI. Can it be denied, but that the going of a few sober Persons, tho' but once a Year, to see a Play, that they think less offensive and dangerous, does encourage many others to go frequently to Plays, and to those that are more abominably loose and prophane; who might never go at all to them, if none frequented them but such as were entirely abandoned to Shame as well as Vice?
VII. Can Persons who have good Dispositions to Religion, who go but once or twice in a Year to the Play-House, say, upon their Experience, that they think the seeing of Plays is proper to encrease the Love of God in Men, to fit them for holy Exercises, and to promote their spiritual Welfare? or rather, Must they not own, that by the seeing of Plays they are more indisposed for Religious Performances; that the Awe and Reverence which they had for God and Religion, and the Horrour which they had at the Sins which they there see Men divert themselves with, and make a Jest of, does thereby wear off; that their sensual Desires are more heightned and enflamed; that they are more alienated from God, and more enamoured with the World?
VIII. Can Persons who are sensible of, and do heartily lament their want of the Love and Fear of God, their too great a Love of the World, the frequent Distractions of their Mind in Prayer, and the Unruliness of their Lusts and Passions, delight to frequent a Place where they are surrounded with Temptations to the Love of the World; where what can excite to unlawful Desires and Actions is promoted; and the Arts of an easie Defilement are studied? Can they think this consistent with the Rules of keeping from all Appearance of Evil, of avoiding the Occasions and Temptations to Sin, and that Watchfulness over their Thoughts, and that Diligence in making their Calling and Election sure, as the Gospel requires? Do they in any wise herein adorn their Profession, resemble the Christians who lived in the first Ages of Christianity; or those who in any Age since have been celebrated for their Virtue?
IX. Can Persons in good earnest pray, as they are directed in the Lord's-Prayer, Not to be led into Temptation, and yet frequent the Play-House, where they are assaulted with more and greater Temptations than incounter them perhaps in any other Place?
X. Can such Persons as go to the Play-Houses on Week-days, and appear in our Churches on the Lord's-day, and even at the Holy Sacrament, where they declare, that they present themselves, their Souls and Bodies, as a reasonable, holy and lively Sacrifice to God, be suppos'd to attend upon these Holy Ordinances with a suitable Frame of Mind; since the Language and Design of Sermons, and of our Liturgy, and of Plays, are so different and even directly contrary to each other?
XI. Can Ladies really dislike Lewd Discourse in Conversation, and yet like to see Lewdness represented in all the Dresses that can vitiate the Imagination, and fasten upon the Memory?
XII. Can Parents, or any other Persons who have the Conduct of Youth, and have any serious Concern for the Souls of their Children, or of those that are committed to their Care, satisfie their Consciences, without Restraining them from going to a place of such Impiety and Infection; where they would be in the way to unlearn the best Instructions of their Parents and Governours; where Pride and Falshood, Malice and Revenge, Injustice and Immodesty, Contempt of Marriage, and false Notions of Honour, are recommended; where Men are taught to call in question the first Principles of their Religion, and are led to a contempt of Sacred things?
XIII. Can sincere and judicious Christians think that the Players exposing (as they pretend to do) Formality, Humour, and Pedantry, is an Equivalent for their insulting sacred things, and their promoting to so high a degree the Prophaneness and Debauchery of the Nation?
XIV. Can modest and prudent Christians think, that the Opinion of the General Councils, Primitive Fathers, and so many wise and good Men in the several Ages of the Church, who have condemned the going to Plays as unlawful, and as a renouncing the Baptismal Engagements, doth not deserve great regard?
XV. Can sincerely religious Persons hear of the most horrid, licentious Treatment of sacred things as is in our Plays, and this not among Mahometans and Infidels, not at Rome and Venice, but in a Protestant Countrey, without a Fear that the Judgments of God will fall upon us?
XVI. Can less be expected from good Christians, who are sensible of the intolerable Disorders of the Play-Houses, and the Mischiefs that are brought upon Mankind by them, than that they would use all proper Methods for the Discouraging and Restraining their Relations and Friends from going to them, as they have any Concern for the Honour of God, the Good of Mankind, and the Welfare of their own Immortal Souls; that so by Persons, who have any virtuous Principles, keeping from a Place which they will never be able to frequent with Safety to themselves, under any partial Regulation; the Players, the unhappy, the miserable Players, may be necessitated to quit their Profession, and take upon them some honest and useful Employment (wherein good Men ought to encourage and assist them) and thereby the execrable Impieties of the Play-Houses, and the ruinous consequences of them, be prevented?
XVII. Lastly, Can Persons frequent the Play-Houses, after the outragious Impieties of them, and the fatal Effects of their going to them, are in so full and advantageous a manner laid open to the World, without a greater Aggravation of their Guilt?
FINIS.
Some
THOUGHTS
Concerning the
STAGE
IN A
LETTER
TO A
LADY
London, Printed Anno Dom. 1704
Madam,
It is with no little Pleasure I behold you treading in the Paths of Virtue, and practising the Duties of a Holy and Religious life. This, as it has deservedly gain'd you the Love and Admiration of all that know you: so, I doubt not, but you will always find it a Fund of solid Peace and Satisfaction to your own Mind. I heartily wish there were many more such bright Examples in the World, that the Ladies might be at last convinc'd, That there is something worthy their Imitation beyond the Modes of Dress and Equipage; something which will render them much more agreeable to the best and wisest of their Admirers, and, in time, no less pleasing to themselves. I make no doubt but the Age (as corrupt as it is) can furnish us with many Instances of those of your Sex, who think the Beauty of the Mind does far surpass the gay Appearances of the most splendid Outside: But yet, it must be confessed, that there are others, (and those not a few) whose Lives are almost one continued Circle of Vanity and Folly. Such as divide the best and most precious part of their Time between their Toilet, the Exchange, and the Play-House. This, I believe, upon Enquiry, will appear to be no unjust Censure; tho' at the same time, Madam, I must freely own to you, that I think it a most amazing thing, that the Ladies (at least those who make any Pretensions to Virtue and Goodness) should ever be seen at the last of these Places; where they find themselves so scandalously treated. I am apt to think, that very few of 'em have read Mr. Collier's View of the Stage; if they had, they would there see the Corruptions of the Plays set in so clear a Light, that one would believe, they should never after be Tempted to appear in a Place where Lewdness and Obscenity (not to mention other Immoralities) are so great a part of the Entertainment; a Place that is now become the Common Rendezvouz of the most Lewd and Dissolute Persons; the Exchange, (if I may so call it) where they meet to carry on the vilest and worst of Practices. 'Tis the Nursery of all manner of Wickedness, where the Seeds of Atheism and Irreligion are sown, which Weak and Tender Minds too readily cultivate, and from thence are easily led into a Contempt of all that's Serious. It is impossible to say, how many, and how great the Mischiefs are that spring from thence; which if a Man should take a View of, it would perhaps, be one of the most Melancholy Prospects that ever he beheld. To look into our Modern Plays, and there to see the Differences of Good and Evil confounded, Prophaneness, Irreligion, and Unlawful Love, made the masterly Stroaks of the fine Gentleman; Swearing, Cursing, and Blaspheming, the Graces of his Conversation; and Unchristian Revenge, to consummate the Character of the Hero; Sharpness and Poignancy of Wit exerted with the greatest Vigor against the Holy Order; in short, Religion and all that is Sacred, Burlesqu'd and Ridicul'd; To see this, I say, and withall, to reflect upon the fatal Effects which these things have already had, and how much worse are likely to follow, if not timely prevented, cannot but fill the Minds of all good Men with very dismal Apprehensions.
And are these then the Entertainments for a Christian to be pleas'd with; for one whose Salvation is to be wrought out with Fear and Trembling? Will the Strictnesses of Virtue and Religion be ever relished by a Mind tinctur'd with such Licentious Representations? Must not such Diversions (to say no worse of 'em) insensibly steal upon the Affections, especially of the Younger sort; give their Minds quite a wrong Biass, and disarm them of that Severity which is their greatest Guard, and which, when once lost, leaves 'em an easie Prey to every Temptation? Will not those Lewd Scenes of Love, wherewith almost every Play is fraught, inflame the Fancy, heighten the Imagination, and render a Person thus prepar'd, a fit Subject for ill designing People to work on? But suppose it were possible to be so armed as to be Proof against all these Dangers; yet let any that have the least Regard to what is Serious, tell me how they can answer it to God, or their own Consciences, to be any ways Instrumental towards the Support of so much Wickedness? Do they think it a Sin to give the least Encouragement to Vice, and at the same time believe themselves Innocent, when by their Persons, and their Purses, they contribute to the cherishing the very Seed-Plot of Irreligion? 'Tis to no purpose for such to say, That they are cautious what Plays they see, and always go to the best and that the Play-Houses would thrive whether they frequented them or no. This may he true, but what then, Will this excuse them? Suppose a powerful Rebellion is begun in a Nation, and carried on successfully, for some time; and a Man should not only appear sometimes among the Rebels, but should, now and then, send them a Supply (tho' never so little) of Money and Arms: Could such a one pretend that he was no ways Instrumental in this Rebellion, nor Accessary to the Mischiefs that attended it, and that because it was not only begun, but would have prosper'd too, without him; and altho' he did sometimes appear among the Authors of it, yet it was with the Party which did the least Mischief? Do you think, Madam, this a just way of Reasoning? I dare say you do not. Is not this then the very Case I am speaking of? Is the Stage, as 'tis now manag'd, any thing else but a downright Rebellion against God and his Holy Religion? Are not the Plays, (if not by Design) yet by a natural and necessary Consequence, an undermining of his Laws, and an Attempt upon his Government? And must it not then follow, that every one that frequents them, is a Party in the Cause, and encourages the Undertaking? And tho' he should be so Happy as never to smile at a Prophane Jest, nor join in Applauding a Vitious Play; yet, will that exempt him from a Share of that Guilt which his Presence and Purse has help'd to support? No, Madam, 'tis Numbers strengthen the Enemy, and give fresh Courage to his Attempts! A Full House is the very Life of the Stage, and keeps it in Countenance, whereas thin Audiences would, in time, make it dwindle to nothing.
I know, Madam, this is strange Doctrine to some People. If a Man talks to them of leaving the Plays, they wonder what he means, and are ready to take him for a Madman. They have so long habituated themselves to the Play-Houses, that they begin to think a Place there, to be part of their Birth-Right: But I desire such would be perswaded to hear what the late A. B. Tillotson thought of these matters, (and I hope some Deference is due to his Judgment). If they look into the 11th Volume of his Sermons, they will find that in his Discourse against the Evil of Corrupt Communication, he tells them, That Plays, as the Stage now is, are intolerable, and not fit to be permitted in a Civiliz'd, much less in a Christian Nation, They do most notoriously minister, says he, both to Infidelity and Vice. By the Prophaneness of them they are apt to instil bad Principles into the Minds of Men, and to lessen that Awe, and Reverence which all Men ought to have for God and Religion: and by their Lewdness they teach Vice, and art apt to infect the Minds of Men, and dispose them to Lewd and Dissolute Practices. And therefore, says he, I do not see how any Person pretending to Sobriety and Virtue, and especially to the pure and holy Religion of our Blessed Saviour; can, without great Guilt and open Contradiction to his Holy Profession, be present at such Lewd and Immodest Plays, much less frequent them, as too many do, who would yet take it very ill to be shut out of the Communion of Christians, as they would most certainly have been in the first and purest Ages of Christianity.
This is the Opinion, Madam, of that Excellent Man: and, one would think, it should put those Persons who are the Encouragers of Plays, and the Frequenters of them, when they read it, upon an Enquiry, What it is they are doing? Whether they are not carrying on the Designs of the great Enemy of Mankind? But if that will not prevail upon them, let 'em reflect upon the late Instance of God's severe Displeasure against us, and tell me then, whether they think it consistent with that Humiliation and Repentance which this great Judgment ought to awaken in us, and which Her Majesty, by Her late Gracious Proclamation, calls upon us to Exercise, to be ever again present at a Place, where they must often hear the Name of God Prophaned, and every thing that is Serious made a Jest of? A Place which they cannot but know, and must own, (if put to the Question) has contributed so much to the Corrupting the present Age; and which, 'tis to be fear'd, is one of those accursed things, that has provok'd the Almighty to be so angry with us.
These are things, Madam, of no trifling Importance; they are such as deserve the serious Reflections of all good Christians, whatever the Pretenders to Gaiety may think. And though some may, perhaps, misconstrue and ridicule such Considerations by the Names of Preciseness and Fanaticism; yet, 'tis to be hop'd, that all who have any regard for the Honour of God, the Welfare of their Countrey, and the Interest of our Established Church, will not be laugh'd out of their Duty, but be perswaded, not only to withdraw themselves from a Place of so much Danger, but advise others to do the like; that the Stage may no longer Triumph in the Spoils of Virtue and Religion. 'Tis now the time to begin such an Undertaking: We have a powerful Enemy abroad, and a more formidable one at home; I mean that Looseness and Irreligion which so abounds: and what will it avail us to subdue the one, while we encourage the other? The Hand of God has been lifted up against us, we have seen the Terrors of the Lord, and felt the Arrows of the Almighty; and what can all this mean, but to awaken us to a due Sense of our Danger? And, 'tis to be hop'd, the Nation has already taken the Alarm, and begin to think how to avert God's Displeasure. The Stage is called in Question, and Papers are dispers'd to warn us of its Mischiefs; and it is not improbable that the Licentious and Unbounded Liberty the Players have taken of late years, and particularly in their daring to Act THE TEMPEST within a very few Days after the late dreadful Storm, has rais'd in the Minds of Men such an Abhorrence and Indignation, that we may possibly be so happy as to see the Stage (if not totally suppress'd) yet brought under such a Regulation, both as to the Plays that are Acted, and the Company that Resort to them, that Foreigners may no longer stand amaz'd when brought into our Theatres, nor Good Men tremble at the Continuance of them: but that Virtue may appear there with all its Charms, and Vice be expos'd to the utmost Contempt. In short, that the Stage may become so Chast, that even those Birds of Prey who now hover about the Play-Houses and make the Avenues to 'em so dangerous, may fly away from a Place that will no longer Encourage nor Protect them.
But after all, Madam, Whether this is such a Scheme as can ever be reduc'd in Practice; whether so noble a Structure as I am speaking of, can be erected upon so rotten a Foundation; whether the Wound is not Gangreen'd, and must be cur'd by Excision; I say, whether such a Regulation of the Stage be possible, must be left to those who have Skill and Authority to try the Experiment. In the mean time, it will be every one's Duty to run from a Place of such Infection, least they contribute to the spreading a Disease which may, in time, prove Fatal to the whole Nation. But I forget, Madam, I am intrenching upon your Patience, while I detain you in a place you have so long abandon'd. I am fallen upon a Subject, which 'tis difficult not to say much of: but I shall no longer interrupt your better Thoughts, than while I beg Pardon for this Trouble, who am,
Madam,
Your very Humble Servant.
Jan. 10th.
1704.
A / Representation / of the / Impiety & Immorality / of the / English Stage, / with / Reasons for putting a Stop thereto: / and some Questions Addrest to / those who frequent the Play-/ Houses. / London, / Printed, and are to be Sold by J. Nutt / near Stationers-Hall, 1704 / [enclosed within double frame of rules]
Collation: A8 B4. Pp. [ 1-] 24. P. [1] title, as above; p. [2] blank; pp. 3-24 text.
Three editions were issued in 1704. If we take the author's words literally, the pamphlet was written between the "Great Storm" of November 26, 1703 and the day of fasting decreed by Queen Anne for January 19, 1704. According to Arthur Bedford (The Evil and Danger of Stage Plays ... London, 1706) the pamphlet was published "At the Time of the Fast ..."
Colton Storm