Actus. iiii. Scæna. iii.
Christian Custance. Sym Suresby. Ralph Roister. Mathew Merygreke. Trupeny.
C. Custance. What meane these lewde felowes thus to trouble me stil?
Sym Suresby here perchance shal therof deme som yll.
And shall supect[540] in me some point of naughtinesse,
And they come hitherward.
Sim Sure. What is their businesse?
C. Custance. I have nought to them, nor they to me in sadnesse 5
Sim Sure. Let us hearken them, somewhat there is I feare it.
R. Royster. I will speake out aloude best, that she may heare it.
M. Mery. Nay alas, ye may so feare hir out of hir wit.
R. Royster. By the crosse of my sworde, I will hurt hir no whit.
M. Mery. Will ye doe no harme in deede, shall I trust your worde? 10
R. Royster. By Roister Doisters fayth I will speake but in borde.
Sim Sure. Let us hearken them, somwhat there is I feare it.
R. Royster. I will speake out aloude, I care not who heare it:
Sirs, see that my harnesse, my tergat, and my shield,
Be made as bright now, as when I was last in fielde, 15
As white as I shoulde to warre againe to morrowe:
For sicke shall I be, but I worke some folke sorow.
Therfore see that all shine as bright as sainct George,
Or as doth a key newly come from the Smiths forge.
I woulde have my sworde and harnesse to shine so bright,[541] F iii b 20
That I might therwith dimme mine enimies sight,
I would have it cast beames as fast I tell you playne,
As doth the glittryng grasse after a showre of raine.
And see that in case I shoulde neede to come to arming,
All things may be ready at a minutes warning, 25
For such chaunce may chaunce in an houre, do ye heare?
M. Mery. As perchance shall not chaunce againe in seven yeare.
R. Royster. Now draw we neare to hir, and here what shall be sayde. [Advances towards Cust.]
M. Mery. But I woulde not have you make hir too muche afrayde.
R. Royster. Well founde sweete wife[542] (I trust) for al this your soure looke. 30
C. Custance. Wife, why cal ye me wife?
Sim Sure. [enters while the last words are spoken]. Wife? this gear goth acrook.
M. Mery. Nay mistresse Custance, I warrant you, our letter
Is not as we redde een nowe, but much better,
And where ye halfe stomaked this gentleman afore,
For this same letter, ye wyll love hym now therefore, 35
Nor it is not this letter, though ye were a queene,
That shoulde breake marriage betweene you twaine I weene.
C. Custance. I did not refuse hym for the letters sake.
R. Royster. Then ye are content me for your husbande to take.
C. Custance. You for my husbande to take? nothing lesse truely. 40
R. Royster. Yea say so, sweete spouse, afore straungers hardly.
M. Mery. And though I have here his letter of love with me,
Yet his ryng and tokens he sent, keepe safe with ye.
C. Custance. A mischiefe take his tokens, and him and thee too.
But what prate I with fooles? have I nought else to doo? 45
Come in with me Sym Suresby to take some repast.
Sim Sure. I must ere I drinke by your leave, goe in all hast,
To a place or two, with earnest letters of his.
C. Custance. Then come drink here with me.
Sim Sure. I thank you.
C. Custance. Do not misse.
You shall have a token to your maister with you. 50
Sym Sure. No tokens this time gramercies, God be with you.
Exeat.
C. Custance. Surely this fellowe misdeemeth some yll in me.
Which thing but God helpe, will go neere to spill me.
R. Royster. Yea farewell fellow, and tell thy maister Goodlucke
That he cometh to late of thys blossome to plucke. F iv 55
Let him keepe him there still, or at least wise make no hast.
As for his labour hither he shall spende in wast.
His betters be in place nowe.
M. Mery [aside]. As long as it will hold.
C. Custance. I will be even with thee thou beast, thou mayst be bolde.
R. Royster. Will ye have us then? 60
C. Custance. I will never have thee.[543]
R. Royster. Then will I have you!
C. Custance. No, the devill shall have thee.
I have gotten this houre more shame and harme by thee,
Then all thy life days thou canst do me honestie.
M. Mery [to Roister]. Why nowe may ye see what it comth too in the ende,
To make a deadly foe of your most loving frende: 65
[To Custance]. And ywis this letter if ye woulde heare it now—
C. Custance. I will heare none of it.
M. Mery [to Cust.]. In faith would ravishe you.
C. Custance. He hath stained my name for ever this is cleare.
R. Royster. I can make all as well in an houre—
M. Mery [aside]. As ten yeare—
[To Cust.]. How say ye, will ye have him? 70
C. Custance. No.
M. Mery. Will ye take him?
C. Custance. I defie him.
M. Mery. At my word?
C. Custance. A shame take him.
Waste no more wynde, for it will never bee.
M. Mery. This one faulte with twaine shall be mended, ye shall see.
Gentle mistresse Custance now, good mistresse Custance,
Honey mistresse Custance now, sweete mistresse Custance, 75
Golden mistresse Custance now, white[544] mistresse Custance,
Silken mistresse Custance now, faire mistresse Custance.
C. Custance. Faith rather than to mary with suche a doltishe loute,
I woulde matche my selfe with a beggar out of doute.
M. Mery. Then I can say no more, to speede we are not like, 80
Except ye rappe out a ragge of your Rhetorike.
C. Custance. Speake not of winnyng me: for it shall never be so.
R. Royster. Yes dame, I will have you whether ye will or no,
I commaunde you to love me, wherfore shoulde ye not?
Is not my love to you chafing and burning hot? 85
M. Mery. Too hir, that is well sayd.
R. Royster. Shall I so breake my braine
To dote upon you, and ye not love us againe?
M. Mery. Wel sayd yet.
C. Custance. Go to[,] you goose.
R. Royster. I say Kit Custance,
In case ye will not haze,[545] well, better yes perchaunce. F iv b
C. Custance. Avaunt lozell,[546] picke thee hence. 90
M. Mery. Well sir, ye perceive,
For all your kinde offer, she will not you receive.
R. Royster. Then a strawe for hir, and a strawe for hir againe,
She shall not be my wife, woulde she never so faine,
No and though she would be at ten thousand pounde cost.
M. Mery. Lo dame, ye may see what an husbande ye have lost. 95
C. Custance. Yea, no force, a jewell muche better lost than founde.
M. Mery. Ah, ye will not beleve how this doth my heart wounde.
How shoulde a mariage betwene you be towarde,
If both parties drawe backe, and become so frowarde.
R. Royster [threatening, advancing upon Cust.]. Nay dame, I will fire thee out of thy house,[547] 100
And destroy thee and all thine, and that by and by.
M. Mery. Nay for the passion of God sir, do not so.
R. Royster. Yes, except she will say yea to that she sayd no.
C. Custance. And what, be there no officers trow we, in towne
To checke idle loytrers,[548] braggyng up and downe? 105
Where be they, by whome vacabunds shoulde be represt?
That poore sillie[549] Widowes might live in peace and rest.
Shall I never ridde thee out of my companie?
I will call for helpe, what hough, come forth Trupenie.
Trupenie [entering]. Anon. What is your will mistresse? dyd ye call me? 110
C. Custance. Yea, go runne apace, and as fast as may be,
Pray Tristram Trusty, my moste assured frende,
To be here by and by, that he may me defende.
Trupenie. That message so quickly shall be done by Gods grace,
That at my returne ye shall say, I went apace. 115
Exeat.
C. Custance. Then shall we see I trowe, whether ye shall do me harme,
R. Royster. Yes in faith Kitte, I shall thee[550] and thine so charme,
That all women incarnate by thee may beware.
C. Custance. Nay, as for charming me, come hither if thou dare,
I shall cloute thee tyll thou stinke, both thee and thy traine, 120
And coyle thee mine owne handes, and sende thee home againe.
R. Royster. Yea sayst thou me that dame? dost thou me threaten?
Goe we, I still see whether I shall be beaten. Gi
M. Mery. Nay for the paishe[551] of God, let me now treate peace,
For bloudshed will there be in case this strife increace. 125
Ah good dame Custance, take better way with you.
C. Custance. Let him do his worst.
M. Mery. [Roister advances upon Cust., attempts to strike]. Yeld in time. [to Cust.]
R. Royster [is beaten back by Cust.; retiring to Mery.:]. Come hence thou.
Exeant Roister et Mery.