OF THE BARBER’S FOURTH BROTHER.
The name by which my fourth brother was called, was Alcouz. He lost his eye in the manner I shall have the honour to relate to your majesty. He was a butcher by trade! and as he had a particular talent in bringing up rams, and teaching them to fight, he from this circumstance acquired the friendship and knowledge of some of the principal people; who were much amused with these sorts of combats, and who even kept rams for this very purpose at their own houses. He had, besides, a very good business; and there was always in his shop the finest and most beautiful meat that was to be found in the market; because he was very rich, and did not spare expense in order to have the best.
As he was one day in his shop, an old man, who had a very long and white beard, came in to purchase six pounds of meat; he then paid his money and went away. My brother observed, that his money was very beautiful, new, and well coined. He resolved, therefore, to lay it by in a separate part of his closet. During five months the same old man came regularly every day for the same quantity of meat, and paid for it with the same sort of money, which my brother as regularly continued to lay by.
At the end of five months, Alcouz, having an inclination to make a purchase of a certain quantity of sheep, resolved to pay for them out of this particular money; the therefore went to his box, and opened it; but he was in the greatest astonishment, when he discovered, instead of his money, only a parcel of leaves cut round. He immediately began to beat himself, and made so great a noise, that he brought all his neighbours about him; whose surprise was as great as his own, when he informed them of what had passed. “I wish to God,” cried my brother, with tears in his eyes, “that this treacherous old man would at this instant make his appearance with his hypocritical face.” He had hardly spoken these words, when he saw him coming along at a distance. He ran in the greatest hurry to meet him, and having seized hold of him; “Mussulmen,” he vociferated with all his force, “assist me; only listen to the shameful trick that this infamous man has played me.” He then related to a large crowd of people, who had collected round him, the same story he had before done to his neighbours. When he had finished his tale, the old man, without the least emotion, quietly answered, You would do much better to let me go, and by this action make reparation for the affront you have thus offered me before so many people; lest I should return you the compliment in a more serious manner, which I should be sorry to do.”—“And what have you, pray, to say against me?” replied my brother, “I am an honest man in my business, and I fear you not.”—“You wish, then, that I should make it public,” returned the old man, in the same tone of voice. “Learn then,” added he, addressing himself to the people, “that instead of selling the flesh of sheep, as he ought to do, this man sells human flesh.”—“You are an impostor,” cried my brother.”—“No, no,” answered the other; for at this very moment I am speaking, there is a man with his throat cut, hanging up on the outside of your shop like a sheep. Let them go there, and we shall soon know, whether I have spoken the truth.”
Before my brother had opened the box where the leaves were, he had that morning killed a sheep, and had dressed and exposed it on the outside of his shop as usual. He therefore protested that what the old man had said was false; but in spite of all his protestations, the credulous mob, enraged at the idea of a man’s being guilty of so shocking a crime, wished to be assured of the fact on the spot. They therefore obliged my brother to let the old man go, and laid hold of him instead, and ran like fury to his shop, where they saw a man with his throat cut; and hung up exactly as the accuser had stated: for this old man was, in fact, a magician, and had deceived the eyes of all the people, as he had formerly done my brother, when he made him take the leaves he had given him, for real good money.
At sight of this, one of those who held Alcouz gave him a great blow with his fist, and at the same time said, “Is it thus then, rascal, that you make us eat human flesh?” The old man also, who had not left them, immediately gave him another blow, that knocked out one of his eyes. Every one, who could get near him, was not deficient in beating him. Nor were they satisfied with ill-treating him in this manner; they conducted him before the judge of the police, before whom they produced the pretended carcase, which they had taken down and brought with them, as a proof of the accused person’s guilt. “My lord,” said the old magician to him, “you see before you a man, who is so barbarous as to kill men, and sell their flesh for that of sheep. The public expect that you will punish him in an exemplary manner.” The judge of the police attended to what my brother had to say with great patience, but the story of the money, changed into leaves, appeared so little worthy of belief, that he treated my brother as an impostor; and choosing to give credit to his own eyes, he ordered him to receive five hundred blows. After this, having obliged him to discover where his money was, he took the whole of it from him, and condemned him to perpetual banishment, after having exposed him for three successive days, mounted on a camel, to all the city.
At the time that this dreadful adventure happened to Alcouz, my fourth brother, I was absent from Bagdad. He retired to a very obscure part, where he remained concealed till the wounds his punishment produced, were healed. It was chiefly on the back that he had been so beaten. As soon as he was able to walk he travelled, during the night and through unfrequented roads, to a city where he was known to no one! there he took a lodging, from whence he hardly ever stirred. Tired, however, at last of living so recluse a life, he one day went to walk in the suburbs of the town, when he suddenly heard a great noise of horsemen coming along behind him. He happened just at this instant to be near the door of a large house; and as he was apprehensive of every body, after what had passed, he fancied that these horsemen were in pursuit of him in order to arrest him. He therefore opened the door for the purpose of concealing himself. After having shut it again, he went into a large court, where he had no sooner appeared than two domestics came up to him and seized him by the collar, saying, “God be praised that you have come of your own free will, to give yourself up. You have disturbed us so much for these last three nights, we have been unable to sleep; and you have spared our lives only because we have prevented your base intention of taking them.”
You may easily imagine that my brother was not a little surprised at this sort of welcome. “My good friends,” said he to them, “I really know not what you wish of me; you without doubt take me for another person.”—“No, no,” replied they, “we are not ignorant that you and your comrades are free-booters. You were not satisfied with having robbed our master of all he possessed, and reducing him to beggary, but even wished to take his life. Let us see if you have not the knife about you, which you had in your hand when we pursued you last night.” Having said this, they began to search him, and perceived that he had a knife. “So, so,” cried they in taking it, “and have you the assurance still to deny that you are a robber?”—“What,” then answered my brother, “cannot a man carry a knife in his pocket, without being a thief? Listen to my story,” added he, “and instead of having a bad opinion of me, you will even be affected at my misfortunes.” So far, however, were they from listening to it, that they immediately fell upon him, trod upon him, pulled off his clothes, tore his shirt; and then observing the scars upon his back, “Ah, rascal,” they cried, redoubling their blows, “do you wish to make us believe you are an honest man, when your back is so covered with scars?”—“Alas,” cried my brother, “my sins must be very great, since, after having been once before so unjustly treated, I am served so a second time without being the least culpable.”
The two servants paid no attention to my brother’s complaints; but carried him before the judge of the police. “How dare you,” said the judge, “break into people’s houses, and pursue them with a knife in your hand?”—“My lord,” answered poor Alcouz, “I am one of the most innocent men in the world. I shall be undone, if you will not do me the favour patiently to listen to me. No person is more worthy of compassion than I am.”—“Sir,” cried one of the domestics at this instant, “will you listen for a moment to a robber, who breaks into people’s houses, pillages them, and murders the inhabitants? If you refuse to give us credit, look at his back, and that will prove enough.” When he had said this, they uncovered my brother’s back, and showed it to the judge, who immediately ordered him to receive upon the spot a hundred strokes, with a leathern strap, on his shoulders, without inquiring any farther into the matter: he then commanded him to be led through the city upon a camel, with a crier going before him, calling out, “this is the way they punish those who forcibly break into houses.”
When this ceremony was over, they set him down without the town, and forbad him ever to enter it again. Some people, who accidentally met him after this second disgraceful event, informed me where he was. I directly set out to find him, and then brought him secretly to Bagdad, where I did every thing, as far as I was able, to assist him.
The caliph Mostanser Billah (continued the barber), did not laugh so much at this history as at the others; for he had the goodness of heart to commiserate the unfortunate Alcouz. He then wished to give me something, and send me away; but without giving them time to obey his orders, I said, “You may now have observed, most sovereign lord and master, that I speak very little. Since your majesty has had the goodness to listen to me thus far, and as you express a wish to hear the adventures of my two other brothers, I hope and trust they will not afford you less amusement than what you have already heard. You may then make a most complete history of them, which will not be unworthy of being placed amongst your archives.”