My curse upon your venom'd stang, That shoots my tortur'd gooms alang; An' thro' my lug gies monie a twang, Wi' gnawing vengeance, Tearing my nerves wi' bitter pang, Like racking engines!
A' down my beard the slavers trickle! I throw the wee stools o'er the mickle, While round the fire the giglets keckle To see me loup; An', raving mad, I wish a heckle Were i' their doup! When fevers burn, or ague freezes, Rheumatics gnaw, or colic squeezes, Our neebors sympathize to ease us Wi' pitying moan; But thee!—thou hell o' a' diseases, They mock our groan! Of a' the num'rous human dools, Ill-hairsts, daft bargains, cutty-stools, Or worthy frien's laid i' the mools, Sad sight to see! The tricks o' knaves, or fash o' fools, Thou bear'st the gree! Whare'er that place be priests ca' hell, Whare a' the tones o' misery yell, An' rankèd plagues their numbers tell In dreadfu' raw, Thou, Toothache, surely bear'st the bell Amang them a'! O thou grim, mischief-making chiel, That gars the notes o' discord squeel, 'Till humankind aft dance a reel In gore a shoe-thick;— Gie a' the faes o' Scotland's weal A towmond's toothache!
Robert Burns.
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