SECTION XLIII.
Then seeing the king lying down stupified with grief Kauçalyā aggrieved for her son, spake unto the lord of earth, saying,—'O best of men, having vented her venom upon Rāghava, the crooked Kaikeyi will go about like a she- serpent that has cast off her slough. And that fortunate one having by her endeavours attained her end, will frighten me the more like a wicked serpent in one's house. If Rāma had stayed in this city subsisting himself by alms, or had I made my son as Kaikeyi's slave, even that would have been preferable (before his retirement to the woods). Like unto the sacrificial share cast unto the Rākshasas by the sacrificers on the occasions of Parvas, that wielder of the bow, the mighty-armed Rāma, gifted with the gait of the prince of elephants, cast off by Kaikeyi, takes refuge in the forest in company with his wife and Lakshmana. Despatched by you to the woods at the command of Kaikeyi, to what a plight will they, not inured to the privations of a forest-life, be reduced! And bereft of elegant apparel, how will they of tender years, exiled in this time of enjoyment, pass their lives in misery, subsisting on fruits and roots! Will such a time present itself now that my grief removed and my desire attained, I shall here behold Rāghava along with his wife and brother? When, hearing that those heroes have come, will Ayodhyā adorned with standards and garlands, attain fame, with her populace filled with joy? When, seeing those foremost of men returned from the forest, will the city overflow with delight, like the ocean on the occasion of a Parva? When will the mighty-armed hero enter the city of Ayodhyā, placing Sitā" before him on the car,—like unto a bull having his bovine mate before him? When will people by thousands shower fried paddy upon my sons on the road, as those repressors of foes will enter the city? When shall I behold those (two) wearing burnished ear-rings, entering Ayodhyā, placing before them their weapons and swords, like unto two hills furnished with their summits? When accepting flowers from girls and fruits from Brāhmanas, will they, filled with delight, go round the palace? When with his intelligence ripened by time, although resembling a celestial in age, will that righteous-souled one come here, rejoicing people like a Trivarsha?[144] Doubtless, O hero, formerly of vile ways that I was, I had cut off the paps of kine and thus prevented their calves hungering after their mothers' milk, from drinking it. And it is for this sin that, O foremost of men, have I, attached to my son, been forcibly deprived of him by Kaikeyi, like a cow deprived of her calf by a lion. Having an only son, I dare not live without him endowed with every virtue and versed in every branch of learning. Not seeing my beloved son and the mighty Lakshmana, I cannot live at all. As in summer the divine Sun furnished with fierce rays burns this earth, even so this raging fire of grief on account of my son consumes me."